'Dead and Deader" is the Dean Cain flick I told you about, in which he's an
Army officer who leads a team in search of a Central American research team,
and comes back zombiefied. "Basilisk" is good, provided that you're willing to
treat it as camp from the gate. *Never* let it become serious fare, or you're
doomed. It stars Jeremy London, who plays an archaeologist discovering a
previously unknown site in the Middle East with what appears to be remarkably
life-like stone statues, including the basilisk. He take the finds back to his
university for a big premiere, sponsored by Yancey Butler (of "Witchblade"
fame). London's boss is Stephen Furst (Vir Cotto from Bab5). The premiere is
staged to culminate with the unveiling during a solar eclipse, which awakens
the beast. Fun ensues. And Cleavant Derricks (Rembrandt from "Sliders") is
there as an Army National Guard colonel, too.
FUN. NO BRAIN USE ALLOWED.
---------[ Received Mail Content ]----------
Subject : Re: [scifinoir2] Stephen Baldwin (was Dragon Wars)
Date : Tue, 27 Jan 2009 00:35:45 +0000
From : keithbjohn...@comcast.net
To : scifinoir2@yahoogroups.com
What is "Dead and Deader". And "Basilisk"? Are you serious? It's worth a watch?
I meant "Dragon Wars", not "Dragon Storm", as a "walk out" flick. What is "100
Million B.C."? Is it that God-awful film with Edward Burns about the team that
goes back in time to save a comrade? And "Pterodactyl"! That's the one! The one
with Coolio as a special ops commander! Man, just seeing him in that had me
laughing my arse off!
Now that we're on it, there are a couple of other films SciFi shows that are
pretty good camp fun. One is about a group of nubile young co-eds at a college
campus in the Northeast. The lovely young lasses seem to be too good to be true
to the young men they vamp, until it's revealed they're aliens who are feeding
on the hapless stooges. I seem to remember they chose the location because it's
really cold, and they're from an ice-bound planet. I want to say Nicole
"Charles in Charge" Eggert is one of the stars. It's really silly fun,
especially when the girls start sprout tentacles and their would-be paramours
start bugging out!
Oh--and I wish I could take credit for "Even if you're on a plane, walk out".
But no, it's the movie review given to the worst movies in the Atlanta-based
indie newspaper Creative Loafing.
-------------- Original message ----------------------
From: "Martin Baxter"
> Alright, I'm chiming in.
>
> Worth a Mistie Watch
>
> Dead and Deader
> Basilisk: The Serpent King
> Dragon Sword
> Dungeons & Dragons: Wrath of the Dragon God
> Lake Placid (on loop!)
> 10.5 Apocalypse (Dean's magic makes it all better)
>
>
>
> "Even if you're on a plane, walk out" (LMNAO, BTB!)
> Kaw ("Never more", to quote Poe)
> Dragon Wars (sooner have my eyes burnt from their sockets with white-hot
> needles)
> ANYTHING with the name Uwe Boll attached
> Wraiths of Roanoke (even the dead folks in the movie asked to have their
> names
> removed from the credits)
> A Sound of Thunder (always thought that it was more boomy and less sucky)
> 100 Million B.C. (all that time... one would think they would've gotten it
> right
> at some point...)
> Rise: Blood Hunter (vampyr everywhere protested the making of this,
> regardless
> of the potential risks)
> Rock Monster (shuddering)
> Pterodactyl (any movie in which Coolio is the best actor in the cast?)
> Abominable (aka The Movie Which Lives Up To Its Name)
>
> (LNAO, more to come)
>
>
>
>
>
> ---------[ Received Mail Content ]----------
>
> Subject : Re: [scifinoir2] Stephen Baldwin (was Dragon Wars)
>
> Date : Mon, 26 Jan 2009 16:09:33 +0000
>
> From : keithbjohn...@comcast.net
>
> To : scifinoir2@yahoogroups.com
>
>
> Hey, that's cool. the real trick is knowing which B- movies are really fun
> camp
> for the ages, and which are just crappy schlock.
>
> What we need to do, gang, is start rating these movies for each other on that
> level. See, as Martin just did, showing me that at least this Dean Cain flick
> is
> a good time-waster. I've seen others of his that are just plain bad. There
> was
> one where he was a security chief in an underground facility creating
> dinosaurs
> from old DNA. (And isn't Cain always playing a security chief or soldier in a
> top-secret facility?) One of the baddies got loose and started having human
> snacks. It was so bad because the CGI was horrible, and the used the *exact
> same* scene for every appearance of the creature! It was running down this
> curving hallway, and every single time the monster was shown, it was the
> exact
> same loop of film. So bad it wasn't even good camp.
>
> So we'll do that. Whoever has sat (suffered) through a SciFi flick can rate
> it
> on "camp" or MST3K factor, so the others can know if it'd be a great laugh
> riot
> on a cold winter's day, or just a woefully bad piece of CGI-filled dreck
> that's
> not even worth watching for derision.
>
> And on that scale, I can drop a couple of films like that:
>
> Worth a Mistie watch:
>
> Rock Monster (though I don't know why, it makes me life)
> The Beast of Bray Road (that urban werewolf legend in film)
> Leprechaun - yes I said it. Horrible, horrible film, but Warwick Dunn (?)
> makes
> me laugh as the creepy killer sprite. This ain't your daddy's Lucky Charms!
> Dragon Sword (I think) - it's the one with Patric Swayze. Again, a bad movie,
> but acting is just good enough (it has many established actors) to make it
> dumb
> fun
> Epoch - The first couple of these movies about some alien rock thingie
> activating on Earth may be a bit befuddling, but star David Keith helps make
> 'em
> watchable
> Alien Lockdown (think that's it) - there's one or two of these flicks about a
> monster loose on an orbiting prison. I think one stars Christopher Lambert.
> Dumb
> fun.
> Frankenfish - not sure why I laughed at this one, it's one of the worst ever.
> But watching these idiot young people run from a stupid killer fish in the
> Louisiana Bayou had me rolling
>
>
>
> And from the "Even if you're on a plane, walk out" category:
>
> Dragon Storm - I just wailed on it. American 90210 clones as reincarnation of
> Asian warriors and royals? 'Nuff said.
> Gargoyles -- not the Cornel West camp classic--that one had great makeup and
> high fun, camp factor. The recent remake overflowing with cheap CGI
> Harpies - Bad acting, lackluster action, bad CGI
> Gryphon - Bad acting (though it has established actors like Larry Drake and
> Anthony LePalia's younger brother), lackluster action, bad CGI
> That Francis Drake movie --came out last week starring Adrian "Highlander"
> Paul.
> It was awful! The CGI ships and ocean sucked, the characters were pitiful.
>
> There are many, many more. Basically almost every SciFi Original that's
> loaded
> with cheap CGI instead of good scale models or live action shots, just sucks
>
>
>
>
>
>
> -------------- Original message ----------------------
> From: "Martin Baxter"
> > Keith, you may look askance at this, but I'm *good* with Dean Cain in such
> > movies. I think that, instinctively, he knows that these are B-moives, and
> gives
> > them the full camp effect. One of those movies aired last weekend on
> > Skiffy.
> > Can't remember the title, but he played an Army officer leading a Delta
> > team
> > into a Central American country to find the members of a research team that
> > hadn't answered calls. They were working on an experimental medicine that
> > created zombies. I was foing to pass on t until I heard that Dean was
> starring.
> > I admit to two hours of brain-off-the-hook fun. Didn't have to Mistie it.
> > Dean
> > did that himself.
> >
> > Ah! "Dead and Deader" was the flick.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > ---------[ Received Mail Content ]----------
> >
> > Subject : Re: [scifinoir2] Stephen Baldwin (was Dragon Wars)
> >
> > Date : Mon, 26 Jan 2009 03:58:20 +0000
> >
> > From : keithbjohn...@comcast.net
> >
> > To : scifinoir2@yahoogroups.com
> >
> >
> > I'll see your Stephen Baldwin, and raise you Lorenzo Lamas ("Raptor
> > Island")
> and
> > Dean Cain (a whole bunch of cheesy dino flicks). Those guys are in a bunch
> > of
> > really bad flicks. And while we're at it, today I was myself (as always)
> > lamenting the crappy movies that SciFi serves up. One thing you note pretty
> > quickly is that they seem to be going through the cryptid and mythology
> > books
> > for inspiration. I mean, look at all the films they've done in the last
> > couple
> > of years: Gargoyles, Harpies, Gryphon, Wyvern, Basilisk, Minotaur, Baal:
> > The
> > Storm God, Chupacabra, Rock Monster--the whole encyclopedia of myth and
> legend.
> > And then add in Kaw (killer crows), Frankenfish, Boa vs. Python--you get
> > the
> > idea.
> >
> > Baldwin, Lamas, and myths aside, the biggest problem is that all these
> > movies
> > suck! Bad acting, bad writing, and really, really bad CGI. Every monster
> > they
> > craft is worse than a the CGI in a five year old video game. Horrible!
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > -------------- Original message ----------------------
> > From: Aubrey Leatherwood
> > >
> > > Friday night into yesterday was one of those sweat shop writing sessions
> > > for
> > me.
> > > Couch, laptop, grilled meat, strong iced beverage, and remote control.
> > > Ahh
> the
> > > remote control... Useful when something is on... Not so useful yesterday.
> > > Harpies! Yep, Harpies on Sci Fi. Now
> > >
> > > Much of the folklore, mythology, even urban legend I've loved to read
> > > about
> > > since I was tiny, get made into SciFi Channel movies or movies that *make
> it*
> > to
> > > SciFi. Harpies, gargoyles, dragons, Merlin (god I hate sam neill but i
> > > love
> > > miranda richardson), etc... I'm excited by the prospect of them all,
> > > which
> is
> > > why--as if I have the memory span of a fruitfly--I watch (or try to
> > > watch)
> > these
> > > programs. I desperately want to suspend my disbelief for an hour or two,
> > > get
> > > lost in a story, then come back from my odyssey refreshed and
> > > entertained. I
> > am,
> > > yes people, a damn idiot!
> > >
> > > In comes Stephen Baldwin.
> > >
> > > I've been trying to figure out how to phrase it for some minutes now, and
> > can't
> > > seem to do so. I feel like an atrocity has been visited on me. How does
> > > this
> > guy
> > > continue to get work, and why does a ton of it end up on Sci Fi? Why?
> > > This
> guy
> > > has made two hundred and seventy million movies. What deal has he made or
> > > perhaps one of his more talented brothers (take your pick from the pill
> > poppin,
> > > punch throwin, drunk dialin baldwin grab bag) with the devil to persist
> > > in
> > this
> > > nonsense.
> > >
> > > In Harpies he was an NYPD cop that went back in time after accidentally
> > > get
> > some
> > > amulets and inserting them into a glowing egg of some sort. Back in time
> > > he
> > > demands entry into the Lord's castle by demanding that he let Nicky from
> > > the
> > > NYPD in. It gets worse, but I won't describe anymore to you. I don't have
> to,
> > > even if you haven't seen it, you know how bad it is.
> > >
> > > This pointless, directionless rant brought to you by the letter C for
> > > craptastic.Aubrey Leatherwoodwww.aubreyleatherwood.comFaceBook *
> > > MySpaceThe
> > > People You Know, The Sex They HaveROMANTIC TIMES NOMINEE FOR BEST
> CONTEMPORARY
> > > EROTICA 2008ISBN: 978-0-9818905-0-0Lyrical Press. Inc
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > _________________________________________________________________
> > > Windows Live�: E-mail. Chat. Share. Get more ways to connect.
> > > http://windowslive.com/explore?ocid=TXT_TAGLM_WL_t2_allup_explore_012009
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQdwk8Yntds
>
>
>
>
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQdwk8Yntds
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQdwk8Yntds
