My relationship with my husband is a cross between you two, Jan and Patti.   
We celebrated our 39th wedding anniversary while
   I was still in the hospital and now it is 41 years.  He is truly my hero. 
Life-changing illnesses really seem to be able to make or break a
   marriage/relationship and TM is no exception.  Some of us have been so 
fortunate and others have really suffered through a
   bad break-up while dealing with TM.   We all are at such different levels of 
TM, yet we all are able to communicate, comiserate,
   and identify with each other.    No matter what our situation is, I think we 
all fill a void for each other that TM leaves in that we are the only ones we 
can talk to that understand the disease and how it leaves you to deal with it's 
damage.
                                  Janice
  ----- Original Message ----- 
  From: Patricia Cooley 
  To: 'Jan Hargrove' ; 'transverse myelitis' 
  Sent: Saturday, June 13, 2009 2:04 PM
  Subject: RE: [TMIC] Relationships


  JAN

   

  I USE MINE TO CARRY ALSO. BUT, I ALSO HAVE A TRAY THAT I CAN PUT ON MY 
REGULAR WALKER TO CARRY STUFF.  IN THE BEGINNING, I HAD TO SIT ON THE SEAT IF I 
WANTED TO DO ANY COOKING.  NOW SINCE I AM ABLE TO WALK WITHOUT A WALKER OR CANE 
(I SHOULD SAY WADDLE LIKE A DUCK) I DON’T USE THE SEAT ANY MORE.  I AM ALSO 
ABLE TO STAND AT THE STOVE AND SINK.  I FEEL THE MORE I WALK AND STAND THE MORE 
EXERCISE I GET AND HOPEFULLY THE STRONGER I WILL BECOME.

   

  EVEN WITH ALL THE HELP WALKERS GIVE , I THANK THE LORD EVERYDAY FOR MY 
HUSBAND.  I DON’T WANT TO THINK I WOULD DO WITHOUT HIM AND MY DAUGHTERS.

   

  TAKE CARE AND  TIAD

   

  PATTI - WISCONSIN

   

  From: Jan Hargrove [mailto:jmh1...@sbcglobal.net] 
  Sent: Saturday, June 13, 2009 12:24 PM
  To: 'transverse myelitis'; Patricia Cooley
  Subject: RE: [TMIC] Relationships

   

        Frank does so much..........he makes certain I don't overdo, he's kinda 
like my 

        conscience, cause I think I can do more than I'm really capable 
of.........Patti, 

        you mention your walker with a seat........I use mine for carrying 
stuff, i.e. laundry,

        dishes etc,  Frank says it's been worth much more than we paid for it!!!

        janh  !!!!!!!!!TIAD !!!!!!!!!!!

        --- On Sat, 6/13/09, Patricia Cooley <patticoo...@wi.rr.com> wrote:

           

          TM HIT ME ON OUR 45TH WEDDING ANNIVERSARY.  THAT IS A DATE NEIGHER OF 
US WILL FORGET.  MY HUSBAND WHO NEVER DID ANY COOKING, LAUNDRY, ETC., HAD TO 
TAKE OVER ALL THE HOUSE WORK AND THE OUTSIDE WORK.  WHEN I FIRST CAME HOME FROM 
THE HOPITAL AFTER 6 WEEKS, I WAS FORTUNATE THAT MY SISTER, NIECES, AND 
DAUGHTERS LOADED US UP ON MEALS WE COULD PUT IN THE FREEZER WHICH TOOK CARE OF 
US FOR ABOUT A MONTH. BILL, MY HUSBAND, HAD TO LEARN TO DO THE LAUNDRY, SOME 
COOKING AND EVERYTHING ELSE.  AFTER A MONTH, A WAS ABLE TO HELP WITH THE 
COOKING IF I SAT IN MY WALKER WITH THE SEAT.  

           

          I AM ALSO LUCKY THAT NOW I AM ABLE TO WALK AROUND THE HOUSE WITH NO 
WALKER OR CANE, SO I AM NOW DOING ALL THE COOKING, AND EVEN THE DISHES 
AFTERWARD.  BILL STILL STARTS THE LAUNDRY, AND I CAN STEP IN AND FINISH AND DO 
ALL THE FOLDING.  I AM NOT ABLE TO DO MUCH IN THE WAY OF CLEANING SO HE DOES 
THAT TOO.

         

        I ALWAYS THOUGHT I WOULD BE THE ONE TO TAKE CARE OF HIM, BUT THE LORD 
WORKS IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS.  AFTER BEING MARRIED SO LONG, OUR RELATIONSHIP HASN’T 
CHANGED.  I KNOW HE IS THERE FOR ME AND I AM THERE FOR HIM, SO WE ARE TWO VERY 
LUCKY PEOPLE.  MY HEART GOES OUT TO ALL WHOSE RELATIONSHIP HAS CHANGED AND NOT 
FOR THE BETTER.

         

        PATTTI – WISCONSIN      ----- TIAD

        From: Todd Tarno [mailto:toddtm2...@sbcglobal.net] 
        Sent: Friday, June 12, 2009 3:01 PM
        To: transverse myelitis; Janice
        Subject: Re: [TMIC] Relationships

         

              TM has made Billy & mines relationship stronger.

               

              I did ask him when TM hit ( when we knew it was going to be a 
long road to recovery ) and we had only been together for 5 years & he hadn't 
signed up for this, " Do you want to stay together or not ? "  He was so bad at 
me for even asking the question in the first place, but I knew then that he was 
in for the long road to recovery too.

              I had started a cross stitch of our anniversary date, it was half 
done when TM hit, but that was the first thing I finished in between naps.  lol

              Now it's been 7 years with TM & we will have been together these 
Nov. will be 12 years.

               

              May all of our relationships are stronger today,

              Todd in CC, TX



              --- On Thu, 6/11/09, Janice <jan...@centurytel.net> wrote:


                From: Janice <jan...@centurytel.net>
                Subject: [TMIC]
                To: "transverse myelitis" <tmic-list@eskimo.com>
                Date: Thursday, June 11, 2009, 10:38 PM

              It's Janice again.     I have something else that I have wondered 
about and have decided to just ask and see what is out there.

               

              Do you feel that having TM has improved or destroyed the 
love/happiness in your marriage/relationship with your partner?

               

                 
             

         
       

   

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