Dear Lieve
I was only this morning at a beautiful birth of a stillborn baby girl -
perfect in every way, looking so much like her mother! How things happen at
this time are crucial for the parents - they have SO MUCH to do - in their
hearts, their souls, their lives, their families..... a word, an action can
have such an influence on this for them.  I am a midwife and this is part of
life - and death - I am close to you at this time, as are the parents I was
with this morning. I do not have the words at this time, but I feel so much
for this family - so far away in distance, but so close in thought and heart
and life!
Love to you and them - Lynne
----- Original Message -----
From: "Lieve Huybrechts" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Thursday, March 20, 2003 8:48 AM
Subject: [ozmidwifery] When birth and death come together


> Dear friends,
>
> Thank you all for the nice replys and warmfull thoughts for me and the
> family.
> I will tell you now what followed.
>
> Monday morning Lars was still very alive and alert. He drank several times
> during the night, pied, made stools, had the hickup, was sneezing, in one
> word, he did all a healthy child does.
> The mother hardly dared to close her eyes to sleep, afraid of missing some
> moments. The baby never left the arms of his parents.
> So in the morning we had a talk. We all had questions about how it will
> continue, how much time do we have, how will he die...
> So the parents decided to go to the university hospital to have an
> ultrasound of the heart. They made clear to the docter that they just
wanted
> an ultrasound and then return home to decide what options were for them.
> The ultrasound confirmed the previous diagnosis: no left part of the
heart,
> severe of the aorta  and when the ductus of Botalli closes, the baby will
go
> in acidosis, coma and die. They predicted 24 to 48 hours to live.
> The familie came home again. They made pictures and video of the baby.
Lars
> never left their arms. They called some friends and told them about the
> birth and had visitors. But also we did a lot of talking, laughing and
> crying.
> 24 hours passed, 48 hours passed. Lars is now more then 72 hours and still
a
> perfect child. He had his first bath today together with his mother and
> enjoyed it a lot. He is feeding well, has already breastfeeding stools and
> is very alert.
> He beated all the prognoses about lifetime. So we don't know anything
about
> how long.
>
> Emotions are strange, we know there is no hope for long time, but we don't
> know how long. The parents enjoy the baby, but also fear the moment they
> have to let him go.
> We are prepared, but it's so absurd when you see Lars, he is so alive.
> The parents hoped that he would live long enough to see his eyes open, the
> mother hoped for some moments on the breast. Now they got already so much.
> They feel privileged and very happy, but grieve is so close. Laughter and
> tears go hand in hand.
> What will the futur bring???
>
> Warm greetings
> Lieve
>
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