I am saddened to see that ableism and blatantly unacceptable behaviour is being sought to be normalized in this way.
If a woman asks her superior at 12 in the night to drop her home on a dangerous street, is the employer not obligated to do this? If employer reacts like mine did, will people not cry hoarse about sexism? Sent from my iPhone > On Jan 5, 2018, at 7:12 PM, Shireen Irani <shireen....@gmail.com> wrote: > > Hi Rahul, > Here are my 2 bits of wisdom! > ;-) > > yes, sadly this is more of a favour than an obligation, and asking the > office boy to summon him was perhaps not the best way to do this, > given his seniority which he seems to be constantly aware of, from the > way u describe him. If u just have to seek help again, you could > perhaps go to him personally and request him as a favour to come to > your desk, rather than having him summoned. People usually do like to > seem helpful, and requesting for favours is often more strategically > economical. unless of course it is a legitimate demand for a right. > In a scenario where the general attitude is that we're being employed > as a favour in the first place, its best to find as many ways to be > the least dependent, particularly on those who might have a say in > your performance appraisals etc. Its really unfortunate, but being on > top of things all the time, particularly when you're the only blind > person around, is really frustrating, but extremely mandatory if we > want to hold on to whatever mainstream space we manage to occupy. But > some of that knowhow will only come from experience being among your > colleagues and identifying their buttons! > Just try not to take things very personally for your own sanity, and > start afresh each day! U want to stick like glue to that space, till > you leave it of your own choosing. Pat yourself on the back for > accomplishing things thus far, and face the storm with a firm footing! > smile. > Best wishes! > > Shireen. > > >> On 1/5/18, Rahul Bajaj <rahul.bajaj10...@gmail.com> wrote: >> Hi Everyone, >> >> I hope this message finds you well. At my workplace, which is a law >> firm, I recently confronted a situation which I think I could have >> dealt with in a more graceful way. >> >> One of my superiors, who is not the nicest person to put it mildly, >> displayed blatant ableism and unacceptable conduct. We had to get a >> hard copy document notarized for filing purposes. Now, when I asked >> the office boy to request this superior to come to my desk and help me >> in picking out the documents that had to be notarized, as the >> documents were at my desk, he called me and said, his voice dripping >> with condescension, "Tell me, sir, what can I do for you?" >> >> Now, I am generally known to have a calm temperament and strive to be >> unfailingly polite to everyone. However, his response really rubbed me >> the wrong way, to put it mildly. Later, when he came to talk to me and >> sensed by my facial reaction that I was not happy with him, he asked >> me what the issue was. I told him, admittedly in a very combative and >> aggressive way, that his behavior was unacceptable. What he was doing >> for me was only a reasonable accommodation which he was mandated to >> provide. He was not doing me a favour, and it was wrong for him to >> think that I was ordering him to do something for him. I said this in >> a way angry and hurt way, as I don't think it is acceptable for anyone >> to behave in this fashion. >> >> I am wondering, in hindsight, if my response was proportionate to his >> behavior or if I should have reacted in a more graceful fashion. I >> know that many disabled people face thousands of silent indignities >> and don't complain about them, because, well, it can jeopardize their >> career, they have far more pressing concerns and this is just how the >> world is. But aren't we bound to call people out for ableism, even if >> it is uncomfortable? >> >> Best, >> Rahul >> >> The list has now migrated to www.accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in >> >> You should now post to the id: a...@accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in >> >> >> >> >> Search for old postings at: >> http://www.mail-archive.com/accessindia@accessindia.org.in/ >> >> To unsubscribe send a message to >> accessindia-requ...@accessindia.org.in >> with the subject unsubscribe. >> >> To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, please >> visit the list home page at >> http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in >> >> >> Disclaimer: >> 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking of the >> person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity; >> >> 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the mails >> sent through this mailing list.. >> > > The list has now migrated to www.accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in > > You should now post to the id: a...@accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in > > > > > Search for old postings at: > http://www.mail-archive.com/accessindia@accessindia.org.in/ > > To unsubscribe send a message to > accessindia-requ...@accessindia.org.in > with the subject unsubscribe. > > To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, please > visit the list home page at > http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in > > > Disclaimer: > 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking of the > person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity; > > 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the mails > sent through this mailing list.. The list has now migrated to www.accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in You should now post to the id: a...@accessindia.inclusivehabitat.in Search for old postings at: http://www.mail-archive.com/accessindia@accessindia.org.in/ To unsubscribe send a message to accessindia-requ...@accessindia.org.in with the subject unsubscribe. To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, please visit the list home page at http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in Disclaimer: 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking of the person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity; 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the mails sent through this mailing list..
