Re: [QUAD-L] looking for inter-enabled couples
I think this is a great idea Ben. I seem to remember that New Mobility did the same thing 4-5 years ago with much success. Good Luck with the project. Best Wishes In a message dated 6/19/2014 2:45:22 P.M. Central Daylight Time, bmatt...@earthlink.net writes: Hi everyone – For a book about inter-enabled couples (long-term relationships in which one member has a permanent disability and the other doesn't), I'm looking for sources to interview by phone and/or email. Ideally, both members of the relationship would participate, but at this point I'd be happy to interview individuals too, if necessary. Please note that I'm a quad myself, though from a genetic neurological disability, not a SCI, and I've been married to a nondisabled woman for 24 years. Issues I hope to explore include: dating caregiving reactions from your parents and friends dividing household chores parenting aging and changing health Thanks very much in advance. And please feel free to share this wherever appropriate. I think there is a good book here, and so does my agent, but I need to gather enough info to put together a solid pitch for publishers. Best, Ben __ BEN MATTLIN _www.BenMattlin.com_ (http://www.benmattlin.com/) _www.MiracleBoyGrowsUp.com_ (http://www.miracleboygrowsup.com/)
Re: [QUAD-L] looking for inter-enabled couples
Hi Ben, I might be able to help. I'm a c5 quad and been with same able-bodied woman for 13 years. Hit us up if you want a interview. Thanks, Donald c5 23 years post. On Friday, June 20, 2014 8:11 AM, wheelch...@aol.com wheelch...@aol.com wrote: I think this is a great idea Ben. I seem to remember that New Mobility did the same thing 4-5 years ago with much success. Good Luck with the project. Best Wishes In a message dated 6/19/2014 2:45:22 P.M. Central Daylight Time, bmatt...@earthlink.net writes: Hi everyone – For a book about inter-enabled couples (long-term relationships in which one member has a permanent disability and the other doesn't), I'm looking for sources to interview by phone and/or email. Ideally, both members of the relationship would participate, but at this point I'd be happy to interview individuals too, if necessary. Please note that I'm a quad myself, though from a genetic neurological disability, not a SCI, and I've been married to a nondisabled woman for 24 years. Issues I hope to explore include: dating caregiving reactions from your parents and friends dividing household chores parenting aging and changing health Thanks very much in advance. And please feel free to share this wherever appropriate. I think there is a good book here, and so does my agent, but I need to gather enough info to put together a solid pitch for publishers. Best, Ben __ BEN MATTLIN http://www.benmattlin.com/ http://www.miracleboygrowsup.com/
[QUAD-L] Quadriplegics and percentages.......also marriage
I read about quad stuff all the time and a fact found interesting was 30 percent of quadriplegics never accept or learn to deal with their injury. What that means is they essentially survive. When I was in court the experts that set up care packages for quads told me I would be dead in 20 yrs. Its clear im going to make them a liar on that. One more thing I would like to say about being married and a quad. I know several quads that either were married at the time of injury or got married after. I have had the opportunity to marry twice since my injury myself but held up. What stopped me from getting married was I saw the writing on the wall that I was going to be controlled, taken advantage of and set up potentially for a cycle of abuse. Once you leave your family and get married your potential marriage partner can easily take your social security money, put you in a room and slowly put you exactly where they want. Once you get in such a situation it can be hard to get out of. Basically some of these slick people out there get you to burn your family ties , move you away and the only way out then is to go to a nursing home and start from scratch. Sure there are some out there that have a legitimate marriage that works, but many are fooling themselves or not telling the truth. When someone knows you need them for some sort of care most people will abuse that in some way or another. You have to be very careful as a disabled individual and marriage. Being lonely sometimes is better than living with a person that's found an angle to get by and you are it. Ron
