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Request for mods to clamp down on unrelated bullshit; there's often little enough activity on here before having to wade through whatever current dumpster-fire is going on. Thanks
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
Don't blame Denise. I overreacted to something that really had nothing to do with me. Again, I apologize to everyone on the list for blowing it way out of proportion. On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 7:35 PM Joe Marougi wrote: > Congrats Denise! > > You singlehandedly ruined this whole fucking group with your arrogant and > abrasive bullshit. > > All that education and you truly SUCK at communicating. Miserable > pathetic person. > > > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 7:12 PM Robert Suárez > wrote: > >> S A M E ! >> >> >> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020, 7:09 PM Monica Lesher >> wrote: >> >>> SAM >>> >>> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020, 22:08 Lerato Khathi < >>> booki...@uzuriartistbookingsandmanagement.com> wrote: >>> somebdy pls help me unsubscribe from this group . i'd forgotten how to do it . pls need to get out of here asap . On Sun, 23 Feb 2020 at 10:47, Mister Jones wrote: > Yes, I know what gaslighting is and that's clearly not what's going on > here. > > I'll quit with this whole topic. I saw what was written and it set me > off. My apologies to you, Denise, for responding the way I did and to the > list for even engaging in it. > > Been listening to a bunch of Boiler Room sets lately. Kenny Larkin, > Octave One, and the like. > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:30 PM Denise Dalphond < > denisedalph...@gmail.com> wrote: > >> Ever heard of gaslighting? You’re free to join the #MeToo movement. I >> don’t care about yr background. And I don’t care about yr feelings. I >> like >> techno music, though. A lot. I heard a techno song on Ann Arbor radio >> just >> the other day. >> >> Denise >> >> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 6:24 PM Mister Jones < >> misterjones...@gmail.com> wrote: >> >>> True, you did say that, but you said much more and it's the rest of >>> what you wrote that I take issue with. Men and boys would likely talk >>> more >>> if we received the same encouragement and support women did, but we >>> don't... At all. We're made fun of when we speak on what's happened. Our >>> harassment claims are never taken seriously when it's a woman we're >>> complaining about. A man filing a report against a female rapist is >>> likely >>> to be laughed out of the station (this isn't speculation, it's >>> documented >>> to have happened). So we keep it to ourselves and tough it out because, >>> like male victims of domestic abuse, there's zero support for us. >>> >>> Is it really brave when you have the support of a whole community >>> standing behind you to come forward? Or is it brave when you stand up >>> and >>> do it completely alone? >>> >>> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 2:52 PM Denise Dalphond < >>> denisedalph...@gmail.com> wrote: >>> I said most children have been molested by at least one family member. Gender neutral. I’m well aware that females molest and abuse people. Men should talk about it more. But it’s scary. Which leads me to remember how brave women are. Because we talk about that stuff. On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:15 PM Mister Jones < misterjones...@gmail.com> wrote: > So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range > of issues and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a > child, not by a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served > under > for three years as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female > and one > male classmate, and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in > my > neighborhood in Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life > (I'm > just a few years short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has > destroyed > my marriage, wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble > with > the law, and brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll > likely > have to pack up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids, > where I'll end up living with my mother and stepfather... At this age. > > Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in > one form or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly > of > you... But these days every time I see a woman talking about rape > this and > that, as if it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys > like > myself are told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. > Women in general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's > a male > victim of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! > Teach > boys not to rape!!!" when
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
Congrats Denise! You singlehandedly ruined this whole fucking group with your arrogant and abrasive bullshit. All that education and you truly SUCK at communicating. Miserable pathetic person. On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 7:12 PM Robert Suárez wrote: > S A M E ! > > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020, 7:09 PM Monica Lesher > wrote: > >> SAM >> >> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020, 22:08 Lerato Khathi < >> booki...@uzuriartistbookingsandmanagement.com> wrote: >> >>> somebdy pls help me unsubscribe from this group . >>> i'd forgotten how to do it . >>> pls need to get out of here asap . >>> >>> On Sun, 23 Feb 2020 at 10:47, Mister Jones >>> wrote: >>> Yes, I know what gaslighting is and that's clearly not what's going on here. I'll quit with this whole topic. I saw what was written and it set me off. My apologies to you, Denise, for responding the way I did and to the list for even engaging in it. Been listening to a bunch of Boiler Room sets lately. Kenny Larkin, Octave One, and the like. On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:30 PM Denise Dalphond < denisedalph...@gmail.com> wrote: > Ever heard of gaslighting? You’re free to join the #MeToo movement. I > don’t care about yr background. And I don’t care about yr feelings. I like > techno music, though. A lot. I heard a techno song on Ann Arbor radio just > the other day. > > Denise > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 6:24 PM Mister Jones > wrote: > >> True, you did say that, but you said much more and it's the rest of >> what you wrote that I take issue with. Men and boys would likely talk >> more >> if we received the same encouragement and support women did, but we >> don't... At all. We're made fun of when we speak on what's happened. Our >> harassment claims are never taken seriously when it's a woman we're >> complaining about. A man filing a report against a female rapist is >> likely >> to be laughed out of the station (this isn't speculation, it's documented >> to have happened). So we keep it to ourselves and tough it out because, >> like male victims of domestic abuse, there's zero support for us. >> >> Is it really brave when you have the support of a whole community >> standing behind you to come forward? Or is it brave when you stand up and >> do it completely alone? >> >> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 2:52 PM Denise Dalphond < >> denisedalph...@gmail.com> wrote: >> >>> I said most children have been molested by at least one family >>> member. Gender neutral. I’m well aware that females molest and abuse >>> people. >>> >>> Men should talk about it more. But it’s scary. Which leads me to >>> remember how brave women are. Because we talk about that stuff. >>> >>> >>> >>> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:15 PM Mister Jones < >>> misterjones...@gmail.com> wrote: >>> So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range of issues and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a child, not by a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served under for three years as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female and one male classmate, and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in my neighborhood in Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life (I'm just a few years short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has destroyed my marriage, wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble with the law, and brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll likely have to pack up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids, where I'll end up living with my mother and stepfather... At this age. Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in one form or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly of you... But these days every time I see a woman talking about rape this and that, as if it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys like myself are told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. Women in general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's a male victim of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! Teach boys not to rape!!!" when it's a female victim of a male. We're told that we should be happy that such things have happened to us when a girl or grown woman comes at us like that and that if it's a boy your age, well... "you should have just kicked his ass". I've had to sit in silence for decades, telling no one about it until it basically destroyed my life. My mother was
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
S A M E ! On Sat, Feb 22, 2020, 7:09 PM Monica Lesher wrote: > SAM > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020, 22:08 Lerato Khathi < > booki...@uzuriartistbookingsandmanagement.com> wrote: > >> somebdy pls help me unsubscribe from this group . >> i'd forgotten how to do it . >> pls need to get out of here asap . >> >> On Sun, 23 Feb 2020 at 10:47, Mister Jones >> wrote: >> >>> Yes, I know what gaslighting is and that's clearly not what's going on >>> here. >>> >>> I'll quit with this whole topic. I saw what was written and it set me >>> off. My apologies to you, Denise, for responding the way I did and to the >>> list for even engaging in it. >>> >>> Been listening to a bunch of Boiler Room sets lately. Kenny Larkin, >>> Octave One, and the like. >>> >>> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:30 PM Denise Dalphond < >>> denisedalph...@gmail.com> wrote: >>> Ever heard of gaslighting? You’re free to join the #MeToo movement. I don’t care about yr background. And I don’t care about yr feelings. I like techno music, though. A lot. I heard a techno song on Ann Arbor radio just the other day. Denise On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 6:24 PM Mister Jones wrote: > True, you did say that, but you said much more and it's the rest of > what you wrote that I take issue with. Men and boys would likely talk more > if we received the same encouragement and support women did, but we > don't... At all. We're made fun of when we speak on what's happened. Our > harassment claims are never taken seriously when it's a woman we're > complaining about. A man filing a report against a female rapist is likely > to be laughed out of the station (this isn't speculation, it's documented > to have happened). So we keep it to ourselves and tough it out because, > like male victims of domestic abuse, there's zero support for us. > > Is it really brave when you have the support of a whole community > standing behind you to come forward? Or is it brave when you stand up and > do it completely alone? > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 2:52 PM Denise Dalphond < > denisedalph...@gmail.com> wrote: > >> I said most children have been molested by at least one family >> member. Gender neutral. I’m well aware that females molest and abuse >> people. >> >> Men should talk about it more. But it’s scary. Which leads me to >> remember how brave women are. Because we talk about that stuff. >> >> >> >> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:15 PM Mister Jones < >> misterjones...@gmail.com> wrote: >> >>> So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range of >>> issues and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a >>> child, >>> not by a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served under for >>> three >>> years as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female and one male >>> classmate, and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in my >>> neighborhood in Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life >>> (I'm >>> just a few years short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has >>> destroyed >>> my marriage, wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble >>> with >>> the law, and brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll >>> likely >>> have to pack up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids, >>> where I'll end up living with my mother and stepfather... At this age. >>> >>> Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in one >>> form or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly of >>> you... >>> But these days every time I see a woman talking about rape this and >>> that, >>> as if it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys like >>> myself >>> are told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. Women in >>> general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's a male >>> victim >>> of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! Teach boys >>> not to rape!!!" when it's a female victim of a male. We're told that we >>> should be happy that such things have happened to us when a girl or >>> grown >>> woman comes at us like that and that if it's a boy your age, well... >>> "you >>> should have just kicked his ass". I've had to sit in silence for >>> decades, >>> telling no one about it until it basically destroyed my life. My mother >>> was >>> devastated when I finally told her, my sisters were in shock especially >>> since one of the older girls was from a family extremely close to us >>> (their >>> mother is godmother to two of my younger sisters), my wife was pissed >>> because I never told her and she had often said I occasionally acted >>> like >>> someone that had been molested;
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
SAM On Sat, Feb 22, 2020, 22:08 Lerato Khathi < booki...@uzuriartistbookingsandmanagement.com> wrote: > somebdy pls help me unsubscribe from this group . > i'd forgotten how to do it . > pls need to get out of here asap . > > On Sun, 23 Feb 2020 at 10:47, Mister Jones > wrote: > >> Yes, I know what gaslighting is and that's clearly not what's going on >> here. >> >> I'll quit with this whole topic. I saw what was written and it set me >> off. My apologies to you, Denise, for responding the way I did and to the >> list for even engaging in it. >> >> Been listening to a bunch of Boiler Room sets lately. Kenny Larkin, >> Octave One, and the like. >> >> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:30 PM Denise Dalphond >> wrote: >> >>> Ever heard of gaslighting? You’re free to join the #MeToo movement. I >>> don’t care about yr background. And I don’t care about yr feelings. I like >>> techno music, though. A lot. I heard a techno song on Ann Arbor radio just >>> the other day. >>> >>> Denise >>> >>> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 6:24 PM Mister Jones >>> wrote: >>> True, you did say that, but you said much more and it's the rest of what you wrote that I take issue with. Men and boys would likely talk more if we received the same encouragement and support women did, but we don't... At all. We're made fun of when we speak on what's happened. Our harassment claims are never taken seriously when it's a woman we're complaining about. A man filing a report against a female rapist is likely to be laughed out of the station (this isn't speculation, it's documented to have happened). So we keep it to ourselves and tough it out because, like male victims of domestic abuse, there's zero support for us. Is it really brave when you have the support of a whole community standing behind you to come forward? Or is it brave when you stand up and do it completely alone? On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 2:52 PM Denise Dalphond < denisedalph...@gmail.com> wrote: > I said most children have been molested by at least one family member. > Gender neutral. I’m well aware that females molest and abuse people. > > Men should talk about it more. But it’s scary. Which leads me to > remember how brave women are. Because we talk about that stuff. > > > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:15 PM Mister Jones > wrote: > >> So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range of >> issues and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a >> child, >> not by a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served under for >> three >> years as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female and one male >> classmate, and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in my >> neighborhood in Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life >> (I'm >> just a few years short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has >> destroyed >> my marriage, wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble with >> the law, and brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll >> likely >> have to pack up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids, >> where I'll end up living with my mother and stepfather... At this age. >> >> Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in one >> form or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly of >> you... >> But these days every time I see a woman talking about rape this and that, >> as if it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys like >> myself >> are told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. Women in >> general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's a male victim >> of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! Teach boys >> not to rape!!!" when it's a female victim of a male. We're told that we >> should be happy that such things have happened to us when a girl or grown >> woman comes at us like that and that if it's a boy your age, well... "you >> should have just kicked his ass". I've had to sit in silence for decades, >> telling no one about it until it basically destroyed my life. My mother >> was >> devastated when I finally told her, my sisters were in shock especially >> since one of the older girls was from a family extremely close to us >> (their >> mother is godmother to two of my younger sisters), my wife was pissed >> because I never told her and she had often said I occasionally acted like >> someone that had been molested; something I always denied. Everyone asked >> "why didn't you ever say something?" not realizing that when you're only >> 7 >> years old you really don't know how to process something like this, and >> in >> a society back then in the late 70's where this kind of stuff was
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
somebdy pls help me unsubscribe from this group . i'd forgotten how to do it . pls need to get out of here asap . On Sun, 23 Feb 2020 at 10:47, Mister Jones wrote: > Yes, I know what gaslighting is and that's clearly not what's going on > here. > > I'll quit with this whole topic. I saw what was written and it set me off. > My apologies to you, Denise, for responding the way I did and to the list > for even engaging in it. > > Been listening to a bunch of Boiler Room sets lately. Kenny Larkin, Octave > One, and the like. > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:30 PM Denise Dalphond > wrote: > >> Ever heard of gaslighting? You’re free to join the #MeToo movement. I >> don’t care about yr background. And I don’t care about yr feelings. I like >> techno music, though. A lot. I heard a techno song on Ann Arbor radio just >> the other day. >> >> Denise >> >> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 6:24 PM Mister Jones >> wrote: >> >>> True, you did say that, but you said much more and it's the rest of what >>> you wrote that I take issue with. Men and boys would likely talk more if we >>> received the same encouragement and support women did, but we don't... At >>> all. We're made fun of when we speak on what's happened. Our harassment >>> claims are never taken seriously when it's a woman we're complaining about. >>> A man filing a report against a female rapist is likely to be laughed out >>> of the station (this isn't speculation, it's documented to have happened). >>> So we keep it to ourselves and tough it out because, like male victims of >>> domestic abuse, there's zero support for us. >>> >>> Is it really brave when you have the support of a whole community >>> standing behind you to come forward? Or is it brave when you stand up and >>> do it completely alone? >>> >>> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 2:52 PM Denise Dalphond < >>> denisedalph...@gmail.com> wrote: >>> I said most children have been molested by at least one family member. Gender neutral. I’m well aware that females molest and abuse people. Men should talk about it more. But it’s scary. Which leads me to remember how brave women are. Because we talk about that stuff. On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:15 PM Mister Jones wrote: > So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range of > issues and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a child, > not by a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served under for > three > years as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female and one male > classmate, and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in my > neighborhood in Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life (I'm > just a few years short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has destroyed > my marriage, wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble with > the law, and brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll > likely > have to pack up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids, > where I'll end up living with my mother and stepfather... At this age. > > Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in one > form or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly of you... > But these days every time I see a woman talking about rape this and that, > as if it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys like myself > are told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. Women in > general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's a male victim > of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! Teach boys > not to rape!!!" when it's a female victim of a male. We're told that we > should be happy that such things have happened to us when a girl or grown > woman comes at us like that and that if it's a boy your age, well... "you > should have just kicked his ass". I've had to sit in silence for decades, > telling no one about it until it basically destroyed my life. My mother > was > devastated when I finally told her, my sisters were in shock especially > since one of the older girls was from a family extremely close to us > (their > mother is godmother to two of my younger sisters), my wife was pissed > because I never told her and she had often said I occasionally acted like > someone that had been molested; something I always denied. Everyone asked > "why didn't you ever say something?" not realizing that when you're only 7 > years old you really don't know how to process something like this, and in > a society back then in the late 70's where this kind of stuff was viewed > as > "coming of age" or "just a part of growing up" what was I really supposed > to say? > > Denise, to answer your question I'll ask another: What happens when > you're a woman and sexually assault or harass a boy or a man?
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
Yes, I know what gaslighting is and that's clearly not what's going on here. I'll quit with this whole topic. I saw what was written and it set me off. My apologies to you, Denise, for responding the way I did and to the list for even engaging in it. Been listening to a bunch of Boiler Room sets lately. Kenny Larkin, Octave One, and the like. On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:30 PM Denise Dalphond wrote: > Ever heard of gaslighting? You’re free to join the #MeToo movement. I > don’t care about yr background. And I don’t care about yr feelings. I like > techno music, though. A lot. I heard a techno song on Ann Arbor radio just > the other day. > > Denise > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 6:24 PM Mister Jones > wrote: > >> True, you did say that, but you said much more and it's the rest of what >> you wrote that I take issue with. Men and boys would likely talk more if we >> received the same encouragement and support women did, but we don't... At >> all. We're made fun of when we speak on what's happened. Our harassment >> claims are never taken seriously when it's a woman we're complaining about. >> A man filing a report against a female rapist is likely to be laughed out >> of the station (this isn't speculation, it's documented to have happened). >> So we keep it to ourselves and tough it out because, like male victims of >> domestic abuse, there's zero support for us. >> >> Is it really brave when you have the support of a whole community >> standing behind you to come forward? Or is it brave when you stand up and >> do it completely alone? >> >> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 2:52 PM Denise Dalphond >> wrote: >> >>> I said most children have been molested by at least one family member. >>> Gender neutral. I’m well aware that females molest and abuse people. >>> >>> Men should talk about it more. But it’s scary. Which leads me to >>> remember how brave women are. Because we talk about that stuff. >>> >>> >>> >>> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:15 PM Mister Jones >>> wrote: >>> So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range of issues and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a child, not by a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served under for three years as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female and one male classmate, and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in my neighborhood in Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life (I'm just a few years short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has destroyed my marriage, wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble with the law, and brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll likely have to pack up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids, where I'll end up living with my mother and stepfather... At this age. Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in one form or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly of you... But these days every time I see a woman talking about rape this and that, as if it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys like myself are told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. Women in general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's a male victim of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! Teach boys not to rape!!!" when it's a female victim of a male. We're told that we should be happy that such things have happened to us when a girl or grown woman comes at us like that and that if it's a boy your age, well... "you should have just kicked his ass". I've had to sit in silence for decades, telling no one about it until it basically destroyed my life. My mother was devastated when I finally told her, my sisters were in shock especially since one of the older girls was from a family extremely close to us (their mother is godmother to two of my younger sisters), my wife was pissed because I never told her and she had often said I occasionally acted like someone that had been molested; something I always denied. Everyone asked "why didn't you ever say something?" not realizing that when you're only 7 years old you really don't know how to process something like this, and in a society back then in the late 70's where this kind of stuff was viewed as "coming of age" or "just a part of growing up" what was I really supposed to say? Denise, to answer your question I'll ask another: What happens when you're a woman and sexually assault or harass a boy or a man? I'll answer it for you: Usually nothing. The world continues to turn. Maybe it makes the news if you're a celebrity, law maker, or some other type of high profile person but you don't worry; it blows over within a few days because nobody cares. You'll continue to get attached to movies as a
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
Ever heard of gaslighting? You’re free to join the #MeToo movement. I don’t care about yr background. And I don’t care about yr feelings. I like techno music, though. A lot. I heard a techno song on Ann Arbor radio just the other day. Denise On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 6:24 PM Mister Jones wrote: > True, you did say that, but you said much more and it's the rest of what > you wrote that I take issue with. Men and boys would likely talk more if we > received the same encouragement and support women did, but we don't... At > all. We're made fun of when we speak on what's happened. Our harassment > claims are never taken seriously when it's a woman we're complaining about. > A man filing a report against a female rapist is likely to be laughed out > of the station (this isn't speculation, it's documented to have happened). > So we keep it to ourselves and tough it out because, like male victims of > domestic abuse, there's zero support for us. > > Is it really brave when you have the support of a whole community standing > behind you to come forward? Or is it brave when you stand up and do it > completely alone? > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 2:52 PM Denise Dalphond > wrote: > >> I said most children have been molested by at least one family member. >> Gender neutral. I’m well aware that females molest and abuse people. >> >> Men should talk about it more. But it’s scary. Which leads me to remember >> how brave women are. Because we talk about that stuff. >> >> >> >> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:15 PM Mister Jones >> wrote: >> >>> So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range of >>> issues and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a child, >>> not by a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served under for three >>> years as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female and one male >>> classmate, and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in my >>> neighborhood in Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life (I'm >>> just a few years short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has destroyed >>> my marriage, wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble with >>> the law, and brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll likely >>> have to pack up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids, >>> where I'll end up living with my mother and stepfather... At this age. >>> >>> Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in one >>> form or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly of you... >>> But these days every time I see a woman talking about rape this and that, >>> as if it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys like myself >>> are told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. Women in >>> general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's a male victim >>> of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! Teach boys >>> not to rape!!!" when it's a female victim of a male. We're told that we >>> should be happy that such things have happened to us when a girl or grown >>> woman comes at us like that and that if it's a boy your age, well... "you >>> should have just kicked his ass". I've had to sit in silence for decades, >>> telling no one about it until it basically destroyed my life. My mother was >>> devastated when I finally told her, my sisters were in shock especially >>> since one of the older girls was from a family extremely close to us (their >>> mother is godmother to two of my younger sisters), my wife was pissed >>> because I never told her and she had often said I occasionally acted like >>> someone that had been molested; something I always denied. Everyone asked >>> "why didn't you ever say something?" not realizing that when you're only 7 >>> years old you really don't know how to process something like this, and in >>> a society back then in the late 70's where this kind of stuff was viewed as >>> "coming of age" or "just a part of growing up" what was I really supposed >>> to say? >>> >>> Denise, to answer your question I'll ask another: What happens when >>> you're a woman and sexually assault or harass a boy or a man? >>> >>> I'll answer it for you: Usually nothing. >>> >>> The world continues to turn. Maybe it makes the news if you're a >>> celebrity, law maker, or some other type of high profile person but you >>> don't worry; it blows over within a few days because nobody cares. You'll >>> continue to get attached to movies as a director and actor (just don't >>> forget to send your victim his hush money first). You'll probably keep your >>> seat in congress or your position as CEO but even if you do step down >>> nobody looks upon you as a lecherous sexual deviant; somehow you're viewed >>> as the victim. If you're a well known professor you might get suspended but >>> you go back to work when it blows over. If you're one of the few that do >>> get arrested, you get a slap on the wrist and very rarely ever have to
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
True, you did say that, but you said much more and it's the rest of what you wrote that I take issue with. Men and boys would likely talk more if we received the same encouragement and support women did, but we don't... At all. We're made fun of when we speak on what's happened. Our harassment claims are never taken seriously when it's a woman we're complaining about. A man filing a report against a female rapist is likely to be laughed out of the station (this isn't speculation, it's documented to have happened). So we keep it to ourselves and tough it out because, like male victims of domestic abuse, there's zero support for us. Is it really brave when you have the support of a whole community standing behind you to come forward? Or is it brave when you stand up and do it completely alone? On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 2:52 PM Denise Dalphond wrote: > I said most children have been molested by at least one family member. > Gender neutral. I’m well aware that females molest and abuse people. > > Men should talk about it more. But it’s scary. Which leads me to remember > how brave women are. Because we talk about that stuff. > > > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:15 PM Mister Jones > wrote: > >> So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range of >> issues and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a child, >> not by a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served under for three >> years as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female and one male >> classmate, and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in my >> neighborhood in Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life (I'm >> just a few years short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has destroyed >> my marriage, wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble with >> the law, and brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll likely >> have to pack up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids, >> where I'll end up living with my mother and stepfather... At this age. >> >> Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in one form >> or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly of you... But >> these days every time I see a woman talking about rape this and that, as if >> it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys like myself are >> told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. Women in >> general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's a male victim >> of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! Teach boys >> not to rape!!!" when it's a female victim of a male. We're told that we >> should be happy that such things have happened to us when a girl or grown >> woman comes at us like that and that if it's a boy your age, well... "you >> should have just kicked his ass". I've had to sit in silence for decades, >> telling no one about it until it basically destroyed my life. My mother was >> devastated when I finally told her, my sisters were in shock especially >> since one of the older girls was from a family extremely close to us (their >> mother is godmother to two of my younger sisters), my wife was pissed >> because I never told her and she had often said I occasionally acted like >> someone that had been molested; something I always denied. Everyone asked >> "why didn't you ever say something?" not realizing that when you're only 7 >> years old you really don't know how to process something like this, and in >> a society back then in the late 70's where this kind of stuff was viewed as >> "coming of age" or "just a part of growing up" what was I really supposed >> to say? >> >> Denise, to answer your question I'll ask another: What happens when >> you're a woman and sexually assault or harass a boy or a man? >> >> I'll answer it for you: Usually nothing. >> >> The world continues to turn. Maybe it makes the news if you're a >> celebrity, law maker, or some other type of high profile person but you >> don't worry; it blows over within a few days because nobody cares. You'll >> continue to get attached to movies as a director and actor (just don't >> forget to send your victim his hush money first). You'll probably keep your >> seat in congress or your position as CEO but even if you do step down >> nobody looks upon you as a lecherous sexual deviant; somehow you're viewed >> as the victim. If you're a well known professor you might get suspended but >> you go back to work when it blows over. If you're one of the few that do >> get arrested, you get a slap on the wrist and very rarely ever have to >> register as a sex offender. >> >> While I get where the sarcasm comes from, Denise, I just want you to >> understand that there are victims of this kind of thing that aren't female >> and perps that are female. Guys like me... we're out here, we just rarely >> ever talk about it. Typically we're too busy sucking it up to complain. >> >> Sorry about the rant y'all. >> >> On Sat, Feb 22,
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
I said most children have been molested by at least one family member. Gender neutral. I’m well aware that females molest and abuse people. Men should talk about it more. But it’s scary. Which leads me to remember how brave women are. Because we talk about that stuff. On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 3:15 PM Mister Jones wrote: > So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range of issues > and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a child, not by > a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served under for three years > as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female and one male classmate, > and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in my neighborhood in > Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life (I'm just a few years > short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has destroyed my marriage, > wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble with the law, and > brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll likely have to pack > up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids, where I'll end up > living with my mother and stepfather... At this age. > > Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in one form > or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly of you... But > these days every time I see a woman talking about rape this and that, as if > it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys like myself are > told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. Women in > general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's a male victim > of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! Teach boys > not to rape!!!" when it's a female victim of a male. We're told that we > should be happy that such things have happened to us when a girl or grown > woman comes at us like that and that if it's a boy your age, well... "you > should have just kicked his ass". I've had to sit in silence for decades, > telling no one about it until it basically destroyed my life. My mother was > devastated when I finally told her, my sisters were in shock especially > since one of the older girls was from a family extremely close to us (their > mother is godmother to two of my younger sisters), my wife was pissed > because I never told her and she had often said I occasionally acted like > someone that had been molested; something I always denied. Everyone asked > "why didn't you ever say something?" not realizing that when you're only 7 > years old you really don't know how to process something like this, and in > a society back then in the late 70's where this kind of stuff was viewed as > "coming of age" or "just a part of growing up" what was I really supposed > to say? > > Denise, to answer your question I'll ask another: What happens when you're > a woman and sexually assault or harass a boy or a man? > > I'll answer it for you: Usually nothing. > > The world continues to turn. Maybe it makes the news if you're a > celebrity, law maker, or some other type of high profile person but you > don't worry; it blows over within a few days because nobody cares. You'll > continue to get attached to movies as a director and actor (just don't > forget to send your victim his hush money first). You'll probably keep your > seat in congress or your position as CEO but even if you do step down > nobody looks upon you as a lecherous sexual deviant; somehow you're viewed > as the victim. If you're a well known professor you might get suspended but > you go back to work when it blows over. If you're one of the few that do > get arrested, you get a slap on the wrist and very rarely ever have to > register as a sex offender. > > While I get where the sarcasm comes from, Denise, I just want you to > understand that there are victims of this kind of thing that aren't female > and perps that are female. Guys like me... we're out here, we just rarely > ever talk about it. Typically we're too busy sucking it up to complain. > > Sorry about the rant y'all. > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 6:03 AM Denise Dalphond > wrote: > >> What happens when you sexually assault women? You get to be the US >> President. Or you get to stay being R Kelly makin all that money. It’s very >> common. As a school teacher, it seems that most children in the US are >> being molested and abused by at least one family member. That’s what I see. >> So it’s a part of our human fabric and almost no one cares. You’re all high >> fiving each other every time you hear a new story of a woman gettin hurt. >> So sorry for growing you. What were we thinking. >> >> I like Derrick May’s haircut right now. >> >> >> >> On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 4:57 AM Andrew Duke < >> andrewdukecognit...@gmail.com> wrote: >> >>> [Posted by Michael James on FB last night]: If you are a victim of rape >>> or sexual assault at the hands of Derrick May anywhere in the world, please >>> call Tresa Baldas at The Detroit Free Press at 1-313-378-7070. She needs to
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
So... I've been in therapy since mid-August dealing with a range of issues and at their core was the fact that I had been molested as a child, not by a family member, not by the Catholic priest I served under for three years as an altar boy, but by two older girls, one female and one male classmate, and as a teenager sexually accosted by grown women in my neighborhood in Detroit. This shit reared it's head this late in life (I'm just a few years short of 50) bringing nothing but chaos. It has destroyed my marriage, wrecked my relationship with my kids, got me in trouble with the law, and brought me to the absolute brink. It's so bad that I'll likely have to pack up my things and moving back to Michigan without my kids, where I'll end up living with my mother and stepfather... At this age. Denise, this is nothing against you... I've been on this list in one form or another for over 20 years and always have thought highly of you... But these days every time I see a woman talking about rape this and that, as if it's just a female-centric issue, I'm reminded that guys like myself are told to suck it up and shut up... and I get royally pissed. Women in general and society at large is pretty dismissive when it's a male victim of a female but "OMG!!! The horror!!! Something must be done! Teach boys not to rape!!!" when it's a female victim of a male. We're told that we should be happy that such things have happened to us when a girl or grown woman comes at us like that and that if it's a boy your age, well... "you should have just kicked his ass". I've had to sit in silence for decades, telling no one about it until it basically destroyed my life. My mother was devastated when I finally told her, my sisters were in shock especially since one of the older girls was from a family extremely close to us (their mother is godmother to two of my younger sisters), my wife was pissed because I never told her and she had often said I occasionally acted like someone that had been molested; something I always denied. Everyone asked "why didn't you ever say something?" not realizing that when you're only 7 years old you really don't know how to process something like this, and in a society back then in the late 70's where this kind of stuff was viewed as "coming of age" or "just a part of growing up" what was I really supposed to say? Denise, to answer your question I'll ask another: What happens when you're a woman and sexually assault or harass a boy or a man? I'll answer it for you: Usually nothing. The world continues to turn. Maybe it makes the news if you're a celebrity, law maker, or some other type of high profile person but you don't worry; it blows over within a few days because nobody cares. You'll continue to get attached to movies as a director and actor (just don't forget to send your victim his hush money first). You'll probably keep your seat in congress or your position as CEO but even if you do step down nobody looks upon you as a lecherous sexual deviant; somehow you're viewed as the victim. If you're a well known professor you might get suspended but you go back to work when it blows over. If you're one of the few that do get arrested, you get a slap on the wrist and very rarely ever have to register as a sex offender. While I get where the sarcasm comes from, Denise, I just want you to understand that there are victims of this kind of thing that aren't female and perps that are female. Guys like me... we're out here, we just rarely ever talk about it. Typically we're too busy sucking it up to complain. Sorry about the rant y'all. On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 6:03 AM Denise Dalphond wrote: > What happens when you sexually assault women? You get to be the US > President. Or you get to stay being R Kelly makin all that money. It’s very > common. As a school teacher, it seems that most children in the US are > being molested and abused by at least one family member. That’s what I see. > So it’s a part of our human fabric and almost no one cares. You’re all high > fiving each other every time you hear a new story of a woman gettin hurt. > So sorry for growing you. What were we thinking. > > I like Derrick May’s haircut right now. > > > > On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 4:57 AM Andrew Duke > wrote: > >> [Posted by Michael James on FB last night]: If you are a victim of rape >> or sexual assault at the hands of Derrick May anywhere in the world, please >> call Tresa Baldas at The Detroit Free Press at 1-313-378-7070. She needs to >> hear your story. Even if you wish to remain anonymous, she needs to hear >> from you. All who have reached out to me, here is a chance to stop this >> from happening to future victims. >> >> Derrick May must be unveiled independent of my actions so that there can >> be no doubt as to the veracity of these claims I have made against him. >> Please do your part. She is a member of the mainstream media and she will >> protect your privacy. >> >> - MJ >> > -- > Denise Dalphond, Ph. D. >
Re: Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
What happens when you sexually assault women? You get to be the US President. Or you get to stay being R Kelly makin all that money. It’s very common. As a school teacher, it seems that most children in the US are being molested and abused by at least one family member. That’s what I see. So it’s a part of our human fabric and almost no one cares. You’re all high fiving each other every time you hear a new story of a woman gettin hurt. So sorry for growing you. What were we thinking. I like Derrick May’s haircut right now. On Sat, Feb 22, 2020 at 4:57 AM Andrew Duke wrote: > [Posted by Michael James on FB last night]: If you are a victim of rape or > sexual assault at the hands of Derrick May anywhere in the world, please > call Tresa Baldas at The Detroit Free Press at 1-313-378-7070. She needs to > hear your story. Even if you wish to remain anonymous, she needs to hear > from you. All who have reached out to me, here is a chance to stop this > from happening to future victims. > > Derrick May must be unveiled independent of my actions so that there can > be no doubt as to the veracity of these claims I have made against him. > Please do your part. She is a member of the mainstream media and she will > protect your privacy. > > - MJ > -- Denise Dalphond, Ph. D. ethnomusicologist schoolcraftwax.work
Detroit Free Press looking to speak to victims
[Posted by Michael James on FB last night]: If you are a victim of rape or sexual assault at the hands of Derrick May anywhere in the world, please call Tresa Baldas at The Detroit Free Press at 1-313-378-7070. She needs to hear your story. Even if you wish to remain anonymous, she needs to hear from you. All who have reached out to me, here is a chance to stop this from happening to future victims. Derrick May must be unveiled independent of my actions so that there can be no doubt as to the veracity of these claims I have made against him. Please do your part. She is a member of the mainstream media and she will protect your privacy. - MJ
