Interestingly, it was Disney movies that helped our son grasp the concept of reality vs. pretend. We pointed out to him that there was a real boy named Tommy Kirk who pretended to be other children in a number of movies.
And ya HAD to mention candy bars I STILL have "low impulse control" in some areas <sigh> > -----Original Message----- > From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]] > Sent: Monday, February 25, 2002 8:40 AM > To: CF-Community > Subject: RE: Come see the violence inherent in the system! > > > True. :) > While I am a proud papa and love my kids, I'm not sure that > their taking responsibility for their actions and knowing the > difference between real and pretend is all nurture (or > genetics for that matter). Moshe will come home with a story > and will tell it to us and then say that its all pretend and > didn't happen. He knows the difference. Hinda will sometimes > get upset with herself when she doesn't act right. She knows > that she's not doing the right thing but at the time her > impulses are more powerful than her common sense (like when > she's overtired). That may be the issue here. Rather than the > child not knowing the difference between real and pretend, he > may have low impulse control. This is the 'voice in our head' > that stops us from just grabbing a candy bar when we want it > or beating on > someone when they upset us. Super ego, if you want. > > At 11:26 AM 2/25/02, you wrote: > >But then again, Michael, that's YOUR 4-year-old > >;-) > > > >> -----Original Message----- > >> From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] > [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]] > >> Sent: Monday, February 25, 2002 8:27 AM > >> To: CF-Community > >> Subject: RE: Come see the violence inherent in the system! > >> > >> > >> I haven't taken a child psych course in 10 years, but I > >> believe that you may be correct, but at a much earlier age. I > >> know my 4 year old is quite aware of what pretend is and what > >> is not. On the other hand, my 1 year old just hasn't told > me yet. :) > >> Real and pretend are concepts that probably come into a > >> child's thinking around 2 or 3. But again, it's been years > >> and I can be wrong on this. > >> > >> At 11:14 AM 2/25/02, you wrote: > >> >One of the psych-trained folks on the list please correct me > >> if I'm wrong, > >> >but aren't children younger than about 6 years of age unable > >> to tell the > >> >difference between real and pretend? and therefore not > understand the > >> >concept of their actions? > >> > > >> >-Ben > >> > > >> > > >> >> -----Original Message----- > >> >> From: Mark Smyth [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]] > >> >> Sent: Monday, February 25, 2002 8:08 AM > >> >> To: CF-Community > >> >> Subject: RE: Come see the violence inherent in the system! > >> >> > >> >> > >> >> where did I say that? > >> >> > >> >> Everyone has the right to defend themselves, 3 year olds can > >> >> be restrained, > >> >> by virtually anybody... > >> >> > >> >> I'm taking exception to the swift right hand remarks and > >> the general > >> >> consenus taken by you also that violence is acceptable > >> against young > >> >> children. > >> >> > >> >> The comparison between being attacked by a 3 year old child > >> >> and a 30 year > >> >> old adult is ridiculos, they are absolutely different > >> >> situations. One is an > >> >> adult totally responsable for his actions, the other is > >> >> little more than a > >> >> baby. > >> >> > >> >> If you thnk you can justify violence against young children, > >> >> you'll have to > >> >> try harder than that..... > >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > >> >> -----Original Message----- > >> >> From: William Wheatley [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]] > >> >> Sent: 25 February 2002 16:01 > >> >> To: CF-Community > >> >> Subject: Re: Come see the violence inherent in the system! > >> >> > >> >> > >> >> AHHh so if a 30 year old fractures your skull you fight back > >> >> but if its a 3 > >> >> year old you just smile and let him keep fracturing until > >> you're dead > >> >> > >> >> Sounds like a good idea to me > >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > >> >> Bill Wheatley > >> >> Director of Development > >> >> AEPS INC > >> >> www.aeps.com > >> >> Macromedia ColdFusion Alliance Consulting Partner > >> >> Macromedia ColdFusion 5.0 Certified Developer > >> >> 954-472-6684 X303 > >> >> ICQ: 417645 > >> >> ----- Original Message ----- > >> >> From: "Mark Smyth" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > >> >> To: "CF-Community" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > >> >> Sent: Monday, February 25, 2002 10:26 AM > >> >> Subject: RE: Come see the violence inherent in the system! > >> >> > >> >> > >> >> > Don't you guys think that slapping around an already > >> >> (obviously) disturbed > >> >> 3 > >> >> > year is > >> >> > a) immoral - hes just a baby really regardless of his > behaviour > >> >> > b) impractical - it'll probably turn him into a psycho > >> >> > > >> >> > >>>One swift right hand and all fracturing stop. > >> >> > Not true, it will just reinforce his believe that violence > >> >> is acceptable > >> >> and > >> >> > an effective way of resolving conflict > >> >> > > >> >> > This kind've behaviour does happen all over the world, and > >> >> its normally > >> >> down > >> >> > to bad parenting, or a traumatised childhood. > >> >> > > >> >> > I'm not saying his behaviour is acceptable, if any of you > >> >> think imposing > >> >> > violence of a 3 year old child is acceptable, take a good > >> >> look in the > >> >> mirror > >> >> > > >> >> > M > >> >> > > >> >> > > >> >> > > >> >> > -----Original Message----- > >> >> > From: Ledwith, Brian [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]] > >> >> > Sent: 25 February 2002 15:20 > >> >> > To: CF-Community > >> >> > Subject: RE: Come see the violence inherent in the system! > >> >> > > >> >> > > >> >> > As tempting as it is, with so many Americans being so > >> >> lawsuit-happy, we > >> >> have > >> >> > to think twice (or 3 or 4 times) before we do that. > >> >> Although, if that kid > >> >> > started assaulting me...... > >> >> > > >> >> > > >> >> > > >> >> > -----Original Message----- > >> >> > From: Angel Stewart [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]] > >> >> > Sent: Sunday, February 24, 2002 2:24 AM > >> >> > To: CF-Community > >> >> > Subject: RE: Come see the violence inherent in the system! > >> >> > > >> >> > > >> >> > One swift right hand and all fracturing stop. > >> >> > > >> >> > I cannot believe an adult would allow themselves to be > >> attacked by a > >> >> > damned three year old in the first place. Utterly > >> rediculous, and I > >> >> > think only in America. In Trinidad the child would have > >> been soundly > >> >> > smacked.All tantrums stop Fas Fas. > >> >> > > >> >> > -Gel > >> >> > > >> >> > > >> >> > -----Original Message----- > >> >> > From: Beth Fleischer [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]] > >> >> > > >> >> > <sigh> I used to judge kids throwing violent tantrums in > >> >> the supermarket > >> >> > - but then I saw this show on HBO about some poor family > >> >> who adopted a > >> >> > FAS kid. The kids is incredibly volatile and can attack > >> >> with incredible > >> >> > force, biting, kicking - his mom has to sit on him and > >> hold his arms > >> >> > down, away from his face to stop his tantrums. He is only > >> >> 7. When he is > >> >> > not tantruming, he tells the camera he hates himself for > >> >> how he acts but > >> >> > he cant' stop it. > >> >> > > >> >> > I expect there is something really wrong with a three > >> year old who > >> >> > fractures an adult skull with a toy truck. > >> >> > > >> >> > > >> >> > > >> >> > >> >> > >> > > >> > > > ______________________________________________________________________ Structure your ColdFusion code with Fusebox. Get the official book at http://www.fusionauthority.com/bkinfo.cfm Archives: http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/index.cfm?sidebar=lists
