Chris While I don't entirely agree with you, I have tried to understand what you are saying from your perspective - an impossible but worthwhile aspiration in any circumstances. It is always interesting (if often painful) to learn how others see one, and you clearly have a long memory for my defects.
But if I try to see the world from your side, I think it only fair that you try to see it from mine. For one thing, it is crystal clear that you have no inkling at all as to why a mere subscriber might take offence at attacks on the authors of the software, or that the use of certain terms might pain a reader, whoever they are used by and at whom directed. Where I see a world I only inhabit, you apparently see one which you want to control - no room there for diversity of comprehension, sadly. Whatever of that, I have at no time attempted to defend, excuse or justify my mistake - I have freely admitted it, and apologised for it. What is causing me the problem here is that I feel that I am being insulted and bullied, and I don't like it. The validity of your case (which I in no way dispute) is maligned by your rudeness and your threats, when the most I needed from you was your gentle reminder that my sarcastic one liners do not in fact help anybody's cause. I am at least two people - one of them wants simply to apologise and promise to try never to do something of the kind again, while the other is possessed by the need to assert that this is not because of being threatened. The anger which you hold makes resolution of this dichotomy impossible for me. You say that I have no right to be angry about the kind of post that initiated this thread, but I am not. I don't think you actually mean "right" here but, in any case, it is not anger that I have felt or feel now. Rather is there here another human who has his own life experience (clearly very much longer than yours, as it happens), and for whom the issue is rather one of hurt. And this human feels he has every "right" to be hurt - by the original poster, by your intemperate words, by your bullying behaviour. I have no clear idea as to why you think you will improve a situation by using threats and offensive language but doing so is your choice, just as it is my choice to continue to discuss the matter in spite of my risking being banned by doing so. I don't want to be banned, but neither do I want you or anyone else to think that I accept your threats as a valid basis for my behaviour choices. My closing position is that you are right that my action was childish (I believe I was the first to say so) and you are also right that I have erred in similar style in the past (which fact may indicate a personality defect similar to your own, although I believe we differ on which is actually poisonous). You are not right to bully or threaten me, not least because to do so is as ineffective and pointless as my childish remarks, and contradicts your own exhortation to be a nice person too. I have already apologised for causing the upset - I do so again now, without reservation. I will not enter into any contract not to fail in the same manner again as long as my doing so is conditioned by fear of the result, nor is there any need for me to do so since I have at no time attempted to justify this kind of action anyway and wouldn't perform it if I thought first. Your threats are empty, not because you won't carry them out but because they cannot achieve your purpose. If I have anything further to add to the thread, I will do so direct to yourself - notwithstanding that you have warned me against doing that too. Anyhow, it's late for Eid and early for Thanksgiving - tomorrow is the Birthday of the Bab so I wish all readers the most sincere greetings for that. Nick out… On 19 Oct 2010, at 00:30, Christopher Forsythe wrote: > Every time I started to type this email, I found myself not being able > to complete it, so I stepped away. I think you aren't reading what I'm > saying how I'm thinking it in my head, so I'm going to reiterate it in > a different manner. After this, this thread needs to die. If you are > confused, reread this. I will be as clear here as I am ever going to > be. > > When I thought about what kind of user you are to our community. I > came to the conclusion that you are verging on being a poisonous > person. Please see > http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4216011961522818645# if you > have not seen it already, it's an excellent talk about the type of > person I think you are verging on becoming. > > The reason I say this is due to a pattern in responses which have no > value, other than to be annoying. Here is a small list I found by just > searching for about 3 minutes, I stopped looking once I hit 4 emails: > > http://groups.google.com/group/growldiscuss/msg/a19a2ff6a84ebdd8 > http://groups.google.com/group/growldiscuss/msg/872c304048d33e0a > http://groups.google.com/group/growldiscuss/msg/74b285e15eb9ebf2 > http://groups.google.com/group/growldiscuss/msg/be17f47730a0cc5f > > Some common themes here are: > > - Lack of useful responses > - Sarcasm verging on starting a heated discussion on a thread > - Short responses > > This all said, you do provide some great feedback.When I found you > provided the best feedback it was about your specific problems though. > > You responded to this user first. The user does not have a way to > differentiate who represents the project, and who is merely a member > of this mailing list/discussion group. As such, you represented this > entire group. You did so in a very sarcastic manner, with none of the > following: > > - No quality control. > - No useful information to help the end user > - No helping at all > > > All of this to what end? No good one as far as I'm concerned. So no, I > do not believe you were wishing him a Merry Christmas. I know you were > in fact being a prick. Which is why I'm angry at you. You basically > just gave us a worse name to this user than we already had to him. > Which isn't a good place for us to be in, seeing how this can all be > avoided very easily. > > Now, instead, you could have taken these actions, and not come across > as someone who is simply out to make himself feel good for 2 seconds > for a childish act: > > - Responded with the link to the article about this issue > - Responded saying you understand, and providing details about how > dropbox is actually doing this, and then how to remove Growl > - Not responded at all > > These 3 responses at the very least would have been more beneficial > than the response you chose to make. > > Since you decided to send your sarcastic email to the list publicly, I > decided to reprimand you publicly. I will reiterate what I said > earlier. Do not respond to end users in this manner. They do not > deserve to be treated like this. We don't either, but their anger is > just, only not justly directed. You however have no right to be angry > about it, since it is not affecting you at all. > > I spent more time today thinking about this one thing than anything > else. I have a six month old son who is better behaved than you are on > this list. I'm not going to sit here and baby sit you, you need to be > an adult here. I also want this thread to end, unless the original > poster requires more assistance. However, since this thread was > derailed, I've already started a direct email with him so he doesn't > have to continue to deal with this. > > I have concluded that this is not acceptable behavior to tolerate for > these issues. If you respond to another user in a sarcastic manner > such as this, I will ban you. If you continue to make me have to > respond to you after being very clear in this email, I will also ban > you. If you choose to email me or any other member of the Growl > project directly to complain about this, I will ban you. Basically, > drop the issue, move on, and don't be a prick in the future, and we're > all set. > > As far as I'm concerned, this should not have been how this user was > handled. You made us look bad. You need to own up to that, and learn > from it. I don't want to think about it anymore. -- Nicholas J A Sanders ___________________ semiotek +44 [0]7092 153 409 [email protected] ___________________ -- You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Growl Discuss" group. To post to this group, send email to [email protected]. To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [email protected]. For more options, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/growldiscuss?hl=en.
