On Tue, Aug 31, 2004 at 12:48:34PM -0600, Andrew Jorgensen wrote:
> Perhaps an agnostic is agnostic because he's afraid of death (at which
> point he'll find out, won't he)

Obligatory South Park reference:

[Hell, waiting area. Many souls are there, wondering where they are,
and why.]

Stephen: Where, where am I?

Man: Where are we?

Man 2: No doubt about it...

Woman: What's happening??

Man 3: Oooooooooh!

Speaker: Hello, newcomers, and welcome. Can everybody hear me?  [taps
the mic a few times] Hello? Can everybuh-? Okay. [the crowd quiets
down] Uh, I'm the hell director. Uh, it looks like we have about 8,615
of you newbies today, and for those of you who are a little confused,
uh, you are dead, and this is hell, so, abandon all hope and uh yada
yada yada. Uh, we are now going to start the orientation process,
which will last about-

Man 4: Hey, wait a minute, I shouldn't be here. I wa a totally strict
and devout Protestant! I thought we went to heaven!

Hell Director: Yes, well I'm afraid you were wrong.

Soldier: I was a practicing Jehovah's Witness.

Hell Director: Uh, you picked the wrong religion as well.

Man 5: Well, who was right? Who gets into heaven?

Hell Director: I'm afraid it was the Mormons. Yes, the Mormons were
the correct answer.

Crowd: [disappointed] Awww.

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