In a message dated 10/11/2008 11:04:30 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,  
[EMAIL PROTECTED] writes:

Hi  Mike---If you ever think cats have no use for people except for food you 
need  to experience a heartbreaking encounter with three little "senior" cats 
we  just took into our sanctuary....
===========================================
 
Thanks, Debbie.
 
Interesting piece here about changing attitudes regarding men and  cats: 
 

Sorry, Fido, It’s Just a Guy Thing 
 
October 5, 2008
 
from  
_http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/05/fashion/05cats.html?ref=style&pagewanted=all_
 
(http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/05/fashion/05cats.html?ref=style&pagewanted=all)
 

 
IF you ask Adam Fulrath who is the love of his life, he will barely blink an  
eye before responding: Parappa.  
Mr. Fulrath, a 37-year-old design director at Time Out New York, keeps five  
photographs of Parappa, a shorthaired, bicolored, mixed-breed cat, on his  
desktop. He knows that it might be considered a little weird that a grown man  
would be so enamored with his kitty, but Mr. Fulrath, who is into video games  
and comic books and calls himself a “straight, geeky guy,” doesn’t care. 
“She’s my primary relationship,” he said.  
Mr. Fulrath is one of a growing number of single — and yes, heterosexual —  
men who seem to be coming out of the cat closet and unabashedly embracing 
their  feline side. To that end, they are posting photographs and videos of 
their  
little buddies on YouTube and on Web sites like _menandcats.com_ 
(http://menandcats.com/) , and  Twittering about them to anyone who will 
listen. 
Indeed, it seems that man’s best friend is no longer a golden retriever, but  
a cuddly cat named Fluffy. This movement, such as it is, is in direct 
contrast  to the most notable in the recent spate of reports about the 
relationship  
between a man and a cat, which were far darker; they focused on a young actor  
who was recently on trial in New York City for killing his girlfriend’s cat —
 he  said it attacked him — only to have a jury decide after several days 
that it  could not reach a verdict. 
If it had been a little less violent, that case might have been more in line  
with what the world seems to expect of men and cats. 
The image of the crazy spinster cat lady persists, and plenty of people do  
wonder about a guy with a cat. As a writer on 
_adventuresofacitygirl.blogspot.com_ 
(http://adventuresofacitygirl.blogspot.com/)  put it: “Single men  and 
cats are like a burger and broccoli. Separately they are okay, but together  it 
just seems off.” 
But those who see a growing link between men and cats see that attitude (not  
to mention the cat slaying) as old-fashioned. 
Clea Simon, who wrote “The Feline Mystique: On the Mysterious Connection  
Between Women and Cats,” said: “I do think it has become more acceptable for 
men 
 to own cats — partly for practical reasons, like the growing realization 
that  they’re better city pets, and partly the whole acceptance of our 
cross-gender  traits that men crave intimacy, too.”  
Stacy Mantle, the founder of _Petsweekly.com_ (http://petsweekly.com/) , a  
magazine for pet lovers, said that men are becoming more “cat literate” 
because  they themselves are evolving. 
“It’s the unevolved members of the species who tend toward abuse of cats —  
and oftentimes, women and children,” said Ms. Mantle, who owns 18 cats.  
Although there are no hard (or soft) statistics (it is rare to find an owner, 
 man or woman, walking a cat in public), it seems that single, heterosexual 
male  cat owners are on the rise. Over the last few years Sandra DeFeo, an 
executive  director at the Humane Society of New York, said she had seen an 
increase in the  number of single, straight men who are adopting cats. 
Carole Wilbourn, a cat therapist (yes, really) in Manhattan, said that the  
number of her single, straight male clients has risen about 25 percent over the 
 last five years.  
When the Web site _PetPlace.com_ (http://petplace.com/)  asked  its readers, “
Do Real Men Own Cats?” almost 84 percent of respondents said  “yes.” “Only 
intelligent, aware, caring men love cats,” one reader said. And in  a 2005 
survey by Cats Protection, an animal welfare agency in the United  Kingdom, the 
majority of the 790 people who responded said it was cool for a guy  to own 
cats.  
This line of thinking does not surprise cat lovers, many of whom believe that 
 only pillars of virility and masculinity would dare to own one. They are 
quick  to point out other well-known macho cat owners: _Ernest Hemingway_ 
(http://topics.nytimes.com/top/reference/timestopics/people/h/ernest_hemingway/index.h
tml?inline=nyt-per) , _Mark Twain_ 
(http://topics.nytimes.com/top/reference/timestopics/people/c/samuel_langhorne_clemens/index.html?inline=nyt-per)
 , 
Victor Hugo and _Marlon Brando_ 
(http://topics.nytimes.com/top/reference/timestopics/people/b/marlon_brando/index.html?inline=nyt-per)
 , who reportedly found a 
stray cat on the  set of “The Godfather” and incorporated it into a scene. 
John Scalzi, 39, an author in Bradford, Ohio, has been a cat guy his entire  
life. In September 2006, he posted a picture of a piece of bacon taped to his  
cat, Ghlaghghee (pronounced Fluffy — an ode to _George Bernard Shaw_ 
(http://topics.nytimes.com/top/reference/timestopics/people/s/george_bernard_shaw/index
.html?inline=nyt-per) ), on his Web site _www.scalzi.com/whatever_ 
(http://www.scalzi.com/whatever) . Thousands of viewers  apparently found this 
hilarious. 
Mr. Scalzi, who is now married and has a daughter, blames Hollywood for the  
continual bad rap that has befallen the male cat owner. Originally, he said,  
only strong men like Don Corleone, or the villains in a James Bond film, had  
cats.  
“But then in the Seventies, Eighties and Nineties, Hollywood decided that we  
need to have the token gay man as the witty sidekick friend of the main 
female  protagonist,” he said. “ ‘What kind of signature thing can we give him 
to  
convey that he is not an entirely masculine being? I know! We’ll give him a 
big  fluffy cat!’ ” 
In fact, Mr. Scalzi thinks that dogs are for the weaker of spirit, since the  
dog is, in effect, “your wingman.” 
“If you’re feeling insecure about your space in the world, you get a dog  
because he will always back you up,” he said. “He’s the insecure man’s best  
friend.” 
A man with a cat, on the other hand, “is secure with himself,” he said. “He’
s  sharing his space with a predator.” 
Many women agree that guys with cats are extra special. 
“They make the best boyfriends because they’re totally cool with staying 
home  and watching a movie,” said Elizabeth Daza, 28, a video producer in 
Manhattan,  who dated a cat-owning man for eight years. “Straight men with cats 
seem 
to be  really secure and stable. They don’t need to be running around the park 
and  proving their masculinity like the dog guys.” 
On a practical level, cats are easier, male owners say — especially if they  
(the men) travel a lot. They can leave the cat alone for days on end, and the  
cat will survive. 
“I would feel guilty if I had a dog and was out of the country for three  
weeks,” said Mark Fletcher, 38, an entrepreneur in Redwood City, Calif. who has 
 
two cats, Einstein and Babe (as in Ruth). 
What’s more, cats are relatively low maintenance. 
“A dog is a lot of work,” said Nader Ali-Hassan, 29, an account executive  
with a digital marketing firm in Cleveland.  
Although he is married, he has had cats his entire life, and even has a  
picture of Ringo, a longtime feline companion, in his office. 
“Maybe it’s not the most masculine thing in the world, but I’m comfortable  
enough in my own manhood,” he said. “The cat’s nice. I come home after a long 
 day of work, it sits in my lap, I pet it, and then it goes about its 
business.”  
SOME guys are even using their cats as vehicles to celebrity, like Paul  
Klusman, 39, a Wichita, Kan., engineer who catapulted to Internet fame after  
posting “An Engineer’s Guide to Cats” on YouTube in April. 
The film, which features his three cats, Oscar, Ginger and Zoey, garnered  
about 3 million views. Mr. Klusman said he received about 300 marriage 
proposals 
 from “lonely cat ladies from all over the world,” in addition to more 
risqué  propositions. 
“Any single, straight man who has the slightest bit of insecurity about his  
own sexuality will probably find it difficult to admit to owning or even  
appreciating cats” he said, echoing Mr. Scalzi’s sentiments. 
Of course, it can become tricky, like when the cat gets in the way of a  
relationship.  
The Cats Protection study found that single male cat owners were more likely  
than their female counterparts to have made, or consider making, a sacrifice 
for  their cat — including giving up a holiday or going into debt for their 
cat if  necessary. 
Single men were also almost as likely as single women to break a friendship  
rather than lose their cat, and would consider choosing their cat over their  
partner. 
This happened to Mr. Fulrath, who dated a woman who was allergic to cats. 
“I thought, ‘This is never going to work,’ ” he recalled. “My cat takes  
priority over the new relationship. Realistically, unless there’s something  
absolutely amazing about her, he wins.”


 
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