If it
offended him or hurt his feelings, no I wouldnt do it. At least not consciously.
The joke in my family is that when I was born and the dr slapped me on the
bottom, I smiled and batted my eyelashes at him and started the flirting then
and there and it never stopped. I usually try to call it naturally outgoing
rather than naturally flirtacious.
But if it offended or hurt your husbands feelings
would you still do it?
AJ
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2003 11:11
AM
Subject: RE: [Sndbox] now
flirting
I
know what you mean. Thankfully I met hubby while still in high school. And
its not alot of flirting, just the occassional thing, like I told Charles I
think, basically like the type of stuff that happens in here. Playful banter
back and forth.
No need to explain yourself. What I am
saying is... For example.... If I knew a married buddy of mine was
doing a lot of flirting on the internet I would advise him not to. If
he said, "Hey.. I am just kidding around and I'll probably never see
these women." I would still say .... "Don't do it." Present company
excluded..... I would say that if you *met* your SO on the computer...
Then this rule applies double.
On Tuesday, September
30, 2003, at 12:07 PM, Angela wrote:
In
my case as long as its flirting, which most of the time is just in a
crowd, he doesnt care about my flirting, as long as he knows I'm not
trying to seduce. I think if he ever caught me flirting with the intent
to seduce, he would probably be quite upset and he should be. And the
flirty emails are usually nothing more than what goes on in here./smaller>/color>/fontfamily>
-----Original
Message----- From: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]On Behalf Of Tim
Harder Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2003 12:55
PM To: The Sandbox Discussion List Subject: Re:
[Sndbox] now flirting
/smaller>/fontfamily>I think it
is cool that your husband doesn't mind that you flirt via
e-mail....
*But*, speaking from experience, it can and does cause
trouble in many instances. My enlightend opinion now is that it
doesn't matter if *you* think it is harmless or not.... It's what
your SO thinks....
On Tuesday, September 30,
2003, at 11:01 AM, Angela wrote:
Now I agree flirting with the
intent of seduction is wrong. I have always thought it was wrong, but
the flirting you and David do with Jackie or even between you and Neecy
can be considered harmless b/c it is done in a friendly way. I have
never flirted with strangers at a bar when I'm out with my friends b/c I
dont want to get into any situation I might not be able to get out of
and I dont want to give anyone the impression that I want to sleep with
them (that kind of flirting is reserved for hubby only *S*) but then
again is it really flirting when its with your SO? But if your intent
isnt to seduce someone, just to flirt and be nice, I dont see anything
wrong with it. This guy and I in another one of my groups flirt with
each other all the time. Sometimes we even flirt offlist, but then again
I laugh about those emails and considering they all come into my outlook
and I have it on all the time, hubby could read them at any time. And
most of the time he does. There are times I have even gone so far as to
have him read the emails to me while I'm doing other things and have him
type out my reply, even with those flirtacious offlist emails, although
he does complain about that. But needless to say, if my intent was to
seduce, I wouldnt do it on outlook where he could see them at any
time.....specially considering he fusses at me all the time for not
emptying my folders such as sent items or deleted items. He was looking
the other night and I had 3000 in deleted items and 1500 sent
items.
-----Original Message----- From:
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
[mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]On Behalf Of
Charles Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2003 11:45
AM To: 'The Sandbox Discussion List' Subject: RE:
[Sndbox] Pick one (immorality glamorized)
Well as I said, it
depends on what you call flirting. That’s always been the problem
when we discuss it on this list. Not everyone agrees on a common
definition. Both David and I told Jackie just the other day we
always ogle her. That could easily be called flirting, but the
intent wasn’t to sleep with Jackie as fun as that may
be.
I see Neecy several times a year in person, and
we flirt in our way, but neither of us are interested in each other in a
sexual fashion. So, I would say that if you are flirting with the
intent of seduction then it will absolutely be wrong, and I can agree
with Lowell it isn’t harmless. I would even go so far as to say
that it can lead you to that compromising position that can result in
cheating. So for that reason, it’s not all
harmless.
Again, it boils down to
intent.
Charles
Mims
http://www.the-sandbox.org
<image.tiff>
From:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
[mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf
OfAngela Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2003 7:28
AM To: The Sandbox Discussion List Subject: RE:
[Sndbox] Pick one (immorality glamorized)
But
anything you read say that simple flirting is harmless. Now I'm not
talking about going out and batting your eyelashes at another guy and
putting your hands all over him, but even being friendly and smiling and
laughing at someone elses jokes can be considered flirting. The
important thing in any relationship is know who you are going home with
or to each night. This trade show I just went to with hubby a few weeks
ago, what I was doing with his companies suppliers could have been
considered flirting, simply because I was being friendly and smiling and
wasnt stiff if one of them hugged me or gave me a kiss on the cheek. But
that was all it was. I need to look up this article I was reading a few
months ago where it was talking about flirting and marriage. But the
basic overlook of the article was light simple flirting can be vital to
a relationship b/c it keeps things fresh. It said never take flirting to
the point of making your spouse jealous. It also stated that flirting is
just a simple part of human nature and some people do it without
realizing it. Not putting anyone down, but most of the casual banter in
here between the men and the women can be considered flirting. And in
anyone I've ever asked, a strictly online relationship is just as
damaging to a relationship and can be considered cheating as much as any
physical relationship. So if you feel flirting is wrong, then when you
are online you should watch your comments (not directed at you AJ, just
a generalization). A couple weeks ago when Tim told David and I to get a
room, we were flirting with each other, but not in a way that either of
our spouses would probably think was wrong. Therefore it is
harmless.
-----Original
Message-----
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