I believe that as 'outsiders' to a particular culture, if we feel women are
being discriminated against, we can only try to enlighten those women about
their rights and leave it up to them to decide what to do about their
situation. Otherwise we are interfering and will end up causing more hurt
and violence.
We also need to involve the men otherwise they will be threatened by any
change in their women.

Two very small examples:
1. I worked in a small rural development project in Swaziland where I was
trying to uplift the women who bore the brunt of a weak economic system and
were dependent on their men for money. One woman, Siphiwe, had a talent in
sewing and started making dresses to sell through a loan with the project.
Her husband was unemployed and an alcoholic, and when he saw her doing well
and bringing money into the home for food, school fees and clothing, he
became jealous and beat her up (to get them money for alcohol). At times
Siphiwe became depressed and talked to me saying she should just give him
the money because he was 'her boss'. I talked to her about the value of her
new-found empowerment, but had no right to tell her what to do in her
marriage. She continued making dresses and her husband continued beating
her - and two years later she suddenly left the village. She had gone to
live in another village nearby and using money from her sewing business set
herself up with a chicken project. She decided when enough was enough and
she empowered herself to make the change.

2. Another woman in the same village, Margaret, lived at home with 9
children. Her husband worked on the mines in South Africa, and made her
pregnant every year when he came home for Christmas. She was scared to use
birth control measures in case he accused her of infidelity or took another
wife to have more children. She offered her services, initially as a
volunteer, to run our first pre-school in the village. Knowing the poor
nutritional condition of her family we fundraised and managed to get enough
money to start paying Margaret a small wage. When her husband Justice was
retrenched from the mines because of ill-health, she was worried that he
would make her stay at home and stop working. Justice, however, came back
and found all sorts of community development projects on the go, and saw
that his wife was making a valuable contribution to the family's well-being.
He applied for a loan after securing a contract to make bricks and build the
first community pre-school and community business centre, and started a
successful small contractor's business. They both continued with their
respective work, and became key activists in the village's development.

Janine Ward
Oxfam GB
South Africa


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