wayaki. The husband cannot refuse to take care of his wife regardless of having a job or even being a millionaire. If she was a millionaire and she wanted him to take care of her financially then he HAS to do that. It is her right and it is one of the conditions of getting married. The Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wassalam) said to get married and if you cannot afford to then fast because fasting decreases the sexual desire.
You shouldn't says "insha'allah" with her not marrying again. She should marry again if she can find a good brother. There was a sister that was divorced 11 times within one community, but that didn't make her give up on marriage. Don't blame the institution of marriage because of the people. Blame the people who make marriage a bad thing. It is your duty to find out everything before marrying someone instead of rushing in and then blaming islam or marriage because that bad person. The ones who went to marry non-muslim men, didn't marry anyone but are living a life of adultery. Their marriage to non-muslims doesn't count and is invalid so their life is of that an adulterous woman. Any children they have will be illegitimate children. She is committing many major sins with such union. It would have been better for to get married and get divorced so many times than to be married to a kaffir. She would atleast be married islamicly and divorced islamicly and would not be committing any major sin (especially zina) and she would be compensated in her akhirah for all her suffering. It is very important for women (and men too, but especially women) to do a proper research on the guy before marrying. Just because he has a beard, prays in the masjid, talks with islamic words all the time, it doesn't mean he is religious or will be a good husband. Don't be fooled by things that can be used to fool someone. If you are not a good judge of character then find someone people who are and then have them with you when you meet the person, and meet him (or her) several times. Many times people don't do their part of proper investigation and then blame the wrong things (like Islam or marriage). The sisters who reverted to Islam, need to be extra careful since they are usually high on faith and believe the other person to be good like themselves so they don't do deep investigation. p.s. If you don't know already, the number 786 doesn't mean "Bismillah" like what many desis believe. Re: Proper ruling on multiple marriages Posted by: "J M" J M jmugh786 Thu Sep 18, 2008 4:11 pm (PDT) Jazak'Allaahao Khayran brother....you were specific.....quite detailed....you 100% answered my questions.? ¦ I believe that you were the only one to provide the exact response that I needed.... ? ¦ In regards to the "walk away" phrase--it? ¦ makes reference? ¦ to the request for the khulu because the "brother" is financially secure? ¦ and refused to support his most recent? ¦ wife because? ¦ she is educated.? ¦ He even refused to buy her a cup of coffee!? ¦ ? ¦ (Alhamdullilah, the imam granted her request last Monday for? ¦ the khulu because her ex-husband? ¦ was requesting for her to return the cost of her ring ($800) and additional monies totalling over $1500 (which she doesn't have).? ¦ The ring was part of the agreement as her only request as? ¦ her mahr because she thought he? ¦ was not financially capable of more.? ¦ He knew that she was unemployed and had promised to take care of her and her children until she found a job; but he went on to marry another sister who? ¦ is supporting him.? ¦ Nevertheless, he did leave a couple of? ¦ his other wives financially secure (while the others,? ¦ he simply walked away from the marriages).? ¦ ? ¦ This is the sister's second failed marriage, and Inshaallah, she hopes to never marry again.? ¦ Other? ¦ divorced sisters that she knew all went on to remain single or did marry non-Muslim men. ? ¦ Inshaallah she will be able to find a job and be able to take care of her children. ? ¦ Waa'Salaam Alaaikum brother j786SURAH22 --- On Fri, 9/12/08, [EMAIL PROTECTED] <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> Subject: Bismillah [IslamCity] Re: Proper ruling on multiple marriages To: "eGroup For Muslims Around The World" <islamcity@yahoogroups.com> Date: Friday, September 12, 2008, 8:01 PM As-Salaamu 'Alaykum, ? ¦ I think I will have to answer these questions because of what is coming up afterwards.. . so my answers are below after the questions in red colored text. ? ¦ wa'l salaamu alaykum ? ¦ Re: Proper ruling on multiple marriages From: J M Sent: Sunday, September 07, 2008 3:36 AM Subject: Proper ruling on multiple marriages Asalamalaikum waa'rahmatullah waa'barakatuhu, 1. What is the proper ruling on multiple marriages? A man is allowed to marry up to four woman maximum, IF he can give them their rights and if he cannot then he is not allowed to marry more. Some of their (wives') rights are equal spending on each, equal time shared, equal treatment, their private residence (unless they agree to share one residence, but still then private rooms minimum). 2. Can the man marry more than one woman at a time, and not inform the wives of each other? Yes he can, but it would better for him and them that he informs and talks with them first. It part of kind treatment that he talks his wife first to make it easier for her. 3. Can the woman seek khulu (without his permission to accept her decision to divorce) if she did not consent to a polygamous marriage or informed of other wives before she married the man? That depends on what took place before marriage. Did she ask him if he was single or did he state he was single? If he deceived her with his lieings then she has a valid reason for khula. You might have heard of a virginity case in france where the woman said she was chaste (virgin) before marrying the man but afterwards it was revealed that she lied so he took her to the court for a divorce and the french court granted on the premise of lieing of a condition (virginity) that was met to be married. 4. Can she walk away from the marriage where there has been deceit and non-financial support of her? What is walk away? just leave? she is still his wife and until there is a divorce or a khula, she remains his wife. If she is silent? ¦ about? ¦ it then she accepted it, so cannot just walk away. If she is ok with it then she has to ask for her rights. I know what is Sunnah but some brothers have made mutaa marriages commonplace. Mutaa marriage of any kind is forbidden in Islam!? ¦ There are other marriages, similar to mutah marriage, in egypt that is practiced and it is even worse than muta marriage because it is nothing but a front for a summer fling. The scholars of egypt have even spoken against this. Waa'Salaam j786SURAH22
