live in seattle and that seems to be tghe cach all phrase now. Me i'm still in the camp of you're just damn greedy with a side helping of boy could i have some of that.. but of the 3 situations that i know of they've been stable for more than 2years now. which is something to feel good about
On Sat, Apr 3, 2010 at 10:23 PM, Keith Johnson <[email protected]>wrote: > > > Fascinating. > I really wonder if poly relationships can truly ever be stable? As you say, > there are those who enter into them initially simply for the thrill, for the > excitement. And, once given the permission or chance to find NRE, some would > just become junkies of the excitement of finding new thrills all the time. > Seems to me it'd make it hard to build the bedrock relationship of trust and > true love --something not based on the physical, lust, new thrills--that are > required for a decades-long relationship. > I'm assuming here the goal is a lifetime partnership, which of course it > may not be for everyone. and if so, better to acknowledge and realize it. > Though a Christian with traditional views of marriage, I tell my friends all > the time that there are two things no person should feel obligated to do: > Get married, and have children. > > > ----- Original Message ----- > From: "Adrianne Brennan" <[email protected]> > To: [email protected] > Sent: Sunday, April 4, 2010 1:05:56 AM GMT -05:00 US/Canada Eastern > Subject: Re: [scifinoir2] "True Blood" Star Pacquin Comes Out on Video > > > > I have friends who are poly, and they manage to work it out nicely. I > personally think that an equal triad is the most stable poly relationship > out there, and with few exceptions they seem to thrive on relationship drama > with one person bouncing to a new person repeatedly for the "NRE" (new > relationship energy) that they crave when they get bored with someone else. > > I don't mean to be cynical; there are a lot of genuine, stable poly > relationships out there. But I also have met people who are poly for all the > wrong reasons and really ought to either be called "swingers" or "casual > daters". > > > ~ "Where love and magic meet" ~ > http://www.adriannebrennan.com > Experience the magic of the Dark Moon series: > http://www.adriannebrennan.com/books.html#darkmoon > Dare to take The Oath in this erotic fantasy series: > http://www.adriannebrennan.com/books.html#the_oath > The future of psychic sex - Dawn of the Seraphs (m/m): > http://www.adriannebrennan.com/dawnoftheseraphs.html > > > On Sat, Apr 3, 2010 at 11:51 PM, Mr. Worf <[email protected]> wrote: > >> >> >> The term open relationship is not what I was talking about. Open >> relationship implies that the partner is "sleeping around." Which is not >> what I was talking about. That is more like swinging which is sex without >> emotional attachments. >> >> I was talking about the creation of a triad (A couple plus one) >> relationship where there is a steady woman for Pacquin and she remains >> married. Poly (in its various forms) create a relationship bond between >> multiple people. A couple examples of this was used in scifi recently. >> Dr.Flox from Enterprise, and the teacher on Caprica. >> >> Basically the person spends time with another person other than her >> husband on an emotional level and may or may not include sex. >> >> With the teacher on Caprica they are all married. That is a polygyndry >> relationship or group marriage. >> >> >> >> >> >> On Sat, Apr 3, 2010 at 8:29 PM, Keith Johnson >> <[email protected]>wrote: >> >>> >>> >>> Oh, I get that works for some people. I'm just from the "one person at a >>> time/one person for life" school... >>> Personally I think unneeded complications can enter when people start >>> into sharing partners, having so-called "open" relationships, etc. But >>> again, that's just not my thing. >>> >>> >>> ----- Original Message ----- >>> From: "Mr. Worf" <[email protected]> >>> To: [email protected] >>> Sent: Saturday, April 3, 2010 11:06:05 PM GMT -05:00 US/Canada Eastern >>> Subject: Re: [scifinoir2] "True Blood" Star Pacquin Comes Out on Video >>> >>> >>> >>> Sexual attraction does not equate to love, however it is possible to love >>> more than one person at the same time. >>> >>> On Sat, Apr 3, 2010 at 5:02 PM, Keith Johnson <[email protected] >>> > wrote: >>> >>>> >>>> >>>> I'm not sure if that is normal or not, but it was my point, in cases >>>> where this is desired. My personal belief is in long term marriage for me >>>> and one other person. Hence, I'd be concerned if getting with someone who >>>> finds someone on the other side of the fence attractive: if those needs >>>> grow >>>> and must be met, that relationship to me is over. >>>> My views, for myself. This is no advice, judgement, or disapproval for >>>> anyone else's lifestyle... >>>> >>>> ----- Original Message ----- >>>> From: "Mr. Worf" <[email protected]> >>>> To: [email protected] >>>> Sent: Saturday, April 3, 2010 6:18:05 PM GMT -05:00 US/Canada Eastern >>>> Subject: Re: [scifinoir2] "True Blood" Star Pacquin Comes Out on Video >>>> >>>> >>>> >>>> This is something that needs to be discussed at the beginning of the >>>> relationship so there aren't any surprises. If one's partner is bi then >>>> there should be arrangements made that allows him or her to be with a >>>> person >>>> that they are interested in outside of the marriage without reprisal. >>>> >>>> On Sat, Apr 3, 2010 at 7:26 AM, Keith Johnson < >>>> [email protected]> wrote: >>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> There's insecurity, true. But, as I asked in my long post to Adrianne, >>>>> if a straight person were to get into a relationship with a bi person, is >>>>> it >>>>> realistic or fair to expect that bi person to be happy forever? Let's >>>>> leave >>>>> judgement and prejudices about gay or bi promiscuity out of it, as I don't >>>>> subscribe to those thoughts. >>>>> What I'm saying is, if my mate finds women as attractive as men, can >>>>> she really be happy with just me for the rest of her life? I believe in >>>>> marrying for life; again, not a judgement or moral standing. It's just my >>>>> preference. I absolutely think marriage isn't for everyone. But if I'm in >>>>> it >>>>> for the next 40 or 50 years, can I be assured my wife, who is bi, will be >>>>> cool living the straight life only for that long? Isn't that asking her to >>>>> deny a whole half of her needs? >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> ----- Original Message ----- >>>>> From: "Mr. Worf" <[email protected]> >>>>> To: [email protected] >>>>> Sent: Friday, April 2, 2010 8:39:59 PM GMT -05:00 US/Canada Eastern >>>>> Subject: Re: [scifinoir2] "True Blood" Star Pacquin Comes Out on Video >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> What you are talking about is insecurity. The fear is that the person >>>>> who is bi will leave the other person for someone of the same sex. (ie. >>>>> they >>>>> are really gay) That is a myth. The flip side of that is there another >>>>> myth >>>>> that the person that is gay is secretly straight. Both cloud the real >>>>> issue >>>>> of insecurity. >>>>> >>>>> The cure for insecurity is trust. I don't expect folks in this group to >>>>> totally understand what I'm talking about because this group isn't an >>>>> alternative sexuality one, but I know what I'm talking about. >>>>> >>>>> On Fri, Apr 2, 2010 at 2:30 PM, Keith Johnson < >>>>> [email protected]> wrote: >>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> Sorry, not mine. I've never understood why anyone would want to be >>>>>> with someone who's not totally "committed". It's hard enough to have to >>>>>> keep tabs on an attractive, famous person being faithful to you on one >>>>>> side >>>>>> of the fence. I wouldn't want to be worried about someone being >>>>>> attracted to >>>>>> both sides. >>>>>> >>>>>> But I hear what you're saying. >>>>>> >>>>>> By the way, I've known some guys who've been involved in those >>>>>> situations, and no matter how cool and with-it they claimed to be ahead >>>>>> of >>>>>> time, they always had issues when the women sometimes enjoyed each other >>>>>> without the dude. It was a combination of things. One, once the dude's >>>>>> passion dies down and he's thinking again, he always freaks out a bit >>>>>> when >>>>>> realizing this person is actually enjoying being with someone of the same >>>>>> sex. And two, they actually weren't as cool about sharing their mate with >>>>>> someone as they thought, even though they thought it would be less >>>>>> difficult >>>>>> with another woman. >>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> ----- Original Message ----- >>>>>> From: "Mr. Worf" <[email protected]> >>>>>> To: [email protected] >>>>>> Sent: Friday, April 2, 2010 3:00:17 PM GMT -05:00 US/Canada Eastern >>>>>> Subject: Re: [scifinoir2] "True Blood" Star Pacquin Comes Out on Video >>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> She's bi. Not gay. She still does men. Why would they be disappointed? >>>>>> This would fuel some men's fantasies of a 3way. :) >>>>>> >>>>>> On Fri, Apr 2, 2010 at 10:27 AM, Keith Johnson < >>>>>> [email protected]> wrote: >>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> Didn't know or even suspect this about Pacquin. I'm sure there will >>>>>>> be a lot of disappointed men out there now! >>>>>>> >>>>>>> As for Ricky Martin: file it in the "Worst Kept Secret" folder. I >>>>>>> think Clay Aiken's dossier was already in there... >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> *************************************************** >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> 'True Blood' Star Anna Paquin Uses Surprising Medium to Reveal Sexual >>>>>>> Orientation By Mike Ryan | Thursday, April 1, 2010, 5:04 PM >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> Anna Paquin >>>>>>> Jordan Strauss/WireImage >>>>>>> >>>>>>> Hot on the heels of Ricky Martin's >>>>>>> announcement<http://new.music.yahoo.com/blogs/stopthepresses/132331/ricky-martin-i-am-a-fortunate-homosexual-man/>on >>>>>>> his personal blog that he's gay, "True >>>>>>> Blood <http://tv.yahoo.com/true-blood/show/39147>" star Anna >>>>>>> Paquin<http://tv.yahoo.com/anna-paquin/contributor/29335> used >>>>>>> an unusual >>>>>>> medium<http://omg.yahoo.com/news/anna-paquin-i-m-bisexual/38428>of her >>>>>>> own to announce that she is bisexual. >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> Alongside celebrities such as Elton >>>>>>> John<http://tv.yahoo.com/elton-john/contributor/59894>, >>>>>>> Clay Aiken <http://tv.yahoo.com/clay-aiken/contributor/1207678>, and >>>>>>> Wanda Sykes <http://tv.yahoo.com/wanda-sykes/contributor/52103>, >>>>>>> Paquin declared her sexual >>>>>>> orientation<http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/03/exclusive-true-blood-star-reveals-true-self-anna-paquin-says-shes-bisexual>in >>>>>>> a public service announcement for Cyndi >>>>>>> Lauper <http://tv.yahoo.com/cyndi-lauper/contributor/37182>'s Give a >>>>>>> Damn Campaign <http://www.wegiveadamn.org/upgrade/>, which promotes >>>>>>> equality for the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender community. Two >>>>>>> videos were shot in Los Angeles on January 30 and were released April 1 >>>>>>> at 9 >>>>>>> a.m. EST. >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> What makes 27-year-old Paquin's spot particularly surprising is that, >>>>>>> unlike some of the other openly gay celebrities involved in the >>>>>>> campaign, >>>>>>> the actor had never before discussed being bisexual. According to >>>>>>> RadarOnline.com, even people at the shoot were surprised when Paquin >>>>>>> made >>>>>>> the revelation. >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> A second PSA features "Sex and the >>>>>>> City<http://tv.yahoo.com/sex-and-the-city/show/205>" >>>>>>> actor Cynthia >>>>>>> Nixon<http://tv.yahoo.com/cynthia-nixon/contributor/771088>(who came >>>>>>> out in 2006 <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cynthia_Nixon>), Jason >>>>>>> Mraz, Kim >>>>>>> Kardashian<http://tv.yahoo.com/kim-kardashian/contributor/2220832>, >>>>>>> and Sharon <http://tv.yahoo.com/sharon-osbourne/contributor/790868>and >>>>>>> Kelly >>>>>>> Osbourne <http://tv.yahoo.com/kelly-osbourne/contributor/790850>. >>>>>>> >>>>>>> Paquin follows an interesting trend of celebrities forgoing the >>>>>>> traditional "coming out" People magazine interview -- à la Clay Aiken >>>>>>> and Lance >>>>>>> Bass <http://tv.yahoo.com/lance-bass/contributor/49638> -- and >>>>>>> instead controlling the message themselves. Ricky Martin buried his >>>>>>> announcement at the bottom of an otherwise banal blog post, and now >>>>>>> Paquin >>>>>>> is using her announcement to drive attention to a cause she supports. So >>>>>>> much attention, in fact, that servers at wegiveadamn.org crashed >>>>>>> shortly >>>>>>> after<http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/04/video-gay-rights-website-crashes-after-anna-paquin-bisexual-bombshell>the >>>>>>> news broke of Paquin's statement. >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> Paquin -- who at age 11 became the second-youngest Oscar winner in >>>>>>> history when she won for best supporting actress for "The Piano" -- has >>>>>>> been >>>>>>> notoriously shy about discussing her private life and has never before >>>>>>> discussed her sexuality. In 2007, she was romantically >>>>>>> linked<http://omg.yahoo.com/news/anna-paquin-i-m-bisexual/38428>with >>>>>>> actor Kieran >>>>>>> Culkin <http://tv.yahoo.com/kieran-culkin/contributor/32918>. In >>>>>>> August 2009, she and "True Blood" costar Stephen >>>>>>> Moyer<http://tv.yahoo.com/stephen-moyer/contributor/44265>announced >>>>>>> their engagement. >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> The Give a Damn campaign is part of Cyndi Lauper's True Colors Fund >>>>>>> (named after her popular 1986 song and album). Lauper is currently >>>>>>> promoting the >>>>>>> cause<http://www.nbc.com/the-apprentice/contestants/cyndi-lauper/charity.shtml>during >>>>>>> her turn on the Donald >>>>>>> Trump <http://tv.yahoo.com/donald-trump/contributor/1028501>-judged >>>>>>> show "Celebrity >>>>>>> Apprentice<http://tv.yahoo.com/the-apprentice/show/35539>." >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> -- >>>>>> Celebrating 10 years of bringing diversity to perversity! >>>>>> Mahogany at: >>>>>> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/mahogany_pleasures_of_darkness/ >>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> -- >>>>> Celebrating 10 years of bringing diversity to perversity! >>>>> Mahogany at: >>>>> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/mahogany_pleasures_of_darkness/ >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>> >>>> >>>> -- >>>> Celebrating 10 years of bringing diversity to perversity! >>>> Mahogany at: >>>> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/mahogany_pleasures_of_darkness/ >>>> >>>> >>>> >>>> >>> >>> >>> -- >>> Celebrating 10 years of bringing diversity to perversity! >>> Mahogany at: >>> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/mahogany_pleasures_of_darkness/ >>> >>> >>> >>> >> >> >> -- >> Celebrating 10 years of bringing diversity to perversity! >> Mahogany at: >> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/mahogany_pleasures_of_darkness/ >> >> >> > >
