From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > Based on my own experience, Jim, I'd have to disagree. I can attest to absolutely incredible outpourings of love that have been showered on me. >
And that has been wonderful, Anne. As a Patient Care Technician in Oncology here at the largest hospital in the Tampa Bay area, I'm well aware of just how important such support can when battling the disease. We've all (me included) taken an active interest in your situation and pray for your complete return to the very best of health. It appears (and I pray) that you are well on your way. In all fairness to my point of last evening, however, I would exclude your situation as "a special case." What I was referring to - and, granted, I STILL haven't voiced this impression of mine in a way which satisfies me - when I said that the professed love between listers "vanishes when the rubber hits the road" stems from the fact that some of the same individuals who are lovey-dovey with one another at times can then engage in unpleasantries when the going gets tough. My impression is that - unlike other lists I'm on which are less personal in tone - people here get wrapped up in their JMDL personas (which is due to the tenor of the list - it invites that), and they like to be viewed as "sensitive," "caring," "the most knowledgeable" on certain topics - whatever. Then, things go to hell rather quickly when those personas are questioned or threatened. I maintain that if you have a message intended for a specific person, these messages have greater value to the person and are more sincere when they are communicated privately. There is no question, then, that the sentiment is real, and not done for effect. For instance, Colin had to put one of his dogs down recently, and I had no great issue with him sharing that unfortunate development with the list. But, then, why couldn't people wishing to grieve with him do so privately? That's the most recent example of what it is I'm talking about. Should a JMDL digest be filled with posts commiserating with Colin? (No offense, Colin. I'm just using this example.) At that point the list devolves into more of a support group (for a select few, in terms of the 800 subscribers) or a social club, and less a forum for an exchange of views on Joni, music in general, and other topics of wide-ranging cultural interest to JMDL subscribers. I don't mean to come off as heartless, or as "a heel." In truth, I'm a real good guy I reckon. People who know me like me a lot - I'm blessed with a lot of friendships I've maintained from different points and places in my life - and I don't know many people who are more compassionate and empathetic and willing to go out of their way for others than I am "in real life." I guess it's just that that's not what I come to the JMDL for, or what I feel the list should be about. Maybe there could be a separate "Joni Fest" list or something where the "community" thing is the thing ... where the most active participants of the 800 JMDL subscribers, who've forged a bond with one another, and who choose to subscribe and participate, can keep each other abreast of happenings in their daily lives and receive support and friendship "on list" from one another, for all to see. That's it from me on this topic, folks. I already feel like a shit. I've just been trying to be honest and upfront about the different (from other music lists) nature of the JMDL, and I still haven't expressed myself well. I'm not going anywhere, though. My new schedule of 12-1/2 hour days means I get 4 days off per week. So, I'll disappear on the days I work, but will now have more of an opportunity to be a more active participant on the JMDL again, which is something I look forward to. Best to all, and no offense intended to any individual, Jim
