Stewart, I both agree and disagree. It is a matter of the intent.
> b) Altering someone's name into some sort of sarcastic nickname, > e.g. MO for Matanya Ophee, Uncle Albert for Albert Reyerman, and St. > McCoy for me. > > Calling someone by a name other than their correct name is puerile, > and has the opposite effect from the one intended. Name-calling is > designed to hurt someone by making fun of them, but it is inevitably > the name-caller who ends up looking foolish, because it reflects the > paucity of his thought. It is all very tiresome, and I do wish it > would stop. > I referred to you as Stew one time, and you corrected me. Point well taken. But my name is Jonathan and I prefer to be called Jon (or Murph by those I know well - in fact I sign differently to close friends and those who are friends but less close). I wrote Matthias and addressed him as "Mat", before I was aware that Europeans don't take the familiar as easily as Americans do. But his reaction was "I rather enjoy that". It is an individual thing, and the individual desires should be respected. So I agree that it is puerile to use a name other than the accepted one, but the accepted one may be a nickname rather than the "correct" one if the purpose is well intended. There is no rule except manners, and the form of address should be dictated by the desire of the addressee. If you want to call me Uncle Murph with a "tongue in cheek" reference to my avuncular pontification I would find it amusing, but if you do it with spite then I will be annoyed. A classic line from western movies is "When you say that Mister, smile". It is a misquote of a fine and definitive novel of the difference of the culture of the American West and the older East Coast. The Virginian (Owen Wister, last edition 1902), a story of an Easterner being escorted west for his health by a cowboy originally from Virginia. That line came during a poker game where the Virginian was challenged - Trampas spoke "You bet, you son of a bitch". The Virginian lays his pistol on the table and says "When you call me that, smile". The amazement of the Easterner comes because just a while before an old friend had called the Virginian "You old son of a bitch" and he was surprised there was no reaction to these "fighting words". OK, too much exposition, but I recommend the original book. It is an exercise in naivite and has to be read as a creature of its time, but many of the cliches of modern life come from it - and the author's effort to explain the culture of the American west to the American east is a first (the predecessors were the "penny dreadfuls" glorifying Buffalo Bill and other, the Buntlines). The point is that there is no insult if there is no intent, and that even the most mannerly language can convey insult if the intent is there. Best, Jon, (Murph), (Jonathan W. Murphy), (or anything else meant with good will).
