[lace] Horror Kit?
Is this the 'Horror Kit'? I've noticed it on US ebay several times lately. http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItemcategory=19158item=81785891 03rd=1 or search for item number 8178589103 Jean in Poole - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Re: [lace] Horror Kit?
At 12:30 AM 3/18/2005, you wrote: Is this the 'Horror Kit'? I've noticed it on US ebay several times lately. http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItemcategory=19158item=8178589103rd=1 or search for item number 8178589103 Yes -- that is the culprit. Alice - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] what's plonk
In message [EMAIL PROTECTED], Margot Walker [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes On Thursday, March 17, 2005, at 05:34 PM, [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: Plonk is a term we use for the type of wine that you can clean a toilet with. Ooooh, I wouldn't go that far. To me, plonk is not the greatest, but drinkable and cheap. We tend to describe it as paint-stripper - and it definitely doesn't improve with age - drinkable to teenage daughters, definite yukk to us! -- Jane Partridge -- No virus found in this outgoing message. Checked by AVG Anti-Virus. Version: 7.0.308 / Virus Database: 266.7.3 - Release Date: 15/03/2005 - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] V A
I phoned the V A today, it seems they don't have a clue when the lace and textile galleries will be open again. Apparently because they had quite a few phone enquiries they have had study days under security. I have been told that they will email me when their next study day is, perhaps more people should email the V A and ask when are the textile galleries going to be open. There is a special exhibition of the Arts Crafts. Plus Customs owned by Queen Maude of Norway, they are in the costume gallery on the ground floor. These will be on display until January next year. Plus there is another exhibition City Fashion around the world. So please find out what is happening at the V A before deciding to go. Jean - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] IOLI Convention
This will probably sound really stupid to most of you (if so it'll give you a laugh), but the last time I went out of the UK was in 1959, when I walked out of a wooden shed, across the tarmac and up a short flight of steps onto a 36-seater plane to go to Austria. That was the one and only time I got on an aircraft - the trip was prearranged to fly there and train and ferry back. I seriously considered going to Denver, but, apart from not knowing if I'd have an RA flare up just before or while there, other questions arose. 1. Would I need something to prove that I have a steel knee joint? Would it set of the metal detectors at airports? I assume they have them because I've seen people in films, etc walk through an arch which sets of a detector if they have anything metal on them. 2. What would be the reaction at US customs (or even the airlines) to me carrying 11 different prescription drugs? Don't fancy being turned back or arrested. 3. Would I get travel insurance - I understand my only hopes would be Saga or Age Concern ( or it might be Help the Aged)? They're just the more sensible questions, so in the end I decided that it was just too much hassle (at least in my mind) and I'm not going. Jean in Poole - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] Re bookmark tails.
On Mar 17, 2005, at 8:53, [EMAIL PROTECTED] (Christina) wrote: My favorite project is bookmarks..but I have problems with the ends. My braids just don't come out right! Any suggestions on books that give directions on making nice braids and tassels. When I make tassels on the end of bookmarks I simply tension all but the two outside pairs down into the center, then take the two outside pairs under the others from left to right and right to left ( they are now on opposite sides to where they started ).Now all you need to do is cross them at the front take them around underneath again, bring them to the top and tie in a reef knot. Works every time for me. Shirley in Corio Oz. - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
RE: [lace] Bookmark tails
I don't know about books, but I always end my bookmarks by 1) work the last pinhole 2) set aside the weavers from both sides, lift all the other bobbins in one hand, cross the weavers. Lay the rest of the bobbins down and tie a reef knot with the weavers. Then I do one of the following (after doing a bit of untangling if the bobbins look very messy - how much depends on how eager I am to start the next project!) a) Split the bobbins into 3 more or less even groups and make a plait with the threads b) take one of the weaver pairs and use it to make buttonhole stitches (or half hitches) round the rest of the threads for as long as makes a decent tassle or you get totally fed up! I use a fine crochet hook for this c) continue taking the two weaver pairs and crossing behind the rest of the threads, while knotting in the front. This makes a criss cross braid. With each of these when I get to the end I take all the threads and tie a single knot in the bunch before cutting off. If you give a short time I'll put an example of each on webshots Viv -Original Message- From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of [EMAIL PROTECTED] Sent: 17 March 2005 13:54 To: lace@arachne.com Subject: [lace] Bookmark tails My favorite project is bookmarks..but I have problems with the ends. My braids just don't come out right! Any suggestions on books that give directions on making nice braids and tassels. Christina in VA - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED] - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Fw: [lace] Bookmark tails
Hi Cristina Have a look at this site: http://perso.wanadoo.fr/aplimouzin/torchon/ . In the torchon course you will find a bookmark, with step by step explanations, and also how to make the end, with the tail, etc. Hope it is useful for you. Greetings from Antje González, in Guadalajara, Spain http://es.geocities.com/antjeglezherrero/ - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] Bookmark tails
A year or so ago, I detailed several methods of finishing bookmark tassels for a new lacemaker. If that person is still on the list, and has the file, please send it back to me so I can send it to Christina. I cannot find it in my files right now. It would be nice if I didn't have to rewrite it all. Thanks so much. Alice In Oregon - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] for Canadian lacers
This is for our Canadian lacemakers. Hampstead House Books www.hhbooks.com is offering Sandi Woods Special Effects in Lace for $8.99Cdn. Shipping is $4.99 for one book. HH books has never before offered a lace book, this is a first, but I have ordered many books from them before and their service is excellent. I just about wet myself when I saw this one at such a price :) I have no idea whether or not they ship out of country. Sharon on rainy Vancouver Island -- No virus found in this outgoing message. Checked by AVG Anti-Virus. Version: 7.0.308 / Virus Database: 266.7.4 - Release Date: 3/18/05 - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Re: [lace] free day at convention
I am beginning to think maybe we need a convention within a convention, sort of a lace boot camp for people who want to live cheaply and work intensively at the convention to bring in the younger people. I think that's what the Harrisburg group was trying to do, but they met with such fierce anger from some of the oldtimers that didn't want their convention tampered with. Robin P. [EMAIL PROTECTED] Los Angeles, California, USA - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Re: [lace] IOLI Convention -location, location - and price
Devon said, Actually, I think this thread is good because it illuminates the difficulties experienced by the convention planners and helps to control expectations. I agree, AND I really haven't picked up a huge sense of immense frustration, just some what about this kind of statements. After what I think many regard as a very disappointing convention last hear (where many of us stayed away in droves...), I think we're mainly giddy with excitement to be back to normal, with a few well-conceived new bells and whistles - not the least of which is the Arachne Luncheon!! So it suggests to me that as a group, our informal group has a lot of impact. Last year, we spent a lot of time grousing about the arrangements, and lots of people made up their minds about whether to go based on information they had gleaned from our postings. I don't think I'm being naive to say that a lot of this year's organizers are also members of Arachne. So our complaints, compliments, suggestions, and opinions were not falling on deaf ears. Certainly, we're already seeing that someone was listening - to us as Arachnids? - maybe... to us as members of IOLI? not as easily done, actually. Our democratic process works, but I wonder if our Arachne forum isn't doing more than we realize? So I say, let's continue to speak up when we have ideas and suggestions. Let's don't muzzle each other. And for heaven's sake, let's continue to disagree when we want to! But we need to continue to be nice. Remember, don't embarrass your Mother. ; ) Lordy, I'm excited about Denver!! Clay Clay Blackwell [EMAIL PROTECTED] [Original Message] From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] To: lace@arachne.com Date: 3/17/2005 2:09:29 PM Subject: Re: [lace] IOLI Convention -location, location - and price In a message dated 3/17/2005 1:30:45 P.M. Eastern Standard Time, [EMAIL PROTECTED] writes: May I propose a new subject? Favorite Lace Convention Memory! OK. My favorite lace convention memory is when I turned to the person on my left at the banquet and said, I can't imagine why they chose this hotel and she said, It is the only hotel in town that has a room that can seat 300 at a banquet. :-) Actually, I think this thread is good because it illuminates the difficulties experienced by the convention planners and helps to control expectations. Devon - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED] - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Re: [lace] Re: Bookmark tails
The way I end bookmarks: I do patterns that come to a central point at the bottom, leaving pairs out along the two slanted edges. I take the outermost pair from one edge and CTC through all the other pairs on that side. Place a support pin just below the point of the lace, unwind enough of the remaining thread on that bobbin so it hangs of the end of the pillow/table, and leave it. Take what's now the outermost pair on that side and CTC through everybody but the pair you just worked (was outermost, now is hanging at the center), lay it over the support pin and unwind enought thread for it to hang. Do this to all the pairs on that side. Then do the same thing on the other side, with another support pin for those pairs at they arrive in the center. Now designate two bobbins from that hanging bundle to be the wrappers. Lift them and cross above the others, then lay them outside the bundle. Pick up the bundle in one hand, cross the wrappers underneath. Continue crossing the wrappers above and below the bundle, pulling the wraps reasonably snug (you're not trying to imprison a person, but you want it smoothe) each time. When I have enough wraps for my taste, I tie the wrappers together in a square knot and half (right over left, then left over right, then right over left) and let the wrappers hang with the rest of the bundle. After at least 24 hours (to get the kinks out of the thread so it'll hang straight), I cut off the bobbins. If (as often the case) there was a different-color edge pair or edge gimp, I use those to wrap. Otherwise, it doesn't matter which two bobbins you use, as long as you continue using only those two for the whole wrapping. You can be fancier about the final knot. Before wrapping, take a third bobbin from the bundle and lay it atop the lace, so there's a loop from the bottom of the bookmark, down along the bundle of threads a little ways, and then back up. When you're done wrapping, the loop should be below the wraps and the bobbin attached to that thread is above the wraps. Drop each wrapper (in its appropriate direction) through that loop and lay the wrappers with the rest of the bundled bobbins. Now gently pull on the bobbin that's sitting on the lace, to pull the loop up inside the wrapping. The wrapper threads will be pulled inside there, too, securing them. Cut off the bobbin you just pulled up (the one that made the loop) close to the top of the wrapping and there will be no knot in the tassle. Robin P. Los Angeles, California, USA (formerly Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania) [EMAIL PROTECTED] - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Re: [lace] Mechlin terminology
Hello Julie I don't have that book but I think I can answer some of your questions In Section 1, Thienpondt does not define the stitches. Linen stitch is a standard name, I assume it's cloth stitch CTC Half-stitch is a standard name, I assume it is CT Twisted stitch I assume is...is well, that's where I have a problem. I have no idea what twisted stitch is. Thienpondt does define a complicated stitch Plait of 4 bobbins(Ground stitch?) as CTCTCTCTT and the picture looks like half-stitch-colored line with two twisted-stitch-colored lines attached to it. So maybe twisted stitch is CTCTCTT? (It was good that Thienpondt was explicit about the ground stitch. I feel all revved up to start the first exercise, which is just a bunch of ground stitches.) You are right that Mechlin round is CTCTCTCTT. The extra twist just separates each short length of plait. This ground is only found in Mechlin and so is the means of identifying Mechlin from other Flemish laces. In Section 1 Thienpondt refers to a ring pair. What is that? I think she doesn't mean the gimp. A ring pair is found in Binche, Flanders, Mechlin etc, and again you are right in thinking it's not a gimp thread. Look closely at the designs and you will see cloth stitch motifs and the mechlin ground. Surrounding the cloth stitch areas there will be one double stitch - CTCT - with an extra twist between it and the cloth stitch. The position of the extra twist will vary depending on whether that double stitch is to the side, above, below or diagonal to the cloth stitch, but the overall effect is that a pair (not always the same two threads) goes all the way around the cloth stitch motif. In Section 2, Thienpondt says: b Making an in- or output with a picot (see techniques). Techniques are Section 1. I looked there and saw on page 15 a detailed thread diagram of a picot; it looked just like the picot I use in Bucks Point. There were lots of twists, then an entanglement, then two twists afterward. I looked carefully at all the loops by the gimp in the photograph of the worked exercise on the first page of Section 2, but none of these loops looked like picots. They all looked to me as if the pair had just been twisted twice and a pin put under it. So where are the picots that Thienpondt referred to? Not sure what type of picot is used for mechlin - it may be the double picot as used in Bucks or it could be a twisted picot as in most Binche, which is just several twists on the pair and both threads are looped around a pin in the same way as the first part of a Bucks picot. Personally I've found that that will work for left hand picots, but for right hand picots the threads need to be crossed several times instead of being twisted, though I believe that Flemish lacemakers do use the twisting method on both sides. Brenda http://www.argonet.co.uk/users/paternoster/ - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] Myras Threads
A friend wrote to me with this question: I have a problem. I am trying to contact Mayra's Threads and they do not respond. Have you heard anything on the internet? Does anyone know if Mayra is away or has computer problems? thanks, Janice Janice Blair Crystal Lake, 50 miles northwest of Chicago, Illinois, USA - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] IOLI Denver
Jean asked: 1. Would I need something to prove that I have a steel knee joint? Would it set of the metal detectors at airports? I assume they have them because I've seen people in films, etc walk through an arch which sets of a detector if they have anything metal on them. Probably but I bet they are used to things like that by now. They would probably wave a wand around your knee to verify that is where the detector has found something. 2. What would be the reaction at US customs (or even the airlines) to me carrying 11 different prescription drugs? Don't fancy being turned back or arrested. Prescription drugs are okay. Pack them in your carryon so that they don't get lost. Maybe bring a prescription with you in case you mislay them. 3. Would I get travel insurance - I understand my only hopes would be Saga or Age Concern ( or it might be Help the Aged)? Can't help you with that question. My MIL used to get her insurance through someone else at her retirement apartment complex. They're just the more sensible questions, so in the end I decided that it was just too much hassle (at least in my mind) and I'm not going Jean, this might be the best year for anyone to come to the US with the dollar being so low, visotrs from England are always astounded at how cheap food and clothes, etc., are over here. I have a trip to France in May and another to England in June and am sure we will be complaining about the costs of everything whilst we are there. Janice Janice Blair Crystal Lake, 50 miles northwest of Chicago, Illinois, USA - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] Re: Horror Kit?
On Mar 18, 2005, at 3:30, Jean Nathan wrote: Is this the 'Horror Kit'? I've noticed it on US ebay several times lately. http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll? ViewItemcategory=19158item=81785891 03rd=1 or search for item number 8178589103 Yup, that's it, though tarted up some (the one I contemplated and passed up 16 yrs ago, didn't have the nice photo g). The price is pretty horrific, too, and that's before postage, Pay-Pal charges, etc... Buying a decent kit from a reputable vendor (Van Sciver, Lacy Susan, Lacemaker, Snowgoose, to name a few in no particular order of preference) might cost twice as much, but would give you 4 times the value, so it'd be a much better bargain. -- Tamara P Duvallhttp://t-n-lace.net/ Lexington, Virginia, USA (Formerly of Warsaw, Poland) - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] IOL Convention w/prescription drugs
Jean writes 2. What would be the reaction at US customs (or even the airlines) to me carrying 11 different prescription drugs? Don't fancy being turned back or arrested. When I used to travel with prescription drugs I was told it was important that they be in the bottles in which they come from the pharmacy and to which the label is affixed naming the drug and prescription info. Putting them in another bottle or container was frowned upon. Devon - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace] Re: lace-digest V2005 #89
A student came up with (accidentally) an interesting method for the ending braid on a bookmark: she unwittingly worked 10 stick, well known amongst Honiton devotees, and it was lovely. See Sue Thompson's book if instructions are required. Just reverse every now and then, make to the length desired, knot and cut off. Bookmarks are great, and I always have at least one of April Linds' Torchon designs ready for gift giving. Alison Addicks Rice, WA - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Re: [lace] Jean to USA/IOLI
From: Jean Nathan [EMAIL PROTECTED] 1. Would I need something to prove that I have a steel knee joint? Nah, they'll check you carefully and may look for the operation scar, but if you're concerned, just get your doctor to write a note on his letterhead that you have one. 2. What would be the reaction at US customs (or even the airlines) to me carrying 11 different prescription drugs? The last time we were in England, it was for 3 months so I had to take lots of medications 'cause I require many prescriptions - I had a special small bag - sort of a big purse with medications, prescriptions, and medical info such as doctor's name, diagnosis, etc. (we nurses are sticklers for detail) Be sure all your medication is in its proper prescription bottle and any OTC (over the counter) drugs are in their original containers. Have a paper copy of the prescriptions on your person. Carry all drugs in carry on baggage. 3. Would I get travel insurance - I understand my only hopes would be Saga or Age Concern ( or it might be Help the Aged)? When our relatives and friends come from England, they always get a health insurance policy from their travel agency. It is relatively inexpensive, so I'm told, and should you get ill and require medical treatment in the USA, it is VERY expensive. And it is possible that one may not be allowed to leave the US if a bill is owed. They're just the more sensible questions, so in the end I decided that it was just too much hassle (at least in my mind) and I'm not going. Aw come on Jean, I will be looking forward to meeting you! Go for it, Girl! It won't be difficult, you'll see! Happy Lacemaking, Betty Ann Rice in Roanoke Virginia USA Jean in Poole - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED] - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Re: [lace]Comments re Convention
Yes, Clay and Others, I very dismayed at last year's planning for Convention and chose not to go (I think the word used was boycotted). I complained to the Convention Committee, posted to Arachne, and most important of all, wrote to the IOLI Board with suggestions concerning a change in the By Laws that gives the IOLI Board more control over the Convention organization. I am pleased to say that there is now a Convention Oversight Committee chaired by IOLI Vice President. Any changes made in the Convention plans will have the approval of our IOLI Board (through the V.P.) and we can't complain with that. Hooray! My main objection to last year's Convention was that one might want to take classes only offered the first of the week, have to pay to shop the other days of the week, and loll around the hotel to attend the IOLI Business meeting at the end of the week. Very poor planning in anybody's opinion. We have officers that we elect to head IOLI and I know they listen to us. They may be on the List or not, and I'm sure they don't want to have to go look at the Handbook to see if a commenter is a member of IOLI. Therefore, IOLI members write/post to our officers if you have a plus or minus to say. Remember, they appreciate our positive comments as well as the negative. Hey, they run the show without monetary gain, just our undying gratitude. Can't wait for Convention this year...And, I like it the way it is... Happy Lacemaking Betty Ann in Roanoke, Virginia USA Clay wrote: After what I think many regard as a very disappointing convention last hear (where many of us stayed away in droves...), So it suggests to me that as a group, our informal group has a lot of impact. lots of people made up their minds about whether to go based on information they had gleaned from our postings. Certainly, we're already seeing that someone was listening - to us as Arachnids? - maybe... to us as members of IOLI? not as easily done, actually. Our democratic process works, but I wonder if our Arachne forum isn't doing more than we realize? - To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Piecework and surnames
I've just picked up the March/April issue of Piecework from my newsagent. I haven't had time to read it but I have flipped through it from front to back. The last page is a feature, called Portrait. This month features Tricia Wilson Nguyen who is an embroiderer and owner of Thistle Threads. the name seemed familiar and then I read a message from arachne member Sylvie Nguyen. Is this combination of interest in textile crafts and surname purely a coincidence or are you related? Patricia in Wales [EMAIL PROTECTED] To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] Re: [lace] what's plonk
In article [EMAIL PROTECTED], Jane Partridge wrote: We tend to describe it as paint-stripper - and it definitely doesn't improve with age - Moving to chat. Grappa deserves the accolade of paint stripper, smells like it too. Eve London, UK. To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] :) Fwd: The golf match
Splutter! went my my drink all over the keyboard, when I saw this one :) Enjoy! From: R.H. Shortly after the Pope had apologized to the Jewish People for the treatment of Jews by the Catholic Church over the years Ariel Sharon, the Prime Minister of Israel, sent a proposal to the College of Cardinals for a friendly game of golf to be played between the two leaders or their representatives to demonstrate the friendship and ecumenical spirit shared by the Catholics and the Jews. The Pope then met with his College of Cardinals to discuss the proposal. Your Holiness, said one of the Cardinals, Mr. Sharon wants to challenge you to a game of golf to show that you are old and unable to compete. I am afraid that this would tarnish our image in the world. The Pope thought about this and since he had never held a golf club in his life asked Don't we have a Cardinal to represent me? None who plays golf very well, a Cardinal replied. But, he added, there is a man named Jack Nicklaus, an American golfer, who is a devout Catholic. We can offer to make him a Cardinal, and then ask him to play Mr. Sharon as your personal representative. In addition to showing our spirit of cooperation, we will also win the match. Everyone agreed that this was a great idea. The call was made. Of course, Nicklaus was honoured and he agreed to play as a representative of the Pope. The day after the match, Nicklaus reported to the Vatican to inform the Pope of the result. This is Cardinal Nicklaus. I have some good news and some bad news, Your Holiness, said the golfer. Tell me the good news, Cardinal Nicklaus, said the Pope. Well, Your Holiness, I don't like to brag, but even though I have played some pretty terrific rounds of golf in my life, this was the best I have ever played, by far. I must have been inspired from above. My drives were long and true, my irons were accurate and purposeful, and my putting was perfect. With all due respect, my play was truly miraculous. How can there be bad news? the Pope asked. Nicklaus sighed I lost by three strokes to Rabbi Woods -- Tamara P Duvallhttp://t-n-lace.net/ Lexington, Virginia, USA (Formerly of Warsaw, Poland) To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[lace-chat] :) Fwd: Microsoft TV Dinner
Another splutter... :) And bit of smugness, as I own a Mac (and a whole different set of problems g) From: M.A. Instructions for Microsoft's TV Dinner: You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing so you agree to accept Microsoft rights to the TV dinner. You may not give anyone else a bite of your dinner as outlined in the TV Dinner Piracy section of the user agreement. You may, however, let others smell and look at your dinner and are encouraged to tell them how good it is. If you have a PC microwave oven, insert the dinner into the oven. Set the oven using the command line: mstv.dinn.//08.5min@@50%heat// Then enter: ms//start.cook_dindin/yummy|/yum~yum:-)gohot#cookme If you have a Mac oven, insert the dinner and press start. The oven will set itself and cook the dinner. If you have a Unix oven, insert the dinner, enter the ingredients of the dinner, the weight of the dinner, the desired level of cooking, and press start. The oven will calculate the time and heat and cook the dinner exactly to your specification. Be forewarned that Microsoft dinners may crash, in which case your oven must be restarted. This is a simple procedure. Remove the dinner from the oven and enter: ms.no.good/tryagainagain/again.crap This process may have to be repeated. Try unplugging the microwave and then doing a cold reboot. If this doesn't work, contact your hardware vendor. Many users have reported that the dinner tray is far too big, larger than the dinner itself, having many useless compartments, most of which are empty. These are for future menu items. If the tray is too large to fit in your oven you will need to upgrade your equipment. Dinners are only available from registered outlets, and only the chicken XP variety is currently produced. If you want another variety, call MicrosoftHelp and they will explain that you really don't want another variety. Microsoft Chicken XP is all you really need. Microsoft has disclosed plans to discontinue support for all smaller versions of their chicken dinners. Future releases will only be in the larger family size. Excess chicken may be stored for future use, but must be saved only in Microsoft approved packaging. Microsoft promises a dessert with every dinner after Chicken XP. However, that version has yet to be released. Users have permission to get thrilled in advance. Microsoft dinners may be incompatible with other dinners in the freezer, causing your freezer to self-defrost. This is a feature, not a bug. Your freezer probably should have been defrosted anyway. No other company is allowed to create items to be used with Microsoft dinners without first partnering with Microsoft. This is solely to protect the consumer and is not intended to impede progress and creativity in the dinner industry. This includes, but is not limited to dessert. You may not play a game or use an application while you eat your Microsoft dinner unless that game or application was designed by a Microsoft partner and is certified by Microsoft to be 100% compatible with your Microsoft dinner. You are only leasing your Microsoft dinner, you agree to not reverse engineer your Microsoft dinner or send it out of the country. You may store one backup Microsoft dinner for personal use. -- Tamara P Duvallhttp://t-n-lace.net/ Lexington, Virginia, USA (Formerly of Warsaw, Poland) To unsubscribe send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] containing the line: unsubscribe lace-chat [EMAIL PROTECTED] For help, write to [EMAIL PROTECTED]