Aubrey, you like going for the short ribs with your punches, don't you? Every
SB hit scored points with the judges. And how could I have forgotten Bloodrayne?
And which Gargoyles movie are you referring to? The one with Joe "Jake and the
Fat Man" Penny or the one with Michael "proof that even California redwoods can
find gainful employment in H'Wood" Pare?
---------[ Received Mail Content ]----------
Subject : RE: [scifinoir2] Stephen Baldwin (was Dragon Wars)
Date : Mon, 26 Jan 2009 14:10:56 -0500
From : Aubrey Leatherwood <aubrey.leatherw...@hotmail.com>
To : <scifinoir2@yahoogroups.com>
These are lovely. My list is short because the brain has been damaged from
weekend viewing.
Mistie
Epoch (I enjoyed that one, too)
Dungeons and Dragons the first one... haven't seen that second one yet
Dragon Storm (Who thought Maxwell Caulfield could find a more demeaning role
than the nerd turned secret-indentity-wielding hot biker? Still, I didn't mind
it)
Even if you're on a plane, walk out:
BloodRayne
BloodRayne 2
Any future BloodRaynes
(Careful folks Stephen King's about to take a beating!) The Langoliers
Earthstorm (That Damn Stephen Baldwin)
Darkstorm (That Damn Stephen Baldwin)Gargoyles
Aubrey Leatherwoodwww.aubreyleatherwood.comFaceBook * MySpaceThe People You
Know, The Sex They HaveROMANTIC TIMES NOMINEE FOR BEST CONTEMPORARY EROTICA
2008ISBN: 978-0-9818905-0-0Lyrical Press. Inc
To: scifino...@yahoogroups.comfrom: truthseeker...@lycos.comdate: Mon, 26 Jan
2009 12:28:37 -0500Subject: Re: [scifinoir2] Stephen Baldwin (was Dragon Wars)
Alright, I'm chiming in.Worth a Mistie WatchDead and DeaderBasilisk: The
Serpent KingDragon SwordDungeons & Dragons: Wrath of the Dragon GodLake
Placid (on loop!)10.5 Apocalypse (Dean's magic makes it all better)"Even if
you're on a plane, walk out" (LMNAO, BTB!)Kaw ("Never more", to quote
Poe)Dragon Wars (sooner have my eyes burnt from their sockets with white-hot
needles)ANYTHING with the name Uwe Boll attachedWraiths of Roanoke (even the
dead folks in the movie asked to have their names removed from the credits)A
Sound of Thunder (always thought that it was more boomy and less sucky)100
Million B.C. (all that time... one would think they would've gotten it right at
some point...)Rise: Blood Hunter (vampyr everywhe! re protested the making of
this, regardless of the potential risks)Rock Monster (shuddering)Pterodactyl
(any movie in which Coolio is the best actor in the cast?)Abominable (aka The
Movie Which Lives Up To Its Name)(LNAO, more to come)
---------[ Received Mail Content ]----------Subject : Re: [scifinoir2] Stephen
Baldwin (was Dragon Wars)Date : Mon, 26 Jan 2009 16:09:33 +0000From :
keithbjohn...@comcast.netto : scifino...@yahoogroups.comhey, that's cool. the
real trick is knowing which B- movies are really fun camp for the ages, and
which are just crappy schlock. What we need to do, gang, is start rating these
movies for each other on that level. See, as Martin just did, showing me that
at least this Dean Cain flick is a good time-waster. I've seen others of his
that are just plain bad. There was one where he was a security chief in an
underground facility creating dinosaurs from old DNA. (And isn't Cain always
playing a security chief or soldier in a top-secret facility?) One of the
baddies got loose and started having human snacks. It was so bad because the
CGI was horrible, and the used the *exact same* scene for every appearance of
the creature! It was running down this curving hallway, and every singl!
e time the monster was shown, it was the exact same loop of film. So bad it
wasn't even good camp. So we'll do that. Whoever has sat (suffered) through a
SciFi flick can rate it on "camp" or MST3K factor, so the others can know if
it'd be a great laugh riot on a cold winter's day, or just a woefully bad piece
of CGI-filled dreck that's not even worth watching for derision. And on that
scale, I can drop a couple of films like that: Worth a Mistie watch: Rock
Monster (though I don't know why, it makes me life) The Beast of Bray Road
(that urban werewolf legend in film) Leprechaun - yes I said it. Horrible,
horrible film, but Warwick Dunn (?) makes me laugh as the creepy killer sprite.
This ain't your daddy's Lucky Charms! Dragon Sword (I think) - it's the one
with Patric Swayze. Again, a bad movie, but acting is just good enough (it has
many established actors) to make it dumb fun Epoch - The first couple of these
movies about some alien rock thingie activating on Earth may b!
e a bit befuddling, but star David Keith helps make 'em watchable Alie
n Lockdown (think that's it) - there's one or two of these flicks about a
monster loose on an orbiting prison. I think one stars Christopher Lambert.
Dumb fun. Frankenfish - not sure why I laughed at this one, it's one of the
worst ever. But watching these idiot young people run from a stupid killer fish
in the Louisiana Bayou had me rolling And from the "Even if you're on a plane,
walk out" category: Dragon Storm - I just wailed on it. American 90210 clones
as reincarnation of Asian warriors and royals? 'Nuff said. Gargoyles -- not the
Cornel West camp classic--that one had great makeup and high fun, camp factor.
The recent remake overflowing with cheap CGI Harpies - Bad acting, lackluster
action, bad CGI Gryphon - Bad acting (though it has established actors like
Larry Drake and Anthony LePalia's younger brother), lackluster action, bad CGI
That Francis Drake movie --came out last week starring Adrian "Highlander"
Paul. It was awful! The CGI ships and ocean sucked, the cha!
racters were pitiful. There are many, many more. Basically almost every SciFi
Original that's loaded with cheap CGI instead of good scale models or live
action shots, just sucks -------------- Original message ----------------------
From: "Martin Baxter" > Keith, you may look askance at this, but I'm *good*
with Dean Cain in such > movies. I think that, instinctively, he knows that
these are B-moives, and gives > them the full camp effect. One of those movies
aired last weekend on Skiffy. > Can't remember the title, but he played an Army
officer leading a Delta team > into a Central American country to find the
members of a research team that > hadn't answered calls. They were working on
an experimental medicine that > created zombies. I was foing to pass on t until
I heard that Dean was starring. > I admit to two hours of brain-off-the-hook
fun. Didn't have to Mistie it. Dean > did that himself. > > Ah! "Dead and
Deader" was the flick. > > > > > > ---------[ Received Mail !
Content ]---------- > > Subject : Re: [scifinoir2] Stephen Baldwin (wa
s Dragon Wars) > > Date : Mon, 26 Jan 2009 03:58:20 +0000 > > From :
keithbjohn...@comcast.net > > To : scifinoir2@yahoogroups.com > > > I'll see
your Stephen Baldwin, and raise you Lorenzo Lamas ("Raptor Island") and > Dean
Cain (a whole bunch of cheesy dino flicks). Those guys are in a bunch of >
really bad flicks. And while we're at it, today I was myself (as always) >
lamenting the crappy movies that SciFi serves up. One thing you note pretty >
quickly is that they seem to be going through the cryptid and mythology books >
for inspiration. I mean, look at all the films they've done in the last couple
> of years: Gargoyles, Harpies, Gryphon, Wyvern, Basilisk, Minotaur, Baal: The
> Storm God, Chupacabra, Rock Monster--the whole encyclopedia of myth and
legend. > And then add in Kaw (killer crows), Frankenfish, Boa vs. Python--you
get the > idea. > > Baldwin, Lamas, and myths aside, the biggest problem is
that all these movies > suck! Bad acting, bad writing, and really, re!
ally bad CGI. Every monster they > craft is worse than a the CGI in a five
year old video game. Horrible! > > > > > > > > -------------- Original message
---------------------- > From: Aubrey Leatherwood > > > > Friday night into
yesterday was one of those sweat shop writing sessions for > me. > > Couch,
laptop, grilled meat, strong iced beverage, and remote control. Ahh the > >
remote control... Useful when something is on... Not so useful yesterday. > >
Harpies! Yep, Harpies on Sci Fi. Now > > > > Much of the folklore, mythology,
even urban legend I've loved to read about > > since I was tiny, get made into
SciFi Channel movies or movies that *make it* > to > > SciFi. Harpies,
gargoyles, dragons, Merlin (god I hate sam neill but i love > > miranda
richardson), etc... I'm excited by the prospect of them all, which is > >
why--as if I have the memory span of a fruitfly--I watch (or try to watch) >
these > > programs. I desperately want to suspend my disbelief for an hour or!
two, get > > lost in a story, then come back from my odyssey refreshe
d and entertained. I > am, > > yes people, a damn idiot! > > > > In comes
Stephen Baldwin. > > > > I've been trying to figure out how to phrase it for
some minutes now, and > can't > > seem to do so. I feel like an atrocity has
been visited on me. How does this > guy > > continue to get work, and why does
a ton of it end up on Sci Fi? Why? This guy > > has made two hundred and
seventy million movies. What deal has he made or > > perhaps one of his more
talented brothers (take your pick from the pill > poppin, > > punch throwin,
drunk dialin baldwin grab bag) with the devil to persist in > this > >
nonsense. > > > > In Harpies he was an NYPD cop that went back in time after
accidentally get > some > > amulets and inserting them into a glowing egg of
some sort. Back in time he > > demands entry into the Lord's castle by
demanding that he let Nicky from the > > NYPD in. It gets worse, but I won't
describe anymore to you. I don't have to, > > even if you haven't seen it, you
kno!
w how bad it is. > > > > This pointless, directionless rant brought to you by
the letter C for > > craptastic.Aubrey
Leatherwoodwww.aubreyleatherwood.comFaceBook * MySpaceThe > > People You Know,
The Sex They HaveROMANTIC TIMES NOMINEE FOR BEST CONTEMPORARY > > EROTICA
2008ISBN: 978-0-9818905-0-0Lyrical Press. Inc > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
_________________________________________________________________ > > Windows
Live�: E-mail. Chat. Share. Get more ways to connect. > >
http://windowslive.com/explore?ocid=TXT_TAGLM_WL_t2_allup_explore_012009 > > >
> > http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQdwk8Yntds
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQdwk8Yntds
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