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Hi David,
I do not necessarily agree with you regarding certain attitudes but still
respect your opinions as such. I see the disagreements on one hand and your
case on the other hand, respectively the possibilities to relieve it, as
separated aspects of your personality.
In the light of your most recent post - which provides a lot of good data
from which one can start with a constructive proposal - I admit that my
previous
post was out of proportion and not really necessary or helpful for you.
I hope you care to read further anyway.
The interesting part(s) of your post(s) for me are those where you
gave some more insight into what you're actually doing regarding your
case. That is the part which I'm willing to acknowledge wholeheartedly.
And it is indeed that part where one can make suggestions in order to
support you in your endeavors toward a more fulfilling life.
In previous posts you mentioned traumatic childhood (not specifically yours
but in rather generalized form. But since it is a recurring issue it may
not
be too far fetched to assume that this is something which you personally
feel
concerned with). In the recent one you mention "being criticized
by your father" and how easily you get restimulated by certain
circumstances
or people.
I think, the more you cultivate the believes that your father's past
conduct is
the reason for present troubles in life, the more this will manifest in the
reality that you currently experience. This may be a good strategy to find
some
quick relief in that it delegates responsibility (= control) over ones own
situation
to an external entity (be it father, mother, god, ... you name it). The
down side
of it is that you strengthen the status quo which you're in and at the same
instant weaken yourself. You lessen your own beingness -> consequently you
reduce your doingness (e.g. loose a job) -> which leaves you with decreased
heavingness. Once that circle is started it tends to accelerate itself. If
one does not pull the brake in time and reverse this cycle one is in dire
threat of surviving well.
Now, what could be done about that? Stop concentrating on the "traumatic"
incidents
of your past. They are traumatic because you have decided for yourself
that they are.
(Yes I know, that's hard to swallow and you do not like it a bit - sorry.)
Actually this is a pretense on your part and therefore a self created
apparency
and not an actuality. You can insist of course saying: "I can not do that"
or "I can't
confront that" or "It's too steep a gradient for me". Ok, so be it, if you
say so it
must be that way. As ironic it may sound, at least it shows that you still
can make
postulates stick.
Well, abuse of children in a family is actually not very rare. That
includes criticism,
evaluations, debasement, application of physical force, sexual harassment
and
misuse, ... to various degrees and facets. Probably we all have done those
things
to others ourselves in other lifetimes, I certainly have.
I did experience some of those things myself but none of it had any big
influence on me
later. On an analytical basis it made me angry about my mother sometimes
but I
decided to take responsibility for those things happening to me. That
really
resolved the matter entirely.
Why can it be that one person allows past events to influence him while
another
having similar past experiences is not impeded by them in life?
One difference may be how the individual assigns significances to the
timeless masses
around him. If it is your game to "make life more interesting" for you, it
sure
is the sensible thing to acquire "traumatic" incidents en mass (pun
intended).
Certainly an interesting game that is. There is no punishment for doing so.
But you sure have to bear the consequences of your decision (or call it
postulate)
thereof. It's not a question of right/wrong. It is not possible to put the
blame
(responsibility) for such a decision on fathers, mothers, teachers, gods,
gurus,
the boss, assholes, ... without making you smaller relative to the
opposing entity.
Would a thetan care if another makes critical remarks or beat him up
(figuratively
speaking)?
The whole idea I'd like to get across here is this:
One is free to see a problem in life (a problem with the mind) as a
negativity
(a negative external circumstance) - or alternatively - just an
attenuation of one's own
ability (something which one owns and thus has a certain amount of control
over it).
[Note: There is no such thing like a complete and utterly lack of a
specific ability.
If there were one then this could only be attained by postulate. But this
one would
violate some basic laws of the MEST universe - on which all of its
inhabitants have
once consciously agreed. It could only be done outside the universe.
Otherwise
it would not align with Logic 6. Corollary it is futile to complain about
the
frame of reference we're operating in.]
Further I ask you to consider the fact that you're obviously aware of
certain childhood incidents (symbols to which you attribute some power
yet). So those
things are located actually in the analytical mind.
(As a side note: I have a personal opinion, on the division of the mind in
a reactive
and analytical part, which is not in line with Hubbard's view. For me
there never
was such a thing like a unconscious mind or a reactive mind. There is only
"The Mind"
which may or may not have parts which do not function properly. Like there
is software
with and without bugs, or cars and cars which have defects but there are
certainly no
reactive cars. Dennis doesn't pay special attention to a reactive mind
either in TROM
(which simply means "The Resolution Of Mind" - up to a certain level you
could say as well
"The Repair of The Mind"). All in all this slight adjustment of view on my
mind did help
me a lot to get more "chummy" with it.)
Now, all of the above has very much to do with personal believes and
attitudes which
are held by the being and are subject to change any time one sees fit.
For many the practical application of the above is found to be difficult or
frustrating to integrate into life.
But you can coax yourself into adopting for yourself more positive and
pro-survival
believes and attitudes by certain techniques which you do apply along a
gradient
scale which fits your case. Look and you'll find out for yourself the
right level
to begin with. The following is meant as examples only - examples which I
make up
inspired from what you revealed in your previous posts. See it as one of
many possibilities
from which you're free to choose, a rough outline of one possible strategy
follows.
Here we go:
As a first exercise write down a list of all the conscious believes
you have. Be as honest with yourself as you can muster. Positive and
negative believes,
attitudes, ... alike. You'll soon recognize that this correlate with
wishes, desires
abilities you have. Avoid to think in terms of disabilities but rather in
terms of
(temporarily - for the sake of a game) attenuated or non-optimum abilities.
Derive a list of your assets (abilities) no matter how small or large they
are.
You can as well do a list of what you _currently_ think of as
"disabilities".
Many of those things may be actually beneficial if just looked upon them
from
an altered angle. A "disability" may under altered conditions or under
repair turn out to be a valuable asset to you. The troubles (barriers) you
pose
for yourself in life have a purpose. The purpose is to overcome them and
explore
the learnings thereof.
The point of the above activity is to strengthen or reestablish your sense
of
self-worth and help you to a brighter outlook towards your present and
future.
Having done that you have got a base to proceed further.
A couple of things that come to mind:
- You may desire to strengthen your third dynamic. From the list you can
see
where your talents and inclinations are lying. If you have troubles with
being
criticized by superiors did you ever consider to be self-employed? What
would you
like to do? Where do you excel? Any talents that lay dormant? Anything
that just
needs a tiny boost in order to be usable? Any dreams or goals you
entertained as
a child but which got lost somehow?
- You may feel a desire to normalize the relationship with your father or
certain family members. If this is not a too horrible thought, then try to
get
in communication with them - on a gradient. If the person(s) have left
their body(s)
already you may be able to get in contact with them in dream state. Just
wish for
a certain contact before you fall asleep. That works very well. (You seem
to have
some experience with that already - another great asset of yours!).
Let's pick some more things you mentioned:
E.g. it seems that your original intention was to do your sessions seated
in a
chair. You found out that this was not practical for you to do in your
current
state of case. So you took a lower gradient and lay down in bed for
processing.
That was a sensible thing to do like crisis-management is the sensible
thing to
do in an emergency. You even report some remarkable wins. VWD!
Never the less, I assume that you still have some desire to get back to a
more
"normal" session set-up. Perhaps even coming up to a more orderly fashion
with
agreed upon schedule, session admin a.s.o.
It simply will improve your progress due to increased efficiency and more
flexibility
regarding your session times and duration.
One way to do that is again by gradients. E.g. you lay in bed (current
state of
affairs which you have successfully mastered it seems). Next one could be,
you put
a pillow under your back and assume a slightly more upright body position.
If you can run processes comfortably you go on with sitting upright in bed
- step
by step. Finally you proceed into placing the body into a chair. And so on
- you got
the idea?
Other example:
Say, you want to deal with "father". Again you do it by gradients. That
means that
you do not mock up your father immediately as he was/is or let the mind
throw incidents
with father at you which you think you can't handle right now. Replace
father with
symbols. E.g. mock up, a stick with a punching ball upon it, or a
skeleton, a little
old man, a dwarf, a (real) anal orifice ;-), ... does not matter. place
the things around
you, change size, colors, texture, ... create many of them, explode them.
burn them,
throw him out of the window, shoot em into the sun, make them disappear,
... what so ever.
Do what ever you want with your creations. Use your fantasy and creative
powers
(that's all a thetan actually has). Just make sure YOU made the things,
YOU manipulated them, YOU're in control of them. When you feel comfortable
at a certain
level of abstraction you make "father" more and more real looking. And so
on.
Flatten any com-lags before you move on.
Invent situations and moving scenes and made up dialogues similar to those
you had
troubles with in real life. Invent circumstances and problems of similar
and even larger
magnitude than those you have or had. Handle them creatively until you can
do it with
ease to your satisfaction and w/o excessive com-lag. Your acceptance and
willingness
to experience similar situations under real-life-conditions will
eventually improve
up to a level where you have control over any restimulative powers in your
mind.
They'll disintegrate layer by layer.
You see there is some similarity to RI and of course feel free to apply
the technique
of time-breaking if whole scenes pop-up. However, I do not recommend that
you provoke
the pop-up of heavily loaded incidents on purpose at this moment.
Why do those techniques work? And why are they not as limited as e.g.
Engram running
by chains or running single charged incidents in a narrative fashion?
It works so well because those routines emphasize on the beings abilities
and ignore the
negative aspects of the case. The theory behind is, that one seeks to
increase a beings
ability rather than trying to erase ones inabilities. The latter can lead
to some spectacular
improvements in a case but leaves a case prone to get worse again after
some time. It
appears almost cruel to leave a being stripped off its aberrations but
still not armored
sufficiently with abilities to create, change, vanish, manipulate energies
and all kind of
facsimiles. It will only be a matter of time until he once again falls
prey to the masses
he inflicts on himself or allows others to inflict on him.
If you work towards greater knowingness (which establishes control and
thus ability), such a
approach can be followed eternally (if you still like to think in terms of
time as we
know it). Thus it is an unlimited process. And further this explains very
conclusively why
cogniting through study improves a case tremendously. I think I've made
more case progress
with study than with porocessing. Nothing beats both done simultaneously.
I have no idea where it would lead one. I guess it does not end (in our
terms) and may
theoretically lead to 'native state'. Which we once had but did not find
too desirable because
it's no fun. That's of course just speculation on my part and currently
not of much practical
relevance. Just could not resist to mention it right now - cause I'm just
fond of that
thought.
However that may be, if one becomes an expert in doing mock-ups they
should sooner or later
be more real to you than MEST. Then they should become even recognizable
to others and
then it will require a couple of more training steps until one can
manipulate MEST at will
in the same fashion as mock-ups. That means that one really can _have_
MEST. You need to _have_
things before you can abandon them. *)
Ok, back in the MEST realms:
You mention that you take walks outside and looking at things. An
excellent practice to
remedy havingness.
I guess it would extremely benefit you to get a thorough run on CCHs by an
auditor who
has them flat on himself. I'd really love to give them to you, but please
understand that it
would be too impractical for me to do a trip to the US just for a couple
of days.
It can not be done by wire because it requires close body control. Do you
see any chance to
find someone in your neighborhood who could do that?
Robin
*) Try the following experiment (this is not a process!):
a) Look at a MEST object and when you have done that stop looking at it.
b) Create a mental image picture which is 100% your own creation - a
unique specimen, so to speak.
c) Make a mock-up of some MEST object which you can easily remember (a
duplicate).
d) Do a mock-up which is something in between b) and c).
(The sequence of this list is arbitrary!)
Now evaluate the quality of a) b) c) d) in terms of "density", "solidity"
or "perceived reality".
Would you say that it is possible to align a) b) c) d) along a scale of
"most solid <--to--> least solid"?
I had a small win on that and found out that mocking up and then getting
rid of certain
MEST objects which I had assigned significances in terms of
"desirable"/"undesirable" becomes
easier. It definitely improved havingness on certain objects which were
somehow "uncool" one way or
other.
Thanks to Colleen for the inspiration to that little experiment. I was
intrigued by
her "TROM Digest, Vol 142, Issue 7 - RI Helps Me Reason Better (The
Resolution of Mind list)".
It had not occurred to me before that I could use RI on re-created (by
mocking up) real possessions
of mine.
On Mon, 12 Sep 2016 14:00:03 +0200, <trom-requ...@lists.newciv.org> wrote:
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Today's Topics:
1. Re: Question for David P. RE Be-Do-Have
(The Resolution of Mind list)
2. RE The Gordon Ramsey Video clip (The Resolution of Mind list)
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Message: 1
Date: Sun, 11 Sep 2016 14:20:03 -0700
From: The Resolution of Mind list <trom@lists.newciv.org>
To: trom@lists.newciv.org
Subject: Re: [TROM1] Question for David P. RE Be-Do-Have
Message-ID: <mailman.4731.1473628789.1326.t...@lists.newciv.org>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Hi David
Well Done on timebreaking the present time situation.
It's good to hear you are making progress in eliminating your mind.
Sincerely
Pete McLaughlin
Sent from my iPad
On Sep 11, 2016, at 11:39 AM, The Resolution of Mind list
<trom@lists.newciv.org> wrote:
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Colleen:
Quote: My question for you is how are you currently processing
be-do-have and what results are you seeing?
For about three years now, I have been doing level three.
I couldn't do it sitting in my chair, because I would pass out.
So I found out that I could do it lying in bed.
I would do it before falling asleep if I was not too tired, or more so
when I wake up in the middle of the night, and do it until I fell
asleep again, which was usually not too long.
I just alternately punched in:
Prevented from being, (must be- can't be)
Prevented from doing, (must do-can't do)
Prevented from having. (must have- can't have)
And other issues (junior goals).
Even abuse (degrade).
I had no trouble (that I am aware of) running such non life goal.
And I would scan and time break what ever pictures came up.
If I did not have enough energy to time break, (which is/ was usually
the case), I would just hold them in view and make them more
intense, get into them more, or what ever until they run flat.
I would usually fall asleep before they run flat.
My mind would often continue to process while I slept.
During the day, I would occasionally go for walks and look at things
near and far.
My mind is now still.
I have been running L4 for a few days now, and I have a hard time
finding pictures.
I know there is still lots there somewhere.
I still easily get restimulated, especially in conflicting situations
with assholes and idiots (SPs) .
I still have lots of catatonia and cataplexy and other disorders.
I have engrams on work from a very young age, by being always scolded
to work and being criticized while working by my dad.
Work is restimulating especially when the boss gets angry for some
reason.
Facsimilies would come up and overwhelm me into paralysis (cataplexy
and catatonia) and before long I was no more good on that job and would
get fired or had to quit.
That has been my life story.
Last week I was helping someone do some work on his house and he was in
a bad mood one day and got angry at me for no good reason.
Traumatic pictures came up.
I was able to time break them in a couple of minutes and then was not
overly bothered by them.
I kept my cool. I stayed in the game quite well.
This never happened like that before.
I was pretty impressed with myself.
That is just like Dennis says in the book.
Now I think it is mostly "other(s)" postulates left.
L5 is another story.
I am working on it.
David
On Sun, Sep 11, 2016 at 1:01 PM, The Resolution of Mind list
<trom@lists.newciv.org> wrote:
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Hi Colleen
Thanks for the video clip of Gordon Ramsey. He did not understand
what the meditation was for. He was not ready to let go of his
compulsive games playing.
Very good example.
Keep on TROMing
Pete Mclaughlin
Sent from my iPad
On Sep 11, 2016, at 9:13 AM, The Resolution of Mind list
<trom@lists.newciv.org> wrote:
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Hello, DavidP (Note: there are two other Davids on this list),
Colleen here. Thank you for bringing up be-do-have. There was another
Trommer who gave it a lot of importance and processed it using Level
4 commands. BTW, did you know "To Have" is listed as a junior goals
package?
Did you know that Hubbard said to resolve be-do-have limitations
starting first with "To Have"? For example, what is important for
you re To Have, then, using reason, what would one have to do in
order to have that, and then what would one have to be in order to do
that?
That is from Hubbard...it was about having. Hubbard could just as
well have said the same thing about "To Know". One wants to know
something/someone, so what would they need to do in order to achieve
that, and then what would they need to present themselves as being in
order to do that? So, isn't to-have really to-know?
I recall those Old Testament (King James version) stories where a man
would get married and then he would enter the tent and "know" his
wife, whereas today we might say "have" or something else, but I
think the King James translation was a more accurate higher truth
than they may have realized.
My question for you is how are you currently processing be-do-have
and what results are you seeing?
For myself, "To Have", or "must have" (as a compulsion) is part of my
"Must Know" case, i.e., I must have it so I can know it, experience
it. I must have a comm line with that person so that I can know
them/experience whatever effects they are creating; so best to find
someone who wants to be known [for that] so the relationship can be
complementary. For example I have a complementary relationship with a
"must know" person who is very happy with me as long as I am feeding
them good data regarding subjects of their interest, or latest
problem to solve.
As for "To Be", wouldn't that correspond with Dennis' junior
universes? For example, to be a fisherman, and getting stuck in that
universe. John Galusha's Idenics process is one way to expand ability
to be. Dennis says the universe is life and postulates, and an
identity is some postulates rigged together.
I agree with you that - in spite of its utter simplicity and
effectiveness - Level Two is a tough gradient for the complicated
minds on this planet. If you click on this video and forward to 18:00
you will get a demo of what I'm talking about:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IY2Nc6JPBW8. If the link gets
scrubbed google Gordon Ramsey in Thailand and go to the 18:00 mark.
It's not only Trom, it's ALL CLEARING PRACTICES that compulsive /
complicated / noisy / egoic minds run away from.
When a person gets down to their last game leg (as they see it) then
they might start self-enquiring, searching for an end to suffering,
and the craziness, and possibly for someone to help them resolve
their mental issues.
I am postulating the best outcome for you.
colleen
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Message: 2
Date: Sun, 11 Sep 2016 22:05:23 -0400
From: The Resolution of Mind list <trom@lists.newciv.org>
To: trom@lists.newciv.org
Subject: [TROM1] RE The Gordon Ramsey Video clip
Message-ID: <mailman.4788.1473645913.1326.t...@lists.newciv.org>
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Hello, Pete, many thanks and much appreciation for your determination to
gather together the Trom materials, even going to Australia to visit his
wife, and now continuing to keep it all together on the internet and in
book form.
RE Gordon Ramsey, he is a famous chef and a multi-millionaire with a
known
heroin problem, which I do not know if he has resolved that or not. He
has
had to commit overts against himself and others to be allowed to be made
famous as he is now. Perhaps if the peaceful monk had asked him to "Walk
to that wall .... thank you ..." ?
There is the joy of competency - when handling a near psychotic - or
truly
psychotic - spiritual being is like poetry in motion, instead of our
usual
responses.
Hubbard exhibited that level of artful competency when he ran his simple
little process on me last lifetime near the end of my hugely
irresponsible
life last lifetime, and that's largely why I am here now and finally able
to take responsibility for my suffering, and to see everything in a new
light... with the help of some of my spiritual brothers and sisters,
whether they intended it or not. The bottom line was me asking myself the
"right" questions, postulating a certain path (for me) to "Native State".
How does one get command power over their own mind when they have none?
Well, true, there are no absolutes. Hubbard's answer was the CCH's,
simple
TRs courses, auditing of engramic pasts with a trained auditor, the
Grades,
co-auditing Dianetics, Self-analysis, and the Purif. Dennis began his
career co-auditing Dianetics, and rebooted himself doing RI and Level
Two.
Even if one does not have certainty of themselves they can have certainty
of their chosen nirvanic path.
colleen
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