Hello Trudy (and Sally),
Your comments to Sally were very good, and also what I was thinking. I am
the one with TM and I am not always fun to live with. I know my husband gets
very irritated that TM came into our lives and changed it so much. It has
destroyed many of our dreams, but we still try to have a full life and do what
we can together. Life has to go on........
This past weekend was horrible for me, as I had one of my worst weekends of
pain that I've had. I was awake both nights moaning and groaning, and trying
to keep from screaming. I generally separate myself when this occurs and
go into another room so he can sleep. Unfortunately, it stopped, then started
up again, so I was with him. I hate for anyone to see me suffering like
that, it's not an easy thing to watch somebody spasm uncontrollably and not be
able to control their pain. I always leave the room when it happens. I then
am in bed till 11am or noon to try to at least get some sleep.
I am so fortunate that this generally only gets really bad for me a few
times per month, and only late at night. When it happens I always think of
the
people that have it so much worse than me and have to deal with this on a
regular basis. How they must have so much trouble handling the pain and mental
anguish. It is totally draining.
So he watches me, and tries to get it out of his mind and sleep. I know
it's not out of his mind. TM has changed our lives! He feels so helpless
when
this happens, and all he can do is get me something to try to make me more
comfortable. He tries!!!! And I love him for staying with me and trying to
make our lives as much of we had dreamed of as he can. He tells me that he
married me for better or worse, in sickness and health, and I'd do the same
for
him. And, I would.
There are so many things that I cannot do anymore that I have to count on
him for now. For the first 28 yrs of our marriage while we were raising our
children he didn't help with the housework or cooking at all, but now has
stepped up when necessary. Sometimes I tease him and tell him it's his
payback.
Everyone hang in there, we are all in this together.
Hugs to all, Barbara A in cold Auburn, CA
