The stories of healing that are remembered from “childhood” are not so
many. My parents were raising children for the entirety of my youth
so they did not have ample time to tell stories about what healing
meant.
there is one exception to this rule. My mom, who was brought up in
an orthodox Catholic household where the word of “God” was used to
explain the reason why mishaps occurred and to validate the need for
faith during the times of trial during life. As a child “Mom” would
talk about her inherent responsibilty to stay true to her faith to
make sure she did not go to hell. She would tell stories about
attending catholic grammer and middle school where she nuns “teachers”
would use threats of heaven and hell to make sure the children
“students” did not misbehave. From what she said, corporal punishment
was not unheard of.
As a son of the is woman for a time in my life I took these stories
(meaning) literally and consequently responded with fear because of
innocence or ignorance that was inherent in my age. With the passing
of “time” coupled with the growth of my own personal experience of
life I began to challenge the presumption that evil and good were
clear cut and “easily” defined. Initially this lead me into direct
verbal conflict with my mother and her inherited perspectives. As a
youth growing up in these conditions, the stress was palatable. When
I took the time to look around at the relationships between my mother
and the rest of the siblings it was easy to see that the others were
suffering as well.
During the time of middle school and high school there was a great
deal of conflict between my parents and their children. This was due
in part to a stark difference in approach to living between the
household I grew up and the environment that I understood to be
society (home town).
The situation came to a head during the time of the sacrament of
confirmation. I choose not to be confirmed. There were many battles
fought over this issue but ultimately I was not forced to get
confirmed: I was given the choice.
In the time that followed the confrontations, changes began to occur
in the dynamics of the relationships between the people in my family
but also the relationships the individuals had with the
concept’s of right and wrong. This breaking of the totalitarian
strangle hold shock the family to it’s roots in a positive manner.
All the people were set free in a manner of speaking, Like the dam
that has broken to release the water (energy) to bring life to those
parts of us that had been given no attention. See this is only part of
the scenario, the other half of it is that the development of means to
express the pent up energy was what needed to be established because
the “frustration” needed a mean to be transformed into joy.
By Mom releasing her will so that her children could leave the
congregation on their own accord, all of us were given the opportunity
to find our own ways in the world to realize for our selves what a
good citizen was and is, and to be an asset to what ever community we
wound find ourselves being a part of. The healing that came out of
the whole situation was that my mother had chose to let go of the
views that were inhibiting her growth so that she could live in manner
that was and is closer to who she was and is. Her children by these
sequence of events were given permission and the responsibility to
explore life to constantly emerge from moment to moment into a fuller
expression of who they were and are.
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