[lace-chat] Tracking Santa as he travels round the world
Just in case any wants to track santa on his way here is a website which gives continual updates. http://www.noradsanta.org/en/default.php Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays* to everyone and I hope you all have a happy time. *delete as applicable :-) (polically incorrect)Jane Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] FW: dearly departed
Don't think I have seen this here before hope no one is offended. After being nearly snowbound for two weeks last winter, a Seattle man departed for his vacation in Miami Beach, where he was to meet his wife the next day at the conclusion of her business trip to Minneapolis. They were looking forward to pleasant weather and a nice time together. Unfortunately, there was some sort of mix up at the boarding gate, and the man was told he would have to wait for a later flight. He tried to appeal to a supervisor but was told the airline was not responsible for the problem and it would do no good to complain. Upon arrival at the hotel the next day, he discovered that Miami Beach was having a heat wave, and its weather was almost as uncomfortably hot as Seattle's was cold. The desk clerk gave him a message that his wife would arrive as planned. He could hardly wait to get to the pool area to cool off, and quickly sent his wife an e-mail, but due to his haste, he made an error in the e-mail address. His message therefore arrived at the home of an elderly preacher's wife whose even older husband had died only the day before. When the grieving widow opened her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out an anguished scream, and fell to the floor dead. Her family rushed to her room where they saw this message on the screen: Dearest wife, Departed yesterday as you know. Just now got checked in. Some confusion at the gate. Appeal was denied. Received confirmation of your arrival tomorrow. Your loving husband. P.S. Things are not as we thought. You're going to be surprised at how hot it is down here. Jane UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Re: coffee and tea preferences
Tamara wrote: I'd meant to ask but forgot when writing my long-winded essay... do y'all think there's a correlation between *dedicated* tea/coffee drinkers on the one hand and the choice of pets on the other? I don't have a pet at the moment (negotiations with DH are slower than lacemaking g), but I'm a tea and dog lover Personally I prefer McVities Digestive Biscuits with my tea, great for dunking :-))) Jane Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Moments in Life
This was forwarded to me by my best friend. She knows where to hit the spot. I don't remember seeing it here so I thought it would be good to share. Moments in Life There are moments in life when you miss someone so much that you just want to pick them from your dreams and hug them for real! When the door of happiness closes, another opens; but often times we look so long at the closed door that we don't see the one, which has been opened for us. Don't go for looks; they can deceive. Don't go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile, because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright. Find the one that makes your heart smile. Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do. May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy. The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can't go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches. When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so at the end, you're the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying. Please send this message to those who have touched your life in one way or another; to those who make you smile when you really need it; to those who make you see the brighter side of things when you are really down; to those whose friendship you appreciate; to those who are so meaningful in your life. If you don't send it, don't worry, nothing bad will happen to you; will just miss out on the opportunity to brighten someone's day with this message!!! Don't count the years-count the memories... Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take; but by the moments that take our breath away! Jane Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Failure
Try typing the word *Failure* into your Google search bar and guess who's name is at the top of the list. :-)) Jane Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] FW: Some history for you
You might have seen this one!!! This was forwarded to me but not being American or an historian I can't vouch for these but they seem interesting. I would be interested to know if they are correct. Have a history teacher explain this...if they can Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846. John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946. Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860. John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960. Both were particularly concerned with civil rights. Both wives lost their children while living in the White House. Both Presidents were shot on a Friday. Both Presidents were shot in the head. Now it gets really weird. Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy. Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln. Both were assassinated by Southerners. Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson. Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808. Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908. John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839. Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939. Both assassins were known by their three names. Both names are composed of fifteen letters. Now hang on to your seat. Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Ford.' Kennedy was shot in a car called 'Lincoln' made by 'Ford.' Lincoln was shot in a theater and his assassin ran and hid in a warehouse. Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and his assassin ran and hid in a theater. Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials. And here's the kicker... A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe. Jane Portchester, UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] RE: lace-chat-digest V2005 #133
Tamara and Weronika You might be interested in this test. It takes quite a while to do but is quite interesting. There is currently a series running on our BBC regarding this very thing and this test relates to it. http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/sex/add_user.shtml Have fun. Jane Portchester UK I was uncertain about my orientation at 20:) And, even at 55 (almost 56), I still think a female form is easier on the eyes than a male one; it just doesn't give me as much satisfaction beyond the visual aspect g We grew up being much more relaxed about sex than Americans are - Colette and Proust were compulsory reading as early as highschool. And we *never* equalled moral and sexual... To us, moral and ethical were synonyms, and both extended *waaay past* matters of simple sex, which are one of the *components* of morality, but not the whole. i do girl things too. i love to shop,crochet, knit, crewel, and lately bobbin lace. i also like sewing. quilting, and dance and country music, Ah, but according to the writer of the article I'd mentioned, most of those activities are *not* girly :) Shopping is. Or can be. But that's really the only one which doesn't require *systematic* approach... I'm a more masculine shopper than DH is... I go (with a list), I see, I conquer, I get the hell outa there. He goes, it takes him twice as long, and he comes back with half of the stuff I asked him to get, but a bagfull of stuff we don't need (but it caught his eye)... It used to drive me up the wall, because it's *women* who are supposed to be the nitwits who spend the money without thinking (and do everything else without thinking). When I first came here, Severn even *warned* me that, coming from a deprived environment, I might be tempted to lose my cotton-picking mind and spend, and spend, and spend... But I notice that *it's he* - who grew up among all the riches - that gets beguiled by non-essentials... To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] FW: Dogs and Cats
As seen in a dog's diary: 8am - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favourite! 9am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favourite... 10am - Oh Boy! A walk! My favourite! 11am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favourite! Noon - Oh Boy! The kids! Yaaay great fun! 1pm - Oh Boy! The yard! My favourite! 3pm - Oh Boy! More kids! Excellent! 4pm - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favourite! 5pm - Oh Boy! Mum! Brilliant! 7pm - Oh Boy! Playing ball! My favourite! 9pm - Oh Boy! Sleeping in master's bed! Yippee! As seen in a cat's diary: Day 183 of my captivity... My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favourite chair - must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little Cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan. There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of allergies. Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time... Jane Bawn Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Re: Credit Cards.
and now, the latest thing is that shops, businesses etc may pass on the % fee they are charged by the card company, onto the customer, so your goods may cost an extra 3%. Some of our shops used to do it; sometimes for all purchases, sometimes only for small-amount purchases. But I haven't seen it done in years; people were refusing to use the credit card in their stores, but they had to pay a fee to the issuer anyway. I can't remember which company it is (either John Lewis or Debenhams) add at the bottom of their credit card receipts that a portion of the credit card bill includes a 3?% credit card charge. (It is not in addition to but is part of the original bill). I discovered that this was itemised because VAT is not charged on credit card fees. Therefore if you buy something for say £ 10.00 with your credit card, there is an in built credit card charge of 30 pence. You still only pay £ 10.00 but they can claw back the VAT element hidden in the 30 pence credit charge. Crafty! Not a lot you might think. But take that figure and then multiply it by the millions of pounds turnover they do per year and it adds up to quite a significant sum. I have noticed other companies doing it, H Samual (the jewellers), PC World, for example; probably for the same reasons. Although I think they may be owned by the same ultimate company. I think customs are having a bit of a winge about it and they are actually challenging it so it may alter in the future. Incidently at the moment, in this country at any rate, shops are not allowed to pass on the credit card charges to customers its part of the terms and conditions of running a credit card facility in your company. Jane Bawn Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] RE: [lace] Re: embroidered stamp
Yippee! It's arrived! Thanks ever so much Tamara. I have wanted this stamp ever since I have known of its existence. The decision now is whether to put it in my stamp album or with all my lace memorabilia. I'll decide once I have shown it to everyone. :-) My mum, who is 79 is constantly amazed when I tell her about the internet and the people I meet there and how kind and friendly everyone is. When I told her I had won a raffle with someone I had never met, who lived in another country she couldn't quite comprehend it. g So she'll be especially pleased to see it. Best wishes and thanks again Jane Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] FW: Seven Wonders of the World
Something to make you think THE SEVEN WONDERS OF THE WORLD A group of students were asked to list what they thought were the present Seven Wonders of the World. Though there were some disagreements, the following received the most votes: 1. Egypt's Great Pyramids 2. Taj Mahal 3. Grand Canyon 4. Panama Canal 5. Empire State Building 6. St. Peter's Basilica 7. China's Great Wall While gathering the votes, the teacher noted that one student had not finished her paper yet. So she asked the girl if she was having trouble with her list. The girl replied, Yes, a little. I couldn't quite make up my mind because there were so many. The teacher said, Well, tell us what you have, and maybe we can help. The girl hesitated, then read, I think the 'Seven Wonders of the World' are: 1. To See 2. To Hear 3. To Touch 4. To Taste 5. To Feel 6. To Laugh 7. And to Love. The room was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop. The things we overlook as simple and ordinary and that we take for granted are truly wondrous! A gentle reminder -- that the most precious things in life cannot be built by hand or bought by man Jane Bawn in freezing Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Memory Lapses Anyone?
Can't remember if this has been on the list before but if it has put it down to a mental aberration on my part! Those of us who occasionally have had lapses of recall gave them the anodyne title 'Senior Moments'. That however was seen as ageist and so 'Intellectual Interludes' - was substituted and we had a short period of being flattered by an implication of having intellect, albeit subject to short absences of mind. But the PC worm has turned and we are now referred to as suffering from the CRAFT Syndrome. CRAFT? Oh yes, it is indeed a mnemonic to help us avoid forgetting it. It stands for Can't Remember a Flipping Thing! Jane Bawn ( who has more CRAFT moments than she cares to remember g) Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Re: 'moly'
So is this of the same genus as the Holy Moly g Joy wrote: No wonder it wasn't in your dictionaries! Mine says that moly is a mythical herb with a black root and milk-white flowers that Hermes gave to Odysseus. It also says that a European wild garlic that is cultivated for its yellow flowers has been named after it. ??? Man, English don't make no sense. At least they are both herbs. Though I don't think that a wild garlic would have sprigs to pick *or* lick. So the characters must have had a source of the mythical plant. Jane in Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Death of a very important person
With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry La Prise, the man who wrote The Hokey Kokey, died peacefully at age 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started. Jane in Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Top Tips
Forwarded from a Golf list with a few words deleted! 1. If a small child is choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a jug of boiling water down its throat and hey presto! The blockage is almost instantly removed. 2. A mousetrap, placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from going back to sleep. 3. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away. 4. Keep the seat next to you on the train vacant by smiling and nodding at people as they walk up the aisle. 5. Weight watchers. Avoid that devilish temptation to nibble at the chocolate bar in the cupboard or fridge by not buying any in the first place. 6. Save on booze by drinking cold tea instead of whisky. The following morning you can create the effects of a hangover by drinking a thimble full of washing up liquid and banging your head repeatedly on the wall. 7. Recreate the fun of a visit to a public swimming pool in your own home by filling the bath with cold water, adding two bottles of bleach, then urinating into it, before jumping in. 8. Don't buy expensive 'ribbed' cond*ms, just buy an ordinary one and slip a handful of frozen peas inside it before you put it on. 9. X-Files fans. Create the effect of being abducted by aliens by drinking two bottles of vodka. You'll invariably wake up in a strange place the following morning; having had your memory mysteriously 'erased'. 10. Don't waste money buying expensive binoculars. Simply stand closer to what you want to look at. 11. Putting just the right amount of gin in your goldfish bowl makes the fishes' eyes bulge and cause them to swim in an amusing manner. 12. Save time when crossing a one-way street by only looking in the direction of oncoming traffic. 13. Thicken up runny low-fat yoghurt by stirring in a spoonful of lard. 14. Anorexics, when your knees become fatter than your legs, start eating cakes again. 15. A next door neighbour's car aerial, carefully folded, makes an ideal coat hanger in an emergency. 16. Hijackers. Avoid a long stressful siege and the risk of arrest, imprisonment or death by simply making sure you book a flight to your intended destination in the first place. 17. An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator. 18. Olympic athletes. Disguise the fact that you've taken anabolic steroids by running a bit slower. 19. Avoid arguments with the missus about lifting the loo seat by simply p*ssing in the sink. 20. Vegetarians coming to dinner? Simply serve them a nice bit of steak or veal. Since they're always going on about how tofu, Quorn, meat substitute etc 'tastes exactly like the real thing', they won't know any difference. 21. Invited by vegetarians for dinner? Point out that since you'd no doubt be made aware of their special dietary requirements, tell them about yours, and ask for a nice steak. 22. Spice up your sex life by trying a bit of 'rodeo s*x'. Take your missus from behind and, holding on tightly to her jugs, call her by the wrong name. See how long you can 'stay mounted' for. 23. Before attempting to remove stubborn stains from a garment always circle the stain in permanent pen so that when you remove the garment from the washing machine you can easily locate the area of the stain and check that it has gone. 24. Have all your dumps at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid for it Jane Bawn Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] ANSWERING MACHINE IN A PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL
Have you ever telephoned a company and got a computerised voice telling you which number to press? This was sent to me by my DB (dear boyfriend) from a golf list. ANSWERING MACHINE IN A PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hot Line. If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, please press 4,5 and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace the call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are a manic-depressive, it doesnt matter which number you press, no one will answer. If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep, or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short term memory loss, please press 9. If you have short term memory loss, please press 9. If you have short term memory loss, please press 9. If you have short term memory loss, please press 9. If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All operators are too busy to talk to you. If you are menopausal, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won t be crazy for ever. Jane Bawn email [EMAIL PROTECTED] To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Smile
I've not seen this one before, it appeared on another list I am on and I thought my Arachne friends might find it amusing. One day, a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river when her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, Why are you crying? The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water, and she needed the thimble to make her living. The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden thimble. Is this your thimble? the Lord asked. The seamstress replied, No. The Lord again went down and came up with a wooden thimble. Is this your thimble? the Lord asked. Again, the seamstress replied, No. The Lord went down again and came up with a silver thimble. Is this your thimble? the Lord asked. The seamstress replied, Yes. The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy. Some time later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, Why are you crying? Oh, Lord, my husband has fallen into the water! The Lord went down into the water and came up with Mel Gibson. Is this your husband? the Lord asked. Yes! cried the seamstress. The Lord was furious. You lied! That is an untruth! The seamstress replied, Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to Mel Gibson, you would have come up with Tom Cruise. Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I am a poor woman and am not able to take care of all three husbands, so that's why I said 'yes' to Mel Gibson. The moral of this story is: Whenever a woman lies, it is for a good and honorable reason, and for the benefit of others. Jane Bawn Portchester UK email [EMAIL PROTECTED] To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Re: Pictures (was Heather's Phone Call)
On May 8, 2004, at 16:43, H. Muth (Heather) wrote: I like having the voice and the photo to go along with the letters from Arachnids. I 'hear' them when I read their writings. I have a picture of Bev Walker in my mind whenever she writes. And any others I have met or heard or of whom I have seen pictures. It just adds to the daily Arachne dose. I know what you mean Heather having been to www.lacefairy.com and seen a lot of the faces attached to the most familiar names on this list I find I have the face in mind when I read their messages it must be nice to be able to attach the voice also. I'm born and bred Portsmouth but English speaking foreigners tend to think I come from London. Huh! an me that speaks the Queen's English don't you know. NOT! LOL Jane Bawn Portchester, UK email [EMAIL PROTECTED] To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] RE: Lace Guild Magazine
Liz wrote: Am I wrong in thinking that there should have been an April UK Lace Guild Magazine? If so, did anyone get one? Mine came this morning but I wanted to see what all my arachne friends were saying first :-) so haven't read it yet. Jane Bawn Portchester UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] RE: St Georges Day
Also, I don't know about other countries but in this country to fly the Union Jack or just the England flag we have to have local planning permission. the only time this rule was relaxed was during the Queens jubilee when so many people were flying the Union Jack it would have been impossible to police, so the authorities turned a blind eye!!! Jane Bawn Portchester UK Nicky wrote: question is who are the ones being racist? why one rule for one and another for the home country? To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Subject: [lace-chat] Programmers or killers?
I got seven out of ten too, but wrongly convicted two programmers (erring on the side of caution) and would only have been dead once (which is all you need to be) :-) I have found this a really interesting test and have sent this to several people I know. Thanks for the linkTamara. Jane Bawn Portchester UK Date: Mon, 22 Mar 2004 08:55:56 - From: Jean Nathan [EMAIL PROTECTED] Subject: [lace-chat] Programmers or killers? I'd have been dead twice, and wrongly convicted one programmer. Seven out of ten isn't too bad for something like this, but doesn't this stray into the realms of the lady juror who, without considering any evidence, pronounced, He's obviously guilty of rape. Just look at the width of his shoulders. And Of course, he's guilty. His eyebrows meet in the middle. Jane Bawn email [EMAIL PROTECTED] [demime 1.01d removed an attachment of type application/ms-tnef which had a name of winmail.dat] To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Why you don't have to work your backside off
Received this in my mail today and thought it would be a good one to share. Hope it's appropriate from here. From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this: What makes 100%? What does it mean to give more than a 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give more than 100%. How about achieving 103%? Well, here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions: If the letters of the alphabet A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z were represented as: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26, then: H - A - R - D - - W - O - R - K would be: 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98% and, K - N - O - W - L - E - D - G - E 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96% but, A - T - T - I - T - U - D - E 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100% however - - B - U - L - L - S - H - I - T 2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103% And, look how far ass kissing will take you: A - S - S - - K - I - S - S - I - N - G 1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%. So, one can then conclude with mathematical certainty that: While, hard work and knowledge will get you close, and, attitude will get you there, it's... Bullshit Ass Kissing that will put you over the top! - Jane Bawn Portchester, UK To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] RE: spider pillow
Hi Tamara, This was going to be my next question. As it will be about next October by the time I finish my hearts lace edging I shall be just in time to hunt round the stores for some material to match. :-) BTW congratulations on achieving BL Editor of IOLI I'm sure as a result the membership will increase (by at least one from this neck of the woods at any rate) :-) Jane Bawn Portchester UK Date: Thu, 5 Feb 2004 22:36:51 -0500 From: Tamara P. Duvall [EMAIL PROTECTED] Subject: [lace-chat] Re: spider pillow On Feb 5, 2004, at 20:34, [EMAIL PROTECTED] (Lynn) wrote: I have just recently started to learn bobbin lace, how or where do you get the spider material to make the pincushion, I would love to try it. It's a long -- 18 months? 24? -- story... :) Pauline (Norris?), in UK, came accross very tacky -- red satin, with black spiderwebs and spiders - -- fabric... Bought all the store had, and offered to make and send pincushions -- filled with lavender grown in her own garden -- to anyone on Arachne who was willing to make a lace edging for it... Ended up making, I think, a hundred or two of them :) The earlier efforts can be seen on Lori-the-lace-fairy's website: http://lace.lacefairy.com/Arachne/Pincushions.html (this is the first page of 4, BTW) Lori then made a matching bobbin -- painted bright red, with black spiderweb and spider, and spangled with black and gold beads, with a red heart as the bottom bead... Typical -- to me -- of Arachne generosity, and the spontaneous interplay of ideas... My own -- duly edged -- pincushion, with Lori's bobbin, skewered to it by a gold spider (pushing the concept of tacky to the outmost limit g) is hanging off the dining room chandelier, except at Christmastime (when it's on my textile tree). But you can't get *the* pincushion anymore -- all that fabric is gone now. For fabric with spiderwebs (to make your own pincushion or a cover cloth), go to your nearest fabric store (for me, it's WalMart) sometime in September-October; that's when they're gearing up for Halloween... It has finally stopped snowing, now it's raining ice. Lovely...:) Our spell of freezing rain seems to be over for the day, and they are promising melting weather for tomorrow (or the day after, at the latest), but the film scheduled for tonight (Roman Polanski festival, at the U film-club) has been cancelled all the same... It's been the bleakest winter of my 31 experience of the South - - Tamara P Duvall Lexington, Virginia, USA Formerly of Warsaw, Poland http://lorien.emufarm.org/~tpd/ To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED] -- End of lace-chat-digest V2004 #19 * To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
