Most
especially if said buddy is doing it without the knowledge and/or approval of
his SO.
From:
[EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of Tim Harder
Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2003
1:46 PM
To: The Sandbox Discussion List
Subject: Re: [Sndbox] now flirting
No need to explain yourself. What I am saying is...
For example.... If I knew a married buddy of mine was doing a
lot of flirting on the internet I would advise him not to. If he
said, "Hey.. I am just kidding around and I'll probably never
see these women." I would still say .... "Don't do it."
Present company excluded..... I would say that if you *met*
your SO on the computer... Then this rule applies double.
On Tuesday, September 30, 2003, at 12:07 PM, Angela wrote:
In
my case as long as its flirting, which most of the time is just in a crowd, he
doesnt care about my flirting, as long as he knows I'm not trying to seduce. I
think if he ever caught me flirting with the intent to seduce, he would
probably be quite upset and he should be. And the flirty emails are usually
nothing more than what goes on in here.
/smaller>/color>/fontfamily>
-----Original Message-----
From:
[EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]On Behalf Of Tim Harder
Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2003
12:55 PM
To: The Sandbox Discussion List
Subject: Re: [Sndbox] now flirting
/smaller>/fontfamily>I think it is cool that your husband doesn't mind that
you flirt via e-mail....
*But*, speaking from experience, it can and does cause trouble in many
instances. My enlightend opinion now is that it doesn't matter if *you*
think it is harmless or not.... It's what your SO thinks....
On Tuesday, September 30, 2003, at 11:01 AM, Angela wrote:
Now I agree flirting with the intent of seduction is wrong. I have always
thought it was wrong, but the flirting you and David do with Jackie or even
between you and Neecy can be considered harmless b/c it is done in a friendly
way. I have never flirted with strangers at a bar when I'm out with my friends
b/c I dont want to get into any situation I might not be able to get out of and
I dont want to give anyone the impression that I want to sleep with them (that
kind of flirting is reserved for hubby only *S*) but then again is it really
flirting when its with your SO? But if your intent isnt to seduce someone, just
to flirt and be nice, I dont see anything wrong with it. This guy and I in
another one of my groups flirt with each other all the time. Sometimes we even
flirt offlist, but then again I laugh about those emails and considering they
all come into my outlook and I have it on all the time, hubby could read them
at any time. And most of the time he does. There are times I have even gone so
far as to have him read the emails to me while I'm doing other things and have
him type out my reply, even with those flirtacious offlist emails, although he
does complain about that. But needless to say, if my intent was to seduce, I
wouldnt do it on outlook where he could see them at any time.....specially
considering he fusses at me all the time for not emptying my folders such as
sent items or deleted items. He was looking the other night and I had 3000 in
deleted items and 1500 sent items.
-----Original Message-----
From:
[EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]On Behalf Of Charles
Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2003
11:45 AM
To: 'The Sandbox Discussion List'
Subject: RE: [Sndbox] Pick one
(immorality glamorized)
Well as I said, it depends on what you call flirting. That’s always been
the problem when we discuss it on this list. Not everyone agrees on a
common definition. Both David and I told Jackie just the other day we
always ogle her. That could easily be called flirting, but the intent
wasn’t to sleep with Jackie as fun as that may be.
I see Neecy several times a year in person, and we flirt in our way, but
neither of us are interested in each other in a sexual fashion. So, I
would say that if you are flirting with the intent of seduction then it will
absolutely be wrong, and I can agree with Lowell it isn’t harmless. I
would even go so far as to say that it can lead you to that compromising
position that can result in cheating. So for that reason, it’s not all
harmless.
Again, it boils down to intent.
Charles Mims
http://www.the-sandbox.org
<image.tiff>
From:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
[mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On
Behalf OfAngela
Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2003
7:28 AM
To: The Sandbox Discussion List
Subject: RE: [Sndbox] Pick one
(immorality glamorized)
But anything you read say that simple flirting is harmless. Now I'm not talking
about going out and batting your eyelashes at another guy and putting your
hands all over him, but even being friendly and smiling and laughing at someone
elses jokes can be considered flirting. The important thing in any relationship
is know who you are going home with or to each night. This trade show I just
went to with hubby a few weeks ago, what I was doing with his companies
suppliers could have been considered flirting, simply because I was being
friendly and smiling and wasnt stiff if one of them hugged me or gave me a kiss
on the cheek. But that was all it was. I need to look up this article I was
reading a few months ago where it was talking about flirting and marriage. But
the basic overlook of the article was light simple flirting can be vital to a
relationship b/c it keeps things fresh. It said never take flirting to the
point of making your spouse jealous. It also stated that flirting is just a
simple part of human nature and some people do it without realizing it. Not
putting anyone down, but most of the casual banter in here between the men and
the women can be considered flirting. And in anyone I've ever asked, a strictly
online relationship is just as damaging to a relationship and can be considered
cheating as much as any physical relationship. So if you feel flirting is
wrong, then when you are online you should watch your comments (not directed at
you AJ, just a generalization). A couple weeks ago when Tim told David and I to
get a room, we were flirting with each other, but not in a way that either of
our spouses would probably think was wrong. Therefore it is harmless.
-----Original Message-----
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