--- Reggie Bautista <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > Michael Harney wrote: > > >I have been informed today that I have been plonked by one of the > >listmembers. Which listmember is irrelivant. > [snip] > >If enough people express a > >desire for me to leave I will do so and never return. The last thing I > >want > >is to make people uncomfortable. > > I know you've already decided to stick around (yay!) but I want to throw in > > my US $0.02. > > It seems there are people on this list (and we probably all do it to some > extent) who have certain hot-button issues where they don't react to the > actual post, but instead react to the stereotype they have in their mind > about certain kinds of posters. For example, when anyone posts anything > about religion, The Fool and William Goodall react as if that person was > posting from a religious extremest perspective, instead of reading what the > > poster actually wrote. Not all religious people are extremists and we > certainly don't all believe the same things. In the past I've seen some > people on this list who are politically far-left who seem to treat anyone > to > the right of them as a conservative extremist, and I've seen some who are > far-right treat anyone to the left of them as a liberal extremist. >
Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE does this. Even Dr. Brin does this sometimes. Of course some people do it more than others. It's a real hot button for me. I tend to appear aggressive when someone has done this to me. First I try and explain the difference, but usually the nuance is unimportant to them. Or they just don't get it. I mean, they would have to be actually listening, and caring what I was saying to get it, and at that point they usually aren't, and don't. Then I get into a meta discussion and try to explain the very situation we are now discussing. (recursive isn't it) Unfortunately that usually results in them thinking that I am personally attacking them. They respond by personally attacking, and then -I- get aggressive. The thing is -they- usually would have thought I was being aggressive from the get-go. To them, I made it into a "fight". To me they did. I like to call this conversational monad a communicative fixed-point impedance mismatch. Really though, I wish this were a well known concept and their was a good name for it. Then people could get out of that particular loop by simply naming the instance and moving on. It might become part of on-(and off)-line etiquette. "Hay, your FPIMing me!" "Oh I'm sorry, are you sure?" "Yes I am saying (*.****) and you are FPIMing that I am saying something more (*)." "I fail to see the difference, -> -> -> -> what is it?" <- <- <- <- .... ah! if only. Jan non-linear thinking maru ===== _________________________________________________ Jan William Coffey _________________________________________________ __________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? Yahoo! Calendar - Free online calendar with sync to Outlook(TM). http://calendar.yahoo.com _______________________________________________ http://www.mccmedia.com/mailman/listinfo/brin-l