--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "authfriend" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: >> If so, yes, but it's not so. You've got what he says > wrong, which is why I said you weren't tuned in. > > What you got *right* is that what he says he wants > isn't what he wants. > > And what he says is contradictory. So it's no wonder > you haven't quite been following it all. > > On the one hand, he says people shouldn't respond > to me. This part is actually true; he wishes > people wouldn't respond to me.
Yes, I think he is probably honestly expressing a part of himself there. > On the other hand, he *also* says explicitly (this > is the part you're missing) that he wants me to > respond to what he calls his button-pushing. Yes, you're quite right; I do recall his explicitly having said this in the past. However, I think it's quite possible he has (in part) also been telling the truth here. In fact, I think it's likely he has *always* been partly telling the truth, and partly lying, as he most likely consists of numerous particles who aren't always in agreement, as I think he's also said. This does not make him particularly *spiritual* of course -- just in recognition of his own "brilliantly Eclectic multidimensionality" (if you like him) or "horrendously slimy lack of integrity" (if you don't like him). :-) Personally, I've found that this awareness of all-the-varied- particles has been a *huge* step toward actually *gaining* integrity, particularly when I've *stopped* denying them/mindlessly identifying with them and started truly Witnessing them, paying detached/loving attention to them, hearing them and allowing them to hear Me, so that we may come together into a physical synthesis that allows all our goals to be met -- truly allows us to sing together and manifest our shared paradise. This > is the part that *isn't* true. It's designed to > embarrass me into not commenting on his posts. Could be; I don't really know. Getting you to feel embarassed, I can see, because I've been there (see below). But to embarass you into not commenting? Maybe so, maybe not. How can we really know? It would seem you are making him out to be a *total moron* if his true motive has been only to shut you up, since obviously, as you point out, this tactic hasn't even remotely worked in God-knows-how-many years. Now I *do* know that parts of us (or parts of me, anyway) indeed appear to be essentially moronic, unthinking, repetitive habit- patterns that continually fail to accomplish the stated motives of the larger self. But I've found on closer look that these habit- patterns are usually sustained because they *are* accomplishing their own goals as best they might; they're actually quite content with the status quo, and/or are afraid of what the alternative(s) might bring them. So that's my hypothesis here: that on the level of the patterns doing the interacting, both you and Barry *are* quite content with the status quo. The fact that this status quo hasn't changed in so many years tends to support my hypothesis. In other words, it's what IS, so it must be Perfect! :-) You yourself showed me this, when I was trying to "help" you into seeing your own enlightenment: we don't really need "help," we just need to be appreciated where we are. Well, now I *do* appreciate where you are, very much, because *you* do, and you showed me that; you showed me your infinite beauty as You ARE. I was just commenting that I see the same infinite beauty between you and Barry as It IS, but if your bliss consists in not acknowledging that, then that's also infinitely beautiful as It IS, and I am content with that. Either way, I bow down to your infinite resplendent beauty. > Seriously, now. If you were Barry, would you want > me to comment on your posts? *lol* You're funny! But honestly, how would I know what Barry really wants? All I can see is what he shows me about myself, the stories and patterns we awaken between Us; In himself he is (as far as I can see) Nothing/Everything/Pure Radiant ISness, just like everything and everyone else. As he himself has pointed out, the very act of being attended to, of having a number of minds read one's posting, can be quite a rush, quite addicting in itself. I wouldn't at all be surprised if *that* was what was really behind this lovely dance. I do remember as a kid I *loved* to tease my brothers, to get a rise out of them. Same thing, maybe. Attention, excitement, maybe even a fight! Yay! :-) Years later, my younger brother very kindly lent me his diaries from those years, and I found that I had unconsciously acted out this kind of behavior on my siblings *invariably* right after my Dad had pulled something really kooky, really violent, on us. (He was a brilliant man, very charming, but had serious addictive and id-control issues, rather like a dry drunk -- stemming, perhaps, from temporal-lobe injuries sustained from motorcycle accidents, or maybe not.) Anyhow, even at the time I noticed that teasing my brothers and *getting them to explode* (partially) relieved and expressed the anger I wasn't letting myself feel, and let me feel superior in the process. So, yeah, getting them to feel shamed or embarassed was part of the "fun," as that also (partially) relieved my own layers of shame and embarassment I wasn't letting myself feel, but I *certainly* didn't want to be ignored. So that may be part of the dynamic here. Or maybe not? I don't know. On closer reflection, I recall that it's quite true my "demonic-patterns" didn't *at all* want to be nailed, recognized, thrown into the spotlight of the Witness, forced to recognize the pain of their own rebellion and (non)existence. They would much rather have been ignored, allowed to survive and thrive in darkness. So yes, that too well be part of the dance; you're right! > Of course, on other occasions he also professes > great frustration at my "trashing" his posts. > That's another one that's actually true. *lol* Yes, I think that's quite probably so! > When you've been exposed to Barry over a long > period, you catch on to the pattern, because it's > repeated over and over. The only way he knows how > to deal with people is to try to manipulate them. > That has never worked with me. But he really has > no idea how to do anything *else*, so he just > keeps doing the same things. Well, you may well be right -- God knows, we all keep on doing what we're doing until we show ourselves something better! :-) At any rate, I was just trying to point out that there must be *something* in it that's working, and working well -- it's probably outlived most of the individuals of most of the species on this planet! That kind of longevity *alone* is worth tipping my hat to! :-) *A*U*M* *L*L*L*
