So, my memory is still not 100% clear on this one but I think we're honing in on why I don't flatten.... If the relationship is not flattened then I have the option of not using addObjectToBothSides if I know I am doing an insert and then discarding the EO (i.e. I don't care about keeping my object graph consistent right now). It means I can avoid faulting in a whole slew of stuff when I know I don't need it.
This seems right to me, yeah. That said, my standard approach is that if the relationship is too big to fault, then I don't model it. It's VERY rare that I have the relationship modeled but don't want the graph in sync. This same topic came up in the discussions of automatic inverse relationship updating in Wonder, actually.

ms
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