[lace] Commemoratives for Australia

2005-04-05 Thread Noelene Lafferty
I've just received my pair of commem bobbins direct from Roseground
in the UK, and am very happy with them.

For any Australians wishing to order through me, I'll set a closing date
of 30th April for orders, although I will of course send any orders 
made through me on to Jo-Anne or to Roseground direct immediately
I receive them.  I just think there should be a order by date stated.

If anyone's mislaid their email containing what's on offer, there's a copy
of it with Australian prices on my website, address below

Noelene in Cooma
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
http://members.ozemail.com.au/~nlafferty/

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Re: [lace] I was stuck, but now it's done

2005-04-05 Thread robinlace
Wow!  That's certainly an invention and a half!  Congratulations on getting it 
done.  It's lovely.

Robin P.
Los Angeles, California, USA
(formerly  Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania)
[EMAIL PROTECTED]

- Original Message -
From: Patty Dowden [EMAIL PROTECTED]
 I was working on a wire interpretation of one of Tamara's 2 Pair 
 Inventions, but I got stuck for a while.  Well, now it's done, it 
 has a name (Purple People Eater)

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[lace] Demoing

2005-04-05 Thread Jean Nathan
Tamara wrote:

Jean Nathan has already told us that demoing does
*not* count towards improving the tax status of a group in UK, so we
know that UK members wouldn't be double dipping. 

No I didn't. Don't know anything about it.

Over on chat I said that for individuals donations of items to charities
doesn't count as a donation for tax purposes, only cash does, and that the
charity can claim back the tax paid, not the person making the donation.

Jean in Poole.

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Re: [lace] demonstrating, it's tatting! and bobbins

2005-04-05 Thread Laceandbits
In a message dated 04/04/2005 23:41:55 GMT Standard Time, 
[EMAIL PROTECTED] writes:

 One woman came up and said that she used to make lace, but couldn't now as 
 her grip has gone and the bobbins slide through her fingers. Off the top of 
 my head I passed on the thought that if something like the adhesive foam used 
 for window insulation (and the grip bits in bobbin winders!) was stuck onto 
 the body of the bobbins, making them easier to pick up, that might help? She 
 thought it was a good idea, and I think she might try, but has anyone else 
 any 
 thoughts on this?

There is a type of bandage (described as cohesive) which is used for horses 
legs and other veterinary purposes.  It sticks to itself but is not sticky to 
the touch (if that makes sense) and is stretchy enough to be able to make it 
wrap tightly around a thin, not straight object (ie a lace bobbin, or the inner 
ring of an embroidery hoop).  It is similar to the stuff you put under things 
to stop them slipping, but is thinner and more flexible.

You should be able to buy it fairly easily at a tack shop or feed merchants.

Jacquie

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[lace] spring has sprung

2005-04-05 Thread Jenny Barron
it's official Spring is here, got my IOLI bulletin this morning - lovely lovely 
lace
jenny barron
Scotland

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Re: [lace] spring has sprung

2005-04-05 Thread Diane Williams
Wow, Jenny got hers in Scotland on the same day I got
mine in Illinois!  The cover is absolutely beautiful. 
I haven't had a chance to read it yet, but there are
articles about Polychrome.  That was my first choice
class for the IOLI Convention (fingers crossed)!

Diane Williams
Galena, Illinois
[EMAIL PROTECTED]


--- Jenny Barron [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
 it's official Spring is here, got my IOLI bulletin
 this morning - lovely lovely lace
 jenny barron
 Scotland
 
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Diane Williams
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
Galena Illinois USA

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[lace] RE:hitches and dig in

2005-04-05 Thread Mary Robi
Greetings,
Still being fairly new to lace making (mostly because I don't have lots of 
time,) I've done lots of experimenting since my post about hitches.

I began winding my bobbins with the return row wound at an angle. Tamara and 
Alice hit it right on, anyway that worked for me. I stopped the unwinding by 
hitching on the thread, but it wasn't until I wound the bobbins neatly going 
from the head to the end, then angling back that the dig in stopped. 
However, when the bobbin was running low on thread, that angle caused 
unwinding, so winding neatly for the first several rows will help that as 
Tamara (I think) mentioned.

I haven't tried the double hitch yet, that's for the next time I wind 
bobbins. I did try the put my finger out thing, and my hitch held much 
better. So, I was doing the hitch backwards for the way the bobbin  was 
wound.

Also, experimentation showed that contrary to what I thought was logical 
thinking, winding small amounts of thread at the end of the bobbin instead 
of at the top, made for lots of untwisting. The bobbin just seemed to be 
totally out of control as well - not balanced at all. It actually wanted to 
sort of spin weirdly in the opposite direction of the twist.

So, nothing really new, just verification by experimentation.
Thanks to everyone who contributed to this discussion. I know I'll be 
enjoying working at my pillows now that I don't have to fight with my poor 
senseless bobbins.

I can't believe how attached I've become to some of my bobbins. When I can't 
find one, it's like losing sight of your child in a crowd! GBG

Many thanks again to you experienced folks who are so generous about helping 
everyone else!

Oh, in keeping with the tradition of passing it on, the international 
squares that Tamara sent me to try are on their way to Ann Arbor, MI. Lots 
of miles on those bobbins!

Mary
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[lace] Hitches and winding bobbins

2005-04-05 Thread Leonard Bazar
When I wind the bobbins for her, they are better
behaved but, as soon as she has done some reverse
lace, and rewound the bobbins, the problem comes back.
  Maybe I ought to let her use the 'class bobbin
winder' and see if it does in fact make a difference. 
I don't think it is the left-handed versus
right-handed scenario - but anything is possible, I
suppose!

she's not - I hope - winding overhand, but rolling
the bobbin as she should and a winder might help her
there

I strongly suspect Tamara has once again put her
finger on the problem here - the lady must be winding
on the thread, not turning the bobbin, putting extra
twists on the thread, making it springier and so
throwing its hitch.  Obviously, she can't use the
winder to shorten a thread lengthened by gniecal, so
she may have to follow your suggestions rather than
know better than teacher!  You did mention she can't
see the point of keeping the threads the same length. 
A tidy desk may be the symptom of an empty mind, but a
neat lace pillow is a pleasure to work on as well as
to see!  Perhaps winding ribbon on a reel and reeling
ribbon may convince?


[EMAIL PROTECTED], who has just completed his 7
with 7 threads for the Lace Guild AGM this weekend.

Send instant messages to your online friends http://uk.messenger.yahoo.com 

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Re: [lace] spring has sprung

2005-04-05 Thread Laceandbits
Post arrives, and Richard wanders in saying Well, I guess you're the *old* 
lacer here.  Yes, my Bulletin arived in Lincolnshire today.

It's never occured to me to ask before, but why is it called International 
*Old* Lacers?

Jacquie

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Re: [lace] Re: Log books, demo time

2005-04-05 Thread mimi23boyz
Tamara wrote, 
  Well... There's the American Frontier Museum (3 different - German, 
English and Irish - homesteads, run as a sort-of living skansen) 
within 35 miles of me and I might be able to persuade them to include 
lacemaking demos - all three countries were making BL at the time they 
relocated here, so it'd be historically correct. But then I think of 
the summer weather (hot and humid or worse), and the population to be 
educated (tourists with kids), and I don't think I want to face all 
that on a daily basis, so I'm not going to make an effort at persuasion 

Actually, this museum has invited members of our guild to demonstrate on an 
annual basis for many years.  They have a particular event once a year in which 
period artisans and craftsmen demonstrate their particular skills/trades.  
Because it's a special event, attendance is higher than on a regular day, and 
lots of people are exposed to what we do.  We have usually been staged on the 
front porch of the American Farmhouse, which protects us and our pillows from 
the glare of the sun, and also gives us a valid story to tell about why we 
are making many different kinds of lace (depends on where we imigrated from, 
bringing our traditions with us...)  For some reason, I think that this event 
conflicts with another demo event we do in Lynchburg, because it has been a few 
years since any of us went to this.  But you should definitely check it out, 
Tamara - you would only be committing yourself for one weekend.

Clay

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[lace] Re: lace-digest V2005 #71

2005-04-05 Thread LACEELAIN
In a message dated 3/6/2005 2:23:49 P.M. Pacific Standard Time,  
[EMAIL PROTECTED] writes:

As a  tatter, I was amused to see the lost art line used on hair work.   I
don't know about professionals, (how many of us make lace as a  profession?)
but there are certainly gobs of amateurs (which I mean in the  root sense of
amateur, lover, one who does it for the love of  it).


I do apologize  for being so far behind in reading the postings.   I am 
trying hard to catch up.   Perhaps others have already mentioned  that the Lace 
Museum has a wonderful piece of hair lace. It's a shapely vest,  made for a 
small 
woman. The threads of hair have been woven along with threads  of gold.  We 
do sell a postcard picture of this vest and it has been  pictured in several of 
the Museum calendars.
 
Elaine  Merritt
The Lace Museum
552 South. Murphy Avenue
Sunnyvale, CA  94086

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[lace] I thank you, the Purple People Eater thanks you

2005-04-05 Thread Patricia Dowden
Thanks Spiders, for your appreciation of my newest work.  I have it here in 
front of me at work.  My mind is cooking with lots of new ideas.  I read on the 
Lace Knitting list of a wonderful term:  SABLE  Stash Adequate Beyond Life 
Expectancy.   My wire stash is huge and growing!

Patty

In Sillycon Valley.  (Does that mean I'm a Valley Girl?)

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Re: [lace] Hitches and winding bobbins

2005-04-05 Thread robinlace
From: Leonard Bazar [EMAIL PROTECTED]
You did mention she can't
 see the point of keeping the threads the same length. 
 A tidy desk may be the symptom of an empty mind, but a
 neat lace pillow is a pleasure to work on as well as
 to see!  

As one who doesn't keep *anything* else tidy, I can suggest another reason for 
keeping the threads the same length.  This makes handling the bobbins a whole 
lot easier, and will probably also help with the renegades.  If one tether is 
longer than the other(s) when manipulating a quartet, it's hard to twist/cross 
them without them tangling--unless you hold the longer one such that its tether 
is flopping loose (so the bobbin is in the same place as the rest of the 
quartet).  This *encourages* the hitch to leap off!  This may be the root of 
her problem.  When the teacher tidies up her pillow, the bobbins behave.  Then 
when she Penelopes and rewinds to odd lengths, she has trouble again.

Robin P.
Los Angeles, California, USA
(formerly  Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania)
[EMAIL PROTECTED]

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[lace] American Frontier Museum - near Tamara

2005-04-05 Thread Jeriames
In a message dated 4/5/05 12:37:45 PM Eastern Daylight Time, 
[EMAIL PROTECTED] writes:

 this museum has invited members of our guild to demonstrate on an annual 
 basis for many years.  They have a particular event once a year in which 
 period 
 artisans and craftsmen demonstrate their particular skills/trades.  Because 
 it's a special event, attendance is higher than on a regular day, and lots 
 of people are exposed to what we do.  We have usually been staged on the 
 front porch of the American Farmhouse, which protects us and our pillows from 
 the glare of the sun, and also gives us a valid story to tell about why we 
 are making many different kinds of lace (depends on where we imigrated from, 
 bringing our traditions with us...)  For some reason, I think that this event 
 conflicts with another demo event we do in Lynchburg, because it has been a 
 few years since any of us went to this.  

Dear Clay and Tamara and those with similar conflicts of demo dates,

Interesting.  Although I moved to Maine eleven years ago, I continue to 
belong to the Lost Art Lacers of North Jersey.  These lace-loving ladies are in 
great demand throughout the region from which they draw members.  They have a 
person designated just to handle demonstration requests, commitments and 
arrangements.  

It is not unusual to have two teams of lacemakers out at the same time.  
Demonstrators tend to go to whichever event is closer to their home or to the 
event with which they have a long connection.  Many of these events call for 
them to stay all day, not an hour (as in the Baltimore museum commitment).  I 
found the all-day experiences fun.  Once you've gone through all the planning 
to demonstrate, the dressing in special attire or even a nice dress, the 
driving, and the setting up - it just makes sense to stay a while.  Many 
times, 
these lacemakers plan a picnic in connection with their day at a special 
location.  They have the organization of the picnics down to a science.

The Lost Art Lacers are extraordinary.  There is a core group of friends who 
always will volunteer and help each other.  There has been wonderful 
continuity - through the years -- in what they do.  The most committed members 
have 
kept this group very special for over 25 years.  Their present leader 
(President) 
is Lee Daly, who is a member of Arachne and Vice President of IOLI.

Perhaps reading about their experience will give other lace groups new ideas 
of how to cover more demonstrating territory.  Perhaps others are doing 
something similar.  It would be nice to hear how others handle requests for 
demonstrators at more than one venue on the same day.

Jeri Ames in Maine USA
Lace  Embroidery Resource Center

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[lace] Demo hours and tax status for IOLI

2005-04-05 Thread Janice Blair
Whilst we are on the subject of reporting hours, does anyone know what the 
deadline is for reporting hours to our IOLI Area Rep?  I belong to two guilds 
and I am not sure that our hours last year were included in the final total.  
If that is the case, can they be reported this year along with the new hours or 
are they lost forever?  If so, I am sure there are other guild members out 
there that might be interested in the answer to make sure this year's demo 
hours are not lost as well.
Janice


Janice Blair
Crystal Lake, 50 miles northwest of Chicago, Illinois, USA

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[lace] Re: I was stuck, but now it's done

2005-04-05 Thread Tamara P Duvall
On Apr 4, 2005, at 6:09, Patty Dowden wrote:
It bears little resemblance to Tamara's carefully invented inventions, 
but my piece definitely sprang from her pricking.  Thanks Tamara
The shoe's on the other foot - thanks for improving it out of sight! 
I'm not even sure which one you used as the basis :) But it's gorgeous 
- very, very rich. I particularly love the 3-D aspect of it; the 
different layers of the petals remind me of Rosalibre. Did you do them 
using the same techniques (ie all in one go without adding or 
removing pairs and being clever instead), or did you introduce (and 
remove) pairs as needed for each layer?

--
Tamara P Duvallhttp://t-n-lace.net/
Lexington, Virginia, USA (Formerly of Warsaw, Poland)
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[lace] Re: spring has sprung

2005-04-05 Thread Tamara P Duvall
On Apr 5, 2005, at 8:59, Diane Williams wrote:
Wow, Jenny got hers in Scotland on the same day I got
mine in Illinois!
And the same day I got mine in Virginia; Debra must have pulled some 
magic there :)

The cover is absolutely beautiful.
Indeed it is. I had a moment of panic when I first saw it because what 
Jesurum lace does is what Rosalibre is also doing - making BL 
*definitely* 3-D, using a thread of only one size per project (unlike 
Lutac). But then I read Jo Ann Eurell's article on coloured lace and, 
when I read that Jesurum could use up to 400 bobbins, I blew a big gust 
of relief :) Rosalibre may not be *quite* as sculpted, but, so far, 
none of its elements use more than 8-9 prs...

I haven't had a chance to read it yet,
The list of contributors reads like an Arachne sub-directory g I 
couldn't resist and read it all at one gulp (and now have nothing left 
for tomorrow morning, boo hoo). I won't give any secrets away about the 
contents, except one: *do* read Devon's snippet on background lace (p 
13) - I don't remember when I last laughed that hard :)

--
Tamara P Duvallhttp://t-n-lace.net/
Lexington, Virginia, USA (Formerly of Warsaw, Poland)
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[lace] Re: spring has sprung - oops

2005-04-05 Thread Tamara P Duvall
I meant to combine the response to both messages in one, but the send 
finger intervened - bad, bad finger. Bad!

On Apr 5, 2005, at 11:15, [EMAIL PROTECTED] (Jacquie) wrote:
[...] why is it called International *Old* Lacers?
Nobody really knows, but when a poll had been run a few years ago 
whether to change the name, the majority's answer - suprisingly - was 
no; it's another illogical tradition that refuses to bite the dust :)

I cope with it by never using the full title, only the initials (IOLI), 
which I then treat as a word, and use the Polish pronounciation of the 
i - as eeolee, it's actually quite pleasant (reminiscent or 
Aeolian), so I can live with it (especially since I have to g)

But deep inside, I've often thought the name must refer to that old 
Polish song about the old woman who sewed a sack... She sewed it on 
Monday and Tuesday, and quicly ripped all Wednesday, because the seam 
was crooked. She was seen sewing again on Thursday but then on Friday 
she was ripping again, because the start was wrong. She began the work 
again on Saturday, but slept all Sunday, because she was so 
overworked...

Given how much retro-lacing/Peneloping I'd done on my lace it seems 
that the song was written for me :) Just today, I was humming szyla 
baba, szyla baba, szyla baba worek because, even though it's not 
Friday, the start was definitely wrong - I'd forgotten to set in the 
Magic Loop... :(
--
Tamara P Duvallhttp://t-n-lace.net/
Lexington, Virginia, USA (Formerly of Warsaw, Poland)

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[lace] Re: Log books, demo time

2005-04-05 Thread Tamara P Duvall
On Apr 5, 2005, at 12:32, [EMAIL PROTECTED] (Clay) wrote:
But you should definitely check it out, Tamara - you would only be 
committing yourself for one weekend.
Me??? Get on the phone to find out info? Then set out, all by my 
lonesome, to demonstrate? Not on your life! g Someone tells me when 
and where to show up, promises there'll be other lace freaks to keep me 
company, and I'll go to swell the numbers. Maybe; where would I get the 
fancy dress stuff?

--
Tamara P Duvallhttp://t-n-lace.net/
Lexington, Virginia, USA (Formerly of Warsaw, Poland)
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[lace] International Old Lacers

2005-04-05 Thread Aurelia Loveman
Dears... it's not the lacers that are old, it's the lace. You know: 
old lace.  --  Aurelia

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[lace] Re: International Old Lacers

2005-04-05 Thread Tamara P Duvall
On Apr 5, 2005, at 20:52, Aurelia Loveman wrote:
Dears... it's not the lacers that are old, it's the lace. You know: 
old lace.
And Jane Viking-Swanson ditto:
Hi Jacquie and All,  It's Old Lace not old lacemakers G.
That might have been the *intention*, but you-know-what is paved with 
good ones... :) If old lace is meant, why not say so? Like Jacquie, I 
too read it as old lacemakers, especially with so many people saying 
lacers (personally, not my favourite term g) instead of 
lacemakers.

Besides, even if one *did* see the name in terms of old *lace* (rather 
than old *lacemakers*), or the name was changed to represent the 
meaning better, it would still be inaccurate. Might have been OK 52 yrs 
ago, when the organisation was started, and when most of the membership 
concentrated on studying, reproducing and collecting old lace. But 
that's not true anymore; a lot of us - Aurelia and Jane included - 
study the old lace techniques in order to push them further, into new 
shapes. So, it's mosly *new* lace that you see in the Bulletin, and 
even in the study box an occasional modern piece makes an appearance.

By labelling ourselves - voluntarily - as old lacers, we're sawing 
the branch we're sitting on, if we want to get young people interested 
in perpetuating the craft/art; the label only adds to their 
preconceived ideas of lacemaking as something that grannies *used* to 
do...

IMO.
--
Tamara P Duvallhttp://t-n-lace.net/
Lexington, Virginia, USA (Formerly of Warsaw, Poland)
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[lace] Old Lacers name

2005-04-05 Thread Dmt11home
In a message dated 4/5/2005 8:15:46 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,  
[EMAIL PROTECTED] writes:

Nobody  really knows, but when a poll had been run a few years ago 
whether to  change the name, the majority's answer - suprisingly - was 
no; it's  another illogical tradition that refuses to bite the dust  :)




The leadership of the IOLI had decided that they did not want to change the  
name frivolously. So, if I recall this correctly, they structured the poll so  
that changing the name would require the positive action of a majority (or 
maybe  even a 2/3 majority?) of the membership to send by mail a vote voting 
for a  name change. With this structure, those who did not send in a vote were  
considered to be supporting the Old Lacers name. So whether the poll 
actually  meant that the majority of the people actually wanted the Old 
Lacers 
name or  the majority of the people had other things on their minds or didn't 
care is  open to question.
 
I often use the name of the group when trying to muscle my way into  museums, 
etc. I find I am making progress in establishing my credibility with my  
spiel about being the Lace Study Editor of the only publication in the US  
dedicated to lace right up until I mention the name of the group. At that 
point  
the administrative assistant or curator begins to grin and sometimes  to giggle 
uncontrollably. 
 
Guess how I voted.
 
Devon

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Re: [lace] Demo hours and tax status for IOLI

2005-04-05 Thread Mary Derrick
Hi Janice,
My name is Mary and I am the Southern Regional Director on the board of IOLI. 
My states include : Florida, Puerto Rico, North Carolina, South Carolina, 
Tennessee, Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi and Louisiana.   It is the 
responsibility
of your Regional Director who is Anne Moore to get in touch with the Chartered 
Chapters in her region It is about time that  the Regional Directors contact 
their Chartered Chapters and ask for the information as to the hours in demo's 
and any thing other that may be outstanding.  That report is then given and 
read as the post-board meeting and is then posted on the board at convention 
and in the next Bulletin , that report is then printed in the Bulletin.The Name 
of all Directors are listed in your IOLI  Membership Handbook 2004-2005. If 
there are any more questions about demo hours pleas feel free to contact your 
Director or any officer you think might be able to answer your questions.  
Mary
 
p.s. If you have designed or published a lace or tatting, workshops,etc .We 
want to here all about what you and your folks are doing
M

Janice Blair [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote: 
Whilst we are on the subject of reporting hours, does anyone know what the 
deadline is for reporting hours to our IOLI Area Rep? I belong to two guilds 
and I am not sure that our hours last year were included in the final total. If 
that is the case, can they be reported this year along with the new hours or 
are they lost forever? If so, I am sure there are other guild members out there 
that might be interested in the answer to make sure this year's demo hours are 
not lost as well.
Janice


Janice Blair
Crystal Lake, 50 miles northwest of Chicago, Illinois, USA

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[lace] American Frontier Museum/demonstrating

2005-04-05 Thread Clive and Betty Ann Rice
Gentle Spiders,

First, let me say how pleased I am to have read about CRLG Lace Day at BMA.  I 
am also pleased that Laura was able to use my registration since a sudden death 
of a friend prevented my going to Baltimore.   

I have to chime in on the discussion re demonstrating lace.  I made a pact with 
my pocketbook many years ago  that when I was asked to demonstrate lacemaking 
at a venue where admission was charged, I requested a stipend to cover my 
travel expenses.  

Case in point - Many years ago the Frontier Museum in Staunton asked me to come 
demonstrate for 2 days over the weekend.  I knew that the Museum had gotten a 
grant to solicit crafters and demonstrators.  However, they refused to give me 
any monetary consideration.  The drive is about 70 miles each way, making the 
total for 2 days almost 300 miles.  The admission to this Museum is not cheap 
either.  I do know that some demonstrators were paid from that grant.  The 
blacksmith and cooper for example.  I was told that they make a living doing 
that so they expect a salary.  What am I, cottage cheese?  No thank you.

However, the Reynolds Homestead (the home of the progentors of Reynolds 
Aluminum and R.J. Reynolds Tobacco) at Critz, Patrick Co. Virginia invites me 
twice a year to demonstrate in the parlor or on the porch - its my choice.  I 
travel 70 miles each way and do this willingly because they do not charge 
admission for their Spring Frolic and Open House.  I've been going there for so 
many years that now I can tell the history of Hardin and Julia Cox Reynolds to 
the visitors.  I and a weaver are invited to meet with the docents who come 
from the tobacco Reynolds estate in Winston-Salem, NC to meet the docents at 
Critz.  We have lunch, tell about what we do, and generally have a grand time.  
I am given a small stipend for this, but would do it willingly without any 
compensation except  enjoying the country beauty, quiet, and peace of this farm.

I also demonstrate at the Historic Fincastle Festival in Botetourt County, 
about 20 miles away.  I sit on the back porch of my friend's historic home and 
make lace for 2 days.  No admission is charged and I ask for nothing but a cup 
of tea which I can make myself in Bea's kitchen.  

In June, I've been invited to demonstrate at the Wilderness Museum in Pulaski 
Co., Virginia.  There will be a quilt show and the coordinator thought that it 
would be fun to show how quilt embellishments can be made.  She'll be tatting.  
That will be fun.  

As many of you know, Friend Husband Clive and I travel quite alot in our motor 
home.  We stop in an RV Park about 2 p.m., set-up, put out the awning, and I 
begin lacemaking.  It doesn't take long before I have several visitors checking 
out tatting and my getting lots of compliments.  I could never do that! 
Wonder if I can turn in those hourshum

Happy Lacemaking,
Betty Ann in Roanoke, Virginia USA

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Re: [lace-chat] scotland to change place names?

2005-04-05 Thread Scotlace
speaking as an exiled Scot I would say that piece was written with tongue 
very firmly in cheek.  And it's not neccessarily an April fool joke  -  Just 
Scottish humour aimed to show hoq ridiculous PC can be.

Patricia in Wales
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[lace-chat] scotland names (long)

2005-04-05 Thread Thurlow Weed
I'm pleased to know that it appears to be the EU Parliament pulling a 
fast one on us. When I sent the original email, I hadn't much time at 
hand, but have since googled and found nothing about this. I did, 
however, find all manner of fascinating sites with things about Scottish 
Gaelic and English translations.

I was concerned that all this PC stuff had gotten quite out of hand -- 
goodness knows it's bad enough in the US. My email program (Mozilla) 
sends forwards as attachments, so I'm hesitant to send the fwd to the 
list, not knowing how it will show up. So I'll try the cut and paste 
method here. Ah, it looks like it's going to work.

Black day as EU fools with place names
EUROPEAN bureaucrats will push forward legislation today to force the 
Scottish Executive to change place-names that offend or discriminate on 
the grounds of race and gender.
In a move the Nationalists described as the ultimate madness in 
political correctness, it has taken only a quorum of four Euro 
commissioners from Italy, Germany, France and Spain to redraw Scotland's 
map.
The German commissioner, Arlo Pilof, the architect of the 2006 Race and 
Gender Equality Imposition Code (conformity), an amendment to existing 
rules, said: We believe many names do not conform, and we started with 
Scotland because it is the worst of the culprits with offensive names 
such as Skinflats, near Grangemouth.
However, he promised the Scottish Executive could apply for grants of up 
to 43.6 million (28 million) to facilitate change.
That was dismissed yesterday by the Scottish Chambers of Commerce as a 
drop in the ocean. A spokesman said: Changing stationery and business 
cards could cost that alone.
The commissioners in Brussels have demanded race and gender-sensitive 
names found for towns such as Motherwell, Blackburn, Helensburgh, Fort 
William, Campbeltown, Peterhead, Lewis and Fraserburgh be changed.
A Scottish parliamentary group, set up in anticipation of the 
legislation, has made a start. Fort William, in the shadow of Britain's 
highest mountain, would become Fort Nevis by 2006, under one suggestion.
Edinburgh City Council is considering revising Arthur's Seat because the 
commissioners said its ancient name contained sexual undertones likely 
to offend those visiting Edinburgh.
Under the new amendment the word Glen could be banned as 
gender-biased. Scotland Office officials have suggested a change to 
Vale, as in Valecoe and the Great Vale.
An SNP spokesperson said: This is monstrous buffoonery, an outrageous 
waste of resources and politically correct madness.
I understand, for example, that North Lanarkshire Council will consider 
plans to change Motherwell to Parentwell, the spokesperson said. What 
is Dunbartonshire going to do with Helensburgh?
Under European rules going back to 1986, a quorum of four member state 
commissioners have the right to table what is known as a L.I.L Proof 
A, a prelude to any legislation which proposes to amend or remove a 
name or description relating to a city, town or centre of habitation 
with more than eight people of voting age.
The four commissioners tabled the L.I.L Proof A in December and today 
the legislation will go before a committee of ten commissioners. It is 
expected to be law by 1 April, 2006.
The Scottish Executive had sought to win exemptions for places beginning 
with Black, but the bureaucrats were adamant they were racist.
We could hardly have places like Colouredford or the Coloured Isle, the 
Coloured Cuillins, said a spokesman.
However, the Executive has come up with an alternative, to revert to the 
Gaelic rendition of black - dubh - which it believes will be acceptable.
The spokesman added: They won't know the difference, hopefully. And 
Burndubh and Dubhford don't sound too bad.
However, the greatest difficulty will be experienced by the producers of 
Ordnance Survey maps.
A spokesman said: This is a nightmare, amending every map. I understand 
there will be a hiatus, where old maps are acceptable. But new maps will 
have to be in place by 2007.
More cartographers will be needed and the process of re-tooling 
machines will begin next year.
Inevitably, the cost will be high and prices will go up. We estimate, 
for example, a map such as the Landranger series for North Skye will 
retail at 94.20 by 2007.
Mr Pilof revealed that England would be next on the agenda, citing the 
Isle of Man as particularly worthy of change.
A Manx spokesman said yesterday: I hope this is a long way off. We are 
two-time losers, what with the island's name and Douglas as the capital. 
It's ridiculous, isn't it?
It's as if these people sat there all day and made up this stuff.

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