> jQuery('a')
>   .cond(
>     x === 1, function(){
>       this.css({ color: 'blue' });
>     },
>     x === 2, function(){
>       this.css({ color: 'red' });
>     },
>     test, function( val ){
>       this.css({ color: val });
>     },
>     function(){
>       this.css({ color: 'green' });
>     }
>   ).length;


Uhm, At the risk of exposing my complete failure to get the big
ongoing joke here (started by DBJDBJ),
...how is this `.cond()` thing supposed to be more readable/useful/
jQuery-ish than plain old:

    jQuery('a').each(function(){
      if (x === 1) {
        $(this).css({ color: 'blue' });
      }
      else if (x === 2) {
        $(this).css({ color: 'red' });
      }
      else if (test()) {
        $(this).css({ color: val });
      }
      else {
        $(this).css({ color: 'green' });
      }
    });

or an even more succinct:

    jQuery('a').each(function(){
      x === 1 ?
          $(this).css({ color: 'blue' }):
      x === 2 ?
          $(this).css({ color: 'red' }):
      test() ?
          $(this).css({ color: val }):
          $(this).css({ color: 'green' });
    });


pray tell?

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