Ah, so I see somebody is familiar with Hugh Gallagher's infamous essay. http://urbanlegends.miningco.com/library/blbyol3.htm
> > > ----- Original Message ----- > From: "Juan Blanco" > To: > Sent: Friday, March 14, 2003 6:34 AM > Subject: CCIE [7:65426] > > > > Team, > > I got this from a friend but I not sure if you have seen this or not but > > only someone pursuing the CCIE would laugh at it!! > > In the course of my day-to-day work, people ask me what is a CCIE? I > thought > > about this for some time. I wrote some notes. And this is what I came up > > with: > > I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling 8 foot computer racks and > charming > > magnetic security cardswipes. I have been known to remodel SME networks on > > my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of capital > > deployment, reliability and performance. I translate technobabble for > > Management, I write award-winning technical presentations and deliver them > > better than an American president announcing tax cuts. > > I can recite complete chapters of the Cisco Documentation CD, backwards > and, > > with little effort and at the same time, perform decimal to binary > > conversion for very large numbers. > > I woo women with my sensuous and godlike MIDI playing on a notebook. I can > > pilot computer trolleys up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I > can > > rack Cisco gear faster than Arnold Schwarznegger can bench press. I am an > > expert in network diagramming tools, a veteran in web surfing, and know > the > > Cisco Web Site better than I know my own family. > > Just to keep it interesting, I occasionally tread water for three days > while > > programming Cisco practice labs. I manage time efficiently and can > complete > > a timesheet every week. In addition, I know the part number for every > Cisco > > router cable. > > Using only a Chinese AC power cord and a large glass of water, I once > > single-handedly rebuilt the network core of major co-location facility > after > > the roof fell in. I used to play games, but now it's serious. I am the > > subject of numerous urban myths and I am the creator of a few as well. > When > > I'm bored, I test fiber optic cable, calculate power loss sums on UTP and > > the minimum refraction index for 50 micron multimode fiber. I mean, what > IS > > the point of it ? > > I understand that DLSW and Source Route Translational Bridging actually > has > > a reason for existence. It's not just IBM playing a practical joke. > Really. > > I enjoy urban guerilla activities. I can build a 802.11b parabolic dish > > antennae using surplus antennae from defunct satellite companies and a > juice > > can. It has better performance than off the shelf products. I think that > > having a wind generator and solar array as power backup for my practice > lab > > is not only responsible preparation, it's environmentally friendly too. On > > Wednesdays, after work, I repair old monitors free of charge for my local > > charity. > > I know that canonical to non-canonical conversion is not about religion, > > it's about "ART." > > Microsoft geeks worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening > > wear, which I don't understand -- it was supposed to be funny. I don't > > perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been > caller > > number ten and have won the cash jackpot. > > I can speak IPX NLSP, AppleTalk, ATM PVC, QoS, and BGP to name a few, and > > redistribute routes at will, with filtering, using non contiguous masks. I > > install IPV6 on customer sites whenever I can, just so I can play with it. > > Same for OSPF NSSA. Children trust me. > > I can hurl squishy giveaway tradeshow toys at sales personnel with > stunning > > accuracy, and ensure that the dweeb from administration gets the blame. I > > have charisma beyond normal mortals; if I didn't the boss would have sent > > the other guy to this exam. > > I once read Cisco Quality of Service, Caslow Bridges and Routers 2nd Ed, > and > > Jeff Doyles' Routing TCP/IP Vol2 in one day, and still had time to do > > practice on a Frame Relay multipoint network, using OSPF and IGRP, split > > horizon, route maps and ISDN. I know the exact location of every food item > > in the supermarket and I use a link state protocol to calculate the > shortest > > path to get there. > > I have performed several covert operations with the CIA. It was kind of > fun > > having them follow me around. I know that security and privacy is a > > phantasm-like myth created by "security companies" to extract money from > IT > > Managers who can't implement a decent security policy. But it's great fun > to > > play with. > > I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. I know exactly > how > > much coffee my body will take to sustain me at peak function. While on > > vacation, I successfully negotiated with the hotel to fix their network in > > return for free accommodation. The laws of society do not apply to me. > > I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On > > weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact tech stock day > > trading. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it > > down. > > I can originate default routes, conditionally, after redistributing from a > > classful distance vector protocol. I have made extraordinary four course > > meals using my Cisco 7500 lab router as a stove (after all its runs all > the > > time anyway). > > I breed prizewinning idioms. Fox Mulder knows my phone number. I have > spoken > > with Elvis. > > > > Juan Blanco Message Posted at: http://www.groupstudy.com/form/read.php?f=7&i=65457&t=65426 -------------------------------------------------- FAQ, list archives, and subscription info: http://www.groupstudy.com/list/cisco.html Report misconduct and Nondisclosure violations to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
