These are all great points and I appreciate you taking the time to share
them with (us) me.

Yes, I called it a "critique" because, well, when you learn certain terms in
school, you tend to bring them with you to your day job. ;-) If I could to a
mediocre job summarizing my own experience, I'd say the goals of design
reviews have typically been twofold and very symbiotic, kind of like a
dance:

1. the designer informs others of the state of the design: kind of a "if we
were to ship it now, here's what it would look/act/be like", and explains (I
hate saying "defends" because it shouldn't be an attack) their rationale,
intent, missing pieces, next steps, etc.
2. the audience weighs in on it from their perspectives; either making sure
the design meets their needs (quantitative) or as a peer making suggestions
for improvement (qualitative), and encourages focus for further
investigation in the right areas.

The subtle nuances of the dance can either make the session successful and
move the design forward in leaps and bounds or, well, not.

Since Jonas discussed the professor/teacher's role, has anyone had success
in (or thoughts about) having a third person be a "moderator" in
professional design reviews such as a manager?

A few rules I've worked by:

Designer: Don't take things personally. It's about the design, not you. And
you are not your design. And if someone's being a real jerk, either get them
to explain themselves more or ask others for their thoughts on that person's
comment. There could be a nugget of gold in there.

Audience: Try to understand the design and look for both positives and
negatives. Point out the things that do work so they don't get deleted in
trying to fix the things that don't. And don't be that jerk. What you say is
as important as how you say it. And back things up with solid reasoning.
Saying "I don't like it" vs. "the design of that component gives a false
affordance..." produces very different results.

~Lisa
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