I know this conversation kinda stopped a couple weeks ago, but I want to
throw into the ring that HHVM already has a syntax for return type hinting
and it'd be awesome if we (with my PHP hat on) brought the two
implementations together rather than take them further apart.

In HHVM's case a function might look something like:

function foo(SomeClass $bar, int $baz) : bool {

}

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