On Sun, Jun 15, 2014 at 10:43 AM, Pete Forsyth <petefors...@gmail.com> wrote:
> All: > > In other Wikimedia-related forums, recent discussions have focused on some > (alleged) comments at the Wiki Conference in New York. Apparently, some > people suggested that the WMF's Executive Director should "dump" her > significant other.[1] Many have expressed outrage about this. (For > background, see this blog post from May 30.[2] What's described there has > continued to play out in the weeks since, just not on this list.) > > I think we all share a concern about the amount of "drama" in our > community-wide discussions. Expressing outrage (even though it's sometimes > appropriate and necessary) can often be the fuel of "drama" -- and I think > it's important to explore what's been going on in relation to that > principle. So, a couple points: > > Point #1: > Gossiping about personal relationships, including points like who should > dump whom, is totally normal behavior in small group conversation. > > Not outrageous -- totally normal behavior. In pretty much every social > context I've ever experienced. > > I think that much is easily enough to explain and excuse any of the > comments people are complaining about. But in this case, there's of course > more going on: > > Point #2: > The ED of the WMF can influence the world in significant ways, and we all > have a stake in how that goes. Her first day on the job was completely > overshadowed by her partner's aggressive pursuit of his own agenda. In the > weeks since, that has only intensified. > > When the ED responsible for the largest online community in the world > declines to take decisive and effective action on something this > significant, and declines to take ownership of her own introduction and > priorities, many people -- both on this list and in the wider world -- will > take notice, and will talk about what might, or could, or should happen > next. That is the natural way of things. > > One obvious "decisive action" she could take would be to "dump" her > partner. Her partner underscored that their connection was a legitimate > point of discussion by choosing to introduce himself entirely in reference > to her in his first email to this list,[3] and by then continuing to talk > about their relationship. > > When the idea that she might "dump" him comes up, I doubt the main intent > is ever to meddle in anybody's personal life. I have (of course) made > comments like this, in many private discussions, and I wouldn't be > surprised if it comes up again. It's a comment that comes up while talking > about possible outcomes, and ones that might stand a chance of resolving > this mess. "Dumping" is rarely a central topic of interest, simply because > nobody I've talked to knows much about the relationship beyond the baffling > and frightening dynamic that has played out in public. > > Right now, those who care about Wikimedia are in an incomprehensible > situation. The ED's partner, not the ED, is driving highly visible and > influential discussions. Of course all kinds of things are being said about > it, in all kinds of places. Anybody who acts surprised about that is in > some kind of denial, and -- probably unintentionally -- further fueling the > drama with their expressions of outrage. > > Commentary about a high profile relationship is normal, and while it's > *possible* for it to be mean-spirited, it often isn't. Anyone who wants to > abolish gossip doesn't have a problem with Wikimedians' sense of propriety, > they have a problem with a basic aspect of normal, human social > interactions, and/or with the dedication of a worldwide community that > deeply values our projects, and prioritizes their well-being. So please, > let's let this one go. Let's keep our attention on more important matters > -- for instance, how we can build the health, productivity, and diversity > of our communities. > > -Pete > [[User:Peteforsyth]] on English Wikipedia etc. I really can't imagine what you hoped to achieve by sending such an e-mail to this list. Here are the ethical principles I think you're espousing: 1) Vicious, hurtful gossip and speculation about a female executive's private personal life is acceptable 2) People who point out that this is a ridiculous position are manufacturing "outrage" to fuel drama 3) Recapping the whole sordid situation on a public, international mailing list is appropriate Needless to say, I disagree and I imagine many others will as well. The only utility of your post seems to be as an illustration of your moral compass. I seriously doubt any further good can come from this thread, so I would be perfectly happy for a moderator to kill it. _______________________________________________ Wikimedia-l mailing list, guidelines at: https://meta.wikimedia.org/wiki/Mailing_lists/Guidelines Wikimedia-l@lists.wikimedia.org Unsubscribe: https://lists.wikimedia.org/mailman/listinfo/wikimedia-l, <mailto:wikimedia-l-requ...@lists.wikimedia.org?subject=unsubscribe>
