On Jan 29, 2009, at 1:58 PM, Marek Reavis wrote:
What Edg pointed out earlier, however, is true for all of us, I
feel. As primates we are quick to recognize distinctions and if we
have been trained (by education or experience) to associate certain
differences with "bad", then it's understandable that we act and talk
the way we do around "others".
One of the things that I find most rewarding about my work is that,
at times, I get to be present when a client comes to a realization
about "others" where he/she can draw a relationship between a group
that they hate and themselves. I'm dealing right now with a young
man who is in a world of trouble (after a lifetime of trouble and
abuse) who, the last time he was in prison, abandoned his skinhead
affiliations by refusing to stab a black inmate on the yard, because
a black psychologist had shown him compassion and helped him gain
insight during counseling sessions with him.
Among other things, his refusal to follow orders means that when he
goes back to prison he will always be in PC (protective custody away
from the general population and essentially confined 23 hours a
day). The operative phrase is "blood in, blood out". Initiation
into any of these groups (whether in prison or on the outs) involves
the spilling of blood (the initiate's or someone else's -- or both),
and refusal to abide by the group's code or orders from an authority
within the group means that there is a lifetime contract on the
violator's life.
It wasn't an easy choice for him to make. His tattoos and appearance
identify him indelibly as a member of a group that he no longer
identifies with and can never rejoin. He is an outcast in every
possible sense of the term, hated (not necessarily without good
reason) by all, and accepted by none. He has told me on more than
one occasion how much he appreciates the work I do for him, and I
consider that high praise and good reward for my time.
Great story, Marek, thanks! Your work must be very fulfilling.
Sal
