Curtis, I assumed you had access to the e-mail. It was made known to me by way of confronting me as a liar. In other words, Bob Price was challenging me to deny what was in that e-mail from Barry: since, if the e-mail were true, it made a shambles of my integrity. So I gave Bob Price an unqualified denial that what was in that e-mail was veracious. I am not certain to what extent he immediately believed me; but, judging by his recent posts at FFL, it seems he reposed confidence in me and not in the truth of what Barry sent him.
I urge you to solicit Bob on this; so you can read for yourself what Barry has said you told himabout me. This is an open and shut case. There is no ambiguity here. If Barry falsely used you to try to deter Bob from further attacks on him (Barry), then it is despicable, but humanly understandable. Barry became desperate I guess, because Bob, who once lauded Barry, seemed now to be turning on Barry. As if Bob Price had transferred allegiances. I don't know how significant this Zimmerman Telegram is in the long run, and of course I have no say in the matter of what Bob chooses to do with it. But I will say this: Bob was determined to out me if I was a liar, and if I had not had the opportunity to deny the contents of that e-mail, my reputation would have been severely compromised. Because, were it true, it means I was fucking around big time. And could not be trusted. >From all that you have said you have said about me in your correspondence with >Barry, I doubt there is any sense of betrayal here whatsoever. You have just >given Barry your experience as it developed over time. However, for Barry to >traduce this trust, and somehow use you as the unimpeachable source of a fact >about me that makes of me a liar, well that is serious business indeed. I doubt Bob Price would generally divulge the content of private correspondence between him and Barry. However, if the matter touched my personal honourand I was, by virtue of that missive, seen to be a hypocrite and a dissemblerthen of course, since Bob Price has taken favourable notice of our recent posts, he would think very differently of me. Perhaps if you read said e-mail, it can clear up this whole thing. I believe Bob Price to be, despite what you say here, a honourable man. I feel he is determined to play fair in this whole matter. Although of course once he decided to accept my testimony that Barry's e-mail was a lie, he was offended by Barry'swhat I must believe to bedesperate deceitfulness. As for the rest of what you cover in your response here, I will now reread it and see if there is anything for me to say. Maybe this whole thing is for me to find out that Barry is a beautiful guy, and this is just the painful way I am going to eventually find this out. The e-mail he sent to Bob Price suggests that Barry had indeed in the past exercised some influence over Bob Price, and that now, when he found Bob Price was taking my side in this dispute, he was furious and even even a little unhinged. The e-mail was designed to expose me as a scoundrel. Cliff Notes won't do it for me. We and our correspondence are Cliff-Notes proof. This eight month conversation (if I can call it that) is the most boisterous, vigorous, intense, fearless, and no holds barred conversation I have ever hadover an extended period of time. And if I were a very young boy, and I got a hold of these posts that constitute this running dialogue, I would be entranced; yes, I would certainly be. And I would want to know the principals. You are much more seriously invested in this whole matter of Robin and Curtis than you would ever let on to poor Barryor anyone. I sense this, Curtis. We are more than intrigued with each other. Something good is going to come out of this. I promise you. Robin --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "curtisdeltablues" <curtisdeltablues@...> wrote: > > Robin, > > I wish you had given your own summary. I thought mine was remarkably > balanced. I could have stacked the deck so much higher. If you try it you > might appreciate how many punches I pulled. > > I can't ever bully you because there is no power differential. > > In true mean girl fashion, Bob has sent the email to you but no one sent it > to me. But that doesn't really matter because I re-read my original > correspondence to Barry in July when I was trying to figure you out. It was > slanted toward Barry but nothing for me to be ashamed of concerning you. I > find the whole deal distasteful in intention. > > Including that awful Bobbie! Did you SEE the "I am a slut" skirt she wore > today! OMG it was so rank. Why doesn't she go to that place that > inseminates my mares at the riding school, hook her up to the stirrups and > say "Give me your best stallion boys, I'm ready for the high hard one!" I > mean as if she could ever get any boy at this academy with her non Lancome > eyeliner (K-mart cosmetics!) and her non Dolce Gabbana EVERYTHING! She > wouldn't know a DG top if you tied it around her neck with a Jon Bennett > garret and choked her with it! Anyhooo guess who thinks someone else is > "whatever"? I don't want to gossip but it turns out that the two big buddies > are not such big buddies after all! Time to give back the separated heart > necklaces they shove in our faces and have a cat fight! Anyway, you didn't > hear this from me..." > > I just threw up on my mouth a little, sorry. > > My agenda? Expressing myself freely in the context of understanding where > someone else who has the same agenda is coming from. And using the > discussion as an outlet for some comedic bits that inhabit my brain. In the > end hopefully everyone goes home with a laugh and feeling understood. (I get > it that I have failed with you on the second part, but oh well, it wasn't > from lack of effort on my part.) > > I don't believe "bullshitter" is appropriate. I have been far more earnest > and transparent than that here. You allowed me to reveal who I am, perhaps > more than anyone here. I am not covering myself with virtues, I am showing > honestly that I am flawed to the core. And revealing my belief that everyone > is in the same boat, we really are just talk'n here no matter how seriously > we take our own POV. (And I take mine seriously.) > > I have really enjoyed the challenge of our interactions and your positive > enthusiasm for them. It was just a shapshot in time on our POVs but, > imperfect as it was, at least we put in the time and effort. The fact that > anyone else enjoyed reading them at all is a wonder and makes me happy in a > different way from the joy of expression. > > Thanks for listening to my music and your kind words. I am in the process of > writing my 3rd CD right now and have my first song of the 6 originals I will > include as usual. > > I am gunna read less into your Michael Jackson reference than I did your Gaga > reference. > > Even banging yourself is ALWAYS better than cutting the lawn. (I am assuming > this was a reference to the painful experience of getting a Brazilian. So > I've heard. Seriously, that is the only way I would know. Oh come on, I saw > Steve-O get one on Jackass for God's sake!) > > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, maskedzebra <no_reply@> wrote: > > > > Dear Curtis, > > > > Brilliant and just summation. Thank you. Reading this had the effect of > > reliving the entire correspondence between us: both at FFL and offline. I > > was apprehensive at first, thinking you would be tempted to debunk the > > whole thingyou know:the Jr High Thing; but, thank God, you were true to > > the "sheer joy" you confessed was your experience in posting with Robin. > > > > You are one crazy man, Curtis. No one has ever caught up to you. And what > > you are about in writing posts like this one, is beyond fathomingexcept > > that you like to play against yourself. I must assume, from what you have > > said, that our correspondence, then, has nothing in it of what you take > > with you to sing the blues. This must be the case. As I doubt you would > > trifle with something as existentially sacred (for you) as that. > > > > I resent profoundly your ridiculous and mischievous caricature of meand > > even of yourself, although it is clear, were I reading this, and knew > > nothing about either Robin or Curtis, I would find myself siding, > > obviously, with the Curtis guy. > > > > You have drawn the crudest cartoon of our conversation, even as you will > > say, in your response to this, Hey, Robin! I was only fulfilling the Cliff > > Notes request of tartbrain. What did you expect me to do? If I can poke fun > > at myself in this act, why are you so serious and uptight that you can't > > take some pleasure in what I have pulled off? Robin, you are too much of a > > fucking Puritan or something: for Christ sake: lighten up! I was just > > having some merry fun here. No harm done, big guy. > > > > You're out of control, Curtis. But that's not translatable in ways that > > anyone but you could understand. I take back nothing of what I have said to > > you over the past eight months; I only am adding some elements which make > > of you something more complex and profound than I even thought you were > > when you just elicited love and awesome enjoyment from deep inside of me. > > > > Why not stop the game, Curtis Baby. You are brilliant and hilarious and > > strong and wise. What the fuck is going on with your mocking, taunting, > > teasing, bullying, sabotaging, manipulating, invading, overpowering? > > > > Curtis: I have no fucking idea what you are talking about, Robin. Why don't > > you go back to your Virgin Mary and your screwed up mystical theatre and > > get a life. I summarized our dialogues at FFLand my estimation of what our > > offline correspondence meantand I did not feel I impugned its integrity in > > any way whatsoever: Hey, Robin: Remember irony? You use it all the time. > > You're just a bit slow and ponderous this morning. Get some of that Curtis > > caffein into you; then you'll be ready to rock and roll with me. I love > > you, Robin Baby. > > > > You move everywhere and in every direction in every moment. No one has ever > > pinned you down, Curtis. And do I admit to being bested by you? Well, of > > course I do.At least by one definition: I don't understand your agenda. > > And I don't think anyone doesalthough most everyone here at FFL will be > > sure that Robin has overshot the mark here. Fine. I am talking about where > > you really are at when it comes to going through death. Something like that. > > > > I think you a bullshitter, Curtis, but a bullshitter who covers himself > > with truth, with morality, with dignity, with the most ferocious integrity > > I have ever known. > > > > And do I still love you? You bet. But I will not give any quarter. And we > > shall see whether your POVand your secret and lethal modus > > operandifinally does away with meat least here at FFL. I have no desire > > to continue to post at FFLexcept that I will get stronger, and that I can > > get tested. You've done a pretty goddamn good job of providing this > > function since the very beginning, But is it ever heating up now. > > > > Hi, Curtis, my man. You are still here. That's good. I don't think you have > > the faintest idea of what I am all about. But know one thing: I don't and > > won't play with my final sincerity. No way. You do it all the time. Still, > > when all is said and done, you just might be right, and I in comparison at > > leastmore wrong. I mean about everything. > > > > The Zimmerman Telegram has been finally shown to me. It demonstrates either > > pure dishonesty and mendacity on Barry's part; or, if I am take him at his > > word, the same with regard to yourself. Germany telling Mexico to make war > > on the United Statesbecause, the accusation is that the US has been lying > > to Mexico. > > > > Your comments in response to that e-mail that Bob Price confronted me with, > > indicate either 1. total ignorance about what Barry sent to Bob Price; or > > else 2, cunning obfuscation and reality distortion. > > > > No matter what I have said here, Curtis. I still think you about the most > > marvellous character I have met. I think you a perfect (but very very > > subtle) asshole for writing as you have to tartbrain. Nevertheless I > > understand this is how you play fast and loose with reality. As if, in > > making love to the woman you adore, you get up and say: Well, that beats > > cutting the lawn, doesn't it, baby? > > > > By the way, when I watch and listen to you play the blues, I feel and > > experience something preternaturally powerful and riveting. It is like no > > other musical experience I have hadalthough Michael Jackson in his prime > > has a kind of strangely beautiful and haunting effect on me. Can I take > > your music, Curtis, and make it into muzak? > > > > Well, one thing is clear: we are finally getting to know each other. > > > > From one motherfucker to another motherfucker, > > > > Robin > > > > > > > > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "curtisdeltablues" > > <curtisdeltablues@> wrote: > > > > > > Why doubt your impression Tart? If there was something of value for you > > > in our conversation you would have already found it and tossed it back to > > > us in your own clever style. A Cliff notes summary would kill the value > > > of the dialogue for me,which is the ride, not the destination. > > > > > > Here you go: > > > > > > Robin believes that God existed and communicated his relationship to man > > > through the birth of Jesus and the Catholic church with Thomas Aquinas > > > being the go to guy for the details of that relationship. > > > > > > Curtis does not believe that there is adequate evidence for this claim or > > > how one might be able to distinguish this God idea as the right one out > > > of all the thousands man has proposed. > > > > > > Robin believes that God changed his relationship to man in the 40' with > > > the bombing of that monastery and is no longer answering his phone. > > > > > > Curtis finds this even more of a stretch than the first claim. > > > > > > Robin believes that there are significant issues with the theory of > > > evolution (although he generally accepts it) and that it is improperly > > > being used as a justification for materialistic reductionism in science. > > > > > > Curtis says that the theory of evolution gives him a boner hard enough to > > > drive in nails if a hammer was not available. (These are MY Cliff notes > > > so there is gunna be at least one boner reference, OK?) > > > > > > Robin believes that Curtis lacks the ability to fully take on someone > > > else's POV but instead runs his own routine over the person as if their > > > POV didn't exist. > > > > > > Curtis believes that his powers of understanding other people's POVs are > > > so far beyond the creator of the universe, that God himself appears like > > > a provincial yokal with a native New Yorker having just arrived at Grand > > > Central Station. > > > > > > God as rube: "Where all them TV stars live, I come here to see em." > > > > > > NYC native. "It is customary for you to bring a watch as a gift when > > > visiting our TV stars. (Opens coat revealing selection) Here are the > > > approved watches available at a discount to make sure you are well > > > received at the star's homes. > > > > > > God (what a dipshit!) "Well OK then if you say so. I'd better buy a > > > bunch cuz Ma has her heart set on seeing a whole slew of them stars." > > > > > > And scene. > > > > > > I think that about covers it, I hope Robin doesn't feel misrepresented. > > > There was some pseudo gay banter that livened up the exchanges > > > considerably, but if you aren't a fan of the filler, you wont enjoy those > > > exchanges either. > > > > > > Don't sweat it Tart. There may only be some "there" there for a select > > > few. And if it is only this select few who gains admittance into heaven > > > for all of eternity, and if those who can't appreciate the lofty nature > > > of these exchanges spend eternity in a place with the climate of Iraq in > > > the Summer (but because of the fires it is a dry heat so DC is still > > > worse than hell in August) then so be it. I'll send you some postcards > > > (written on asbestos) to entertain you from time to time. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, tartbrain <no_reply@> wrote: > > > > > > > > Not said with any agenda, snarkiness or irony, rather a sincere > > > > question, but what do you, raunchy and judy obtain from these > > > > dialogues. I would answer for myself, but to be honest, after repeated > > > > attempts, I cannot get past the first paragraph of the half dozen or so > > > > exchanges I have attempted to fathom. > > > > > > > > In reading any new author or exchange, I, at least in the back recesses > > > > of my mind, am asking, "is there any 'there' there?" I am sure there > > > > is, as you and others testify. But each long densely packed paragraph > > > > that I attempt, my (perhaps lazy) mind rebels and asks "Oh Lord, where > > > > is the 'there' there". I feel like I am at the beginning of an > > > > intellectual wild goose chase -- and abort the mission. > > > > > > > > Sometimes I think they are advanced zen or dochzen masters in disguise, > > > > playing with us, taunting us, and the sole purpose of their dialogues > > > > is the totally and completely still the readers mind. That has happened > > > > to me. Twisted,flayed, stretched and twisted, parched in a desert dry > > > > of any familiar meaningfulness, after a paragraph my mind (and this is > > > > my limited mind, mind you, not a generalized observation, "holy shit, I > > > > totally give up, I want to go home Right Now and rest in the vast void, > > > > beyond this intense cacaphony of dense mind states. Abort ALL systems, > > > > Abort mind immediately." > > > > > > > > I have faith in Curtis' intellectual skills and background (and more > > > > broadly his artistic/intuitive sensitivities) in that if he is finding > > > > value in the exchanges, there must be some "there" there. Though to be > > > > honest, at times I can't follow him too far down, what appears to me to > > > > be a rabbit hole, in his long discourses with a few other sparing > > > > partners. But in whole, I enjoy his insights and style. > > > > > > > > That said, and I ask sincerely, can one or all of you provide some some > > > > cliff notes, a cartoon version, a list of key points, an annotated > > > > version (like needed to read James Joyce or Sarte) of what themes, > > > > ideas, insights that you find of value in these dialogues. (This is not > > > > a loaded question.) > > > > > > > > > > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "seventhray1" <steve.sundur@> > > > > wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Ditto on that. Sending my thanks to both of them for an intriguing > > > > > and > > > > > enlightening discussion. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, "raunchydog" <raunchydog@> > > > > > wrote: > > > > > > I've been quietly lurking, reading most of Curtis and Robin's posts. > > > > > It's a lot to wade through but it's worth the effort. Their > > > > > conversation > > > > > invites me to get in synch with their thought processes and experience > > > > > the unfolding of their deeply felt, yet, uniquely intellectual > > > > > approaches to reality. The brain power between them could light up a > > > > > city. > > > > > > > > > > > > The only sport my Dad enjoyed watching on TV was boxing, so very > > > > > > early > > > > > on I learned to cheer evenly matched opponents. Busker Boy Curtis in > > > > > Boxer-Blue shorts vrs. Fancy Pants Robin in Cardinal Red pantaloons > > > > > are > > > > > evenly matched heavy weights. Jabs, hooks, one-two punches, he's up, > > > > > he's down and so far it's a draw! Thanks for tickets to ring-side, > > > > > guys. > > > > > Ding! > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
