The *obliviousness* of this post is stupefying.

Barry, if criticism constitutes an attempt at "fixing,"
you are FFL's Master Fixer.


--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, turquoiseb <no_reply@...> wrote:
>
> It's interesting, on this forum at least, to be the subject
> of so much pondering, but without a shred of ill intent or
> attempts to demonize being involved in the pondering. Good
> pondering chops, Xeno.  :-)
> 
> Might I suggest that the reason yours are more interesting 
> and quite possibly more accurate than other people's is the
> following:
> 
> --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "Xenophaneros Anartaxius" <anartaxius@> 
> wrote:
> >
> > As for Turq, Barry, I can hypothesise he has some 
> > emotional issues, but really I am just making that 
> > up. If he has such issues, it is not up to me to 
> > fix them, that is his journey. 
> 
> THAT is the whole difference between your musings and
> those of others. Many of these others -- NOT just when
> dealing with me but with many other people as well -- 
> seem to feel not only the need to "fix" those they 
> interact with, but the right to do so. Such people 
> really DO think that "fixing" those they don't approve 
> of or don't like IS up to them. In their heads, it's 
> their job.
> 
> But it isn't. It wouldn't be even if they were spiritual 
> teachers, which no one on this forum really is. 
> 
> The problem as I see is not perceiving others and making
> assumptions about them based on their scribblings in
> cyberspace; we all do that. The problem is deciding that
> one has the right to try to change these others.
> 
> Quite frankly -- in my analysis -- those who are most 
> likely to take upon themselves the "job" of trying to 
> change others, on this forum and on other "spiritual"
> forums, are the very people *who change the least
> themselves*. You can go back a year, three years,
> ten years, or twenty, and you find them writing 
> essentially the same posts, often to the same people,
> demanding in the same tones that they change. But the 
> "compulsive fixers" never seem to change themselves,
> or even see the need to change themselves. *They're*
> not the ones who are broken; the people they're 
> lecturing to are broken.
> 
> I tend to disagree. In my view, everyone here is pretty
> much equal in being broken, and no one here has either
> the right or the ability to fix them. We're all just
> bozos on this bus.
> 
> Interestingly, those who seem to feel the strongest sense 
> of entitlement when it comes to fixing others are often 
> those who show the most resistance when anyone else points 
> out something in their *own* behavior that could use a
> little changing. Turnabout is *definitely* not fair play 
> for the compulsive "fixers." 
> 
> While I think that your ideal of viewing what other
> people write as lessons is good, in some cases I have
> written off some of these lessons, and the "fixers"
> who try to deliver them, as Just Not Worthy Of My Time. 
> 
> Over the course of years, I haven't found anything
> of use in any of the things they've tried to "fix"
> in me, and thus I don't see their lessons as having
> any value. To me at least. Maybe others do, and that
> is their business. Me, I just write them off and 
> stop bothering to read what they write. I'm pretty
> sure, having done this for some months now, that 
> I have not missed anything of value. What I have 
> missed is being lectured to by people who seem to 
> feel that they can "fix" me without ever having put 
> any effort into fixing themselves first. I urge them 
> to take their "fixer upper" mentality elsewhere, and 
> aim it at those who might appreciate it. :-)
>


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