Like Jeron, when I realized (about four years ago) that THIS was it, that I was
never going to go back to my "normal" life style, and that I would probably
even get worse, I wanted to die. I couldn't stand it. I gave away most of my
jewelry to my daughter, piled up give away stuff to the Salvation Army,
finalized my will, made funeral arrangements, etc. That's basically what I
did, hoping I wouldn't last too much longer. The best I could say about it, is
that it kept me busy until an MRI sent me to the hospital again with an AVA.
Of course I hoped I'd die for sure during the operation. I didn't.
To go back to those early days, like Jeron, I wrote to this TM support group,
not knowing too much about how it worked. On the subject line, I wrote
"Venting". And oh boy! did I ever vent!
I will never forget the kindness of all the responses I got. Reading them sort
of mobilized my senses, slapped me with a good dose of common sense, and got
me going, where? I don't know... But here I am. Like so many of us, I
survived. No need to go over the pain, the frustrations, the irritations with
doctors who don't know what to do with you, the expensive medications, etc.
The bottom line is that if we survived we had to reach a certain level of
acceptance. Jeron, from the bottom of my heart, I hope that you will too. You
have the support and the understanding of a fabulous support group who care,
and are always willing to listen, just like I do.
Good luck!
Regina
