People get married after a drunken night in Las Vegas now.  There is no reason to prevent thousands of committed gay people from having the same legal rights that you do in your marriage simply because some frat boy  no common sense.

  ----- Original Message -----
  From: Haggerty, Mike
  To: CF-Community
  Sent: Tuesday, November 18, 2003 12:58 PM
  Subject: RE: You People

  Beth -

  I outlined scenarios that may seem far fetched but which could easily
  occur. Humiliating, degrading intiations into groups, drunken escapades,
  and finanical compulsion are all common occurances in America, they tend
  to be tied to high-risk, extraordinary activities, and the large
  majority of people out there consider these negative situations they
  want no part of.

  There is no reason to assume entering into a same-sex marriage would not
  be identified as within the realm of 'high-risk, extraordinary
  activities' for many people, given current societal expectations in
  large parts of the country. We live in a less-perfect society than some
  would like to think, and not all people's beliefs are as enlightened as
  your own.

  In this sense, the potential for abuse is real and concern is warranted.
  The remedy I suggested was not to disallow same-sex marriages, but to
  set the bar very high as a means of preventing people who aren't really
  interested in this kind of life from getting involved in it.

  For the record, I did not come up with any specific means of
  implementing such a bar, nor do I have an opinion as to where it should
  lie. People wishing to undergo sexual reassignment surgery are compelled
  to undergo counselling for a period of several months to several years
  and must be certified by several medical and psychological professionals
  prior to the operation. This is mainly because there is an insanely high
  rate of suicide amongst post-operatives stemming in part from the fact
  they are almost categorically denied a meaningful place in society after
  the operation, worldwide. Checks are in place to prevent people who
  aren't prepared to walk this path from ever going down it, and some
  system of checks should be in place for people choosing to enter a
  same-sex marriage.

  I am not saying this is right, I am not saying there is a legitimate or
  material difference between same-sex or traditional marriage
  arrangements. I am saying our identity is defined, to a large part, by
  who and what we choose to mate with and what society expects us to be
  mating with. The state must be sensitive to the practical application of
  any laws that challenge the majority's beliefs on what is morally right
  and wrong. Simply demanding the right to do something can lead to
  disasterous consequences for other people, and an official sanction of
  same-sex marriages without consideration of how to best implement them
  opens the door to a whole host of problems.

  This is about as sensitive to your position as I can be. Now, I am
  certain you can find things I said to go after me on, but this time
  please reserve your attacks to what I actually say.

  M

  -----Original Message-----
  From: BethF [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
  Sent: Tuesday, November 18, 2003 4:05 PM
  To: CF-Community
  Subject: Re: You People

  You outlined five really far-fetched ridiculous scenarios which aren't
  in any way different if the participants are same sex or not same sex.
  No wait marriages can easily be a vehicle for abuse NOW, it has nothing
  to do with the sex of the participants

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