Hi Alistair, Thanks for your interesting thoughts. After meditating upon them, I think that either you are wrong, or you are so right that I am deluding myself!
I we disagree, it may only be on the definition of the word "manipulation", however. > When I was in my 20s and a hardware engineer, it was > explained to me many times by many people that > salesmanship and personal manipulation goes on all > day long in all aspects of our lives, from dating, > holding a marriage together, to getting a job and > getting a raise, to convincing other people that our > ideas are sound or better. I agree that all these are a form of salesmanship. I don't agree that that requires manipulation, in the sense of "influence by deceipt". > As engineers, we find this uncomfortable and also > unfamiliar: "I didn't sign up for this sales stuff." > (I have said the same myself on many occasions). Well, I have not ever said or thought that. I have always been happy to participate in sales work. I have done many demos, participated in trade shows, seminars, I even wear a tie on many occasions. I /like/ working closely with current or potential customers. I am shy and self-conscious, and uncomfortable about meeting people. However, I am intellectually comfortable with the idea, and I would therefore like to get better at it and be more relaxed. I am intellectually uncomfortable about lying and deceipt. I don't want to learn to do it. In fact I have plenty of work learn to avoid unintentional misunderstandings, which I do care about. > The word "should" or "shouldn't" implies "even the > world tells me that my belief about it is false, I > hang onto it anyway." Which is the same as saying, "I > have this sneaky suspicion (or I actually know) that > I am wrong, but I don't want to face it yet." I believe honest salesmanship is possible in the areas like the ones you mention, because I have seen it work. I have never, however, been an actual business salesman, so I was being cautious about whether my personal experience can be extrapolated to that area. > We could all be more effective engineers if we > mastered the sales stuff and recognized that we and > when we manipulate people ... and yet we don't go > through the discomfort and unfamiliarity to learn it. We could all be more effective engineers, husbands, fathers or whatever if we mastered open, honest, communication. I don't think deceipt would get me anywhere I want to go. > So which is it that you are not interested in: > making more money, being more effective, or having > more impact with your ideas? I am interested in all of those, as long as I can look back on how I achieved them without feeling ashamed. Regards, Dominic Williams http://www.dominicwilliams.net ---- To Post a message, send it to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] To Unsubscribe, send a blank message to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] ad-free courtesy of objectmentor.com Yahoo! Groups Links <*> To visit your group on the web, go to: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/extremeprogramming/ <*> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] <*> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to: http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
