Re: [lace-chat] Chestnut adventure

[Lynn Carpenter]

"Jane Viking Swanson"  wrote:

>Hi All,  DH got a bunch of edible chestnuts a couple weeks ago.  THe spiny
>pods opened up to reveal the brown nuts.  Then he broke some open and has
>been eating the raw ones and giving me some.
(snip)
>I ate some of the roasted ones and I still don't like them very much.  They
>are so mealy in texture.  DH is still eating them.  I do like the delicate
>flavor but I had expected something crunchy.

Hi, Jane & all,

Some chestnut research has been done near me using Chinese hybrid 
chestnuts.  When we first moved to our house, we found trees on the farm 
next door and got some of the nuts to plant.  Our nuts are now small trees 
that have just started to bear in the last year or two.  Time flies!


I have to agree on the texture.  The farm down the road that is producing 
them now had a charcoal grill and was roasting them when the closest little 
town had a mini-festival after Thanksgiving.  They smell good, but the 
texture is like garbanzo beans.


Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/
Ravelry ID: alwen

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[lace-chat] the tall Dutch

[Lynn Carpenter]

Hazel Smith <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Here in Holland we find the top
>shelves in the supermarkets are too high for us to
>reach because the Dutch are on average much taller
>than Brits. We chuckle and say "It's so anti-British"

That's for sure!  In the US, I'm about average height for a woman, but in
the Netherlands I felt like I was looking at everyone's belt buckles.  But
my husband had it worse -- once I remember him coming out of a bathroom
totally flustered, as the height of the urinal in it was too high!

I read somewhere that the Dutch had the tallest average height in the
world.  Now I can't find where I read that, but I believe it.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] recipes with cloves

[Lynn Carpenter]

The chili recipe my mom (which came from my dad's Aunt Ruth) always uses
has cloves, the spice, in it.  My husband likes to add the garlic -- but
that's not on the recipe!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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Re: [lace-chat] I know it is not lace

[Lynn Carpenter]

"Dora Northern" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>I know it is not lace, but I just had to show off with some of the work which
>were done in my Upholstery classes.
>They all worked very hard and we had much fun as well.
>
>My next webpage will show all my pictures I made in lace.So please forgive me
>showing chairs, but you must admit lace would not look very well on it.
>
>http://theknotter.atspace.com

Your webpage opened all right for me -- and I have the same rule when I
vacuum under the chair cushions:
"Anything found in chairs or sofas belongs to the (vacuum-er) especially
money."

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] Re: Christmas too early

[Lynn Carpenter]

Tamara P Duvall <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>I have my own "beef" with "premie Christmas" and it's the Christmas 
>trees disappearing, by Dec 15 or wearlier. Our supplier sets up on the 
>Friday after Thanksgiving and is gone  (sold out? given up?) sometime 
>between Dec 10 and 15. But, in Poland, we don't set up our "home" tree 
>until Dec 24th (Christmas Eve). And we don't take it down till Jan 6th 
>(Epiphany). Even a dyed-in-the-wool atheist like myself knows that.

I'm lucky:  living in SW Outer Nowhere has the side benefit that Christmas
trees are grown here.  Although I do see several shipments of them on
trucks early in November (no wonder the needles fall off!), with a little
effort I can still cut my own a week or so before Christmas.

>For all the fuss that's being made in US about the godless liberals 
>declaring a war on Christmas it's the theofascists, driven by profits, 
>who have taken both the meaning and the magic out of the holiday. I 
>used to love Christmas but don't anymore.

I spend a lot of time in stores turning my head, looking the other way, and
practically plugging my ears and singing "la la la" to avoid even seeing
all the "Buy buy buy now now now" that goes on.

Not to mention that snow is now a hit-and-miss thing for Christmas.  When I
was growing up only 60 miles from here, we always had snow for Christmas,
sometimes for Thanksgiving.  Whether it's "global warming" or not, we have
certainly experienced a considerable change from then (1960's and 70's) to
now.

This year we had no snow for Christmas, still no snow now, and temperatures
near 50 degrees F.  Pfui!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] battenburg lace

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hello all,
   
  I hope this new year finds you all well...I have a question.  Where could I 
find the little lace tape used in making battenburg lace.  Jane V. has inspired 
me to check it out and see what I can do.  Thank you all in advance for any 
advice.
   
  Love, Lynn
  WV.

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[lace-chat] secret pal

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Ho Ho Ho Hello,
   
  I know dumb huh, well I got a secret pal package on Saturday, I am glad 
nothing in it was breakable because the poor box was crushed.  The stocking is 
oh so beautiful, it will hang up every year,  the scarf is excellent, I bet it 
took quite a while to make.  The candle,  love the smell of Christmas 
cookies, my oven doesn't work so this fools the nose quite fine, the wolf 
scented picture is hanging at the computer desk, DH confiscated it, we collect 
Indian, wolves and eagle things, so even after the smell is gone he will still 
be here watching over us.  I thank you for all these goodies, I can't wait to 
find out who you are.  Till next time.
   
  Happy Holidays to you and yours, Love, Lynn

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[lace-chat] Grinch name

[Lynn Weasenforth]

I just got this in my email from another group it is a hoot, enjoy.
   
  Love, Lynn
   
  P.S. I hope it works, I don't know if you can click or paste either way it's 
cute.
   
   http://www.yourgeekfriend.com/GrinchName/GrinchName.php  

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[lace-chat] christmas exchange

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Wow
   
  Hello all, 
   
  I just recieved the most beautiful piece of lace that I have ever seen in my 
life, it is exquisite.  I hope someday I can do something like that.  Even my 
DH who kind of poo poos the lace stuff said. "hmm she's pretty good huh"  that 
is an extremely big compliment coming from him.  He is my grizzly 
bearbetween us he's really a teddy bear.  My dear Jane, I am so blessed to 
have gotten this, it brought me to tears it is so beautiful.  The card is just 
as masterful.  These will go in a frame after the holidays.  Thank you so very 
much.  Did you ever get yours, my son said he mailed it last week, if you 
didn't please let me know and I will get after him.
   
  Again, Wow!!!
  Love, Lynn

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[lace-chat] Latvian mittens at Riga NATO summit

[Lynn Carpenter]

Take a look at the awesome mittens -- 4500 pairs -- given away at the NATO
summit.

Habetrot's blog, where I heard about it:
http://habetrot.typepad.com/habetrot/2006/12/a_treasure_trov.html

Mitten galleries from the Riga summit webpages:

Latvian women`s mittens from the Latgale region, 9 pages (a full page shows
20 mittens!)
http://www.rigasummit.lv/en/id/gallery/nid/114/

Latvian men`s mittens from the Latgale region, 9 pages
http://www.rigasummit.lv/en/id/gallery/nid/115/

Latvian women`s mittens from the Kurzeme region, 6 pages
http://www.rigasummit.lv/en/id/gallery/nid/116/

Latvian men`s mittens from the Kurzeme region, 9 pages
http://www.rigasummit.lv/en/id/gallery/nid/117/

Latvian women`s mittens from the Zemgale region, 9 pages
http://www.rigasummit.lv/en/id/gallery/nid/118/

Latvian men`s mittens from the Zemgale region, 9 pages
http://www.rigasummit.lv/en/id/gallery/nid/119/

Latvian men`s mittens from the Vidzeme region, 8 pages
http://www.rigasummit.lv/en/id/gallery/nid/120/

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] bobbins

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hello all,
   
  My bobbins arrived safely today, they are beautiful.  Each on has a saying on 
it.
  One has blue bead and the initials is GOWC=I am a proud member of the Grumpy 
Old Ladies Club!  with a blue flower painted on it.  The second has red beads 
with red flowers painted on it, it says:  Bobbins are like shoes, you can never 
have enough and you should alway buy in pairs!  
   
  They are so beautiful, Thank you for letting me have the chance to win.  
Love, Lynn

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[lace-chat] secret pal

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hi,
   
  Just wanted to say that I got the most beautiful book in the mail.  It's 
Brudges Lace,  there was no return address so I will assume that it is from my 
secret pal.
   
  Thank you so much, Lynn

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[lace-chat] Christmas card partner

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hi,
   
  Ok, we have moved and apparently so did all my saved mail.  Can someone tell 
me who my partner is again?
   
  Thank you, Lynn

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Re: [lace-chat] how government works and recycling

[Lynn Carpenter]

Rosemary Naish <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Someone who only had their recycling collected fortnightly, but had 
>also been the recipient of an edict forbidding food waste in the 
>ordinary bin, asked her local council what to do with the remains of 
>her sunday roast chicken until the recycling bin was collected. The 
>official, and absolutely serious, answer was either not have roast 
>meals until just before the bin was due to be collected or to put the 
>remains in her freezer until collection day!

We live in what I often call "Southwest outer Nowhere", and we don't have
trash pickup.  Instead, our taxes to the local township pay for something
called a "transfer station", which is basically a pickup point for all of
our trash.  The transfer station is open on Saturdays, and we haul our
trash there.  Each year they issue us a punch card, and if you use it up,
you have to buy another.

We recycle and compost most of our trash, but for fatty or greasy things
like the chicken bones (which don't go into the compost heap, because
caterwauling raccoons at 3am wake both me and the dogs!), we do keep a
labelled bag in the freezer.  Often we skip a week between trips to the
transfer station, and I'm sure two-week-old chicken scraps would get pretty
unpleasant if we didn't freeze them.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] "three snakes on a large round pillow"

[Lynn Carpenter]

Rosemary Naish <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>I also like the idea floated earlier of having three snakes on a large 
>round pillow, so several people could have a go at once. So often when 
>someone else is using the "have a go" pillow a child has wanted to try 
>but couldn't wait long enough.

I read this message, and since I understood what it was about, it didn't
really strike me until later how calmly I had read the phrase "three snakes
on a large round pillow".

Then it struck me as very funny!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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Re: [lace-chat] another strange 'lace' tool

[Lynn Carpenter]

Alice Howell <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Here is a lacemaking board that's different.  Any
>clues, anyone?
>
>http://cgi.ebay.com/antique-sewing-tool-lace-making-or-knitting-1800_W0QQit
emZ280009330998

Looks to this weaver like a warping paddle!  Here is a much plainer wooden
one in an eBay store:
http://cgi.ebay.com/Wood-warping-paddle-hand-weaving-tool-weaver-warp_W0QQit
emZ8257312619

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] Hot as, er, heck

[Lynn Carpenter]

Tamara P Duvall <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>On Jun 14, 2006, at 22:44, Lynn Carpenter wrote:
>
the other announcer did wonder 
>> how hot
>> it actually got in Hell.  (Rarely over 100 degrees F.)
>
>I no longer have the URL but, at the time, I printed out the photo: the 
>town's name on a post, which you see as you enter the town. With 
>icicles hanging off of it... I've laminated the photo and it still 
>hangs on the fridge, providing my daily dose of amusement. It's also a 
>great tool in the cause of efficiency: whenever someone (like DH) asks 
>me to do something unreasonable, all I have to do is point... :)

Here's one place to find it:
http://www.cybersalt.org/cl_images/1zz/signs/signhell.jpg

And if you ever want to find out how hot :) it is in Hell, (Michigan) or if
Hell has frozen over, you can look up Livingston county weather here:

http://weather.noaa.gov/cgi-bin/iwszone?Sites=:miz068

or here:

http://weather.noaa.gov/weather/current/KOZW.html

(Obviously way too much time on my hands tonight!)
Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] Re: Team Names

[Lynn Carpenter]

Joy's post reminded me of one of the local high school's team names:
the Rams.

But what do they call the girls' teams?

(This one makes me snort/laugh every time I see it.)

The "Lady Rams".

I'm getting the silly giggles just typing it out!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] Drat, forgot to email this!

[Lynn Carpenter]

*sigh*

Just found this half-written email in my Out box, not sent.

I was listening to the BBC World Service on the radio last week, and was
surprised to hear the announcers talking to someone in Hell, Michigan.
(This was Monday night, just before "6/6/06".)

I think we talked about the place back when we were sharing webcams around
the world, or maybe just talking about odd place names.

Anyway, it really tickled my funnybone to hear the announcer solemnly
asking someone in Hell what he thought was going to happen.  And
predictably, after they thanked him, the other announcer did wonder how hot
it actually got in Hell.  (Rarely over 100 degrees F.)

It's a tiny place, hardly a dot on the map.

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Re: [lace-chat] World Cup

[Lynn Carpenter]

"Jean Nathan" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Just watching USA playing football against the Czech Republic in the FIFA 
>World Cup (soccer to those in the US, and incidentally USA is currently 
>losing 2-0), and it got me wondering how the team came about. We don't hear 
>about it being played in schools,

Since I don't watch TV or follow sports, I have missed most of this, except
for some depressing commentary on the radio about the US team's, er,
performance.

But soccer is played enough here that the phrase "soccer mom" shows up in
Wikipedia!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soccer_mom

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] sirens

[Lynn Carpenter]

"Sue" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Our town air raid sirens are also still used as a flood warning, about once
>a year they are tested and although I cannot remember the war they still
>give me the creeps when they go off.

The sirens around here mark the 10-mile boundary for a nuclear power plant.
 If they go off, I'm afraid I'd have more than the creeps. :(

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] Re: What's the term?

[Lynn Carpenter]

Tamara P Duvall <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>On May 6, 2006, at 11:09, Lynn Carpenter wrote:
>
>> And I don't know if this one counts -- I always think it sounds like a
>> tattoo-and-piercing place -- there is a law firm that advertises on 
>> one of
>> the public radio stations I listen to called "Harness, Dickey & 
>> Pierce".
>
>Sounds like owners of an SM club to me. Though, I suppose, equally 
>suitable for a law firm :)

Intellectual property lawyers -- is that close enough? ;D
Harness, Dickey & Pierce website:
http://www.hdp.com/

The opening page alone says "l a w y e r s" ! all over it.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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Re: [lace-chat] What's the term?

[Lynn Carpenter]

I remember going on vacation with my parents and driving through a little
town where the dentist's name was "Dr. Paine".

And I don't know if this one counts -- I always think it sounds like a
tattoo-and-piercing place -- there is a law firm that advertises on one of
the public radio stations I listen to called "Harness, Dickey & Pierce".

It's true, really, try Googling them!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] gammon

[Lynn Carpenter]

"David in Ballarat" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>NOw I've just been talking with a cousin who wants me to ask all you
>knowledgeable folk whether anyone uses the word "gammon".

The only place I've ever seen "gammon" was in Beatrix Potter's "The Pie and
the Patty-Pan", where the magpie says "Gammon and spinach!"

:)


Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] Re: paraffin

[Lynn Carpenter]

Joy Beeson <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Jean Nathan wrote:
>
>> It's not paraffin wax. It's a bit like petrol (gas) but not so volatile. 
>> Used to be used here a lot in free standing room heaters 
>
>I'm pretty sure that your paraffin is our kerosene.  There
>used to be a little kerosene pump at the side of every
>filling station, but you can't buy kerosene at all now, let
>alone by the gallon.

Guess that's a regional thing -- here in SW Michigan, there are still
regular pumps at many gas stations labelled "kerosene".  They sell it for
use in kerosene heaters.


Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] Re: Writing (was: Editing )

[Lynn Carpenter]

When I was in college, we were sternly told that when we described our lab
work, it should always be in the impersonal and passive voice.  Thus

"Fifty-seven cubic centimeters of water were added to the soil mixture
containing three varieties of petunia seed."

Hey!  Wake up!  No snoring on lace-chat!

I hated writing like that.  Who added that water?  What, did it just
materialize over the soil like a tiny miniature rainstorm?  Godlike,
indeed, if so!

Most of my grammar is self-taught.  The English teacher I had in high
school -- hah!  A woman so boring I can't even remember her name without
searching through my old mildewy yearbook.  She obviously didn't love
teaching English.

I learned far more English puzzling my way through Dickens and Sir Arthur
Conan Doyle, and can remember being in complete sympathy with Amy Carter
bringing a book to a state dinner.


Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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Re: [lace-chat] Terry Pratchett

[Lynn Carpenter]

Helen <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Lace and fantasy/sci-fi readers isn't a combination I would 
>necessarily have put together but I don't know why.  Somehow, through 
>sheer fluke, I've managed to get a copy of the Soul Music animation 
>on DVDand my brother's got the Wyrd Sisters DVD.  I've received every 
>book since Jingo as either a birthday or a Christmas present.

I've built up a collection of them all through "Thief of Time".  I even
have "Strata", which doesn't seem to have turned up in the round of
reprints and American releases.

http://news.independent.co.uk/media/article344232.ece

I noted this quote from the article above:
" . . . a 6ft 7in Dutchman will play Death in person."

I don't generally feel short in the US, but when we went to the Netherlands
-- well, let's just say I haven't looked so many belt buckles in the eye
since I was in grade school!


Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] Re: favourite authors

[Lynn Carpenter]

"Sharon Whiteley" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:

>My all-time favourite author is Terry Pratchett.

Hooray, another Terry Pratchett fan!  I hate to say "Me, too", but I'll say
it anyway.

The only time I got really mad reading one was when it turned out to be a
bowdlerized "Americanized" version where Mr. Dibbler's famous
sausages-inna-bun had been somehow turned into "hot dogs".  Ack. :P

Talk about wanting to reach out and smack some silly editor.  Or maybe feed
the gormless soul a sausage-inna-bun!  I hate it when they do that.  Lucky
for Dickens he doesn't live now, or we'd be reading "It was the best and
worst of times."


Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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[lace-chat] subscribe

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hello all,

I need some help please, we have been going around and around with verizon 
and our msn. now it is straightened out and I need to subscribed to lace and 
lace chat under my new email address, which is [EMAIL PROTECTED]   The 
problem is I have tried to subscribe and it won't let me.  Any advice as to 
what I am doing wrong.  I didn't want to unsubscribe with this email until I 
got it squared away with the other, could that be my problem?


Thank you



Lynn
[EMAIL PROTECTED]

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[lace-chat] looking for someone

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Sorry to post but Shirley McDaniel please write me, I tried to write you but 
it won't go through.


Thank you


Lynn
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[lace-chat] secret pal

[Lynn Weasenforth]

I recieved my package today from my secret pal in England, thank you very 
much, I was wanting to find something new to attempt and the fan pattern 
with the fan bones is scrumptious.  Now my biggest problem is how to do the 
stitches.  I do not yet know how to make lace just by looking at the 
pattern.  If someone could write to me I would be happy to find out what 
kind of stitches and how many bobbins are required.


Thank you again to my secret pal, I can't wait until next month to find out 
who you are.


Lynn
[EMAIL PROTECTED]

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[lace-chat] email change

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hello all,

I have sent a subscribe to lace and lace chat with a new email address, it 
seems that verizon just doesn't want to get our stuff transferred right, 
even though we told them over a month ago.


so I will be [EMAIL PROTECTED] at least for a while.


Lynn
[EMAIL PROTECTED]

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[lace-chat] getting old

[Lynn Weasenforth]

MEMORIES from a friend:


My Dad is cleaning out my grandmother's house (she died in December) and he 
brought me an old Royal Crown Cola bottle. In the bottle top was a stopper 
with a bunch of holes in it. I knew immediately what it was, but my 
daughter had no idea. She thought they had tried to make it a salt shaker 
or something. I knew it as the bottle that sat on the end of the ironing 
board to "sprinkle" clothes with because we didn't have steam irons. Man, I 
am old.


How many do you remember?

Head lights dimmer switches on the floor.
Ignition switches on the dashboard.
Heaters mounted on the inside of the fire wall.
Real ice boxes.
Pant leg clips for bicycles without chain guards.
Soldering irons you heat on a gas burner.
Using hand signals for cars without turn signals.

Older Than Dirt Quiz: Count all the ones that you remember not the ones you 
were told about Ratings at the bottom.


1. Blackjack chewing gum
2. Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water
3 Candy cigarettes
4. Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles
5 Coffee shops or diners with tableside juke boxes
6. Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers
7. Party lines
8. Newsreels before the movie
9. P.F. Flyers
10. Butch wax
11. Telephone numbers with a word prefix (OLive-6933)
12. Peashooters
13. Howdy Doody
14. 45 RPM records
15. S&H Green Stamps
16 Hi-fi's
17 Metal ice trays with lever
18 Mimeograph paper
19 Blue flashbulb
20. Packards
21. Roller skate keys
22. Cork popguns
23. Drive-ins
24. Studebakers
25 Wash tub wringers

If you remembered 0-5 = You're still young
If you remembered 6-10 = You are getting older
If you remembered 11-15 = Don't tell your age,
If you remembered 16-25 = You're older than dirt!

I might be older than dirt but those memories are the best part of my life.

Don't forget to pass this along!!
Especially to all your really OLD friends
=
"Senility Prayer"...God grant me...
The senility to forget the people I never liked
The good fortune to run into the ones that I do
And the eyesight to tell the difference."




Lynn
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[lace-chat] For the aluminum-coifed among us

[Lynn Carpenter]

"On the Effectiveness of Aluminium Foil Helmets:
An Empirical Study"

http://people.csail.mit.edu/rahimi/helmet/

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
http://lost-arts.blogspot.com/

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Re: [lace-chat] Cleaning

[Lynn Carpenter]

 Jane Partridge <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>In message <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>, Alice
>Howell <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> writes
>>At 08:09 AM 10/26/2005, you wrote:
>>>I've been cleaning everything in the house this last month, .
>>>  I have found:...
>>>1 An ENTIRE CLEAN SHELF
>>
>>The SHELF is what I envy the most of your finds!!!
>
>ermm... has anyone seen the floor recently, I seem to have lost it
>somewhere under his computer magazines :-)

I have a table like that, too.  I know it must be under there, otherwise
all that stuff is just levitating !

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Thankful for friends

[Lynn Weasenforth]

  The Difference between Rich/Poor People?

  One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to
the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live.


  They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be
considered a very poor family.


  On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the
trip?"


  It was great, Dad."


  Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.


  Oh yeah," said the son.


  So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father. The
son answered: "I saw that we have one dog and they had four.


  We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a
creek that has no end.


  We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at
night.


  Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.


  We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go
beyond our sight. We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.


  We buy our food, but they grow theirs.


  We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to
protect them."


  The boy's father was speechless Then his son added, "Thanks, Dad, for
showing me how poor we are."


  Isn't perspective a wonderful thing? Makes you wonder what would happen
if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying


  about what we don't have.


  Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!





  Life is too short and friends are too few.

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[lace-chat] help please

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hi,

I just wanted to let you all know that after tomorrow till the first of next
month I will be without a computer. (money problems) anyway, if someone could
send me their home phone number then when I get my secret pal package comes
then I can call them so that maybe they could forward my message for me.  I
really would appreciate it and I will be lost without my link to you all.
Maybe I can get some lacemaking done. 

Please let me know as the computer goes back to the rental place tomorrow
around noon.  Boo Hoo.

Thank you, Lynn

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[lace-chat] Fw: THE OLD TIMER

[Lynn Weasenforth]

THE OLD TIMER
THE OLD TIMER
An 80 year old man went to the doctor for a check-up and the doctor was amazed
at what good shape the guy was in.

The doctor asked, "To what do you attribute your good health?"

The old timer said, "I'm a golfer and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm
up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways."

The doctor said, "Well, I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it.
How old was your dad when he died?"

The old timer said, "Who said my dad's dead?"

The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your dad's still alive? How
old is he?"

The old timer said, "He's 100 yrs old and, in fact, he golfed with me this
morning, and that's why he's still alive ... he's a golfer."

The doctor said, "Well, that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it.

How about your dad's dad? How old was he when he died?" The old timer said,
"Who said my grandpa's dead?"

The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather's still
living! How old is he?"

The old timer said, "He's 118 yrs old."

The doctor was getting frustrated at this point and said, "I guess he went
golfing with you this morning too?"

The old timer said, "No... Grandpa couldn't go this morning because he got
married."

The Doctor said in amazement, "Got married!! Why would a 118-year-old guy want
to get married?"

The old timer said, "Who said he wanted to?"

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[lace-chat] Fw: [AGENT_ORANGE_VETERANS] watch what you say..

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Subject: This is life and it's embarrassments!


Here are 6 reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is
great!
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words
back...or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the Testimonials of a few
people who did

FIRST TESTIMONY:

I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked
loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around
and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word...he
knew better.

SECOND TESTIMONY:

I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy
with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I
was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen working at the store. He
asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I
think I like playing with men's balls."

THIRD TESTIMONY:

My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of
candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the
counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your
nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically. The boy grinned, and I turned
beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never let me forget.

FOURTH TESTIMONY:

While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some
pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after
receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that
if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror,
she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you
don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's
pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this enlightening
exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the
last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The
last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.

FIFTH TESTIMONY:

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old
son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One
day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very
busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something
funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean.
The realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him
if he needed to go, and he said "No". I kept thinking "Oh Lord, that child has
had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me." Then I said, "Danny,
are you SURE you didn't have an accident?" "No," he replied. I just KNEW that
he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soo, I
asked one more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped
up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled "SEE
MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos
laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An elderly couple made
me feel better by thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

LAST TESTIMONY:

This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very
embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before
she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any! We had a
female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and
didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you
promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the
crew did too they were laughing so hard!

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[lace-chat] mail help please

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hello all,

I have a little problem that someone from the UK. could help me please.  My
daughter in law had a baby a little over a month ago.  She was looking on line
and found something that she wants, she is nursing and what she wants is a
protective item that is washable, however they will only ship to the UK.  If
someone could help by her giving me the money and I send it to whoever is
willing plus shipping and such, would or could someone help me out with this?
I would certainly be forever in ones debt.

Just let me know if anyone's interested.  Thank you,

Lynn

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Re: [lace-chat] Calvin & Hobbes

[Lynn Carpenter]

[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
>
>Bill Watterson is, in fact, producing fresh Calvin and Hobbes strips  -  for 
>three months.  They first appeared in the Boston Globe on Monday 4th 
>September.  It may have started on the Sunday but my friends don't get a
Sunday paper.  
>They (my friends) are hoping he will continue past the three months' time 
>limit he has set himself.  He hasn't lost his touch :-)

Well, pooh!

I did some googling, hoping to find these fresh strips online, as my local
newspaper doesn't carry the reprints.  I found this article:

<http://www.mediainfo.com/eandp/news/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1001
220817>

or http://tinyurl.com/cl5go

The page is promoting a complete collection of Calvin & Hobbes strips.

At the bottom it says "The three-volume "Complete Calvin and Hobbes" is
from Andrews McMeel Publishing, whose sister company, Universal, has been
syndicating "Calvin and Hobbes" reruns to promote the book. Interested
newspapers are publishing the strips from Sept. 4 to Dec. 31."

So, darn, it looks like they are reruns.  (We love Calvin & Hobbes around
here:  I just love how Bill Watterson draws.)

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Calvin & Hobbes

[Lynn Carpenter]

My son and I read a long list of online comic strips that our local paper
doesn't carry.  I found yesterday's (Sunday) Calvin & Hobbes relevant, even
though it is a reprint, as Bill Watterson is no longer drawing them:

<http://images.ucomics.com/comics/ch/1994/ch941002.gif>

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Fw: fyi

[Lynn Weasenforth]

>This was written by a guy from KVLY-TV in Fargo; see bottom of msg.
>This is
>   true.  Scary!
>
>
>   This is something that happened to us on the way back from vacation
>last
>   spring. I didn't think much of it until now. The reason we were a
>little
>   suspicious is we had been riding in a jeep all day with 100 degrees
>temps
>   and we stopped at a truck stop for something to drink. When I was
>leaving, a
>   young girl followed me out and asked what kind of cologne I was
>wearing.
>   Well, after 7 hours in the car sweating, I don't think you could
>tell I was
>   or was not wearing any cologne. We just got in the jeep and said no
>thanks.
>
>   Then it was about 3 weeks ago, I was at a service station in
>Birmingham
>   getting gas. It was about 9:30 pm. I was approached by 2 men and 2
>women in
>   a car. The man that was driving asked me 'What kind of perfume do
>you wear?'
>   I was a bit confused and I asked him 'Why?' He said, 'We are selling
>some
>   name brand perfumes, at cheap prices.' I said I had no money. He
>then
>   reached out of the car and handed me paper that was laminated; it
>had many
>   perfumes on it. I looked quickly at it and gave it back. I said,
>have no
>   money. He said it is OK, we take check, cash, or credit cards. Then
>the
>   people in the car began to laugh. I just got in my car and said no
>thanks.
>
>   Then I received this e-mail yesterday and it sent chills up my
>spine. Please
>   read this. It is no joke. Here is the e-mail I was sent-
>
>   
>
>   Dear Friends:
>
>   I know not all of you are women that I am sending this to, but am
>hoping you
>   will share this with your wives, daughters, mothers, sisters, etc.
>Our world
>   seems to be getting crazier by the day. Pipe bombs in mail boxes and
>sickos
>   in parking lots with perfume. Be careful. I was approached yesterday
>   afternoon around 5:30 PM in the Wal-Mart parking lot by two males
>asking
>   what kind of perfume I was wearing. Then they asked if I'd like to
>sample
>   some fabulous scent they were willing to sell me at very reasonable
>rate. I
>   probably would have agreed had I not received an e-mail warning of a
>"Wanna
>   smell this neat perfume?" scam.
>
>   The men continued to stand between parked cars, I guess to wait for
>someone
>   else to hit on. I stopped a lady going towards them, pointing at
>them and
>   told her about how I was sent an e-mail at work about someone
>walking up to
>   you at the malls or in parking lots and asking you to
>
>   SNIFF PERFUME that they are selling at a cheap price.
>
>   THIS IS NOT PERFUME...IT IS ETHER!
>
>   When you sniff it, you'll pass out. They'll take your wallet, your
>valuables
>   and heaven knows what else. If it were not for this e-mail, I
>probably would
>   have sniffed the 'perfume' but thanks to the generosity of an
>e-mailing
>   friend, I was spared whatever might have happened to me. I wanted to
>do the
>   same for you.
>
>   PLEASE PASS THIS ALONG TO ALL YOUR WOMEN FRIENDS AND PLEASE BE ALERT
>AND  BE
>   AWARE. IF YOU ARE A MAN AND RECEIVE THIS, PASS IT ON TO YOUR WOMEN
>FRIENDS.
>
>   Ladies, this happened to me yesterday and I didn't smell the perfume
>either,
>   thanks to this email. This is true. Believe me, I know. I was over
>by Big
>   Lots in the parking lot at lunch time when I was approached.
>
>   So either day or night, it does not matter. There were 3 guys
>together when
>   I was approached. I called the police when I got back to my desk.
>Like the
>   email says above, LET EVERYONE KNOW ABOUT THIS - YOUR FRIENDS,
>FAMILY,
>   CO-WORKERS, whomever. It helped me. The first thing that popped into
>my head
>   was this e-mail warning.
>
>   Dean Krogen
>   KVLY TV 11
>   1350 21 St Ave S
>   Box 1878
>   Fargo ND 58107-1878
>   Phone 701-237-5211
>   Fax   701-232-0493
>   Cell  701-730-0018
>   E-mail  [EMAIL PROTECTED]

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[lace-chat] Fw: [Vets' Wives-Families] Fw: New Priest

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Subject: New Priest

 The elderly priest, speaking to the younger priest, said, "It
was a good idea to replace the first four pews with plush bucket
theater seats. It worked like a charm. The front of the church
fills
first." The young priest nodded, and the old priest continued, "And

you told me a little more beat to the music would bring young
people  back to
church, so I supported you when you brought in that rock 'n
roll gospel choir. We are packed to the balcony."
  "Thank you, Father," answered the young priest. "I am pleased
that you are open to the new ideas of youth."
  "Well," said the elderly priest, "I'm afraid you've gone too far
with the
drive-thru confessional."
  "But, Father," protested the young priest, "my confessions have
nearly doubled since I began that!"
  "I know, son," replied the elderly priest, "but that flashing
neon sign, 'Toot 'n Tell or Go To Hell' CAN NOT stay on the church
roof."

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Re: [lace-chat] Castles on sand

[Lynn Carpenter]

The subject of this email made me think of all the "castles" that are built
here along the Lake Michigan shoreline.  If I take the shortest route to
the lake, I come to a sand cliff about 150 feet high.  The fact that this
is really nothing but a big sand dune has not stopped developers from
building "castles" all along the lakeshore.

Then when the lake level goes up, the lakeshore landowners all yell for
government assistance to keep the sand cliff from washing out from under
their castles.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Re: coffee and tea preferences

[Lynn Carpenter]

Tamara P Duvall <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>I also dislike - intensly - the "floor sweepings" enclosed in the paper 
>bags

I seem to remember reading once that the two lowest grades of tea were:

fannings

and 

dust.

Which probably tells you a lot about where those bits of leaf come from!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
Day 3 of the well pump not working (service guys took the motor away
yesterday).  Modern life, without the running water!

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Re: [lace-chat] moka maker and coffee press

[Lynn Carpenter]

Sylvie Nguyen <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Thank you to the list, as I now know what my coffee
>makers are called in English.  
>
>To add to the variety of coffee makers that we've
>mentioned, I can describe one more.  In the past, my
>father and husband have used single-serving makers
>that are placed on top of coffee cups.  First coffee
>is placed in the small metal drip-type cup.  Next a
>small perforated disk is screwed onto a center post in
>the cup.  Hot water is poured into the metal cup,
>which has been set on top of the coffee cup.  Of
>course, it takes several minutes for all of the hot
>water to drip through.

Oh.  Yes, we actually have one of those, too.  We first saw them when we
ordered Thai coffee at a tiny  Viet Namese restaurant my husband likes, and
later bought one at the Mexican / Viet Namese food store where he buys kim
chi.

I also forgot we do have one small drip machine, besides the others I
mentioned before.  (Is it possible to have too many coffee pots? [twinkle] )

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] secret pal

[Lynn Weasenforth]

To my secret pal,

Well, once again you have outdone yourself, you seem to do that every month.
The glass bobbin will be cherished and on my pillow tonight, the beads and
wire and small bobbin are very beautiful, I take it that I am supposed to make
spangles or a necklace, either way, I love them.  The Dutch shoe magnet is in
my shadow box with all my other special trinkets and the magnet shopping list
is always in demand, but not on my fridge, but next to my pillow.  Thank you
again, I am very lucky to have you as my secret pal.

Bye for now, Love Lynn

Oh by the way, all is well, no more sick kids, but my oldest daughter fell off
my front steps and has a black and blue left knee, on my way to the hospital
with her, she has put it off for two days.  When it rains.

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Re: [lace-chat] coffee plunger

[Lynn Carpenter]

"Malvary J Cole" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Sylvie wrote:  "My coffee is made in what you have called a coffee plunger. 
>The water in put in the bottom portion, the grounds in the middle.  As the 
>water is heated up, it's forced up, through the grounds, into the top 
>portion.
>
>Sylvie, I think what you are describing is a coffee percolator.

I'm something of a coffee-pot connoisseur, and Sylvie's description does
sound something like a percolator, but I think she is describing a "moka
pot".  We have three of these, in three sizes, made in Italy.  This page
shows an example:
http://www.viecokitchen.com/mokexbia.htm

In my house right now, I have percolators (both electric and the stovetop
one we use when camping), vacuum pots, moka pots, and my "coffee saucepan",
a tiny yellow-enamelled saucepan with a percolator insert and a big glass lid.

If it has to do with coffee making, we have probably tried it!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Iraqi Katrina donation

[Lynn Carpenter]

I said I had nothing to add -- I was mistaken.

The article says the total is over a month's pay for the Iraqi soldiers who
collected the money.  My origami-list correspondent said it was over a
*year's* pay for many of the Iraqi people.  I don't know, myself, if Iraqi
soldiers are making 12 times what other Iraqi citizens are making.
(Although I think they probably deserve it for their courage, making
themselves targets of other Iraqis.)

>http://www.defendamerica.mil/articles/sep2005/a090905ms2.html
> 
>It's a report on Iraqi soldiers who collected up a million dinars for
>victims of Hurricane Katrina.  It amounts to more than a year's pay for many
>people there.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Katrina

[Lynn Carpenter]

Sent to me via the origami list: 

http://www.defendamerica.mil/articles/sep2005/a090905ms2.html
> 
>It's a report on Iraqi soldiers who collected up a million dinars for
>victims of Hurricane Katrina.  It amounts to more than a year's pay for many
>people there.

I have nothing to add.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Fw: A THOUGHTFUL HUSBAND & More

[Lynn Weasenforth]

NOTES FROM A THOUGHTFUL HUSBAND

It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes
harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were
younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are
oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.

My name is Ron.   Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife,
Julie.   When I took "early retirement last year, it became necessary for
Julie to get a full-time job, both for extra income and for the health
benefits that we needed.   Shortly after she started working, I noticed she
was beginning to show her age.

I usually get home from the golf course about the same time she gets home from
work.   Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to
rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her.
Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on
the table.   I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating
out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home cooked grub when I hit that
door.

She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating.   But now it's not
unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what
I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they
won't clean themselves.   I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem
to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think.   For example, she will say
that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her
lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and
offer encouragement.   I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three
days. That way she won't have to rush so much.

I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her
any (if you know what I mean).  I like to think tact is one of my strong
points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She
had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not
to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold
glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as
she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Julie. I'm not
saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it
difficult. Some will find it impossible!   Nobody knows better than I do how
frustrating women get as they get older.   However, guys, even if you just use
a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this
article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile.   After all, we
are put on this earth to help each other... Ron


EDITOR'S NOTE:   Ron died suddenly Thursday May 26.   He was found with a
Calloway extra long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II rammed up his backside,

with only 2 inches of grip showing...His wife Julie was arrested, but the
all-woman Grand Jury accepted her defense that he accidentally sat down on it
very suddenly.



Subject: MEAN MOMS

Someday when my children are old enough to understand the logic that motivates
a parent, I will tell them, as my Mean Mom told me: I loved  you enough . . .
to ask where you were going, with whom, and what time you would be home.

I  loved you enough to be silent and let you discover that your new best
friend was a creep.

I loved you enough to make you go pay for the bubble gum you had taken and
tell the clerk, "I stole this yesterday and want to pay for it."

I loved you enough to stand over you for two hours while you cleaned your
room, a job that should have taken me 15 minutes.

I loved you enough to let you see anger, disappointment, and tears in my eyes.
Children must learn that their parents aren't perfect.

I loved you enough to let you assume the responsibility for your actions even
when the penalties were so harsh they almost broke my heart.

But most of all, I loved you enough . . . to say NO when I knew you would hate
me for it.

Those were the most difficult battles of all. I'm glad I won them, because in
the end you won, too. And someday when your children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates parents, you will tell them.

Was your Mom mean? I know mine was. We had the meanest mother in the whole
world!  While other kids ate candy for breakfast, we had to have cereal, eggs,
and toast. When others had a Pepsi and a Twinkie for lunch,  we had to eat
sandwiches. And you can guess our mother fixed us a dinner that was different
from what other kids had, too.

Mother insisted on knowing where we were at all times. You'd think we were
convicts in a prison. She had to know who our friends were, and what  we were
doing with them. She insisted that if we said 

Re: [lace-chat] Katrina - unbelieveable

[Lynn Carpenter]

Put me on that list of people who find the happenings in Louisiana
unbelievable.

I heard a radio interview early on with some man who sounded a complete
lower-level-flunky, "not my job" idiot, only to find out later he was
Michael Brown, head of FEMA!

Oh for the days when Alexis de Tocqueville commented on Americans building
a bridge or clearing a road because they saw what needed to be done and did
it.

Then again, he also had a lot to say about elected politicians being
beholden to the voters, and how they would bend to the passing whim of the
majority.  And how right he was.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] walking, was Re: Tesco

[Lynn Carpenter]

Tamara P Duvall <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>On Sep 9, 2005, at 3:27, Lynne Cumming wrote:
>
>> Luckily we live 10 mins walk away from our nearest Tesco so only the 
>> major
>> shop has to be done by car
>
>Oooh, how I laughed at that one... :) I do recognise the attitude from 
>Europe but, in US, a 10 minute walk (one way, I presume) is 7 minutes 
>too long  Why, do you think, we're locked into the vicious circle of 
>"whale watching"?

When I lived in "the city", I used to walk 10 minutes to the library, with
a lovely bakery right across the street.  It was called "The American
Bakery", and in true melting-pot tradition, was in a neighborhood that had
long been Polish, was turning Hispanic, and was owned and run by an Indian
couple who had bought it, recipes and all, when the original Polish owners
retired.  (That's India-Indian, not Native American, for the PC folk.)
Lovely cream horns they sold there.  Almost always with a police car parked
nearby for their coffee break.  We used to say, "If we really wanted more
police protection, we would open a bakery and sell good donuts."

If I walked for 10 minutes from my house today out in rural Michigan, I
would be by an asparagus field if I went west, soybeans & corn if I walked
east, asparagus and potatoes north, or cucumbers (this year) south.  Not to
mention I'd start walking on a secondary highway used by double-bottom
gravel trucks going about 70 mph on a 55 mph road.

So many places here, not only does the culture lean against walking, it's
downright dangerous.  I usually walk on the looping path we put that goes
to the back of our 10-acre lot.  It's a lot safer than the road, a lot
prettier, and I can usually pick wild strawberries, blackberries,
raspberries, or Concord grapes.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Re: smaller knitting needles

[Lynn Carpenter]

At 03:06 PM 9/2/05 -0400, Heather Bogart wrote:
>
>>I actually recently cheaped out and bought thin wire and sanded down the 
>>ends. Got me 0.75 mm needles (I guess about a 6/0 in US sizes) for next to 
>>nothing with no shipping and a bit of sanding time.

I bought a pair (two in a package) of "Dritz long doll needles" and filed
and sanded the points until they were rounded.  Here's a hint for smoothing
points:  look for a nail buffing kit with two smoothing boards & a buffer.
I've also used the nail smoothing boards to take light corrosion off needles.

Another source of long fine needles is "Havel's sewing".  They sell
"tatting needles", and while they are not so nice at the eye as the Handy
Hands ones, they are fine in pairs for knitting with, after the points have
been rounded off.

I had a heartbreaker yesterday -- found an old package of Bucilla size 19
knitting needles in an antique store labelled "needles (3) $1".
Unfortunately only (1) needle was in the package!  I looked all around on
the floor and in the box of sewing patterns next shelf down looking for the
others. But when I took that one lonely needle to the cash register, since
there was only one, the owner only charged me 35 cents for it.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] smaller knitting needles

[Lynn Carpenter]

susan <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>i don't know why i forgot that lacis is an american company.  i'm sure
>someone brought that up in an email a few days ago.  they are the only
>ones who carry a complete supply of knitting needles in the smaller
>sizes.

I know of several US suppliers of the smaller size (00 to 8-0) knitting
needles besides Lacis.

Here are a few I can remember off the top of my head:
http://www.purseparadise.com/
http://www.baglady.com/
http://www.jklneedles.com/
http://www.mielkesfarm.com/

I'm sure I'll remember another two or three as soon as I press "Send"!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] secret pal

[Lynn Weasenforth]

To my secret pal,

Once again, it was worth the wait.  The past two weeks have been awful, 4 of
my 9 grandkids were in the hospital for spinal meningitis, now lucky me, I
have the symptoms, oh well.  Any way, the lace tools are beautiful and the
thread to die for, had to fight off everybody about the chocolate, the coaster
has a picture of my DH in it, and the bobbin lace sign is so cute.  You amaze
me with your gifts, I am extremely lucky to have you as my secret pal.

 Thank you so much,

Lynn (Melinda)

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[lace-chat] Fw: WOMENS WORLD

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Subject: WOMENS WORLD


WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST

She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.

Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

WOMEN'S REVENGE

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to
purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a
television set in her purse.
"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
"No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I
figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN

(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)

I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,

pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,

and still be afraid of a spider.

MARRIAGE SEMINAR

While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,

Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,

"It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and

dislikes."
He addressed the man, "Can you name your wife's favorite flower?"
Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's

Pillsbury, isn't it?

WIFE VS. HUSBAND A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not
saying a word.

An earlier discussion had led to an argument and

neither of them wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,

the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."

W O R D S

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything
to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"

CREATION A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be

so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.

God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I
would be attracted to you!

WHO DOES WHAT A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew
the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then

we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do
it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible

that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the
top of several pages, that it indeed says.."HEBREWS"

The Silent Treatment A man and his wife were having some problems at home and
were giving

each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business
flight.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a
piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she
would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had
missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't
wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It
is 5:00 AM. Wake up."

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

God may have created man before woman,

but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT
!

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[lace-chat] Wasp story

[Lynn Carpenter]

We certainly have a lot of "bug" stories, don't we?  This is better than
the flame war that sometimes seem to start up in August.  Give me creepy
crawly stories from the safety of the computer room any time!

Nova's wasp story reminded me that I have a wasp story of my own.

A couple of years ago, in the fall, I took in a batch of laundry I had hung
outdoors on the clothesline.  The days were getting shorter and cooler, and
so some of the heavier fabrics, like denim blue jeans, had not quite dried.
 So I put the whole batch into the dryer, thinking that at least they were
partly dry.

The next morning I pulled out a pair of my slacks to wear to work and put
them on.  As I walked to the kitchen I felt that jabbing pain Nova
described -- like having a hot knitting needle spiked into you -- right
where the back of the leg meets the buttock!  YOW!  I dropped those pants
so fast!  And sure enough, a wasp had ridden indoors on the laundry and
survived its tumbling in the dryer.

All I could think of was the fact that for me, wasp bites usually swell,
and then they *itch*.  I would be going to work (minus the wasp!), with an
itchy wasp bite right on my backside!

But strangely, this wasp bite, although it hurt, never started to itch.  I
slowly realized that it must have used up all of its venom stinging the
laundry as it tumbled in the hot dryer!  And I thanked goodness that the
batch hadn't quite dried.  Otherwise it might have been my hand, as I
folded the laundry, that met up with the wasp.

I learned my lesson -- when the wasps start looking for places to hibernate
in the fall, I give up hanging laundry outdoors, even if the day is sunny
and warm.  It's not worth the wasp-roulette!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Re: silkworms

[Lynn Carpenter]

"BrambleLane" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Ricki in Utah writes: I've thought about raising silkworms in my mulberry
>trees, too, until I heard someone explain it's cruelty to animals.
>
>Ricki, I am in my second season of raising silkworms.  I am a handspinner.
>And I intend to use the silk from them.  I would be interested in knowing
>why it is considered cruelty to animals.

I think that must be the point when cocoons for reeling are put in boiling
water, killing the caterpillars before they chew their way out.

Personally I'm not that sentimental about caterpillars.  I've certainly
killed my share of the white cabbage butterfly caterpillars!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Re: Creepy crawlies

[Lynn Carpenter]

"Carol Adkinson" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>I am becoming even more thankful that I live in the UK!   We don't have to
>put up with all these poisonous and unpleasant creepy crawlies and snakes!

Michigan's list of creepy crawlies is pretty short.  There is supposed to
be one poisonous snake that lives in Michigan, the massasauga rattlesnake.
They are very shy and rare, and although I have gone camping many times, I
have never seen one.

We do have various kinds of wasps and hornets.  When I was growing up,
there used to be wild honeybees, and if you had dandelions or clover in
your lawn, once in a while someone would be stung on the ankle or foot.
But these days the varroa mites and trachea mites have killed off most of
the wild honeybees, so you only see them if you are near a beekeeper.

I still find it very strange to stand by a flowering tree in the spring,
and see that the few bees in the blossoms are big bumble bees, and not hear
the flowers buzzing with honey bees.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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Re: [lace-chat] Re: raffle!

[Lynn Scott]

>Thank you so much for the Piecework magazine, it arrived today.  I have a
lot of delicious reading to go through as the new Martha Pullen Vintage
Collection book also arrived, with more lacey things.

Thanks again,
Lynn Scott in Wollongong

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[lace-chat] Fw: If my body was a car

[Lynn Weasenforth]

- Original Message -
From: Danny
To: Danny
Sent: Thursday, August 04, 2005 10:20 PM
Subject: If my body was a car


   If my body was a car, this is the
time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps
and dents and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a little
dull, but that's not the worst of it.

My fenders are too wide to be considered stylish. They were once as sleek as a
little MG; now they look more like an old Buick.

My seat cushions have split open at the seams My seats are sagging. Seat
belts? I gave up all belts when Krispy Cremes opened a shop in my
neighborhood.!

Air bag's ?Forget it. The only bags I have these days are under my eyes. Not
counting the saddlebags, of course.

I have soo many miles on my odometer. Sure, I've been many places and seen
many things, but when's the last time an appraiser factored life experiences
against depreciation?

My headlights are out of focus and it's especially hard to see things up
close.

My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip and slide and skid and
bump into things even in the best of weather.

My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins.

It takes me hours to reach my maximum speed.

My fuel rate burns inefficiently.

But here's the worst of it - almost every time I sneeze, cough or sputter.
either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires!
Danny
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
http://wildgun1.com

Montani Semper Liberi

"Never take life seriously, no one ever gets out alive anyway"
``
It's better to have everyone think you're ignorant,
than to open your mouth and remove all doubt
```
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a
pretty and well preserved body, But, rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly
used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -- "WOW--What a Ride!"
```
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well
dance
```
Dying for freedom isn't the worst that could happen, being Forgotten is!
`
Recipient, Order of The Silver Rose
#505-04
www.silverrose.org

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[lace-chat] Fw: Belive it or not --

[Lynn Weasenforth]

- Original Message -
From: Danny W
To: Danny
Sent: Thursday, August 04, 2005 11:36 PM
Subject: Fw: Belive it or not --



Danny
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
http://wildgun1.com

Montani Semper Liberi

"Never take life seriously, no one ever gets out alive anyway"
``
It's better to have everyone think you're ignorant,
than to open your mouth and remove all doubt
```
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a
pretty and well preserved body, But, rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly
used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -- "WOW--What a Ride!"
```
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well
dance
```
Dying for freedom isn't the worst that could happen, being Forgotten is!
`
Recipient, Order of The Silver Rose
#505-04
www.silverrose.org
Sent: Thursday, August 04, 2005 11:27 PM
Subject: Belive it or not --







The last one is a gem.

LICENSE TO STEAL
Two Kentucky men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain
from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the
front panel off the machine, though, they pulled the bumper off the truck.
They panicked and fled, leaving the chain still attached to the machine, their
bumper still attached to the chain, and their license plate still attached to
the bumper.

IN THE BAG
A "tourist," supposedly on a golf holiday, stood in line at the customs
counter. While making idle chatter, the customs official thought it odd that
the golfer didn't know what a handicap was. The officer then asked the tourist
to demonstrate his swing. He did - backwards. A substantial amount of
narcotics was found in the golf bag.

MADE FOR TV
Guns For Hire, an Arizona company specializing in staged gunfights for Western
movies, got a call from a 47-year-old woman who wanted to have her husband
shot. She was sentenced to four years in jail.

DO YOU ACCEPT CREDIT CARDS?
A Texan convicted of robbery worked out a deal to pay $9600 in damages rather
than serve a two-year prison sentence. For payment, he provided the court a
forged check. He got his prison term back, plus eight more years.

YOU MEAN ME?
A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving revolvers.
The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the startled
first bandit shot him.

DEADHEADS
A man in Orange County Municipal Court had been ticketed for driving alone in
the carpool lane. He claimed that the four frozen cadavers in the mortuary van
he was driving should be counted. The judged ruled that passengers must be
alive to qualify.

THIS WOULD BE ME
The judge called the case of People vs. Steven Lewon Crook. The bailiff opened
the door to the holding cell and called, "Crook, come forward." Five of the
prisoners entered the courtroom.

LEARN YOUR LESSON
When asked for her occupation, a woman charged with a traffic violation said
she was a schoolteacher. The judge rose from the bench. "Madam, I have waited
years for a schoolteacher to appear before this court," he smiled with
delight. "Now sit down at that table and write 'I will not pass through a red
light' five hundred times."

AHH, THAT'S BETTER!
A judge in Louisville decided a jury went "a little bit too far" in
recommending a sentence of 5,005 years for a man who was convicted of five
robberies and a kidnapping. The judge reduced the sentence to 1,001 years.

OOPS! I BLEW THAT ONE!
A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: "My
client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling
articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the
whole individual for an offense committed by his limb."
"Well put," the judge replied. "Using your logic, I sentence the defendant's
arm to one year's imprisonment. He can accompany it or not, as he chooses."
The defendant smiled. With his lawyer's assistance he detached his artificial
limb, laid it on the bench, and walked out.






ROGER H. COOPER
CAVTROOPER5981

http://www.cavalrycountryusa.com
http://cav_trooper0/tripod.com/
http://cav_trooper0/tripod.com/cavalrygroups/

"THE NEXT TIME SOMEONE DEMANDS A TIMETABLE FOR THE WAR IN IRAQ, ASK THEM TO
NAME JUST ONE WAR_---ANYWHERE---THAT HAD SUCH A THING"

'WE CANNOT DEFEND FREEDOM ABROAD BY DESERTING IT AT HOME"

"NO ONE HAS AFINER COMMAND OF LANGUAGE THAN THE PERSON WHO KEEPS HIS MOUTH
SHUT.

THE PAST AND FUTURE
YESTERDAY, TODAY AND TOMORROW


Courage does not always roar. Sometimes, it i

[lace-chat] growing old gracefully

[Lynn Weasenforth]

I wish to extend my apologies to any one that I may have offended, my husband
sent these to me and I just wanted to share.  Again, my sincere apologies.

Lynn

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Re: [lace-chat] Sweet stay-at-homes

[Lynn Scott]

Thanks Ricki for the poem, tis many a long year since I heard his name
mentioned in poetry.  I still remember just a few lines of one of Walter
de la Mare's poems that I learned in 4th grade in Gimli, Manitoba, Canada,
"Slowly, silently, now the moon,...", at least I always thought it was his
writing.

A nice trip down memory lane.

Lynn in Wollongong Australia

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[lace-chat] re: chidren leaving home

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hi everyone,

Just had to put my two cents in.  I do not have the empty nest syndrome, nor
the boomerang effect, I instead have the revolving door syndrome and mamaw can
you watch the kids, every day, don't get me wrong I love them all dearly, but
it's not easy typing on the computer or making lace with a baby in your arms.
I sometimes wonder how when I had my four children that anywhere I went they
all went with me, I keep telling them to stop depending on me so much, cause I
won't be around forever.  Sometime between the 8th and 24th of August we will
have our 10th grandchild, and I will be 50 in August too, sometimes I feel
much older.  

That's it for me,
Lynn
widgun004smate in WV.

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[lace-chat] Fw: House behind the house

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Subject: Fw: House behind the house








-
---




MOST OF US CAN RECALL THIS "HOUSE"!!




One of my bygone recollections, as I recall the days of yore is
the little house, behind the house, with the crescent o'er the door.



'Twas a place to sit and ponder with your head bowed down so low,
knowing that you wouldn't be there, if you didn't have to go.



Ours was a three-holer, with a size for every one. You left there
feeling better after the job was done.



You had to make these frequent trips, whether snow, rain, sleet,
or fog, to the little house where you sat and read the Sears Roebuck catalog.



Oft times in dead of winter the seat was covered with snow. 'Twas
then with much reluctance to the little house you'd go.



With a swish you'd clear the seat, bend low and, with shivers in
mind, you'd blink your eyes and grit your teeth as you sat on your behind.



I recall the day that Granddad, who stayed with us one summer,
made a trip to the shanty which proved to be a hummer.



'Twas the same day my Dad finished painting the kitchen green.
He'd just cleaned up the mess he'd made with rags and gasoline.



He tossed the rags in the shanty hole and went on his usual way,
not knowing that by doing so he would eventually rue the day.



Now Granddad had an urgent call; I never will forget! This trip he
made to the little house lingers in my memory yet.



He sat down on the shanty seat, with both feet on the floor, then
filled his pipe with tobacco and struck a match on the outhouse door.



As he took a long puff on his pipe, he slowly raised his behind,
tossed the flaming match in the open hole, with not a worry on his mind.



The blast that followed, I am sure was heard for miles around; and
there was poor ol' Granddad just sitting on the ground.



The smoldering pipe was still in his mouth, his suspenders he held
tight; the celebrated three-holer was blown clear out of sight.



When we asked him what had happened, his answer I'll never forget.
He thought it must of been something he had et!



Next day we had a new one which my Dad built with ease. With a
sign on the entrance door which read: No Smoking, Please!



Now that's the end of the story, with memories of long ago, of the
little house, behind the house where we went cause we had to go.



~ Author Unknown














-
---

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Checked by AVG Anti-Virus.
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[lace-chat] Fw: Growing OLD GRACEFULLY

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Subject: Growing OLD GRACEFULLY



Growing OLD GRACEFULLY



A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of
water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says,



"I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today.."



The bartender says, "Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink. In
fact, this one is on me."



As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, "I would like to
buy you a drink, too."



The old woman says, "Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of
water."



"Coming up," says the bartender.



As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, "I would like to buy you
one, too."



The old woman says, "Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with two
drops of water."



"Coming right up," the bartender says.



As he gives her the drink, he says, "Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the
Scotch with only two drops of water?"



The old woman replies,



"Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor. Holding
your water, however, is a whole other issue."



"OLD" IS WHEN .. Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you
answer, "Pick one; I can't do both!"



"OLD " IS WHEN ... Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and
you're barefoot.



"OLD" IS WHEN ... A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the
garage door.



"OLD" IS WHEN ... Going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.



"OLD" IS WHEN ... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you
don't have to go along.



"OLD" IS WHEN ... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by
the police.



"OLD" IS WHEN ..."Getting a little action" means you don't need to take any
fiber today


"OLD" IS WHEN ... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.



"OLD" IS WHEN ... An "all nighter" means not getting up to use the bathroom.

AND

"OLD" IS WHEN ... You are not sure these are jokes.

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Re: [lace-chat] Harry Potter - different covers

[Lynn Scott]

We have the children's cover, I think for all the editions, and proud of
it.  Just before the sale of No. 6 they announced that HP had sold 255
million copies, which approximately is 51 million sets of 5 books. 
Judging by this house alone, it has been read by 4 different people, they
there are the library edition, so there is a potential that 200 million
people have read the series - no wonder it is so popular and she is so
rich, as that doesn't even count the audio, movies, and merchandising.

I am have the same problem with the DaVinci Code, can't seem to get into
it.  On the other hand, I am rereading HP in little bits here and there,
DH is reading it first time round in the evenings, and his 92 year old
father asked for it back yesterday so he could reread it - he gets it in
the afternoon until Don comes home.  So in the house it is a hit, except
for the 83 year old MIL, but then she doesn't read anything except the TV
guide and her Bible.

Lynn in the Gong

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[lace-chat] Re: IDIOTS

[Lynn Carpenter]

Tamara P Duvall <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>> This one was from Kingman, KS.
>> And he was a Kansas City  chef!
>> Happened in Birmingham, Ala.
>> probation officer in Wichita, KS
>> This was a brunch at Texas Instruments.
>> A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff's office no less.
>> This was at a dealership in Canton, Mississippi!
>
>I've collected just the locations from the "idiot sightings" that Lynn 
>Weasenforth had sent and can't help but wonder... Do we (here in the 
>South) *really* have all the idiots in the US? Could it be due to 
>gravity, seeing as we're "down South heah"?

Up here in the North, we lose bunches of idiots to things like:

"I'm sure that ice is thick enough to drive my snowmobile (or hey, pick-up
truck!) on!"
"Quit complaining, the road's not that bad!"  (Flying down 131 in a blizzard)
"Aw, come on, the waves aren't that high!"  (Also spelled, Let's go
swimming in a Lake Michigan rip current.)

Mother Nature and winter are tough on idiots.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
[tongue somewhat in cheek]

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[lace-chat] Fw: IDIOTS

[Lynn Weasenforth]

My husband sent these, just wanted to share.

Lynn
wildgun004smate
Clarksburg, WV
Subject: IDIOTS





  IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD:

   I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had  a
   new neighbor call the local township administrative
  office to request the
  > removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The
  reason: "too many deer
  > were being hit by cars" and he didn't want them to
  cross there anymore.
  > This
  > one was from Kingman, KS.
   __
   IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE: My daughter went to a local
  Taco Bell and ordered
  > a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for
  "minimal lettuce." He
  > said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg. And he
  was a Kansas City  chef!
   __
   IDIOT SIGHTING: I was at the airport, checking in at
  the gate when an
  > airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in
  your baggage without
  > your knowledge? To which I replied, "If it was
  without my knowledge, how
  > would I know? He smiled knowingly and nodded,
  "That's why we ask."
  > Happened
  > in Birmingham, Ala.
  ___
   IDIOT SIGHTING: The stoplight on the corner buzzes
  when it's safe to
  >> cross
  > the street. I was crossing with an intellectually
  challenged coworker of
  > mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was
  for. I explained that it
  > signals blind people when the light is red.
  Appalled, she responded, "What
  > on earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a
  probation officer in
  > Wichita, KS
  ___
   IDIOT SIGHTING: At a good-bye luncheon for an old and
  dear coworker who
  > was leaving the company due to "downsizing," our
  manager commented
  > cheerfully, this is fun. We should do this more
  often." Not a word was
  > spoken. We all just looked at each other with that
  deer-in-the-headlights
  > stare. This was a brunch at Texas Instruments.
   
  IDIOT SIGHTING: I work with an individual who plugged
  her power strip
  >> Back
  > into itself and for the life of her couldn't
  understand why her system
  > would
  > not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County
  Sheriff's office no less.
  
   IDIOT SIGHTING: When my husband and I arrived at an
  automobile dealership
  > to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been
  locked in it. We went
  > to
  > the service department and found a mechanic working
  feverishly to unlock
  > the
  > driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger
  side, I instinctively
  > tried the door handle and discovered that it was
  unlocked. "Hey," I
  > announced to the technician, "it's open!" To which
  he replied, "I know - I
  > already got that side." This was at a dealership in
  Canton, Mississippi!
  ___
   *and they walk among us ... and REPRODUCE
  ##

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[lace-chat] Re: Air Conditioning

[Lynn Carpenter]

"Jean Nathan" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>I've only encountered air conditioning in modern shops and ofices. 
>Everywhere else relies on opening doors and windows and portable fans. 
>Portable air conditioning units are available in the big DIY stores, but 
>they're not something we seem to have latched on to.

In the early 1960's this was true in Michigan, too, and this reminds me of
a story:

When my parents were married, they went to Florida on their honeymoon.
They were married in August.

So these two 1960's 20-year-olds drive down to hot, humid, sticky Florida
in August.  They are so hot, they are practically hanging their heads out
the car windows like a dog to catch the breeze.  But they notice that a lot
of the people in the other cars they see are driving around with their car
windows all rolled up!

"Hm," they say to each other, "Maybe they know something we don't!"  And
they roll their car windows up.  After sweating profusely in their
closed-up car for a few minutes, one of them realizes that what all these
native Floridians have in *their* cars, that they don't, is a little thing
called "car air conditioning"!  :D

(In the 1960's in Michigan, air conditioning was relatively rare except in
classy department stores, and *car* air conditioning was even rarer.)

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Fw: ABC's

[Lynn Weasenforth]

  The New ABC's

  A is for Apple, and B is for Boat,
  That used to be right, But now it won't float!
  Age  before beauty is what we once said, But let's be a bit more
realistic
  instead!

  NOW:

  A is for arthritis,

  B is the bad back,

  C is the chest pains, perhaps car-d-iac?

  D is for dental decay and decline,

  E is for eyesight, can't read that top line!

  F is for fissures and fluid  retention,

  G is for gas which I'd rather not mention.

  H is high blood pressure--I'd rather it be low;

  I for incisions with scars you can show.

  J  is for joints, out of socket, won't mend,

  K is for knees that crack when they bend.

  L for libido, what happened to sex?

  M is for memory, I forget what comes next

  N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low;

  O is for osteo, the bones that don't grow!

  P for prescriptions, I have quite a few, Just give me a pill and
 I'll be good as new!

  Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu?

  R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.

  S for sleepless nights, counting my fears,

  T for Tinnitus;  there's bells in my ears!

  U is for urinary; big troubles with flow;

  V is for vertigo, that's "dizzy," you know.

  W is for worry,  NOW what's going 'round?

  X is for X ray, and what might be found.

  Y is another year I'm left here behind,

  Z is for zest that I still have -- in my  mind.

  I've survived all the symptoms, my  body's deployed,
  And  I've kept 26 doctors fully employed!!!

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[lace-chat] Distances, was Large city populations

[Lynn Carpenter]

"Carol Adkinson" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>Despite mathematics being my first love, I am still sometimes fazed by
>distances, and I think it sometimes gets the UK into perspective when you
>realise that, from our coastal side of the country, in East Anglia, to *my*
>part of Wales - St Davids, right on the bit that sticks out into the Irish
>sea, and at the lower end of St Bride's Bay - it is about 400 miles.  And
>that is - apart from the bottom of the country from the south east the south
>west - one of the widest parts of the UK, and can still easily be travelled
>in a day.
>
>And what I find hard to grasp is that the USA is farther from one side to
>the other, than it is from the UK to the USA.   My mind boggles at the
>number of noughts on the mileage!

When we went to the Netherlands, we had to make the opposite adjustment.
We rented a car, and the map we bought was about the size of our Michigan
state road map.  But the scale!  I often navigate when my husband is
driving, so I have a pretty clear mental picture of how far we have to
drive from the distance on the map.

Well, on the Netherlands map, that distance was *much* shorter.  Whiz!
Before I could say to take N141, we had already passed it, and I was
scrambling to figure out what other exit we could take to get back where we
meant to be.

It took me about a day to adjust, and then my mother said, "Well, I should
get used to doing that, too, so I can navigate while your husband visits
his Dutch friends."

Mom had to make the same map-to-distance adjustment, but her established
strategy, from as long as I can remember, when the driver misses an exit,
is to panic and yell, "We passed it!  We should have taken that exit back
there!  You'll have to get off and go back!"

Ouch.  I don't drive very well with people yelling at me, so when I had to
drive, I wrote out the route, line by line, in large black letters, so I
could read it without looking at the map.

Michigan's size -- (the wonders of the internet) -- the lower,
mitten-shaped peninsula is about 277 miles long from north to south, and
195 miles wide from east to west.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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Re: [lace-chat] Re: raffle!

[Lynn Scott]

>What an absolute surprise, thanks so much, I look forward to getting the
magazine, how very gracious of you to do this fine deed.

Lynn Scott, Wollongong

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[lace-chat] Michigan geography quirks, was towel heaters

[Lynn Carpenter]

susan <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>have you ever been to saginaw?  even the water tastes like the lake
>water.  it is very damp there as well. 

I probably have, as my parents took us camping all over the state, upper &
lower peninsula, and my husband also loves to travel.  But I doubt I would
have noticed the taste of the water:  I grew up drinking hard well water
with a very high iron content, and thinking my grama's chlorinated city
water tasted weird!

 i have never lived near a
>swamp.  only the detroit river, and honestly i might have only seen
>that 10 times my whole life in detroit. that is why i thought it was so
>strange here in tennessee where there are creeks every 3 or 4 city
>blocks.  

I don't know about Detroit, but I grew up near Grand Rapids, and once saw a
map of historical GR.  I was surprised at how many creeks showed up on that
map.  All of them had been routed underground decades before I was born.
Even the "rapids" are all completely flattened out by dams, so the river
just looks flat.

michigan is very flat compared to tennessee, so if you are in
>mighigan and in a flood zone, you won't have too many hilltops to move
>to.  i can image out in the surrounding counties it floods all the
>time. i know the roads in the city do.

Yeah, Michigan doesn't have the extremes of elevation Tennessee does, but I
think the west side of the state is less flat than the east side, and the
northern part of the west side (for example, the Traverse Bay area) is even
more "roll-y".  But then Michigan got plowed flat a couple of times by
glaciers, so I guess it has an excuse.  Personally, I live on the top of a
little hill, in a 500-year flood zone.

A couple of maps from my favorite map website, Raven Maps & Images:
http://www.ravenmaps.com/Detail.bok?no=33#  (Michigan)
http://www.ravenmaps.com/Detail.bok?no=49# (Tennessee)

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Fw: pain

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Subject: Fw: pain


 >Pain
>
>A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon
their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would
transfer a portion of the mother's pain to the baby's Father. He asked if they
were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it.
>
>The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters, explaining that even
10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before.
>
>However, as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor
to go ahead and kick it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to
20% pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the
husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing.
>
>At this point, they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel
quite well. Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out the wife
considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to
him. The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her
husband were ecstatic.
>
>When they got home, the mailman was dead on the porch.

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[lace-chat] Fw: The Blonde Year in Review

[Lynn Weasenforth]

DH is at it again, I am glad I am not a blonde, well sometimes from a
bottle

Lynn
Subject: Fw: The Blonde Year in Review



Danny
[EMAIL PROTECTED]<mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
[EMAIL PROTECTED]<mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
http://wildgun1.com<http://wildgun1.com/>

Montani Semper Liberi

"Never take life seriously, no one ever gets out alive anyway"
``
It's better to have everyone think you're ignorant,
than to open your mouth and remove all doubt
```
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a
pretty and well preserved body, But, rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly
used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -- "WOW--What a Ride!"
```
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well
dance
```
Dying for freedom isn't the worst that could happen, being Forgotten is!
`
Recipient, Order of The Silver Rose
#505-04
www.silverrose.org<http://www.silverrose.org/>



Subject: The Blonde Year in Review



  The Blonde Year in Review

  January - Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too
tight.

  February - Couldn't work in a pharmacy because the bottles wouldn't fit
into the typewriter.

  March - Got excited when she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months
because the box said "2-4 years."

  April - Was trapped on an escalator for hours when the power went out.

  May - Couldn't make Kool-Aid because 8 cups of water won't fit into
those little packets.

  June - Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with
a slope.

  July - After losing in a breaststroke swimming competition, complained
to the judges that the other swimmers were using their arms.

  August - Told her blonde friend to hurry when trying to get into their
locked car using a coat hanger because it was starting to rain and the top was
down.

  September - When asked what the capital of California was: answered
"C."

  October - Decided she hates M &M's because they are so hard to peel and
there were too many W's in the bag.

  November - Baked Thanksgiving turkey for 4 days because the instructions
said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 120.

  December - House burned down. Couldn't call 911 because there was no
"11" on any phone button.

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[lace-chat] towel heaters

[Lynn Carpenter]

susan <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>i saw a photo of one [that is, a towel heater] used in a hotel in the u.k.
and i thought that was
>the silliest thing anyone would ever need.  i lived in detroit michigan
>and it didn't make sense why you would need a heater to warm or dry
>your towels.

What a difference the width of the state makes!  I live along the west side
of Michigan, close to "the" lake (Lake Michigan) and I completely
understand why you might need a heater to dry your towels.  Very often in
the spring, summer, & fall, we have such damp air, towels won't dry hanging
outdoors on the line in the sun, let alone hanging indoors in a small
bathroom with no exhaust fan.

Thank goodness for the humidity-reducing power of air conditioning, heated
clothes dryers, and the germ-killing power of Oxiclean and chlorine bleach.
 There is nothing like a damp and stinky dishcloth to make you appreciate
such things.

Then again, in the winter, humidity, what humidity?  At 20 degrees F, doors
that were swollen and sticking are cracking up the middle.

A state of contrasts.  Michigan is a place where you drive to the top of a
tall sand hill covered with dune grasses, and there you find:  a swamp full
of mosquitoes.

And I still wonder why that water doesn't drain down into the sand!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] Fw: HOW TO MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY

[Lynn Weasenforth]

HOW TO MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY

It's not difficult to make a woman happy.

A man only needs to be:

1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich<<<

Re: [lace-chat] Harry Potter

[Lynn Scott]

I started it Saturday evening and skipped church Sunday to finish it. 
Loved it, lots of surprises and a few things that aha moments, a bit of
teenage angst, not as much action, but it certainly leaves us hanging for
the big finale whenever that gets written and published.  Once the 92
years old FIL and the hubbie finish it, I will have my second slower paced
read.

Lynn in the Gong, Australia

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[lace-chat] "Watching America" website

[Lynn Carpenter]

I know news in the US is often so US-centered, we don't get a balanced
picture of what is going on in the world.  Often I have found out about
world events, everything from floods to election results, via my
international email contacts, rather than the news sources.

So here is a website I find interesting:

http://www.watchingamerica.com/

They take news from sources around the world and link to them,
machine-translate them, and in some cases have volunteers translate them to
English.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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Re: [lace-chat] Re: dangers of giving address

[Lynn Scott]

I am not worried about stalkers, etc., but I did google my "maiden" name,
and came up with the lace-chat quiz that I answered when I first signed up
to Arachne, that sort of surprised me.

Lynn Scott in Wollongong, Australia

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[lace-chat] secret pal

[Lynn Weasenforth]

To my secret pal in the UK.  I received your package today and was quite
pleasantly surprised with all you sent.  You are the first ever of my secret
pals to send me thread, it is so beautiful and I already have a project in
mind for it.  DH swiped the key tag and had me put two of our grandkids
pictures in it, now I just need my DD1 to give me a picture of her 11 month
old and then wait a month for my 10th Grandchild to be born.  Anyway, I love
the tea cloth, and the coins I love to use on my spangles, the tissues and pad
of paper will be put to good use, it is already in my purse. 

Thank you so very much for everything,
Lynn (Melinda)

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[lace-chat] wow

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hi all,

I have been working on the cross for my son, Oh my, I have had to add bobbins
where I didn't think that I would, and I am only working on the top of the
cross, I will be nuts when it is done, but it does seem like a good learning
experience, when I am done I will put it on the community webshots, but I
guarantee that it will be quite a while from now, but I will keep on going, I
will not give up.  

That's it for now, but gee there sure should be an easier way.

Bye Bye, Love, Lynn

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[lace-chat] USA eating, lack of exercise

[Lynn Carpenter]

*sigh*

Not only are many neighborhoods "unwalkable", almost everything is set up
with cars and driving in mind.  Mega-stores like Wal-Mart sit in the middle
of *huge* parking lots, but people circle around and around in their cars
like sharks to get a close parking spot, so they won't have to walk to buy
their sugar water and sweet greasy salty food.

My husband has always said he dislikes sweets, so imagine my surprise
(okay, dismay) when we went to the Netherlands and I had to share my
Pavlova with him!  He said, "I don't mind sweet things with flavor, I just
don't like sweet things that have no other taste than sweet!"

It didn't take long, and now my taste is spoiled for sweets that only taste
of sweet.  Imagine, if you make something with real eggs, real butter, real
vanilla, it takes hardly any sugar and only a touch of salt to taste good.

But I'm sweeping against the ocean here in the US!

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com
Does this count as "whale watching" in a state with something like 30%
obesity?
http://www.mlive.com/beachcam/

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RE: [lace-chat] Reese's peanut butter cups

[Lynn Scott]

Yummy, thanks Kim.

Lynn in Wollongong Australia

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[lace-chat] Reese's peanut butter cups

[Lynn Scott]

I haven't found them in Australia either, apparently you can get them in a
store somewhere in Sydney, but it is a 2-3 hr drive from here for me with
the traffic, so I have learned to make my own, melt some chocolate into
one of those make at home chocolate trays, swirl it around, I do one cup
at a time, when cool add peanut butter (I have peanuts ground fresh at the
health food store so I don't get the sugar and salt - but for true
authentic taste get the cheap peanut butter as it has lots of both) then I
pour more melted chocolate on top. Pop the tray in the fridge then consume
at will - not quite the same, but a reasonable substitute.

Lynn Scott Wollongong Australia (formerly Canada), where I am neither rich
nor famous enough for any stalker to care

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[lace-chat] bombings

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Gentle Spiders,

DH has just informed me about something that he saw on the internet, it spoke
of the London bombings, and this past Monday some in Israeli, now he says that
there have been bombs smuggled in from Mexico and in the next 90 days 911 will
look like child's play and that West Virginia is either 5th or 7th highest on
the list.  It seems that Ben Laden (spelling probably wrong) is not through
yet.  It is spooky what goes on through these so called people mind.  France
is another on the list, it seems that everyone who is going through these
terrible times, maybe we are all a threat to Ben Laden, hopefully one
day.well I won't finish my thought, but my thoughts are with the world.
That's it for now, as he tells me more I will tell you.

Thanks, Love, Lynn

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[lace-chat] pillow

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hello Spiders,

Well, I just had to share, I got a big round pillow and it was free.  I made
it myself, I used an old cushion from a cast off couch, cut it round and domed
it.  Then I took my big lazy susan and some material and batting, stapled the
material quite tightly underneath and voila, a large rotating pillow.  All my
pillows are homemade except one which is a honiton pillow from ebay.  My one
and only pillow with hay.  My husband thought it was a waste, but when I
explained that I either made one or bought one, he decided making it was much
better.  Then when the foam breaks up, I will just redo it.  I am so proud of
myself.  Golly it is hard to type with a sleeping 11 month old in your arms.


Lynn

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[lace-chat] Fw: Take Precautions

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Message

Subject: Fw: Take Precautions
Microwaving Water!
(I did not know this, did you?)
A 26-year old man decided to have a cup of coffee. He took a cup of water and
put it in the microwave to heat it up (something that he had done numerous
times before). I am not sure how long he set the timer for, but he wanted to
bring the water to a boil. When the timer shut the oven off, he removed the
cup from the oven. As he looked into the cup, he noted that the water was not
boiling, but suddenly the water in the cup "blew up" into his face. The cup
remained intact until he threw it out of his hand, but all the water had flown
out into his face due to the build up of energy. His whole face is blistered
and he has 1st and 2nd degree burns to his face which may leave scarring.

He also may have lost partial sight in his left eye. While at the hospital,
the doctor who was attending to him stated that this is a fairly common
occurrence and water (alone) should never be heated in a microwave oven. If
water is heated in this manner, something should be placed in the cup to
diffuse the energy such as a wooden stir stick, tea bag, etc., (nothing
metal).

It is however a much safer choice to boil the water in a tea kettle.

General Electric's Response:

Thanks for contacting us, I will be happy to assist you. The e-mail that you
received is correct. Microwaved water and other liquids do not always bubble
when they reach the boiling point. They can actually get superheated and not
bubble at all. The superheated liquid will bubble up out of the cup when it is
moved or when something like a spoon or tea bag is put into it.

To prevent this from happening and causing injury, do not heat any liquid for
more than two minutes per cup. After heating, let the cup stand in the
microwave for thirty seconds! Before moving it or adding anything into it.

Here is what our local science teacher had to say on the matter: "Thanks for
the microwave warning. I have seen this happen before It is caused by a
phenomenon known as super heating. It can occur anytime water is heated and
will particularly occur if the vessel that the water is heated in is new, or
when heating a small amount of water (less than half a cup).

What happens is that the water heats faster than the vapor bubbles can form.
If the cup is very new then it is unlikely to have small surface scratches
inside it that provide a place for the bubbles to form. As the bubbles cannot
form and release some of the heat has built up, the liquid does not boil, and
the liquid continues to heat up well past its boiling point.

What then usually happens is that the liquid is bumped or jarred, which is
just enough of a shock to cause the bubbles to rapidly form and expel the hot
liquid. The rapid formation of bubbles is also why a carbonated beverage spews
when opened after having been shaken."

If you pass this on you could very well save someone from a lot of pain and
suffering.

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[lace-chat] London

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Gentle Spiders,

Just wanted to say that my heart goes out to those in London who have suffered
through the bomb incident.  My thoughts and prayers are with all of them.

Lynn

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[lace-chat] lessons

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Hello all,

Just wanted to put my two cents in, when I first got interested in bobbin
lace, I went through Jan Increte, I had three lessons through her, and only
when I had accomplished the lesson was I allowed to go on.  Then I became a
member of this group, my salvation, without this group I would have been lost.
Here you can ask any questions and will always have an abundance of answers.
I now have the bobbin lace bug bad, but as I don't indulge in to many vices,
well this I can enjoy, however, I can never seem to get enough it is
terribly habit forming, and DH doesn't always share my love of it, but he puts
up with me.

That's it, more than two cents huh.

Lynn
[EMAIL PROTECTED]

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[lace-chat] Re: [lace] Glass Bobbins

[Lynn Weasenforth]

  Subject: [lace] Glass Bobbins


  I recently bought 3 glass bobbins on ebay and should receive them
  sometime this week.  There are some still listed for sale and you can
  see them at:
  http://stores.ebay.co.uk/KEITHS-GLASSCRAFT_W0QQssPageNameZl2QQtZkm

  Hello all,

  I bought 3 of the bobbins on ebay, one was broken, although it was packaged
perfectly, the man sent me another to replace it.  Just a happy customer
treated well.

  Lynn
  wildgun004smate

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Re: [lace-chat] strange lace

[Lynn Carpenter]

Alice Howell <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
>
>I found the strangest lace on eBay.  It is listed as a collar but shown 
>draped over a head form.  There's lots of pictures so it takes a moment to 
>load.  The closeup pictures show that the base fabric of the collar is 
>knotted lace like is used for Filet or Lacis.  The flowers attached are 
>neither needlelace nor bobbin lace.  Anyone seen these before?  This collar 
>looks like it would make a good stage prop.  It would look lacy from a 
>distance yet be sturdy for rough handling.
>
>http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=7330550325

Only in the close-up could I finally make out the netting knots.  But the
applique is completely unfamiliar to me.  It almost looks like something
made of, I don't know, toothpaste or white caulking or some substance like
that.  (I can see it's not, but it's so big and, and, uh, GLOOPY looking!)

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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[lace-chat] secret pal

[Lynn Weasenforth]

Dear Hannah,

It's so nice to finally know who you are, everything that you have sent is
wonderful.  I have really enjoyed this round of secret pals.  Yellow is my
favorite color, the soaps are to beautiful to use. 
I also enjoy cross stitch, needlepoint, knitting, crocheting, macrame,
tatting, bobbin lace (love it), you have really blessed me with so many
bobbins, I guarantee they are all in use on my pillow.  I made it myself, I am
quite proud of it, a rather large roller pillow.  The teas and creamer
certainly get plenty of use.  I use the creamer in coffee, the tea I enjoy
alone.  I really like the coasters, now to get my crew to use them.  I am the
mother of four children The oldest passed away three years ago, he was 27, I
have two girls and a boy left ages, 29, 27, and 25.  I now have 9 and 3/4
grandchildren.  This one coming is a boy so I will have 5 girls and 5 boys.  I
think that will be all because my girls have had there tubes tied, my one son
is gone and the others wife is getting her tubes tide after this one is born.
Ten is plenty, I have a hard enough time trying to remember birthdays.  The
oldest is 10, then 7, 7, 6, 5, 5, 4, 2 and 10 months.  I babysit a lot. Hee
Hee.

Well that is pretty much my life story, can't wait to check out the tatting
book, I taught myself how to do it but  have never made anything cause it
seemed so slow, but in August I will be 50, so I guess with age comes
patience.  My oldest  daughter says that she is quite proud of me, because she
says I usually give up on things.  I know when I started I got the dreaded
horror kit and it sat in my closet for something like 3 years
boy I sure wasted a lot of time, now that I am learning I can't get enough.
Ok that's it for my book.

bye, bye, Lynn

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Re: [lace-chat] The sad demise of Miss Moore's machine - long

[Lynn Scott]

>There is a CSM site, would you be agreeable to sharing it.  My inlaws
happen to have aquired one of those machines.  My FIL would love to use
it to make 100% cotton socks, however, there are no instructions.  At the
moment his wife makes socks up as fairly flat pieces on the knitting
machine and then sews them together, not exactly a great compromise.

Lynn
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[lace-chat] Fw: Old Farmers' Advice

[Lynn Weasenforth]

My husband sent this to me, hope you all enjoy it.

Lynn
[EMAIL PROTECTED]<mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Clarksburg, WV. 26301
Subject: Old Farmers' Advice


Old Farmers' Advice
* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight
and bull-strong.




* Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a
distance.

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a
John Deere tractor.

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

* Do not co rner something that you know is meaner
than you.

* It don't take a very big person to carry a
grudge.

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.

* Every path has a few puddles.

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

* The best sermons are lived, not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't
never gonna happen anyway.

* Don't judge folks by their relatives.

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best
answer.

* Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get
older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't
botherin' you none.

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a
rain dance.

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever
have to deal with, watches
you from the mirror every mornin'.

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a
lotta that comes from bad judgment.

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot
easier than puttin' it back in.

* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some
influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(



New Word Meanings

  Arbitrator: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's.


  Avoidable: What a bullfighter tries to do.

  Bernadette: The act of torching a mortgage.

  Burglarize: What a crook sees with.

  Control: A short, ugly inmate.


  Counterfeiters: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.


  Eclipse: What an English barber does for a living.


  Eyedropper: A clumsy ophthalmologist.


  Heroes: What a guy in a boat does.

  Left Bank: What the robber did when his bag was full of loot.


  Misty: How golfers create divots.


  Paradox: Two physicians.

  Parasites: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.

  Pharmacist: a helper on the farm.

  Polarize: What penguins see with.

  Primate: Removing your spouse from in front of the TV. [Sorry guys!]

  Relief: What trees do in the spring.

  Rubberneck: What you do to relax your wife.

  Seamstress: Describes 250 pounds in a size 6.


  Selfish: What the owner of a seafood store does.


  Sudafed: brought litigation against a government official.


  And last but not least (a real "Good One"):
  Subdued: ...like a guy, like works on one of those attack submarines.

#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(
You know the world is different when the best rapper is a white guy, the best
golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold
the America's Cup, France is accusing the US of arrogance, Germany doesn't
want to go to war, and the 3 most powerful men in America are named 'Bush',
'Dick', and 'Colon'!" and the leader of Australia is flanked by Abbott and
Costello!!!
#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#


Falling Out Of Bed!

A man and his wife check into a hotel. The husband wants to have a drink
at the bar, but his wife is extremely tired so she decides to go on up to
their room to rest.

She lies down on the bed... just then, and elevated train passes by very
close to the window and shakes the room so hard she's thrown out of the
bed.

Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down once more. Again a
train shakes the room so violently, she's pitched to the floor.

Exasperated, she calls the front desk, asks for the manager. The manager
says he'll be right up.

The manager is skeptical but the wife insists the story is true. "Look...
lie here on the bed -- you'll be thrown right to the floor!" So he lies
down next to the wife.

Just then the husband walks in. "What," he says, "are you doing here!?!"

The manager calmly replies, "Would you believe I'm waiting for a train?"

#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#(#

About those REDNECKS...

We have enjoyed the redneck jokes for years. It's  time to take a
reflective look at the core beliefs of a  culture that values home, family,
country and God.  If I had to stand  before a dozen terrorists who
threaten my life, I'd choose a half dozen or  so rednecks to back me up.
Tire irons, squirrel guns and  grit -- that's what rednecks are made of.
I hop

[lace-chat] Re: Dealing with pet "accident" on car seat

[Lynn Carpenter]

"Ann McClean" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
>
>We lost our faithful collie, Smudge, on Thursday - she was 14 and had 
>lost the use of her back legs, etc.   Despite extra covers over the car 
>back seat to take her to the vets, she had an accident & it soaked through.
>
>So what is the best way of cleaning and deodourising the seat?  
>The cover is fixed so I cannot remove it.   Have already sponged it with 
>water and disinfectant, but need to do more.

It is so difficult to lose pets.  Five years later, I still miss my little
lap-sitting Sky.

Since you are in Wales, I don't know if you will be able to find this exact
brand, but I have had good results using a product called "Nature's
Miracle".  My vet sells it, and I have also seen it at large pet-supply
stores.

The products that seem to work best are either biological (containing some
sort of bacteria that breaks down the odorous material) or enzymatic.

Lynn Carpenter in SW Michigan, USA
alwen at i2k dot com

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