I went into the nursing room about 1:30 am
to feed Bella and to make sure that all the babies are doing ok… as I was
feeding Bella, I noticed one of the babies was sleeping her mouth open, and
nose sounded stuffy --- so I checked her temperature and it was lower than
other babies and I checked her weight and was much less than others and seemed
that she lost some weight or at least has not gained for the last day or two..
so I freaked out.. and I started warming her by wrapping her in wool and put
her right by my stomach so that she could be gradually warmed up as the book
said it’s danger to warm a chilled baby too quickly using a head pad..
and the book said that I should give some water/sugar and not to give any
formula to a chilled baby.. and I did .. and soon after I did, she stopped breathing
in a few minutes.. I think I choker her with water.. I am so ignorant, and
stupid and cruel. Bella was still nursing her, and I should have just put
her back with Bella once I warmed her a little bit without trying to give any
water – I was not careful when giving her water and probably gave her
more than she could handle at a time. Truth is we don’t know exactly what
would have happened to her, but one thing I know that she did not die when she
did if I did not do what I did.. she looked healthy, I think she just got
chilled because I left a window open a little because Bella was hot ---- I cannot bring her back, but right now I
feel that I need to feel this pain – I keep remembering her little meow
and how I should have just put her back with her mama trust that her mama knows
better than I do.. it’s too much of price to pay.. I had to take her life
away to realize how stupid I am – I am sorry, you guys, I am just so sad
and am just so angry at myself for carelessness and don’t know what to do
and I just miss her so very much.. From:
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
[mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On
Behalf Of Sherry DeHaan Hideyo,I know you did not hurt the baby on
purpose.What happened?? You are a great mom to all the animals you help.I know
how it feel to hurt a small animal and cause its death,it is horrible,I still
get a stomache ache when I think about it and it happened over 20 years ago Hi, everyone, today is one of the saddest day of my life –
one of Bella’s babies died this morning around 2 am and I think I caused
her to die. I am just too upset about what happened. But, I wanted to
help, but instead I killed her. She was only 10 days old and she did not
even get to open her eyes. All I know was that it was definitely not her
time to go yet. But I killed her. I am so mad at myself and am just
going insane from a grief of losing her. I was supposed to protect Bella
and her babies and not to hurt them. I could still hear her meow right
before she stopped breathing.. I am such a ignorant and stupid, I should just
let Bella who knows what she is doing to continue to care for her. I did not event get to name her.. Bella is very sad and does not
know what happened – it’s all my fault – everyone please
please pray that the little baby angel is at heaven and comes back as a new
life very very soon and have much happiness in her new life – and I am
very sure that most of you know how this feels. It’s sad enough to
lose her, but it’s unbearable to know that you are the who killed an
innocent life and she was not ready to go. Please do not make me feel better as I feel that it’s sinful
to feel better – she is gone, there is nothing I can do about it, but I
just cannot stop crying and am just so angry myself and feel so badly for the
baby and Bella – Thank you for all your prayers for the baby – Hideyo How low will we go? Check out
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- RE: My Bella's baby died Hideyo Yamamoto
- Re: My Bella's baby died Nina
- Re: My Bella's baby died Barb Moermond
- Re: My Bella's baby died Belinda
- RE: My Bella's baby died catatonya
- Re: My Bella's baby died Gloria B. Lane
- To Hideyo wendy
- RE: My Bella's baby died Kat
- RE: My Bella's baby died Hideyo Yamamoto
- Re: My Bella's baby died Lomaxturtle
- Re: My Bella's baby died Terri Brown