>> asking nicely goes a long way. this summer, passing heathrow (afaik 
notorious 
>for refusing this),
>> all my film was hand inspected.
>
>For those of you who may not have English as their first language, the
>correct way to ask for this is:
>
>"Hello Officer. I am from <insert name of country here>. May I have a
>hand job please?"

Followed by:

"My hovercraft is full of eels"

and

"My nipples explode with delight"

and

"Would you like to come back to my place, bouncy, bouncy??"

LOL

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