Talking about this. I like to gift my wife but she doesnt really care. Not 
because she doesnt love me, but thats the kind of person she is. This holds 
true not only for valentine's day but for all occassions. I personally dont 
like it because I believe that love should be expressed. Therefore we have 
decided that when we feel like gifting ya phir jyada pyaar aa raha hoga (it 
hardly happens these days given kids and busy lifestyle) we will talk about 
gifting and if she wants anything at that time she will tell me. 

 

No one gifted me anything for my birthday because I could never celebrate it. 
Its in may and in may there is school vacation. So no one sang for me. Hence I 
dont remember other people's b'days bar a few. 

When we were newly married, i was filling some form and I typed wrong date for 
my wife's b'day. She was there and she just corrected me and didnt mind at all. 
We both laughed.


When we all met last time, we were talking about life mei kya reh gaya etc, I 
said I should have lived single for 1 more year in Australia and then just the 
two of us before having the first kid for another 2 more years. Someone said he 
didnt get to live even for a year by himself and got married at 23? So I 
thought I got a bit more time than this person. I know a few of us got married 
when I was still studying engineering.

Like Subu said, we haev to live with it really. and its not bad. There are 
different ways we can enjoy.

 

Sameer


Date: Fri, 19 Feb 2010 07:47:57 +0000
Subject: Re: Views on marriage
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]

I must be indeed sounding trivial to you guys. I even told his mom that I was 
angry he didn't remember. She didn't guarantee he would remember every 
time..."he is like that...if he remembers he will, if he won't, he won't. You 
should not mind it." how helpful is that -- he will remember and may not 
remember....well there are only two such possibilities anyway.


But i find it very silly to discuss with my mom-in-law. Oh Nooooooooooooo!
Sushma, I do hope a lot though...and guess what it turns into demands.


:-)


On Thu, Feb 18, 2010 at 11:30 PM, Sushma Salian <[email protected]> wrote:




after years of marriage, gifting, forgetting to gift & getting sad about it 
seems to be trivial & no gifting seems to be the better option to keep the 
peace of the house & mind maintained. where there's hope there is despair, 
(asha karoge to nirasha hogi)- very pessimistic- or realistic? any comments on 
this, anybody...





From: subramaniam sreenivasan <[email protected]>

To: [email protected]
Sent: Thu, February 18, 2010 5:26:45 PM

Subject: RE: Views on marriage




It started on 14th Feb 2010 for me and by me... when there were no gifts .. 
till then, there was, always. Now, if you look at it positively, gifts become 
lower priority because with time people find so many other ways to express 
their love.

But dont you worry, it will not happen to you. Given how thoughtful Vaskar has 
been, inspite of being far away, tells me that you will be receiving gifts 
until you are 80.
 
 


Date: Wed, 17 Feb 2010 23:01:39 +0000
Subject: Re: Views on marriage
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]

Subu, i would really like to know how it started...in terms of V-day, birthday, 
anniversary...and when giving gifts started dropping from the priorities. This 
will be hugely beneficial to me. 


I was actually angry with Vaskar, thinking he is never going to remember. He is 
not with me, he is in Delhi...to join me here in April. I sent him two 
personalised cards but no flowers or anything. as i was angry even before the 
day had arrived assuming he won't care or remember...and then on Saturday...i 
was completely surprised to get the goodies.


Left me feeling miserable anyway, for having such negative thoughts about him. 
Ours is almost an arranged marriage...we are still knowing each other i guess. 
I would think that matters. No?
arch




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