This reminds me of a story going round the 'net a few years ago. It's credibility is doubtful but it's hilarious. Here it is, reposted (and made work friendly) from the infamous "Arborior's IRC logs" (which are not safe for work):
<Hiroe> he was dressed as a big devil <Hiroe> like, HUGE costume <Hiroe> 8-foot lizard wings, giant horns on the head <Hiroe> at some anime con in california <Hiroe> they were double booked with a southern Baptist group in the same hotel <Hiroe> he's riding the elevator down to the con space <Hiroe> doors open, little old baptist woman standing there <Hiroe> he just says "Going Down" in his best evil voice -----Original Message----- From: Action Request System discussion list(ARSList) [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of Will Du Chene Sent: Friday, May 25, 2007 7:58 AM To: arslist@ARSLIST.ORG Subject: Re: OT:Humor - 50 Fun Things to Do in an Elevator True story: While on a tour of the Sudan Mines in Tower, Minnesota, a ride in a mining elevator is necessary to descend the 1/2 mile underground to the level where the tour begins. The elevator rocks back and forth, and the door is somewhat questionable. The elevator is also sloped back at an angle. As the packed elevator is in motion, rocking and swaying, and as the levels fly by, a certain passenger (who was in front of the rest) looked at the others who are obviously more than a bit uneasy with the ride and exclaimed loudly while jumping up and down, "Wwwhhhooo Hhhooo! We are on an express elevator straight to hell - Goin' Down!" One of the other passengers almost passed out, while most of others seemed to turn ghostly white... I figured that was the most that I could get away with without getting mobbed. :-) Gidd wrote: > ** > - Make racing car noises when anyone gets on or off. > > - Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to > other passengers. > > - Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut > up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!" > > - Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly. > > - Sell Girl Scout cookies. > > - On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the > elevator. > > - Shave. > > - Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: > "Got enough air in there?" > > - Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours > upside-down. > > - Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without > getting off. > > - When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors > open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves. > > - Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!" > > - Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask > them to call you Admiral. > > - One word: Flatulence! > > - On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay > open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at > the bottom. > > - Do Tai Chi exercises. > > - Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and announce: > "I've got new socks on!" > > - When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not > now, damn motion sickness!" > > - Give religious tracts to each passenger. > > - Meow occassionally. > > - Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose. > > - Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "0ops!" > > - Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected. > > - Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons. > > - Holler "Chocks away!" whenever the elevator descends. > > - Walk on with a box that says "human head" on the side. > > - Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of > THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator. > > - If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holier "Bad touch!" > > - Leave a box between the doors. > > - Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them. > > - Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it. > > - Start a sing-along. > > - When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?" > > - Play the harmonica. > > - Shadow box. > > - Say "Ding!" at each floor. > > - Lean against the button panel. > > - Say " wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons. > > - Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope. > > - Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to other > passengers that this is your "personal space." > > - Bring a chair along. > > - Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha > in muhmouf?" > > - Blow spit bubbles. > > - Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings. > > - Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body." > > - Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively. > > - Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button. > > - Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers. > > - Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger." > > - Scatter powertools around your feet and scream into a radio, "I'M > NOT FINISHED YET! THE CABLE ONLY HAS ONE SCREW!!!" > > Regards...Gidd > > __20060125_______________________This posting was submitted with HTML > in it___ ________________________________________________________________________ _______ UNSUBSCRIBE or access ARSlist Archives at www.arslist.org ARSlist:"Where the Answers Are" _______________________________________________________________________________ UNSUBSCRIBE or access ARSlist Archives at www.arslist.org ARSlist:"Where the Answers Are"
