[TMIC] Sex
Some Interesting points have been brought up in this discussion, so I'm gonna chime in. Understand, I'm only speaking for myself, but there may be some points to ponder here. Ok, when I first got married again, and she came to Ohio, things went well the first night we were together, but, after I got to see her demeanor and attitude, things went quickly down the tubes. It didn't take long for her to tell me she hated me, and wished I was dead. I suppose part of that was because I forced her to go to work. In any case, with me, not all men, physical attraction was the main purpose to get involved. One needs to take time to find out what kind of person lives inside the one you want to tie up with, and, is that the same person that's projected to the world, or are they different? Are they one person at home, and another to the outside world. If so, then that's a phoney. Since this wonderful probelm of TM has so graciously decided to rule my life, I've begun to see that looks don't mean a helluva lot. Oh, not the physicality doesn't matter, but it shouldn't be uppermost. In your youth, maybe, but as you age, you take on a different outlook. I know for myself, attitude plays a big role. If your a weasel of a person, nothings gonna happen, no matter how hard I try, or what pill I take. If, and if, I feel the desire, and your receptive, possibly. Also, age plays a role in this. I find the oder I get, the less desire I have. As far as feelings go, meaning sensation, if my partner has diminished sensation, I'll do what it takes to try and get some back. It's like, if you don't use it, you lose it syndrome. Maybe that'll work, maybe it wont, but, if you have feelings for you partner, you'll at least try. Men have a way of thinking, well, I can't feel anything or if you can't feel anything, what's the use. Oh yeah, what about at least giving it a shot. Your mind may come into play here in that, you remember what it was like, maybe it'll be that way again. But, if you don't try. you'll never know. One thing I've found out through my trek in life is, men need to know they're needed, and women need to know they're loved. If those two needs are met, the rest should fall into place. If you love each other, then damnit, show it. It's never too late to experiment. Take those old tapes that are playing in your mind, instilled by parents who say, certain sexual techniques if you will, are taboo, and throw em in the shit can. There's nothing taboo about loving someone, and showing them that you do. I gotta do more thinking on this matter, but these are the thoughts that have been running through my mind since this subject came up. **Shop Popular Dell Laptops now starting at $349! (http://pr.atwola.com/promoclk/100126575x1222031056x1201446063/aol?redir=http:%2F%2Fad.dou bleclick.net%2Fclk%3B215910283%3B38350812%3Ba)
RE: [TMIC] Sex
Gunny: Even though you sometimes may ramble on...I think you made many really valid and important statements. This is a subject many of us avoid mainly because it is a private issue and we may be embarrassed to discuss. I as you can only speak for myselfI have basically zero feeling from the waist down and therefore when it comes to sex I cannot tell what I am doing without looking...and even with that being said Viagra is a must.That being said I have tried and continue to try to satisfy my wife as best I canmany times my wife is not interested because she knows I am doing it only for her (which is probably true)...therefore more times than not we end up doing nothingwe are still together and have been married 39 years...to me this is just another problem that TM has brought on...and perhaps neither one of us will leave the other after so long...but it obviously puts a major strain on our relationship...this probably sounds crazy but I would understand if my wife had an affairif the tables were turned I probably would...many for religous reasons will not like this answer and can choose to condemn it...but I cannot help the way I feel. Rob in New Jersey From: bgunny7...@aol.com [mailto:bgunny7...@aol.com] Sent: Thursday, June 25, 2009 10:03 AM To: Tmic-list@eskimo.com Subject: [TMIC] Sex Some Interesting points have been brought up in this discussion, so I'm gonna chime in. Understand, I'm only speaking for myself, but there may be some points to ponder here. Ok, when I first got married again, and she came to Ohio, things went well the first night we were together, but, after I got to see her demeanor and attitude, things went quickly down the tubes. It didn't take long for her to tell me she hated me, and wished I was dead. I suppose part of that was because I forced her to go to work. In any case, with me, not all men, physical attraction was the main purpose to get involved. One needs to take time to find out what kind of person lives inside the one you want to tie up with, and, is that the same person that's projected to the world, or are they different? Are they one person at home, and another to the outside world. If so, then that's a phoney. Since this wonderful probelm of TM has so graciously decided to rule my life, I've begun to see that looks don't mean a helluva lot. Oh, not the physicality doesn't matter, but it shouldn't be uppermost. In your youth, maybe, but as you age, you take on a different outlook. I know for myself, attitude plays a big role. If your a weasel of a person, nothings gonna happen, no matter how hard I try, or what pill I take. If, and if, I feel the desire, and your receptive, possibly. Also, age plays a role in this. I find the oder I get, the less desire I have. As far as feelings go, meaning sensation, if my partner has diminished sensation, I'll do what it takes to try and get some back. It's like, if you don't use it, you lose it syndrome. Maybe that'll work, maybe it wont, but, if you have feelings for you partner, you'll at least try. Men have a way of thinking, well, I can't feel anything or if you can't feel anything, what's the use. Oh yeah, what about at least giving it a shot. Your mind may come into play here in that, you remember what it was like, maybe it'll be that way again. But, if you don't try. you'll never know. One thing I've found out through my trek in life is, men need to know they're needed, and women need to know they're loved. If those two needs are met, the rest should fall into place. If you love each other, then damnit, show it. It's never too late to experiment. Take those old tapes that are playing in your mind, instilled by parents who say, certain sexual techniques if you will, are taboo, and throw em in the shit can. There's nothing taboo about loving someone, and showing them that you do. I gotta do more thinking on this matter, but these are the thoughts that have been running through my mind since this subject came up. Shop Popular Dell Laptops now starting at $349! http://pr.atwola.com/promoclk/100126575x1222031056x1201446063/aol?redir =http:%2F%2Fad.doubleclick.net%2Fclk%3B215910283%3B38350812%3Ba
Re: [TMIC] Sex
Just to hopefully offer encouragement to some, for me sensation did come back -- better than ever. I was really surprised the first time we tried after TM, and I can't remember how long that was, that my sensation then was not normal. It wasn't that I had no sensation, but it was a little off. For instance, at first when I used the bathroom I had to make sure the seat was up because it felt like I was sitting on the closed lid even though I wasn't. I hadn't even thought about that in relation to sex until that first time we tried, and I was surprised and dismayed. But my husband encouraged me to just keep trying and called it our therapy. :-) In addition to TM, though, age and being out of shape are other factors. Some of you may remember a long time ago an Ann Landers poll that showed many women enjoyed the cuddling and closeness as much or more than the act. There are times that we just enjoy that, too. I would encourage anyone not to give up on that part even if you can't go all the way. There are times I've avoided that physicality because I really didn't feel like sex, but I think that is a mistake. Sandy Siegel wrote a great article on this in one of the TMA newsletters -- let me see if I can find it...here it is: _http://www.myelitis.org/newsletters/v3n2/newsletter3-2-01.htm_ (http://www.myelitis.org/newsletters/v3n2/newsletter3-2-01.htm) BTW, past newsletters are all available at _http://www.myelitis.org/newsletters/index.html_ (http://www.myelitis.org/newsletters/index.html) I saw some about caregivers while searching for this one -- I know we discussed that recently, too. Barbara H. _http://barbarah.wordpress.com_ (http://barbarah.wordpress.com) **Shop Popular Dell Laptops now starting at $349! (http://pr.atwola.com/promoclk/100126575x1222031056x1201446063/aol?redir=http:%2F%2Fad.dou bleclick.net%2Fclk%3B215910283%3B38350812%3Ba)
Re: [TMIC] Short update on Jim 6/24
You are such a special person, Linda..Jeanne ---Original Message--- From: L T CHERPESKI Date: 06/24/09 23:22:03 To: cjb...@aol.com; tmic-list@eskimo.com Subject: Re: [TMIC] Short update on Jim 6/24 So good to hear that Jim is a bit better. We'll just need to pray that a bed becomes available and that these good doctors wean Jim off the ventilator and he is healed. Carol, calling your grandchildren your 4 little sunshines was so sweet - it put a great big smile on my face! Stopped just now and prayed for Jim, you, and all of your family and will continue to keep all of you in my thoughts and prayers. The bed will be there and much brighter days are on the horizon. Give Jim a gentle hug and please keep us updated. love, Linda - Original Message - From: cjb...@aol.com To: cjb...@aol.com ; tmic-list@eskimo.com Sent: Wednesday, June 24, 2009 8:28 AM Subject: [TMIC] Short update on Jim 6/24 Jim is doing a bit better, but I will be really feel better when he is on his way to the pulmonary fixing place. He has been accepted there but they do not have a bed as yet. We have heard good reports from there and believe they will be able to wean him off of the ventilator there. It is in Kalamazoo and so only 15 min from Cindy and Eric and our 4 little sunshines. I will stay nights at their house and will love it. Keep the prayers flowing. Love carol ps Jodi and Dave will be coming as well. Together our family can keep Jim working towards health, Huge Savings on Popular Laptops only at Dell.com. Shop Now! 01_tile.jpg01_side.gif
Re: [TMIC] Sex
Wow, Gunny! If I was single I just might hop a plane and come see you.. uhhh...just to meet you face to face, that is::)) (Just kidding but you should give classes on this very thing!! You are good!!) Jeanne ---Original Message--- From: bgunny7...@aol.com Date: 6/25/2009 9:03:23 AM To: Tmic-list@eskimo.com Subject: [TMIC] Sex Some Interesting points have been brought up in this discussion, so I'm gonna chime in. Understand, I'm only speaking for myself, but there may be some points to ponder here. Ok, when I first got married again, and she came to Ohio, things went well the first night we were together, but, after I got to see her demeanor and attitude, things went quickly down the tubes. It didn't take long for her to tell me she hated me, and wished I was dead. I suppose part of that was because I forced her to go to work. In any case, with me, not all men, physical attraction was the main purpose to get involved. One needs to take time to find out what kind of person lives inside the one you want to tie up with, and, is that the same person that's projected to the world, or are they different? Are they one person at home, and another to the outside world. If so, then that's a phoney. Since this wonderful probelm of TM has so graciously decided to rule my life, I've begun to see that looks don't mean a helluva lot. Oh, not the physicality doesn't matter, but it shouldn't be uppermost. In your youth, maybe, but as you age, you take on a different outlook. I know for myself, attitude plays a big role. If your a weasel of a person, nothings gonna happen, no matter how hard I try, or what pill I take. If, and if, I feel the desire, and your receptive, possibly. Also, age plays a role in this. I find the oder I get, the less desire I have. As far as feelings go, meaning sensation, if my partner has diminished sensation, I'll do what it takes to try and get some back. It's like, if you don't use it, you lose it syndrome. Maybe that'll work, maybe it wont, but, if you have feelings for you partner, you'll at least try. Men have a way of thinking, well, I can't feel anything or if you can't feel anything, what's the use. Oh yeah, what about at least giving it a shot. Your mind may come into play here in that, you remember what it was like, maybe it'll be that way again. But, if you don't try. you'll never know. One thing I've found out through my trek in life is, men need to know they're needed, and women need to know they're loved. If those two needs are met, the rest should fall into place. If you love each other, then damnit, show it. It's never too late to experiment. Take those old tapes that are playing in your mind, instilled by parents who say, certain sexual techniques if you will, are taboo, and throw em in the shit can. There's nothing taboo about loving someone, and showing them that you do. I gotta do more thinking on this matter, but these are the thoughts that have been running through my mind since this subject came up. Shop Popular Dell Laptops now starting at $349! 01_tile.jpg01_side.gif
RE: [TMIC] Sex
One of the greatest inventions ever has been Viagra and all of the rest of the 'helpers' and men should never, ever be ashamed to try them out. They truly work. We need to find one that helps women the same way. Viagra has been used and it seems to work with some women. I have been away from nursing for four years so there might be all sorts of things since then. I hope so. There is hardly anything that feels so good as uhh, well, you know .. Yes, the love and passion that comes with making love cannot be compared nor replaced. Put the two together and 'WOW'makes you want to get up and do your dishes or something!!!Jeanne :) ---Original Message--- From: Robert Pall Date: 6/25/2009 9:32:49 AM To: bgunny7...@aol.com; Tmic-list@eskimo.com Subject: RE: [TMIC] Sex Gunny: Even though you sometimes may ramble on...I think you made many really valid and important statements. This is a subject many of us avoid mainly because it is a private issue and we may be embarrassed to discuss. I as you can only speak for myselfI have basically zero feeling from the waist down and therefore when it comes to sex I cannot tell what I am doing without looking...and even with that being said Viagra is a must.That being said I have tried and continue to try to satisfy my wife as best I can... many times my wife is not interested because she knows I am doing it only for her (which is probably true)...therefore more times than not we end up doing nothingwe are still together and have been married 39 years...to me this is just another problem that TM has brought on...and perhaps neither one of us will leave the other after so long...but it obviously puts a major strain on our relationship...this probably sounds crazy but I would understand if my wife had an affairif the tables were turned I probably would...many for religous reasons will not like this answer and can choose to condemn it...but I cannot help the way I feel. Rob in New Jersey From: bgunny7...@aol.com [mailto:bgunny7...@aol.com] Sent: Thursday, June 25, 2009 10:03 AM To: Tmic-list@eskimo.com Subject: [TMIC] Sex Some Interesting points have been brought up in this discussion, so I'm gonna chime in. Understand, I'm only speaking for myself, but there may be some points to ponder here. Ok, when I first got married again, and she came to Ohio, things went well the first night we were together, but, after I got to see her demeanor and attitude, things went quickly down the tubes. It didn't take long for her to tell me she hated me, and wished I was dead. I suppose part of that was because I forced her to go to work. In any case, with me, not all men, physical attraction was the main purpose to get involved. One needs to take time to find out what kind of person lives inside the one you want to tie up with, and, is that the same person that's projected to the world, or are they different? Are they one person at home, and another to the outside world. If so, then that's a phoney. Since this wonderful probelm of TM has so graciously decided to rule my life, I've begun to see that looks don't mean a helluva lot. Oh, not the physicality doesn't matter, but it shouldn't be uppermost. In your youth, maybe, but as you age, you take on a different outlook. I know for myself, attitude plays a big role. If your a weasel of a person, nothings gonna happen, no matter how hard I try, or what pill I take. If, and if, I feel the desire, and your receptive, possibly. Also, age plays a role in this. I find the oder I get, the less desire I have. As far as feelings go, meaning sensation, if my partner has diminished sensation, I'll do what it takes to try and get some back. It's like, if you don't use it, you lose it syndrome. Maybe that'll work, maybe it wont, but, if you have feelings for you partner, you'll at least try. Men have a way of thinking, well, I can't feel anything or if you can't feel anything, what's the use. Oh yeah, what about at least giving it a shot. Your mind may come into play here in that, you remember what it was like, maybe it'll be that way again. But, if you don't try. you'll never know. One thing I've found out through my trek in life is, men need to know they're needed, and women need to know they're loved. If those two needs are met, the rest should fall into place. If you love each other, then damnit, show it. It's never too late to experiment. Take those old tapes that are playing in your mind, instilled by parents who say, certain sexual techniques if you will, are taboo, and throw em in the shit can. There's nothing taboo about loving someone, and showing them that you do. I gotta do more thinking on this matter, but these are the thoughts that have been running through my mind since this subject came up. Shop Popular Dell Laptops now starting at $349! 01_tile.jpg01_side.gif
Re: [TMIC] Facebook Page
there are several TM-ADEM-NMO groups on Facebook, most are linked here http://www.myelitis.org/support.htm Jim (who has become addicted to the Farm Town game on Facebook) At 06:43 PM 6/24/2009, Akua wrote: I'm digging Facebook--- what about creating a fan page. -- Jim Lubin jlu...@eskimo.com http://makoa.org/jim disAbility Resources: http://www.makoa.org
Re: [TMIC] Facebook Page
*Hi Jim, * *I'm afraid to even start Farm Town---I KNOW I'll get addicted...as it is, I already need to start attending Mahjong Addicts Anonymous meetings ;-) Gracie*
Re: [TMIC] Facebook Page
I'm on face book! to become a friend go to facebook.com/ mindy.chairweaver Mindy the Artist On Jun 25, 2009, at 10:33 PM, Jim Lubin wrote: there are several TM-ADEM-NMO groups on Facebook, most are linked here http://www.myelitis.org/support.htm Jim (who has become addicted to the Farm Town game on Facebook) At 06:43 PM 6/24/2009, Akua wrote: I'm digging Facebook--- what about creating a fan page. -- Jim Lubin jlu...@eskimo.com http://makoa.org/jim disAbility Resources: http://www.makoa.org
Re: [TMIC] Facebook Page
What is Farm Town? Janice - Original Message - From: Grace M. To: Jim Lubin Cc: Akua ; tmic-list@eskimo.com Sent: Thursday, June 25, 2009 9:53 PM Subject: Re: [TMIC] Facebook Page Hi Jim, I'm afraid to even start Farm Town---I KNOW I'll get addicted...as it is, I already need to start attending Mahjong Addicts Anonymous meetings ;-) Gracie
