...Maashaallah very wise words...
Barakallahu fiik
j786SURAH22
--- On Sat, 9/20/08, [EMAIL PROTECTED] <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Subject: Bismillah [IslamCity] Re: Proper ruling on multiple marriages
To: "eGroup For Muslims Around The World" <islamcity@yahoogroups.com>
Date: Saturday, September 20, 2008, 12:36 AM
wayaki. The husband cannot refuse to take care of his wife regardless of having
a job or even being a millionaire. If she was a millionaire and she wanted him
to take care of her financially then he HAS to do that. It is her right and it
is one of the conditions of getting married. The Prophet (sallallahu alayhi
wassalam) said to get married and if you cannot afford to then fast because
fasting decreases the sexual desire.
You shouldn't says "insha'allah" with her not marrying again. She should marry
again if she can find a good brother. There was a sister that was divorced 11
times within one community, but that didn't make her give up on marriage. Don't
blame the institution of marriage because of the people. Blame the people who
make marriage a bad thing. It is your duty to find out everything before
marrying someone instead of rushing in and then blaming islam or marriage
because that bad person.
The ones who went to marry non-muslim men, didn't marry anyone but are living a
life of adultery. Their marriage to non-muslims doesn't count and is invalid so
their life is of that an adulterous woman. Any children they have will be
illegitimate children. She is committing many major sins with such union. It
would have been better for to get married and get divorced so many times than
to be married to a kaffir. She would atleast be married islamicly and divorced
islamicly and would not be committing any major sin (especially zina) and she
would be compensated in her akhirah for all her suffering.
It is very important for women (and men too, but especially women) to do a
proper research on the guy before marrying. Just because he has a beard, prays
in the masjid, talks with islamic words all the time, it doesn't mean he is
religious or will be a good husband. Don't be fooled by things that can be used
to fool someone. If you are not a good judge of character then find someone
people who are and then have them with you when you meet the person, and meet
him (or her) several times. Many times people don't do their part of proper
investigation and then blame the wrong things (like Islam or marriage). The
sisters who reverted to Islam, need to be extra careful since they are usually
high on faith and believe the other person to be good like themselves so they
don't do deep investigation.
p.s. If you don't know already, the number 786 doesn't mean "Bismillah" like
what many desis believe.
Re: Proper ruling on multiple marriages
Posted by: "J M" J M jmugh786
Thu Sep 18, 2008 4:11 pm (PDT)
Jazak'Allaahao Khayran brother....you were specific.... .quite detailed.... you
100% answered my questions.€ ¦ I believe that you were the only one to provide
the exact response that I needed....
€ ¦
In regards to the "walk away" phrase--it€ ¦ makes reference€ ¦ to the request
for the khulu because the "brother" is financially secure€ ¦ and refused to
support his most recent€ ¦ wife because€ ¦ she is educated.€ ¦ He even refused
to buy her a cup of coffee!€ ¦ € ¦ (Alhamdullilah, the imam granted her
request last Monday for€ ¦ the khulu because her ex-husband€ ¦ was requesting
for her to return the cost of her ring ($800) and additional monies totalling
over $1500 (which she doesn't have).€ ¦ The ring was part of the agreement as
her only request as€ ¦ her mahr because she thought he€ ¦ was not financially
capable of more.€ ¦ He knew that she was unemployed and had promised to take
care of her and her children until she found a job; but he went on to marry
another sister who€ ¦ is supporting him.€ ¦ Nevertheless, he did leave a
couple of€ ¦ his other wives
financially secure (while the others,€ ¦ he simply walked away from the
marriages).€ ¦
€ ¦
This is the sister's second failed marriage, and Inshaallah, she hopes to never
marry again.€ ¦ Other€ ¦ divorced sisters that she knew all went on to remain
single or did marry non-Muslim men.
€ ¦
Inshaallah she will be able to find a job and be able to take care of her
children.
€ ¦
Waa'Salaam Alaaikum brother
j786SURAH22
--- On Fri, 9/12/08, [EMAIL PROTECTED] com <[EMAIL PROTECTED] com> wrote:
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] com <[EMAIL PROTECTED] com>
Subject: Bismillah [IslamCity] Re: Proper ruling on multiple marriages
To: "eGroup For Muslims Around The World" <[EMAIL PROTECTED] ps.com>
Date: Friday, September 12, 2008, 8:01 PM
As-Salaamu 'Alaykum,
€ ¦
I think I will have to answer these questions because of what is coming up
afterwards.. . so my answers are below after the questions in red colored text.
€ ¦
wa'l salaamu alaykum
€ ¦
Re: Proper ruling on multiple marriages
From: J M
Sent: Sunday, September 07, 2008 3:36 AM
Subject: Proper ruling on multiple marriages
Asalamalaikum waa'rahmatullah waa'barakatuhu,
1. What is the proper ruling on multiple marriages? A man is allowed to marry
up to four woman maximum, IF he can give them their rights and if he cannot
then he is not allowed to marry more. Some of their (wives') rights are equal
spending on each, equal time shared, equal treatment, their private residence
(unless they agree to share one residence, but still then private rooms
minimum).
2. Can the man marry more than one woman at a time, and not inform the wives of
each other? Yes he can, but it would better for him and them that he informs
and talks with them first. It part of kind treatment that he talks his wife
first to make it easier for her.
3. Can the woman seek khulu (without his permission to accept her decision to
divorce) if she did not consent to a polygamous marriage or informed of other
wives before she married the man? That depends on what took place before
marriage. Did she ask him if he was single or did he state he was single? If he
deceived her with his lieings then she has a valid reason for khula. You might
have heard of a virginity case in france where the woman said she was chaste
(virgin) before marrying the man but afterwards it was revealed that she lied
so he took her to the court for a divorce and the french court granted on the
premise of lieing of a condition (virginity) that was met to be married.
4. Can she walk away from the marriage where there has been deceit and
non-financial support of her? What is walk away? just leave? she is still his
wife and until there is a divorce or a khula, she remains his wife. If she is
silent€ ¦ about€ ¦ it then she accepted it, so cannot just walk away. If she is
ok with it then she has to ask for her rights.
I know what is Sunnah but some brothers have made mutaa marriages commonplace.
Mutaa marriage of any kind is forbidden in Islam!€ ¦ There are other marriages,
similar to mutah marriage, in egypt that is practiced and it is even worse than
muta marriage because it is nothing but a front for a summer fling. The
scholars of egypt have even spoken against this.
Waa'Salaam
j786SURAH22
------------------------------------
***************************************************************************
{Invite (mankind, O Muhammad ) to the Way of your Lord (i.e. Islam) with wisdom
(i.e. with the Divine Inspiration and the Qur'an) and fair preaching, and argue
with them in a way that is better. Truly, your Lord knows best who has gone
astray from His Path, and He is the Best Aware of those who are guided.} (Holy
Quran-16:125)
{And who is better in speech than he who [says: "My Lord is Allah (believes in
His Oneness)," and then stands straight (acts upon His Order), and] invites
(men) to Allah's (Islamic Monotheism), and does righteous deeds, and says: "I
am one of the Muslims."} (Holy Quran-41:33)
The prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "By Allah, if
Allah guides one person by you, it is better for you than the best types of
camels." [al-Bukhaaree, Muslim]
The prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) also said, "Whoever
calls to guidance will have a reward similar to the reward of the one who
follows him, without the reward of either of them being lessened at all."
[Muslim, Ahmad, Aboo Daawood, an-Nasaa'ee, at-Tirmidhee, Ibn Maajah]
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Recommended:
http://www.ikhwanweb.com
http://www.islamonline.net
http://www.islam-guide.com
http://www.prophetmuhammadforall.org
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
All views expressed herein belong to the individuals concerned and do not in
any way reflect the official views of IslamCity unless sanctioned or approved
otherwise.
If your mailbox clogged with mails from IslamCity, you may wish to get a daily
digest of emails by logging-on to http://www.yahoogroups.com to change your
mail delivery settings or email the moderators at [EMAIL PROTECTED] with the
title "change to daily digest". Yahoo! Groups Links
<*> To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/islamcity/
<*> Your email settings:
Individual Email | Traditional
<*> To change settings online go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/islamcity/join
(Yahoo! ID required)
<*> To change settings via email:
mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
<*> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
<*> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to:
http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/
