this was written in lieu of a hot water bottle

Hot water bottle

On days when it is giving shelter
to a run of corpuscles
jostling each other
getting sqeezed out of
my body
on such days when my stomach is a benign shelter
it shares the dignity of Mount Kailasa at Shiva's
wedding, playing host to
a zillion 
subterraneans
crawling out of its innards
in a continuing explosion of reptilian forms
and odours flashing upon 
an outside             for the first time.

The air about the mountain is quietly
opening its pores to take on the 
guest load.

To stay still under performance could be the most
essential nature of a stage. 

which is why my stomach protests
rightly
on days when it is a billowing tent in ripple
the dome of an observatory
and it feels the catch of a 
ignominous pair of trousers riding up
below its arc
a metal zipper dragging together
two ends of cloth
threatening to walk across
its natural shape     leaving
footprints.
my stomach will sulk the rest of the day.

The sulks of mythical beings are not
left over threads from the tailor's shop, floating in
any slight breeze.
They require seperate rooms, their sulks 
are corporeal things.

I must push my legs against tables when i feel the
stomach shrink from me,
heave in offices, my blind fingers looking for ways to
stretch convention
moving under shawls, opening pant buttons, pushing at
a zip, they
slip in relief to a loose breast hanging in the wings
they rest, feeling flesh, stroking mounds and dips
before going lower wondering how
a quick shot of masturbation might be
managed in public, how
only that 
might bring some
relief




                
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