We have 4 children - one did not co-sleep and three have. Our one year old is in a bed beside ours to give us extra space. Our relationship is stronger than it has ever been. My partner is very content with our arrangement that we developed together. He enjoys having the baby beside him at night. his view is that he gets to spend so little time with the kids during the day there is something special about having her cuddle up to us at night.
In terms of sex, well, frankly, it is not the highlight of our life at the moment. Not because we are co-sleeping but because I am breastfeeding and am never particularly interested during that time. Is it an issue for us? I have to say not at all. We are intimate, just not at it like rabbits. We have been together now for 17 years and our relationship has never been stronger. My husband has a wonderfully close relationship with all our kids which is not specifically to do with co-sleeping. Co sleeping is part of a whole package of how we choose to bring our children up. If we had the baby in a separate room I really don't believe we would be any more intimate. If I was up for several hours each night trying to settle the baby it certainly would not do anything for our relationship. We feel that for us, me being exhausted all the time would put additional stress on our relationship. He has always managed to "sleep" through the kids crying and has never been keen on pacing the floor with them. If anything, if I had to do the settling while I watched him sleep I would be resentful towards him which would cause more problems. This is a formula that works for us. Not one I would advocate for anybody else.Knowing what works for your children and your relationship is what is important here. Not some prescription that should work universally for everybody. Nikki Macfarlane ----- Original Messa ge ----- From: "Sylvia Boutsalis" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> Sent: Friday, March 19, 2004 7:10 AM Subject: RE: [ozmidwifery] sleep stuff > I don't mean to be judgmental in relation to co-sleeping but I am > curious about what happens to the couples relationship? I am not a > selfish person but I do regard my bed time to be something shared with -- This mailing list is sponsored by ACE Graphics. Visit <http://www.acegraphics.com.au> to subscribe or unsubscribe.
