On 16 March 2012 23:00, SF Markus Elfring <[email protected]> wrote:
>> This is not the first time I am curious, this time I'll ask.
>> When you put phrases lie "would you like to do XYZ" what it actually mean?
>
> This my style to check the corresponding change acceptance for my
> suggestions.

I have also for a long time reacted to this form of asking. I think
you would be much better off by being more direct and assertive in your
communication.

In general using I-statements is good, and I would like to suggest that
you start phrasing your questions like "I would like XYZ because ...",
"I think XYZ is a good idea/nice feature because ...", etc instead and
completely avoid the "would you like to XYZ" style.

By being so indirect, I believe you make it difficult for you self in
getting your intentions across by almost hiding what _you_ specifically
want and what problem are you trying to solve.

And providing reasons or explanations for why together with your
questions/suggestions would help a lot. Several times I have absolutely
no idea of why you ask the things you are asking about in your postings.

Having a problem clearly defined does wonder to problem solving.
In case the initial suggested solution is not optimal or will not work
then other solutions might be supplied when people know what the problem
is. By not providing a reason/background when asking, I think you are
making it more difficult for others to help you.


BR Håkon Løvdal
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