You really did do what you had to and I know it's not fair, but I have
a quote I like to use for these situations:

Imagine if life was fair and the bad things that happened, did so
because we really deserve them to.

For what it's worth, my wife's great-grandparents live in (based on
what you told me I'm 99% sure) the same facility and it really is a
great place.
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