Respected sir,
Not only my personal experience, but what I observed in my life period of 20-79
years, with my family, friend's families and relative's families and my
observation before my marriage.
However I am not for arguments on this matter. I remain from responding further.
Gopalakrishnan
On Friday, 26 May, 2023 at 11:33:25 pm IST, Rajaram Krishnamurthy
<[email protected]> wrote:
1 Two corrections - 1) do not hold good is more correct than does not hold
good , in my response. 2) If it is trying to understand, spouse the period will
not agree. It is a never ending process Gopalakrishnan2 I suppose that
both know that they are exploring each other with a view for matrimony and are
likely to present an impressive picture which may turn out to be a
disappointment later. Rangarajan3 Mostly what you wrote is the output even in
the last few decades also especially in India. GopalakrishnanKR As far as
Rangarajanji is concerned, it is true that ladies' mental make up is
unfathomable even after years, which is evidenced by BirthrHari and
Tiruvalluvar in Kamathupal. Even 2000 years back, Tiruvalluvar said, because
the husband sneezed, she said whom are you thinking about? And similar
parallels are shown in many kurals. Hence Rangarajan view is in line with, and
yet he did not deny the exploring each other as erroneous or had never taken
place. On the contrary, Mr G appears to have been confused, as his line of
writing is not so clear at all; rather it appears as if he is expressing his
personal experience; personal opinion is not relevant for the perception of the
society ,in general. "Dating is a stage of romantic relationships practised in
Western societies whereby two people meet socially with the aim of each
assessing the other's suitability as a prospective partner in a future intimate
relationship. It represents a form of courtship, consisting of social
activities carried out by the couple, either alone or with others." In Sanskrit
literature it is,"Saṃbandha (संबन्ध).—a. Able, capable.2) Fit, proper,
right.-ndhaḥ 1 Connection, union, association.2) Relation, relationship.3)
Relation, as the meaning of the genitive case.4) Matrimonial alliance;
विक्रियायै न कल्पन्ते संबन्धाः सदनुष्ठिताः (vikriyāyai na kalpante saṃbandhāḥ
sadanuṣṭhitāḥ) Kumārasambhava 6.29,3; जनकानां रघूणां च संबन्धः कस्य न प्रियः
(janakānāṃ raghūṇāṃ ca saṃbandhaḥ kasya na priyaḥ) Uttararāmacarita 1.17. 5)
Friendly connection, friendship; संबन्धमाभाषणपूर्वमाहुः
(saṃbandhamābhāṣaṇapūrvamāhuḥ) R.2.58. sam-bandh + a, 1. Connexion, union,
(asyedam iti sambandho hānau duḥkhena gamyate, The proprietary connection
between them is ascertained only by his grief in losing it) In Sanga Ilakkiyam
it is "KALAVU"; There are two distinctive phases of love-life. They are, 1.
Kalavu (Premarital) 2. Karpu (Marital) So long as the love-affair remains
unknown to the society at large, it is called Kalavu. The close associates of
the lovers are an exception. When it becomes a public affair, it is treated on
a par with marital love. Tradition divides this phase into three aspects,
thematically — the providential meeting of the lovers, their subsequent meeting
in the same place and their meeting in the secret during the day or night with
the aid of their friends. It is through her the lovers gain union. Her major
objective is to hasten the lovers’ wedding. She consoles the heroine when she
becomes sad when the lover is absent or when he is away in a foreign land, in
quest of wealth needed for their wedded life; she serves as the prop for the
heroine. When parents detect symptomatic change in their daughter’s physique or
deportment, they are prone to attribute it to some divine
interference.Normally, the Velan (priest) ascribes it to Lord Murukan and so
the mother arranges for a ritualistic dance namely Veriyattu in their house.
(Even GODs are not spared in such life). In Tamil tradition, the love-life of
ideal pairs is described in five thematic divisions of Uripporul. They are as
follows: 1. Punartal – Secret union of the lovers. 2. Pirital – Separation and
the suffering associated with it.
3. Iruttal – Patient waiting of the heroine for the return of the hero. 4.
Irankal – Feeling of despair of the woman in the absence of the hero. 5. The
love-quarrel between the lovers. Though these aspects are common to all the
Tinas, convention links a particular Uripporul to a particular Tinai or
geographical unit. According to the convention, the following is the
distribution. Thus dating, sambandham aand Kalavu are all denoting the
relationship and living together; if still cannot understand, pl see
SHAKUNTALAM IN OTT; Kalidasan wrote it; Banan wrote it; so many poets. There is
no right and wrong as G says; there is no then and now; there is no 1400 AD and
2200AD. Many Thatha Patti even in this group would have been lovers, lived
secretely and later married or depaarted their ways. Hence NO ONE IS HOLDING AS
RIGHT ANYTHING; IT IS FACT OF LIFE. AGAIN THE LOVE REAL ONE, CHANGES A MAN AND
A WOMAN WHERE SO MAY LITTLE SECRETS , PARTS WAYS TO SACRIFICE A LOT. The
factors of woman and man are distinctive, the ways of the expressions of a male
is direct while that of the female is indirectly expressed; and some might
giigle; some might be perplexed; but sambahndham is that; dating is that;
Kalavu and karpu is that. They never change in decades. The pattis of today or
their mo9thers were calling their husbands by secret sounds because they were
luiving jointly. The 70 to 90s might have had signals like cpffee, choclates
etc words of exchange signalling something even when they were alone.
Relationship gived the sstatus of wife only; parting in relationship avoids the
court proceedings. In both cases, women loses so many things. Kalavum katru
Maraa is the word in tamil, indexed as thieving; no; it is loving. KR IRS 27 5
23
On Fri, 26 May 2023 at 05:22, gopala krishnan <[email protected]> wrote:
Respected sir,
Mostly what you wrote is the output even in the last few decades also
especially in India.
Gopalakrishnan
On Friday, 26 May, 2023 at 03:34:48 pm IST, Rangarajan T.N.C.
<[email protected]> wrote:
I suppose that both know that they are exploring each other with a view for
matrimony and are likely to present an impressive picture which may turn out to
be a disappointment later.
On Friday, 26 May, 2023 at 12:44:22 pm IST, Rajaram Krishnamurthy
<[email protected]> wrote:
Dating is misunderstood by many as out of focus; understanding each other is
dating in English. Having sex is not. If that happens then that will also
determine each other's compatibility. Even after marriage , trying to
understand the spouse is also dating . Era is exclusive. KR IRS
On Fri, 26 May 2023 at 00:07, 'gopala krishnan' via Thatha_Patty
<[email protected]> wrote:
Sir,
For India we were dating in year 70,80,90 does not hold good. Only arranged
marriages. Love marriage?? Dating ????Gopalakrishnan
On Friday, 26 May, 2023 at 09:40:02 am IST, ARR
<[email protected]> wrote:
You will Love this.....😍
THOUGHT YOU WOULD RELATE TO THIS!! SO SHARING IT.
```. *"THE ELDERLY"*
"We were born in the 40-50-60."
"We grew up in the 50-60-70's."
"We studied in the 60-70-80."
"We were dating in the 70-80-90's."
"We got married and discovered the world in the 70-80-90's."
We ventured into the world in the 80-90.
We stabilized in the 2000s.
"We got wiser in the 2010s."
And we are going firmly through 2020's.
"Turns out we've lived through EIGHT different decades..."
"TWO different centuries..."
TWO different millennia...
"We have gone from the telephone with an operator for long-distance calls to
video calls to anywhere in the world, we have gone from slides to You Tube,
from vinyl records to online music, from handwritten letters to email and
WhatsApp."
"From live matches on the radio, to black and white TV, and then to HD TV." We
went to the Video Club and now we watch Netflix.
'We got to know the first computers, punched cards, diskettes and now we have
gigabytes and megabytes in hand on our cell phones or IPad."📹💾📀📞
We wore dog eared shirts and drain pipes & Flares, oxford shoes & Bermuda
shorts, etc.🤸♀️⛹️♂️🧘🏻♂️🏌️♂️
"We dodged infantile paralysis, TB, Polio, meningitis,Swine & Bird flu and now
COVID-19." 🤒🤧😷
We rode skates, tricycles, invented cars, bicycles, mopeds, gasoline or diesel
cars and now we ride hybrids or 100% electric vehicles.🛴🛵🏍️🚘
"Yes, we've been through a lot but what a great life we've had!" 💃🕺
We could be described as “exennials”; people who were born in that world of
the fifties, who had an analog childhood and a digital adulthood.
"We're kind of Yah-i-seen-it-all."
Our generation has literally lived through and witnessed more than any other
in every dimension of life.
It is our generation that has literally adapted to “CHANGE”.
A big round of applause to all the members of a very special generation, which
will be UNIQUE."
A precious and very true message that I received from a friend.
*🏹🏹*TIME DOES NOT STOP* ⌚⌛
_"Life is a task that we brought ourselves to do at home._
_When you look... it's already six in the evening; when you look...
it's already Friday; when you look... the month is over, when you look... the
year is over; when you look... 50, 60 and 70 years have passed!_ _When
you look... we no longer know where our friends are._ _When you look...
we lost the love of our life and now, it's too late to go back._ 🥲
Do not stop doing something you like, due to lack of time. Do not
stop having someone by your side, because your children will soon not be yours,
and you will have to do something with that remaining time, where the only
thing that we are going to miss will be the space that can only be enjoyed with
the usual friends.🤝👬💑
That time that, unfortunately, never returns..."_ *The day is today!*
*WE ARE NO LONGER AT AN AGE TO POSTPONE ANYTHING*
Hopefully you have time to read and then share this message... or else leave
it for *Later* and you will see that you will never share it!
Always together Always united Always Brothers Always friends
Pass it on to your old friends. Don’t leave it for later 😉😉😉```😘🏇🤠
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